Just Kate Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 With all of the recent threads about weight loss, I'd like to have a discussion about how you handle this in your household. I was a chubby kid, and then an average teen (although I thought I was SO FAT!!!). Since having kids, I am overweight. Dh is overweight, but no matter how much weight he loses, he will never be considered normal weight by the "experts". He is built like a tank and extremely muscular. Even when he was 18 in the army (before I knew him), he looked very thin and healthy in pictures, but was considered overweight and had to do extra tests to prove he was in good physical shape. Our kiddos are in the normal range for their weight, but ds is built exactly like dh. I know he is going to have a weight problem. I recently started eating a lchf diet. I'm not making my kids follow it, but I would like to move toward that direction. We do still have Jo Jos in the house (Trader Joe's Oreos) and some other snacky foods. The problem is that I have been realizing over the last several months that ds sneaks food! He does this at my parents' house as well. I have found him many times in the kitchen shoving a Joe Joe in his mouth. My mom says the same thing happens at her house. I want to talk to ds about this, but I am afraid of creating some type of weird food issue for him. Thoughts on how to teach kids/ talk with kids about good healthy foods? I have so many food issues myself and I am terrified of passing them on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 I was a food theif and my dd is a food thief (and I am a closet eater). The only thing that solves the problem for me and my dd is not to have junk in the house. No one needs the junk (weight issue or not). Since my kids were babies we have discussed healthy eating and lfestyle choices. Eating the rainbow and all that. Bottom line-kids learn what they live. If your actions do not back up your words your kids know that. If your child is sneaking food the weird food issue is already there. You can talk till you are blue in the face about the long term consequences and I can tell you from experience it wont change things. You can not be the food police. Your child will want to have to stop. At 8 years old I doubt he will really want to because junk tastes good and if you are keeping it in the house and accessible that is too great a temptation. That is a set up for failure. All you can really do is control the food he has access too. Taking him to a nutrtionist might help in terms of really understanding what is at stake with food choices. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Kate Posted January 25, 2013 Author Share Posted January 25, 2013 Yeah...I'm a closet eater too. My dh has been working out of town for 18 months (he is gone way more often than he's home). Shocking, but I have gained a bunch of weight during that time! I put the kids to bed, clean up a bit, and reward myself with FOOD!!! And there's no one there to watch what I eat. :ack2: I did stop buying cheese crackers (because I can't stay out of them!) and I guess I should stop buying cookies as well. Any other thoughts on instilling good food habits into kids? I really want to try to fix this!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rgrin Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 :iagree: My 7-year-old is a sneaker. He sneaks multiple times a day. Whenever they visit, my in-laws ALWAYS stop by Costco and buy a box or two of Nutrigrain bars and a box of Welch's fruit snacks. They get so upset (and surprised!) when they realize we've returned them to Costco again. They think they're buying somewhat healthy treats for the boys to have sometimes, but they refuse to accept that DS will find them and sneak 5 Nutrigrain bars in a single day! :banghead: We've had to remove ALL snacks of that sort from our house. We have a bowl in the fridge with cut-up veggies, and a bowl of fruit on the table. We don't even keep fruit juice or soda around. It's water only. If a treat is warranted, we purchase a single-serving at that time. Yes, it's more expensive that way, but worth it in the long run. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalmia Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 I agree with the previous posters that they can't sneak what isn't there. Plus, if it isn't there to sneak you don't get into a power struggle with them over food. You could read some of the following so you would have good arguments on hand as well (and they will strengthen your resolve. Fast food and snack food can be nasty!) For older kids (Amazon says 10 and up): Michael Pollen has a Young Reader's Edition of Omnivore's Dillemma: The Secrets Behind What You Eat. http://www.amazon.co...e's dilemma And Eric Schlosser has a youth edition (says 12 and up) of Fast Food Nation called Chew On This: Everything You Don't Want to Know About Fast Food http://www.amazon.co...ood Nation kids Michael Pollan also has: Food Rules which is very short, aimed at teens and adults, but you could pick and choose pages to share. http://www.amazon.co...pd_bxgy_b_img_z Finally, get the kids involved in growing their own veggies or at least being responsible for selecting them at the farmers' market. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
regentrude Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 We focus on fitness, not weight. Our principle is: if you're fit, you can eat what you want ;-) (Fit meant for our preteens to be able to hike ten miles without complaining) So, we do not exclude any foods, but simply instill that sweets are OK in moderation. We model healthy eating without dieting; the kids see what foods I buy: lots and lots of fruits and vegetables, quality dairy products, lean meat and fish, a variety of starches. I cook from scratch and bake my own bread. We have no soda in the house, and I do not buy highly processed foods.. BUT: there is no forbidden food in the house - so the concept of "sneaking" does not exist. Unless I specifically ask to save a certain food, they can eat whatever they find. If I were feeling they'd eat too much snack food, I would simply stop purchasing it. So if my son wants to eat cookies, he gets to eat cookies - I would not regulate his father's eating chocolate either. As long as he is in great physical shape and active, I do not micromanage. I remind him of fruit, and I counteract his teen laziness by preparing him bowls of cut apples to snack on. But raiding the cookie jar is not cause for alarm for us. So, we talk less and model more by eating healthy ourselves. When food comes up in conversation, we emphasize that all foods are OK in moderation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest inoubliable Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 Discuss it as it comes up. Model good and healthy eating habits at home and while out. Don't keep crap in the house. Don't have fast food or crap food at restaurants be an option when you're out. And if your kid asks for a dish that you know is unhealthy, suggest a few alternatives and let them know that their choice isn't a very good one compared to the few you've pointed out. As kids gets older you give them more information on why the foods you keep around and eat are considered healthy. Start as early as possible. They'll get it. Grow your own food, if possible. Change your mind on what a "treat" is. Treats can be fruits and veggies and kids won't be scarred for life. Don't feel obligated to keep around entire buckets full of Easter and Halloween candy because you don't want to waste it. Above all - talk about "healthy", not "body image". As kids get older, talk about heart health, liver health, kidney health. Don't focus on "fat" and/or "thin". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carrie12345 Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 Change your mind on what a "treat" is. Treats can be fruits and veggies and kids won't be scarred for life. This is the big one, imo! I'd love to know who started the idea that foods devoid of nutrition were proper rewards for surviving the day, lol. When healthy foods are bought and served and junk foods are limited (limited as in once in a while, not once a day or worse) there isn't much of a discussion needed. When it comes to sweets, we almost never (almost, not never-never) purchase packaged stuff. If there's a cookie craving or birthday to celebrate, baking is done. That seriously cuts down on mindless chocolate noshing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Kate Posted January 25, 2013 Author Share Posted January 25, 2013 Thanks for all of the suggestions! You know, when ds was tiny, he was the BEST eater! I made it my mission to make sure that he ate a varied diet of healthy foods. When we went to a restaurant, he ate grilled chicken and veggies or fruit (and that was at his request). People made comments to me all the time about what a good eater he was. Then, at around the age 4, he became picky as can be! I can't even really remember how it happened, but he just stopped eating (and would only eat very unhealthy food). I am sure I could have done something at this time, but I was in the position where I needed babysitters because I worked part-time. I had a great sitter, with a not-so-great understanding of healthy food. Anyway, during that time, things changed. Of course, dd follows what big brother does. I do try to steer clear of body image and even though I am technically "dieting" right now (I'm doing the induction stage of Atkins), I will never tell my kids that. I just hope they see what I am eating. My parents are overweight and my in-laws don't eat a very healthy diet. As a matter of fact, my FIL has diabetes and my mom was just diagnosed! I'd really like to stop this cycle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Kate Posted January 25, 2013 Author Share Posted January 25, 2013 This is the big one, imo! I'd love to know who started the idea that foods devoid of nutrition were proper rewards for surviving the day, lol. When healthy foods are bought and served and junk foods are limited (limited as in once in a while, not once a day or worse) there isn't much of a discussion needed. When it comes to sweets, we almost never (almost, not never-never) purchase packaged stuff. If there's a cookie craving or birthday to celebrate, baking is done. That seriously cuts down on mindless chocolate noshing. Yes, yes, yes! I used to be great at serving fruit for dessert. Now...it just doesn't happen as often. So, do I just cut my kids off cold turkey? Ds will certainly ask for Oreos (he has been hoping to get rid of the Joe Joes so he can have REAL Oreos!). I did just buy a bunch of fruit that they love. I am trying to offer that when they are craving a sweet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrs Mungo Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 It may depend upon what you consider "healthy" in your family(vegetarians, paleo people, etc may not approve), but I think the usda actually has a lot of good resources with regard to eating fruit and veggies, etc. http://www.usda.gov/wps/portal/usda/usdahome?navid=FOR_KIDS Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest inoubliable Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 So, do I just cut my kids off cold turkey? Ds will certainly ask for Oreos (he has been hoping to get rid of the Joe Joes so he can have REAL Oreos!). Sure. You're still in charge, right? ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 Yes, you cut them off cold turkey. They will probably whine, complain, and wheedle for a week but when they see you hold firm they will stop. My kids know that snacking on veggies is always ok and fruit most of the time (sometimes I would like to get an apple before they eat them all) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Kate Posted January 25, 2013 Author Share Posted January 25, 2013 Sure. You're still in charge, right? ;) Most days I am! :lol: Why is it that this seems so simple when it's put in writing, but so challenging in real life? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest inoubliable Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 Most days I am! :lol: Why is it that this seems so simple when it's put in writing, but so challenging in real life? Marketing. ;) You can do it, mama! Weekend is coming up fast - would be the perfect time to do a pantry/fridge purge and talk to your kids as you're tossing things that are less than desirable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whereneverever Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 You've received good advice but I will add that when I talk about food I also talk about exercise. I don't ban things, but I also don't buy a lot of junk. When we make dessert we talk about moderation- and the amount of healthy movement it takes to counteract that piece of cake, for example. We take walks together and do focused cardio and weight work to build healthy, strong bodies. Food is just one piece of the puzzle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted January 25, 2013 Share Posted January 25, 2013 Well my mom was not one to have sweets in tho house. Dessert for us was fruit almost all the time. Did this help me? No, I think I developed my passion for chocolate because I wasn't allowed to have it. Of course, when I was old enough, around 9 or 10, I started going to the store to buy candy. Then when I made more money, it was to buy cookies. I was skinny so there was no reason to deny me sweets. I always think how fortunate I am that I don't have diabetes since I really like chocolate and my life would be considerably worse without it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Just Kate Posted January 25, 2013 Author Share Posted January 25, 2013 Well my mom was not one to have sweets in tho house. Dessert for us was fruit almost all the time. Did this help me? No, I think I developed my passion for chocolate because I wasn't allowed to have it. Of course, when I was old enough, around 9 or 10, I started going to the store to buy candy. Then when I made more money, it was to buy cookies. I was skinny so there was no reason to deny me sweets. I always think how fortunate I am that I don't have diabetes since I really like chocolate and my life would be considerably worse without it. This is what I worry about. If I don't have any cookies (or whatever) around, will the kids just become determined to find it elsewhere? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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