Runningmom80 Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 I got this comment today, "I wonder if you and other people who claim that their children are gifted have read books like 'Mindset' by Carol Dweck or 'Nurture Shock' by Po Bronson. Those psychologists say that you always have to praise their effort and not rely on their intelligence. But you guys seem to stick only on their intelligence saying they are gifted. They are gifted learners. PERIOD. They are not gifted doers. There is a big difference between those two terms. So my humble request is to stop claiming that they are gifted/genius/whatever and start to focus on what they DO. You all need to change your mindset. Have you read the NPR report http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2012/11/12/164793058/struggle-for-smarts-how-eastern-and-western-cultures-tackle-learning?utm_source=NPR&utm_medium=facebook&utm_campaign=20121112 Please read it." I replied, but I'm just wondering if anyone else on the tour got anything like this, that post is months old, and I barely blog, so I find it interesting to get a comment now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 I've gotten such comments from people for years-especially when I've had articles or columns in journals or presented at conferences. In most cases, I don't think the commenter actually read what I said or listened to my talk-they came in with an agenda and are focused on the definition of "gifted" as high performing", and miss that I'm talking about "gifted" as a diagnostic label with certain characteristic behaviors and traits, one of which CAN be high performance, but not always. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BugsMama Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 Sounds like someone has a bug up their butt, IMO. Personally, I would delete it, and move on. Well, and fume a little. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theYoungerMrsWarde Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 :blink::glare: No, no comment like that on my blog post from the tour. Sorry you had to deal with that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MinivanMom Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 I've gotten such comments from people for years-especially when I've had articles or columns in journals or presented at conferences. In most cases, I don't think the commenter actually read what I said or listened to my talk-they came in with an agenda and are focused on the definition of "gifted" as high performing", and miss that I'm talking about "gifted" as a diagnostic label with certain characteristic behaviors and traits, one of which CAN be high performance, but not always. :iagree: Some people, honestly, just have issues with the word "gifted". Nothing you say will ever convince them. Just ignore them and continue to teach your children where they are at. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
La Texican Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 I received no such comments. How strange that they put it on your blog instead of in a forum to talk about it. I'd be tempted to say something that sounds like, "opinions are like noses, everybody's got one." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zenjenn Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 I haven't read your blog, and that comment is cranky and rude, but the content of what he is saying I do think is important. It is very easy for a gifted student to lapse into coasting and rarely experience the process of struggling to overcome challenges. And I do see parents who just boast about their child's straight A report card or exemplary test scores as if *that* is the goal, and I do think that is misguided. One of the things I think when my child gets 100% all the time is.. "I am not challenging her enough..." I think most of us here get that. On these forums we're all either home educators or those taking a very *active* role in our children's educations. But I can sympathize - I do know of gifted adults who were just lauded as children and coasted through school, and then found it difficult to transition their gifts to success as adults. I think it's something parents of gifted children DO have to be aware of and address. No matter how gifted or brilliant you are, if you don't learn how to overcome adversity and drive over the proverbial speed bumps, your ability to be successful in your adult life will be limited. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dmmetler Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 In the context, though, it's really obvious the commenter just reacted to the word "Gifted", without reading the post they were commenting on or understanding what was said if they did. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arcadia Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 And I do see parents who just boast about their child's straight A report card or exemplary test scores as if *that* is the goal, and I do think that is misguided. I get that boasting on facebook all the time and I think that is what might have gotten the commentor into a "bad mood" about the word "gifted". It is so often misused. I got this comment today, "....... So my humble request is to stop claiming that they are gifted/genius/whatever and start to focus on what they DO. You all need to change your mindset. :lol: Am I allowed to say to the commentor that my 6 year old boy is gifted at talking like the politicians in Congress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathy G Posted November 13, 2012 Share Posted November 13, 2012 These types of comments are what make me thankful for forums such as WTM. Imagine if we didn't have all the technology to share with each other- sometimes parents of gifted children equals loneliness!:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaners Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 A good portion of my free reading books tends to fall into the category of the mentioned books. They are interesting. They are not infallible. All of the theories the current research has swept aside were once also crucial and necessary for parents to embrace if they hoped to avoid ruining the lives of their children. I'm sure something else will come along eventually to disprove this advice. If something resonates with you, embrace it. If it doesn't? Don't worry. We will all be introduced to new ways we are screwing up soon enough. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aly9712 Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 No, thankfully I haven't gotten any so far on my post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Runningmom80 Posted November 14, 2012 Author Share Posted November 14, 2012 Thanks for the replies everyone. I was just curious, because it was sort of out of the blue. I was a tiny bit sensitive to it at first because today is actually DS' birthday, and I was mad this person had to pick his birthday to call me out. Anyways, the funniest part is that I ended that blog post talking about how achievement, hard work and motivation are the real indicators of success, not IQ. Plus, the point of my post is that we as parents don't want our kids to coast, if we did, we wouldn't be advocating for them! :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pree Posted November 14, 2012 Share Posted November 14, 2012 sorry wrong place Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jenbrdsly Posted November 19, 2012 Share Posted November 19, 2012 It took me a while to figure out how to reply on the new forum. I guess I'm not a very gifted "doer". :) I'm wondering if that article/video about "is your child gifted" that was on yahoo this week might be what triggered that mean comment Runningmom. That's the only thing I can think of. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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