KristinaBreece Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Poll coming!! I have a baby cradle that my mother used when we were babies. She gave it to me when she moved right after I got out of high school. It still meets safety req's. I used it for my children as infants. I want to keep it to give to them when they have children. But.... I also want to share it with my brothers. My SIL (brother's wife) is having her baby shower this weekend. I was going to give her the cradle at the shower. Buuut... is it tacky to give a gift that is expected to be returned at some point? I mean, I don't anticipate needing it back until my kids are grown or my other brothers (aged 18 and 11 right now-- not likely to be having babies anytime soon) start their families. B & SIL would of course be welcome to use it for this and any subsequent babies they have in the mean time. I guess I don't have to share it at all, but I thought it would be a nice thing to do. What says the Hive? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TXBeth Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 Have you asked if they want to use it and made it clear you would eventually want it back? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 I'd give a regular gift, that she gets to keep, AND lend her the cradle. Maybe with a homemade gift card that says "use of family cradle until next family member needs it" or some such, so expectations are clear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KristinaBreece Posted May 18, 2012 Author Share Posted May 18, 2012 Always a clarification... I do have another gift for them. My aunt made their nursery curtains, and I made them a quilt and 2 floor pillows that go with their theme. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kewb Posted May 18, 2012 Share Posted May 18, 2012 If it is a loan I would not give it at the baby shower. I would give a gift and at another time ask her if she would like to borrow the cradle. Making sure it is clear it is a loan and you want it back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rwjx2khsmj Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 If it is a loan I would not give it at the baby shower. I would give a gift and at another time ask her if she would like to borrow the cradle. Making sure it is clear it is a loan and you want it back. :iagree: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
katilac Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I would only bring it to the baby shower if you are absolutely, positively sure she already knows it would be a loan, and that she wants to use it. Otherwise, awkwardness will ensue. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss Marple Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 It has been my experience that if something is valuable to me, I should not loan it out. Too many things happen...people move and forget that they borrowed it, they forget they borrowed it and sell it (or send it to the dump :eek:), or they break it/damage it. If I can still be joyful if it doesn't come back to me or is somehow damaged, I will loan it. But if I will be sad and resentful if it does not come back to me, I keep it. In your case, being that you want to hand it down to your kids, and being that your mom gave it to you, I would certainly hesitate to loan it out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brenda in FL Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I voted no as a gift, but I see no reason why it couldn't be presented at the shower. Do you know the organizers of the shower? Perhaps you can bring the cradle, it can be used to display gifts/be part of the decorations. And the guests could be told that the baby's father had used it as a baby, etc. etc. That's assuming that SIL has already decided that she would like to use it. We have a cradle that many of my cousins slept in and one of my siblings. All the babies names were carved into it. When the cousins started having babies, my sister and I were the only ones that wanted to use it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirch Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 I voted no. I'd find a separate time to give it to them and explain about wanting it back and I'd bring a separate gift for the shower. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
happypamama Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 If it is a loan I would not give it at the baby shower. I would give a gift and at another time ask her if she would like to borrow the cradle. Making sure it is clear it is a loan and you want it back. Yes, this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
houseofkids&pets Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 :iagree:I think it is kind that you want to share it with your siblings. I just wouldn't do it at the shower since you are letting them borrow, not keep it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrganicAnn Posted May 19, 2012 Share Posted May 19, 2012 If you give it as a gift at a baby shower, then that implies it is theirs to do with as they want - sell it, trash it, give it away. Give a different presents and ask if they want to borrow it. Even then I would keep track of it if you really want it back, because it still could get sold, given away etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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