Desperate for some help with our toddler.

[Canadianmumof5]

Chunky is 2 and has this bald patch on the back of his head that continues to get bigger. He has a habit of twirling/rubbing his hair when he sucks his thumb and this is what has happened over the past 6 months. It is getting bigger and bigger.

 

Our family dr was mildly concerned and said if he doesn't stop - that it could impede the future growth. So we've been trying lots of different things over the last few months;

Ignoring it completely.

Gently discouraging it and re-directing him.

Being firm and telling him no.

MIL sewed socks onto the sleeves of his PJs so he couldn't suck his thumb or touch his hair but it doesn't work.

Discouraging thumb sucking period. The older kids keep telling him he is a big boy and big boys don't suck their thumbs.

 

We are seriously at the end of our rope with this. My aunt suggested that we just give him a buzz cut for the summer and then he has nothing to pull/twirl/rub.........in theory it makes sense.

 

Has anyone had their toddler do this?? How did you stop it?

 

We're not sure exactly why he is doing this. When he was a baby and I nursed him, he was always playing with my hair. And he will often sit with DD8 and cuddle with her, while sucking his thumb and will play with her hair. He does the same with me.

 

Any ideas????? Please :(

[thescrappyhomeschooler]

The buzz cut sounds like a good idea. He might be upset at first that there's nothing to play with, but he'll get used to it. You'll have to keep it cut frequently so that there's a long enough time for him to forget about the hair.

[Momof3littles]

Someone I know made a lovey out of her ponytail for her child. He stroked it while falling asleep. She was tired of him needing her hair.

 

Have you tried substituting a new lovey and redirecting to that consistently?

[MamaT]

I would cut his hair to break him of the habit of twirling that one spot. My second son did that, and still runs his fingers through my hair when he is near me. He does it to his wife, too. He's 24. :001_smile:

 

ETA: My sister bought him a real human hair wig, but he never wanted that. The hair had to be attached to a person.

[Canadianmumof5]

Yes, we tried to give him DDs AG doll to cuddle with (and pull its hair!!) but he wasn't interested at all. We even put it in his bed at night thinking that might help....it didn't. He has a yellow knit blanket that he loves to sleep with but it is no substitute for this hair rubbing.

[Reflections]

The buzz cut sounds like a good idea. He might be upset at first that there's nothing to play with, but he'll get used to it. You'll have to keep it cut frequently so that there's a long enough time for him to forget about the hair.

 

This. BUT I would NOT discourage the thumb sucking at this time. That is one too many things to take away at once. My daughter sucked her thumb until almost five and her teeth are fine - if that is a worry. He obviously needs the comforting if he is also twirling your dds hair.

[Canadianmumof5]

I would cut his hair to break him of the habit of twirling that one spot. My second son did that, and still runs his fingers through my hair when he is near me. He does it to his wife, too. He's 24. :001_smile:

 

ETA: My sister bought him a real human hair wig, but he never wanted that. The hair had to be attached to a person.

 

Does his hair look ok now??? I am so worried that Chunky has permanently wore away this area of his head. It is the size of a donut and it started out the size of a donut hole!

[sewingmama]

I had a friend who's daughter used to do this -she ended up having to give her a really short haircut.

 

This kind of habit can be hard to break because there adults who do the same thing - to the point of baldness and yet they can't stop themselves either.

 

I would go for the buzz cut until he outgrows/forgets the habit. I doubt at his age he has damaged his scalp permanently. My friends daughter's hair grew back in beautiful and thick after she quit twirling it and she was about 3-4 years old and had been doing it since she was 1.

[oraetstudia]

My friend had a daughter who did this. They did keep her head buzzed for a couple of years on and off until she stopped.

[mumto2]

Not sure if this is any help but my son played with his belly button constantly. It was really red and inflamed. I paid him in tootsie rolls to leave it alone. I paid his sister to report him. After a while they both got one if he left it alone for 1/2 a day. Then a day. Then we ran out. We had 1bag. They both understood he needed to stop because we were afraid of infection. I am not sure if he was 2 or 3. But we stopped the habit within a couple of weeks.

[mom2att]

We are seriously at the end of our rope with this. My aunt suggested that we just give him a buzz cut for the summer and then he has nothing to pull/twirl/rub.........in theory it makes sense.

 

Has anyone had their toddler do this?? How did you stop it?

 

 

Yes, and the above is exactly what we did. He was two and looked like a commercial for Rogaine. Took exactly two buzz cuts for him to stop doing it. He's 11 now and doesn't pull his hair . . . but he does say that his eyelashes bother him and pull them out sometimes. It's a sensory thing, and he's always been a sensory sensitive kid. Oh, and he has a full head of hair--no problems with it not growing back.

 

Just be glad he's a boy--a girl with a buzz cut is somehow not as acceptable.

[Lab1]

All of my kids have loved my hair! My 3 yr old will twirl his hair if he has to, but perfers mine. Lately he's been pulling hard enough to make me scream in shock. I cut my hair above my shoulders and it didn't help.

 

I'd try the buzz cut first and see if it helps. He needs some way to comfort his young self, so I'd concentrate on his hair for a few months first.

[Alphabetika]

Someone I know made a lovey out of her ponytail for her child. He stroked it while falling asleep. She was tired of him needing her hair.

 

Have you tried substituting a new lovey and redirecting to that consistently?

 

My 2yo is obsessed with stroking my arm while she sucks her thumb. I wonder if I could just....cut it off!

 

Hee hee! Sorry, I'm in a weird mood. :D

[pfamilygal]

My 4 yr old does that. He's rockin' the Jew-fro right now. His hair is soooo wiry and curly that it just puffs up on his head. There's no taming it with a comb for sure! When he gets tired, he rubs the back between two fingers and sucks his thumb. So I keep it buzzed super short. Like a 2 all over.

[Mommyof4ks]

The buzz cut will work. This is going to sound bad, but my youngest was a hair twirler until he had to get treatment for cancer and his hair all fell out (oh the beautiful curls he had, people were jealous it was so cute). He did twirl my hair to go to sleep for a few weeks following the hair loss, but once the hair grew back he no longer twirled it. Again, I know that sounds bad, but seriously a buzz cut will work.

 

Thumb sucking I know nothing about.

[Mama Geek]

I had a cousin who has just recently stopped this and he is about 11. They have kept his hair buzz cut for a long time. I haven't seen him in awhile to know if the hair has grown in or not. I don't know what made him quit.

[catz]

My friend had a daughter who did this. They did keep her head buzzed for a couple of years on and off until she stopped.

 

:iagree: Cousins daughter did the same thing. They kept it buzz cut when she was a toddler. She has lovely hair now at 10. :-D

[Tap]

I would start with a buzz cut. It is simple to do, will grow back and can help him stop if it is just a bad habit.

 

If it goes beyond the summer, I would look into occupational therapy for the issue. You may be able to do the work at home if you do not want to take him to a therapy office. He may need to be taught other more appropriate self calming strategies.

[Canadianmumof5]

Thanks for the replies, and the encouragement!

We did go and get him a buzz cut. And so far, so good!!!!! He hasn't bothered at all with his hair! Hopefully this has ended it??

Here are a couple of pics so you can see how HUGE the bald spot had become......it was pretty bad.

[Starr]

He looks so cute. I hope it works out well for him.