HappyLady Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 I'm starting to get questioned about my DD starting pre-K in the fall and lately I've started telling people that I don't plan on sending her and instead I'm going to do a trial year of homeschooling. If it works out, great. If not, she'll go to kindergarten. I'm worried, though, about when they ask my reasons. I know I don't *have* to have a reason, but I have plenty! I want to share them with people, but I don't want anyone to get offended because they choose to send their child to PS or because "I went to PS and turned out ok." Is there a standard response besides "because I want to" that seems to get people to not ask follow up questions? Or how do you suggest I answer people? Do I answer honestly and deal with the repercussions? I just really dislike getting into debates with people over my choices in life. :glare: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dsmama Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 "This is the right thing for our family right now." This works for me. Most people are brazen enough to question educational options but not family choices. Good luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 "This is the right thing for our family right now." This works for me. Most people are brazen enough to question educational options but not family choices. Good luck. :iagree: No matter how pleasantly you respond and no matter how inoffensively you give a reason, some people will not like it or consider it a criticism. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 Since you really DON'T know yet if you will send her or not, I wouldn't even bring it up at this point. Dawn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NanceXToo Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 Why don't you just say "We'd like her to be home with her family at this age?" Or "We want to have more time with her." Or "We've decided to keep her home with us a while longer." Something simple and matter of fact and end of story. :) You don't have to argue, debate or explain anything more than you have to, and any simple explanation you give has nothing to do with choices other people have made. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperDad Posted February 1, 2012 Share Posted February 1, 2012 "This is the right thing for our family right now." This works for me. Most people are brazen enough to question educational options but not family choices. Good luck. :iagree: That's my standard response. If a person is rude enough to continue pestering me about it, then I simply ask them to pass the bean dip. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momof2georgia Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 This was me this year!! My son went to a 3 year old class at our church last year. This year we decided to keep him home. I wanted to give homeschooling a try and I figured this was the year to try it. I'm so thankful that we did. It has been a wonderful experience. Challenging, yes. But great. It was difficult for me to tell people. My family (mom, sister, etc) was especially hard. But I just told everyone that we feel that this is the best decision for my 4 year old and for us as a family. Most people didn't ask any more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misslissa Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 As long as you're sharing your reasons (whatever they are) in a respectful manner, how others take it is not on your shoulders. I frequently voice my reservations about PS. My hope is for families to think through why they do something and not just do it because that's what most everyone else is doing. I'm worried, though, about when they ask my reasons. I know I don't *have* to have a reason, but I have plenty! I want to share them with people, but I don't want anyone to get offended because they choose to send their child to PS or because "I went to PS and turned out ok." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kalanamak Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 I'm starting to get questioned about my DD starting pre-K in the fall and lately I've started telling people that I don't plan on sending her and instead I'm going to do a trial year of homeschooling. If it works out, great. If not, she'll go to kindergarten. At this point, I'd just say, when questioned about pre-K (for heaven's sake), "we decided against it". Leave it at that. If asked why, repeat with a bigger smile. BTW, I'm not quite sure how pre-K doesn't work out, short of mom not being able to stand being around child all the time. Even if she isn't reading and starting 1st grade math (;)) it is not proof it didn't work out.:001_smile: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jen in PA Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 "This is the right thing for our family right now." This works for me. Most people are brazen enough to question educational options but not family choices. Good luck. :iagree: This manages to be both honest and vague enough that people have a hard time arguing with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 No, there isn't anything you can say to keep people from asking more questions. Nothing polite, anyway. :tongue_smilie: I wouldn't say you're doing a "trial" year, though. Just say you aren't sending her to school for kindergarten. If you want to, you can add something about how kindergarten isn't mandatory in your state, and you're pretty sure you can teach her what she'd learn there, and more, and you really like having her home. Then say, "So, how about that Super Bowl?" :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heidi Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 I'm starting to get questioned about my DD starting pre-K in the fall and lately I've started telling people that I don't plan on sending her and instead I'm going to do a trial year of homeschooling. If it works out, great. If not, she'll go to kindergarten. I'm worried, though, about when they ask my reasons. I know I don't *have* to have a reason, but I have plenty! I want to share them with people, but I don't want anyone to get offended because they choose to send their child to PS or because "I went to PS and turned out ok." Is there a standard response besides "because I want to" that seems to get people to not ask follow up questions? Or how do you suggest I answer people? Do I answer honestly and deal with the repercussions? I just really dislike getting into debates with people over my choices in life. :glare: I hate tip-toeing around people's insecurities too, so I don't. I sincerely don't mean to offend anyone by saying how glad I am that I homeschool and that I love being with my kids all day. I refuse to stress over how my enthusiasm and life choices plays on their conscience. They have the choice to be offended or not. I wouldn't worry about it. However, if you don't want to get into defending your WHYs, then I would keep it short and simple. I've learned to do that too. Some people just come from different planets and will never understand or agree. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heidi Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 Oh, I didn't hide my disdane for Kindergarten. Why did I want to homeschool Kindergarten? "Because Kindergarten is a COMPLETE waste of time!" That was my reason and I expressed it often. :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AdventureMoms Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 DD is already getting "why aren't you in SCHOOL?" questions when we're out and about. She's 3. We are definitely planning to homeschool, but I really don't feel the urge to explain that to folks who wonder why a 3yo would be with her mom during the day. I usually just say "she's 3". If they give me cr@p about preschool (some do!) I just say "we decided not to do that" and move on. Next year she's preK eligible, and the following year Kindy eligible. I'm sure I'll be answering lots more fun questions then! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stacycatherine Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 Oh, I didn't hide my disdane for Kindergarten. Why did I want to homeschool Kindergarten? "Because Kindergarten is a COMPLETE waste of time!" That was my reason and I expressed it often. :D :lol::lol::lol: I agree! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphabetika Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 :iagree: No matter how pleasantly you respond and no matter how inoffensively you give a reason, some people will not like it or consider it a criticism. This is so true. I've actually given this answer more than once: "Because I'm a rebel." No one seems to know what to say. And I actually think that, "Because we want to," is a valid answer. After all, why does the questioner (if that person is a public school parent) send her kids to public school? Because that's what everyone does? Or......? Well, why? I think people don't ask themselves enough questions. No matter what educational method we choose, we should be choosing it deliberately, not as a default. And it's always curious to me when non-homeschoolers think that homeschoolers need to answer questions that the questioners may or may not be able to answer about themselves. In real life I'm not at all defensive about this (though I realize I sound like it with the above answer) but I think about it quite a bit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eternalknot Posted February 2, 2012 Share Posted February 2, 2012 Is there a standard response besides "because I want to" that seems to get people to not ask follow up questions? Or how do you suggest I answer people? Do I answer honestly and deal with the repercussions? I just really dislike getting into debates with people over my choices in life. :glare: I think there's a way to be assertive, without being defensive: "I could tell you any of the 20 reasons I have, but really what it boils down to is this: it's what feels right for our family right now." Some people will assume there's something going on, but they won't dare ask. Let them wonder, who cares. If you or they are Christian, there's always the "I feel called/led to do it" that might come across in a way that better speaks to them. If pressed, you could do the pre-emptive: "Mama's intuition hasn't let me down yet, so I'm rollin' with it! Isn't it wonderful how many options we have today?" I'd be careful of telling people you're "trying it out" -- that's almost an invitation (for some personalities) to talk you out of it or to show non-support in an effort to 'save' you from your 'silly' idea. Own your decision, and trust yourself! Assert it: "I'll be homeschooling pre-school." The world doesn't need to know that it's a trial year, and that makes you appear more vulnerable to their interventions (and questions!). Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.