melissel Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Tbog posted a thread about her 9-year-old, and it made me think about my own just-turned-9-year-old. I'd been wondering, but her post prompted me to actually ask. I posted this in the other thread: ...My DD, who just turned 9, has suddenly developed some interesting anxieties and quirks as well.... Suddenly, things that never bothered her are making her a little anxious, she's opting out of things that she used to love to do (a trip to the sprayground, a trip to the pool), she's suddenly rejecting foods that she used to love (we practically lived on eggs for a few years, and suddenly she "has always hated them" :confused:), etc. It's been mystifying me, but I'm wondering if there's an age/hormone/developmental thing going on. Is this something that's kind of common? I mean, obviously, I was a 9-year-old girl once, but I had no perspective on my own personality, and I was an only child, so I had no siblings to observe. Is this a common time for some personality shifts? TIA! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parrothead Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 My dd has always been a bit anxious. What I actually started seeing about that age was her coming into her own and starting to outgrown some of the anxiety. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WishboneDawn Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Honestly no but I feel like an odd duck. My daughter is 13 now and is well into puberty and aside from the maturity one sees with age I've seen no big shifts in her personality yet. I'm crossing my fingers that this is just how it will be with her. I was a late bloomer and hormones never really affected me the way they did other girls so there's hope. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I.Dup. Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I started noticing hormonal changes around this year with my 9yo (she will be 10 in January). It's hard to tell personality wise because she has always been moody and difficult. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris in VA Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 My very easy kiddo started having a more sarcastic attitude and weepiness from time to time when she was 9ish. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaSheep Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 My sweet, cooperative, cheerful, sunshiney girl was recently eaten by a moody, weepy, anxious, bossy, know-it-all pod creature that looks just like her. Had she not been body snatched, she would have turned nine at the end of July. ;) My son was a whole other level of mess when he was nine too, though in his case it was an escalation of problems that were already there, whearas with her, it's a more dramatic switch. I'm hoping she grows out of it as fast as he did (it took about a year). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 My dd has always been a bit anxious. What I actually started seeing about that age was her coming into her own and starting to outgrown some of the anxiety.:iagree:Nothing but positive changes here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissel Posted September 11, 2011 Author Share Posted September 11, 2011 My sweet, cooperative, cheerful, sunshiney girl was recently eaten by a moody, weepy, anxious, bossy, know-it-all pod creature that looks just like her. Had she not been body snatched, she would have turned nine at the end of July. ;) :lol: Yes, similar here. She's always been a little short with her younger sister (who is a force to be reckoned with all on her own :smash:), but I've heard some of the snottiest, angriest things come out of her mouth lately *sigh* I very rarely have to actually discipline DD9, and I think I've had to discipline her more in the past month or so than I have in the whole rest of her life! I wonder if it's a kind of switcharound that seems to occur? If our easygoing kids become more moody and snippy and anxious, and our more spirited or anxious kids become less so? I'll be interested to see what other responses may say. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 (edited) Not at those ages, but what I am seeing with my 12 yr old is how sensitive and defensive she has become during conversations. If I don't say something exactly correctly, she is all over me like white on rice. She will also blurt out, "That's not true!" or "I never said that!" at things that are true. I know she is becomming more self-conscious, but I want her to consider her words and the affect they can have on others. It's surprising to me, although it should not be, as I have been through this with 3 older children and am just coming out of it now with the 17 yr old. I think my surprise has to do with the fact that she has always been so magnanimous and generous in this way. She is certainly in puberty now, so I suppose it had to happen. I know this is just a stage, but it is annoying and I have said that it's important to have a brain- to- mouth filter. All thoughts do not need to be spoken, and it's fine to ask for clarification, without putting the other person on the spot. It's also not kind to say something is untrue when it isn't. I also have to be more considerate when I am talking about her activities and situations when speaking with others. Maybe she doesn't want to be a topic of conversatio. Gasping, "That didn't happen!" is her way of trying to end the conversation. It's such simple things, too, nothing terribly personal. 'She cleaned the whole kitchen as a surprise for me the other day!" can bring about an attitude commnet, "I didn't do it as a surprise! I just did it!" etc Confusing to a mother. lol Still, I find it quite annoying. ;) Edited September 11, 2011 by LibraryLover Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melissel Posted September 11, 2011 Author Share Posted September 11, 2011 It's such simple things, too, nothing terribly personal. 'She cleaned the whole kitchen as a surprise for me the other day!" can bring about an attitude commnet, "I didn't do it as a surprise! I just did it!" etc Confusing to a mother. lol I so remember conversations like this with my mom :lol: I remember feeling like she just didn't understand me AT ALL! Too funny... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TeacherZee Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I think my mom still has nightmares about the year when I was 8 :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barb_ Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 No, I've never noticed any personality changes at that age. I have one anxious daughter who happens to be turning 10, but she's been that way since she was a toddler. I might worry that there was something going on with her that she isn't sharing. It doesn't necessarily have to be something traumatic, but there may be a friend issue, or she may have overheard something out of context that has her worried, and she's too embarrassed to share. Experience tells me sudden and inexplicable anxieties should be examined further. Barb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
funschooler5 Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 My oldest DD went through a short personality change when she was 10. For about 3-4 months she was completely depressed. She'd cry at the drop of a hat, and say she just didn't feel happy about anything. She worried over every little thing. I specifically remember her singing with her choir during a Christmas program, and DH took some pictures...she was frowning the whole way through. A kid depressed at Christmas time! Then, she just got over it. She never went through anything like that again. It was really strange. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ereks mom Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Tbog posted a thread about her 9-year-old, and it made me think about my own just-turned-9-year-old. I'd been wondering, but her post prompted me to actually ask. I posted this in the other thread: ...My DD, who just turned 9, has suddenly developed some interesting anxieties and quirks as well.... Suddenly, things that never bothered her are making her a little anxious, she's opting out of things that she used to love to do (a trip to the sprayground, a trip to the pool), she's suddenly rejecting foods that she used to love (we practically lived on eggs for a few years, and suddenly she "has always hated them" ), etc. It's been mystifying me, but I'm wondering if there's an age/hormone/developmental thing going on. Is this something that's kind of common? I mean, obviously, I was a 9-year-old girl once, but I had no perspective on my own personality, and I was an only child, so I had no siblings to observe. Is this a common time for some personality shifts? TIA! Yes, EK (will be 17 in about 3 weeks) actually went through this when she was about 10-11, in the months leading up to and for some time after her first period, which occurred a few days after her 11th birthday. I did pretty much exactly the same thing, except that my first period was at age 12½. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Night Elf Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 My girls went through a weird shift around age 11/12. They just became more sensitive to things and cried more easily. Their moods were swift to change, happy one moment, angry the next, and perfectly fine just after that. I don't remember dd19 doing that very long. I just remember the times she would stomp all the way upstairs and slam her door while I was sitting on the sofa looking and feeling totally confused. She would calm down in about 30 minutes and come sit in my lap and cry about how she didn't understand why she felt so weird. But I really don't remember it lasting that long. I didn't have those problems with her at age 14 and above. Dd13, otoh, is still kind of it it. It's not as bad as it used to be, but she still gets moody. She cries very easily and then gets angry for it. But she does feel like it's getting better. At least she doesn't get grumpy and snappy at me anymore. :) Oh, and I don't know if this has anything to with the onset of the cycle. Dd19 started on her 13th birthday and dd12 started a few months after she turned 12. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LibraryLover Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 (edited) I so remember conversations like this with my mom :lol: I remember feeling like she just didn't understand me AT ALL! Too funny... :) That particular example made me raise my eye -brows as she texted me from her sister's phone, "You're going to be happy and a little bit surprised when you get home!" She is such a dear, with a huge and empathic heart. I am hoping if I remember not to share sweet stories, she will be less likely to be upset about my sharing sweet stories. We have such nice conversations together. I must simply ;) remember to not speak too, too much in public. :lol: I shall try! Edited September 12, 2011 by LibraryLover Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lovedtodeath Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 No, I've never noticed any personality changes at that age. I have one anxious daughter who happens to be turning 10, but she's been that way since she was a toddler. I might worry that there was something going on with her that she isn't sharing. It doesn't necessarily have to be something traumatic, but there may be a friend issue, or she may have overheard something out of context that has her worried, and she's too embarrassed to share. Experience tells me sudden and inexplicable anxieties should be examined further.Good point. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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