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I'm so tired of my kids not listening!!


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I just sent my 8 and 10 year old to their rooms until dinner. I'm so so so tired of being ignored!! I asked them to clean their toys off the floor so I can vacuum. I asked twice, they continued to play then the 8 year old gave me attitude about how much work she has to do!! Grrr.

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I feel your pain. I had a similar experience with my 13 and and almost 11 year old yesterday. Ds started to complain of all he had to do and I looked at him and asked "Do you really want me to make a list of all I do and all you do?" He went and cleaned his room.

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here too.

 

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

 

I just gutted my youngest room. I took out 2 black hefty bags of stuff and threw it out. I was tired of her not picking up after herself. NOW she has only a few things and it's manageable and I no longer have to look at the mess.

 

Im such a mean mom.

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Those were hard ages for my dc. So far (barring any late teen angst, but I dont see that happening :D,) 8-11 were the worst years. :grouphug:

 

ETA: Only read on if you were looking for advice (I'm not sure if you were just venting...)

 

What worked for me was consistency and consequences. If they have a negative outcome every time they don't listen the first time, they learn to listen and obey. I don't have the time to tell anybody anything twice. :001_smile:

 

My solution for the 8 yo would be a few days of hard labor. Let him do all you and/or dh do for a while and see how easy his life is. Or add a chore to his list every time he tells you he has too much to do (he did have enough free time to complain, after all ;).) Toys that aren't picked up the first time are confiscated and earned back.

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Yep. Got an 8 & 10 year old who believe they have the ability to tell me no. Add to that a 3 year old copycat who idolizes the big two and you've got one Mama who is going to lose her mind!

 

They're going to be very unhappy kids soon when I go on strike and they have to fend for themselves. :glare:

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A friend of mine collected all the things that weren't picked up around the house, put them in the bathtub and the kids have to pay to get their things back.......

 

This listening not listening goes in cycles for me...It will be fine for awhile and than it won't be.....I agree with Angela, I know the listening has a lot to do with my lack of consistency...Dang it! It is just so hard to be consistent when you have ADHD:glare:

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Yep. Got an 8 & 10 year old who believe they have the ability to tell me no. Add to that a 3 year old copycat who idolizes the big two and you've got one Mama who is going to lose her mind!

 

 

 

Hey, this is us. 8, 10, and a 3 year old copycat. I hear a lot of NO.

 

The last time I asked for toys to get picked up so I could vacuum and my request wasn't filled, I started chucking toys into the garbage can. We also have a "no garbage picking" rule. I get taken a little more seriously now.

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I just smile, pick up the offending toys and throw them in a trash bag and that is the end of that. The toys go in the trash. You can't earn them back, they are gone, sorry.

 

We don't even buy them toys anymore, so they don't have many. They don't have many clothes either and what they do have gets pruned regularly. Same with shoes. And I am quite happy to take the only pair of shoes a kid has and hide them away in my room until the end of time, if need be. Hey, they don't go to school right? They don't NEED shoes. Too bad they can't go outside and play without them... maybe someone needs to work on earning those shoes back. :D

 

As for the attitude, I find yanking them up off the floor or off the couch with one hand on the waistband of the pants and the other on the shoulder and literally tossing them into their bedroom (which in my house is sans tv, dvd, radio, computer, electronic games, ect.) and leaving them to stare at the wall until I decide to let them live tends to have at least a little shock value. Especially when sometimes it takes quite a long time for me to decide to let them out. I am also not adverse to sending a rude child to bed with no supper, none of the older ones ever starved to death so I figure it won't kill the younger ones.

 

I'm pretty sneaky too. If I have a kid in a bedroom for attitude I will take the opportunity to bake brownies or no-bakes or something and that child won't get any. I have been known to bake an entire batch of brownies and eat them myself while the poor dears drooled watching me, just because I really meant it when I said I wasn't giving them any unless they got all their chores done.

 

Even today my adult children quiver when they hear a certain tone in my voice. I may be short, but I am MIGHTY. There is a difference between mercy and justice, and kids can scent mercy like a shark scents blood. No mercy, I say. :smash:

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