Who here has experience with unassisted birth?

[Karen sn]

I have never been exposed to this but have spent the last few days watching videos of women catching their own babies. AWESOME!!!

Has anyone here done it?

Has anyone given birth with just your man there?

 

Check this out:

 

http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com

 

http://www.unassistedhomebirth.com

 

This is a smiling mother who laughs her baby out - there are attendants but they don't interfere like one would expect

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aht0HqI7GSw&NR=1

 

There are a ton of unassisted birth videos at youtube. It makes me think about how many people were at my homebirth with dd and I think I'd like less intervention with this one.

 

I am sure that someone I know here has had to have done this.

I really want to.

And before I ever even thought of it last week - I met a huge pregnant woman who had already done it and was going to again. I think it was meant for me to see her that day.

 

I am leaving shortly for work - looking forward to your thoughts on this. I will check back before I leave and this afternoon.

Thanks in advance for any information you can share with me.

[abbeyej]

I had my second unassisted. I did a ton of research beforehand, I interviewed several local midwives and decided against that option. I had a really great OB who was actually more hands-off than the midwives available to me, so I had a couple of zero-intervention appointments during the pregnancy so that I knew *if* for any reason I felt the baby and I would be safer at the hospital, I could go in and get excellent care from someone I trusted and who knew how important this baby was to me. (I didn't tell him till afterwards that I only planned to go to the hospital under duress.)

 

It was a fabulous experience and I would do it again. I would also have a back-up plan again. I did tons of reading and self-care ahead of time, so I felt prepared -- and I also knew under which circumstances I would go to the hospital (including plain old, "something doesn't seem right").

 

Do be careful in reading some of the UA websites and "gurus". There are people who would rather face catastrophe than medical intervention of any kind -- who believe that's more right or nobel. Be wary of that attitude -- I know I would not be able to live with myself.

[melissel]

Lots of Mothering.com mamas (where I also hang out) have done it, so I've read lots of stories. It is definitely tempting and I totally support it, but I don't think I could do it myself. (I would have a homebirth if my insurance supported it, but maybe that's because we have excellent midwives in the general area.) I think only you can decide where your comfort level is and whether it's an option for you.

 

If you go hang out in the due date club and birthing sections of MDC, you'll get lots of support and can chat with others who've done it.

[Sue G in PA]

I'm already nervous b/c my midwife lives an hour away! But, I have the birth tub and plan to deliver in water. So, that is pretty unasisted. My midwife will just be there if there are any complications. My second stage is usually a bit "hairy". Difficulties getting the baby out so we're hoping water will help. Anyway...I've known a few women who had unassisted births...just b/c the midwife didn't make it on time!

[~Tara~]

#2 was half born before the midwife arrived

#3 was born a good 10 min. before midwife arrived

#5 was a completely planned unassisted - loved it! heck, my hubs was barely even there LOL He was getting supper for the kids (delivery pizza). Things just happen quickly in my births. I zipped through transition and was ready to push before he could answer the door and throw pizza at the kids. LOL

 

We just realized that those other instances of the midwife not making it..didn't hinder us one bit. We were confident and educated in the birthing process. With #5 we were ready to just go it alone. I also noticed that my labor slowed down a bit again with #4, with a midwife present. She was the same midwife I had for the previous 2 pregnancies. Great gal! Love her. But I guess my body just did well with just me and hub. Even though she was wonderful and hands off during #4's labor, I think I felt a bit inhibited with her present. Not horribly so, I mean, it was still just a 6 hr labor. But I had a 3 hr labor prior and then my #5 unassisted was also a mere 3hr. I can't help but make a connection. ;)

 

If you're genuinely interested in doing such...just read. Read read read. Just as you should for ANY birth. As you should for a home birth in general, educate yourself on the birthing process and the body's natural ability to do so. It's an awesome experience that I would not trade for the world. And I will continue to have my babies at home, unassisted, so long as I feel we are both safe to do so.

[Sue G in PA]

I had a dream early on in my pregnancy that I went into labor mid-afternoon and it went so quickly that I was ready to push and dh wasn't home yet, midwife wasn't here. It was only me and the kids! In my dream, my dd11 actually helped deliver the baby, who came before dh OR the midwife! Now, I"m hoping that doesn't happen...sure want my dh to be here. BUT...my midwife laughed and said she wouldn't mind if she "missed" it!

[ELaurie]

but we didn't exactly plan it that way ;)

 

It was a planned home birth; our doctor, who was still able to attend home births at the time (drat those insurance companies - he can no longer do so without losing his malpractice coverage) was on the way.

 

Our midwife had just called to ask for directions when

I informed dh that our dc was on his way into the world at that moment, and he put me on the speaker phone!

 

Our very astute and experienced midwife provided a bit of gentle guidance, and a moment later our ds was in my arms.

 

We called the doctor back, and told him not to run any red lights on the way to our house :)

 

It was a wonderful experience, and I still smile everytime I think of it.

 

Of course, ymmv ;)

[Guest sarathan]

Our 2nd ds was unassisted, but we didn't plan it that way. We had planned to have a homebirth with a midwife, but my labor went so fast, she just didn't make it in time. :)

 

Wow, what an experience!! My dh delivered our ds, it was truly amazing. I remember right after he was born, dh put him on my stomach and it was just the three of us....so special. At the time it seemed a little scary since we didn't plan for it, but I wouldn't change it for the world! :)

[mommylaw]

I'm interested in learning more about unassisted births. I've just completed my OB rotation in nursing school. I can't say much about my experiences, but I was incredibly disappointed in many of their standard practices. For example, all women were encouraged to stay in bed, 87% had epidurals- it was assumed that everyone would need one and those who tried natural births were met with an eye roll attitude.

 

The women in your links are amazing. I don't think it's wise, however, to attempt an unassisted VBAC. :001_huh: The risks are just too high IMO.

 

After witnessing a CRASH section and newborn intubation on a mom that had a "very easy" pregnancy and labor, I don't think I'd ever have an unassisted birth. I'd probably strongly encourage my sister and friends to at least have a doppler and midwife present. But again, that's just MHO. :)

 

Anyhow, thanks for the information it's peeked my curiosity.

 

On a related note, have you done any research on early vs late cord clamping? My textbook states that late clamping leads to polycythemia and increased risks of clots. I haven't found anything to back that up. It just seems so unnatural to clamp the cord within 20 seconds. :confused1:

[Kate CA]

As a strong home birth advocate I have to be very honest and say that there is no way I would do that. There are just too many things that *can* happen. When we first began our home birth journey we had to seriously ask ourselves if we could *live* with the choice we made if something was to happen to our baby--and this was with a midwife. Are you willing to risk a serious complication and not be able to help yourself? I mean you *are* in a pretty precarious place during birth. :)

 

We had midwives because they were trained to do what they do - they were trained to spot anything abnormal. I used my midwives with every birth and was darn glad they were there. Not because I had emergency situations per se, but because they were an unaffected party there to help and assist in a multitude of ways. My dh would not have known what to do in lots of situations. A dear friend of mine tore internally and had to be sown by the midwife.

 

Sometimes it is just that intuition that a midwife has to help us along or to enable us to keep the focus and not get lost in the pain. Birthing at home is *painful* and let no one tell you otherwise. LOL They were just so helpful in knowing if the baby was OK - it helped *me* to know that all was going well to know that the baby was doing fine. If the cord had been wrapped or the baby got stuck, they were there to help.

 

If my midwife had not been there with several of my labors we would have ended up in the hospital. They were integral to their births. I just *loved* their experience, their calm, their abilities--and the fact that *they* cleaned up! :)

 

Anyway, I highly encourage you to look into home birth, but not unassisted. I know that *I* could not live with myself if anything had ever happened to my baby that I knew I could prevent with quality help and care. Midwives are worth every cent.

[abbeyej]

...Midwives are worth every cent.

I just wanted to note that I did not choose a planned unassisted home birth for economic reasons and I would strongly discourage anyone to do so. Obviously I believe(d) there were many reasons to have an unassisted home birth, but it's not a decision that should be made in order to "save money". (Shudder) ... I'm sure that's not what you were implying, Kate, but it jumped out at me that someone might think that...

[Kate CA]

I just wanted to note that I did not choose a planned unassisted home birth for economic reasons and I would strongly discourage anyone to do so. Obviously I believe(d) there were many reasons to have an unassisted home birth, but it's not a decision that should be made in order to "save money". (Shudder) ... I'm sure that's not what you were implying, Kate, but it jumped out at me that someone might think that...

 

No, I have read your posts long enough to know that you don't do things without thinking about them. :) I wasn't implying you did it for economic reasons. Most folks I know don't have home births for that reason anyway as the cost mostly comes out of our pockets! I wasn't actually addressing your post, but only Karen. :)

[Lady Katherine]

I'm convinced I would have died with my third one if I hadn't had a midwife with me. (If not during, then soon afterwards.) As for smiling and laughing during childbirth.... I'm willing to take your word for it that it can happen, but I will NEVER understand it! :eek:

[Plucky]

I had an accidental unassisted birth. I gave birth 10 minutes after calling the midwife. Dh delivered. I considered having an unassisted next time but decided against it. If anything happened during the birth the state could come in and investigate my family and possibly take my kids away. So instead I did a very hands-off birth with my midwife. It was wonderful.

[Karen sn]

I'm interested in learning more about unassisted births. I've just completed my OB rotation in nursing school. I can't say much about my experiences, but I was incredibly disappointed in many of their standard practices. For example, all women were encouraged to stay in bed, 87% had epidurals- it was assumed that everyone would need one and those who tried natural births were met with an eye roll attitude.

 

The women in your links are amazing. I don't think it's wise, however, to attempt an unassisted VBAC. :001_huh: The risks are just too high IMO.

 

After witnessing a CRASH section and newborn intubation on a mom that had a "very easy" pregnancy and labor, I don't think I'd ever have an unassisted birth. I'd probably strongly encourage my sister and friends to at least have a doppler and midwife present. But again, that's just MHO. :)

 

Anyhow, thanks for the information it's peeked my curiosity.

 

On a related note, have you done any research on early vs late cord clamping? My textbook states that late clamping leads to polycythemia and increased risks of clots. I haven't found anything to back that up. It just seems so unnatural to clamp the cord within 20 seconds. :confused1:

 

 

My midwife did't cut the cord until it stopped beating.

Some babies take time taking that AMAZING first breath. It's so much work to open those alveoli. As long as the cord is beating the baby is receiving all the oxygen needed. 20 seconds is ridiculous unless there is a necessitating circumstance.

 

I have heard of women not ever cutting the cord. They let it dry and fall off still attached to the placenta. (Respect it - but gross....a nasty days old piece of flesh? However - I am actually eating mine so will cut it off but not until it stops beating.)

 

{I just reread that. I should explain - I mentioned to my midwife that I was going to eat my placenta. Helps with postpartum hormones. NEED THAT. And she mentioned placenta pills - they dry out your placenta put it in a pill. Easy to take.}

 

I honestly feel that every mother instinctively knows what's right for her kid. For some kids I bet it's healthy to leave the placenta on and for others not so good. Some kids need a vaccine - others don't. Peanut butter makes some kids pee the bed - others not so. Who knows why. So many circumstances and their varried results.

 

 

I'm just so excited to be carrying a baby in my belly.

[battlemaiden]

I thought some of you might find it just a little funny.

 

I've mentioned many times before that as a former L&D nurse I could never have a home birth, much less an unassisted birth.

 

My current pregnancy is being followed by military medicine that is hardly non-intervention friendly. As a matter of fact, I will have to fight hard for every non-intervention choice I insist on-I practically had to swing a bat at the residents last time I gave birth in this hospital. My doctor is a fantastic lady and I get along with her very well. We go to church together. Anyhow, she has a bumper sticker that reads, "Home Deliveries Are For Pizzas". :lol:

 

Please nobody be offended. You would have to know her to realize that she is hilarious and a gracious woman but she takes her job very seriously and like many other physicians she has seen "home births" go badly too many times with tragic consequences.

 

Not to discourage anybody else's personal decisions. But I had been meaning to post something about that bumper sticker since the first time I saw it. :D

 

Jo

[Remudamom]

I know a woman who got up in the middle of the night to visit the bathroom and had her baby. Right there. On. The. Floor.

[abbeyej]

... Anyhow, she has a bumper sticker that reads, "Home Deliveries Are For Pizzas". ...

 

I think dh said something like that after dd was born (or, rather, similar in words, though the meaning was quite different). ;) All his coworkers knew that dd had been born at home with just us, and most of them were young and pre-kids at that point. One of the guys asked him in awe, "So did you deliver the baby?!" Dh said, "You mean like a pizza? No, dude, I just watched." lol... Actually, he was a big help in many ways, but I caught my own baby, thankyouverymuch. Of course, another woman told me she had learned in some anthropology class that that was physically impossible for humans. I just blinked at her till she started laughing too. ;) (And yes, it's possible, but I can't imagine doing it while lying on one's back...)

[Barb_]

"Home Deliveries Are For Pizzas".

 

I beg to differ. Pizzas are for Home Deliveries...birthing is hungry business :D

 

Barb

[Kate in Arabia]

For example, all women were encouraged to stay in bed, 87% had epidurals- it was assumed that everyone would need one and those who tried natural births were met with an eye roll attitude.

 

I had my third child over here and the midwife couldn't believe I didn't want an epidural.. "But you're American!" Uh, yeah.. so do we have some kind of reputation as always wanting epidurals? lol

[Soph the vet]

Although my dc were each born in a hospital with my OB present (first dd the whole neonatal ICU team was present as she was having trouble), I go to "catch" all three of them. Once they were each out to the waist, I pulled them out the rest of the way and up onto my abdomen. I thought my OB was letting me do this because I had delivered so many foals and calves and puppies:lol: but then my two other friends had the same OB and I guess he just has all the moms do this! It was a great experience.

And in defense of epidurals, I honestly tried to go the first twelve hours of back labor with no drugs, when they finally coerced me into the epidural, my labor took off. I only waited an hour before getting an epi with #2 and when I found out I was pregnant with #3 I asked for one right then:smilielol5::smilielol5::smilielol5:

[Karen sn]

double post - sorry

[Karen sn]

We came within a hairsbreadth of having one with ds - the midwife was a few blocks away, but she got there about 5 or so minutes before ds was born.

 

If you ever want to discuss the pros and cons - let me know, we've given a lot of thought to it (and come down, very strongly, on the con side.). I know that isn't what you are asking for here, though. (If you want suggestions about making an attended birth a better experience, I have some thoughts on that too...)

 

... and b'shaah tovah, may all happen in a timely (healthy, joyful) manner!

 

ETA: Our first 4 were all (attended) homebirths; the twins were a hospital birth but only because the presenting baby was footling breech - otherwise they would have been homebirths as well.

 

Eliana - OK - I'd like your suggestions. Dear boyfriend needs the midwife there. Thanks

[Karen sn]

I thought some of you might find it just a little funny.

 

I've mentioned many times before that as a former L&D nurse I could never have a home birth, much less an unassisted birth.

 

My current pregnancy is being followed by military medicine that is hardly non-intervention friendly. As a matter of fact, I will have to fight hard for every non-intervention choice I insist on-I practically had to swing a bat at the residents last time I gave birth in this hospital. My doctor is a fantastic lady and I get along with her very well. We go to church together. Anyhow, she has a bumper sticker that reads, "Home Deliveries Are For Pizzas". :lol:

 

Please nobody be offended. You would have to know her to realize that she is hilarious and a gracious woman but she takes her job very seriously and like many other physicians she has seen "home births" go badly too many times with tragic consequences.

 

Not to discourage anybody else's personal decisions. But I had been meaning to post something about that bumper sticker since the first time I saw it. :D

 

Jo

 

What about all the hospital births that have tragic consequences? Plenty of people were born in a hospital and have cerebral palsy, are blind from the AB ointment to the eyes, were damaged with forcepts, etc.....

If I saw her in a parking lot - I'd be telling her that babies have been born at home and breastfed for THOUSANDS of years....pizza delivery is relatively new.

 

And no one needs to "deliver" me from anything.

 

Nothing snarky to you personally - just don't like it when doctors cause a problem, then cure it, and then say how lucky we are to have their intervention.

 

Let's face it - lying on your back slows blood supply to baby and feet in stirrups (or now a nurses hands) cause tearing. But a tear still heals quicker than an episiotomy cut - it would just take longer to sew a jagged tear than a neat slice so to save time they cut.

 

It's all about time and money in a hospital.

[camibami]

Nothing snarky to you personally - just don't like it when doctors cause a problem, then cure it, and then say how lucky we are to have their intervention

 

This has been my experience as well.

 

I know quite a few people who have a midwife present to listen to heartbeat every now and again, and thats pretty much it. She can be in another room than you and DH, even, but in the house "just in case".

 

Good luck to you, and congratulations!

[abbeyej]

I beg to differ. Pizzas are for Home Deliveries...birthing is hungry business :D

 

Ooh, so true! I was literally starved in the hospital, and since ds was born at 11:50pm, I couldn't get anything to eat till the next day (after two days of not being allowed to eat). We called for a pizza while driving home from the hospital!

 

When dd was born, one of the very first things I told dh to do was to call for Thai food! (And I ate Girl Scout cookies while I waited!)

[Mama Lynx]

For my homebirth, I had a midwife who was very happy to stay in the background and let us manage, unless she was needed. I like that setup best, for me.

 

I love the idea of catching my own baby, but my second stages tend to be short and intense, and I just can't cope at that point. I don't so much push as the baby comes flying out ;-). As it was, he came out so fast that no one caught him, poor thing. It was a waterbirth, and he slipped right past my husband's hands.

 

Baby #2 was very nearly born in the car.

 

I know I could do unassisted, but I think I would always like to have a midwife hanging around. Like Abbey, I was lucky enough to have an OB who knew I homebirthed, and to whom I could turn if necessary. How awesome is that? It's too bad that kind of setup can't be common.

[mittmaman]

I had three great uneventful pregnancies and all three times seriously contemplated an unassisted homebirth...and still sometimes wonder how it could have been...even more though, as all three times I ended up not needing any assistance during birth.

But each time during pregnancy came a point at which I wondered with what "I could live" if anything went wrong during birth because of choices I had made. We have been blessed with three healthy children, but I know, that if they had been sick or having any kind of problem I could have embraced them just the same - and accepting their, and our, destiny with much peace...

This I could never do, if their suffering was a consequence of my decision to do an (unassisted) home-birth...

But that is just me!!!

I envie any woman who experiences a successfull unassisted birth more that I can say...I personally just couldn't dare because I literally couldn't live with anything going wrong...

This being said, I had picture-book hospital births, with all the "state-of-the-art" equipment available, with TWO doctors, TWO midwives and a nurse quitely standing in a corner of the very big room...and not doing a thing!

I could not dream of any medical professional having more respect for the wonder of birth than those five people...!

So, yes, my birth was unassisted. And never will I forget the moment I picked up my child - me being the first one to touch him/her.

 

I am aware that my experience is not representative of hospital-births in general. But reading through the posts in this thread makes me wonder whether we should not push for yet ANOTHER alternative in birthing - something between the non-assisted successfull homebirth (most of us probably secretly dream of - again, I certainly do!) and the fully medicalized hospital birth which seems to be the norm for most...