For those of you whom had a child(ren) in public school...

[Mom2J112903]

do you keep in touch with your child(ren)'s friends now that they are homeschooled :confused:

 

J is thrilled about homeschooling and can't wait to "have school at home", and yet at the same time he asks me about his "old friends" and how much he and they will miss one another. J has made some serious friendships in his two years at his school. Granted most of them are from this year, yet you would think these children have known each other since birth!

 

When I think about it, J can actually have more quality time with his "old" friends than they currently do. Sure they are together thru the day, but they are at school. We can do playdates, see them after school on the playground, things like this.

 

I do not want my child losing frienships, but I am worried that not being a part of the "school family" will hurt him.

 

Yeah, I am most likely over-thinking things. This is what I get for watching these kiddos at a field trip at a local park for 4hrs yesterday. Wow the friendships that have became!

Edited May 8, 2010 by Mom2J112903
changed title

[amsunshine]

Yes, my dds have kept in touch with their old friends. However, their best friends were and still are their friends from their extracurricular activities, i.e., dance. Also, one of their best friends wasn't even attending the same public elementary school when they were in ps, and they are still good friends. I've found that hs has broadened their friendship horizons as they have maintained the stronger friendships they made prior to hs and made new hs friends after leaving ps.

[Maddysmom26]

My Daughter is still in Public school finishing 4th grade. So she has friends that shes had since K and its a fairly small school so they are close group for the most part. There are a few girls that she talks about and wonders if she will see after next year. But I try not to make a big issue of it. I tell her that she has their phone numbers, emails and will most likely play some sports with a few and she can have play dates. I think that it will fine.. she may continue with a few but there are some that I will be happy to be rid of and obviously this is one of the reasons for pulling her from PS. I think as long as the child is excited to homeschool (which your child sounds just as thrilled and excited as mine) then I think it will be fine. I Figure that there will be opportunity in new activities to meet new friends also. ;) Its kind of like friends fade in and out of your life right? when you change jobs or move etc..

[WeeBeaks]

My DS has non-homeschooled friends in the neighborhood. Their parents probably think we are a little odd (I know one does) but the kids play together just fine. Friends are friends. :)

[Peela]

I was a gradual changover for my kids. They kept in contact wit their school friends for a while (playdates, sleepover parties), and at the same time, made new homeschooling friends. Eventually the schooled friends dropped off and the homeschooled friends became the primary ones.

It was hardest for dd. SHe didnt want to homeschool and so held onto her school friends strongly. But at a sleepover party of her best friend from school, they were shown a horror movie, and when dd- then age9- showed fear, the other girls ridiculed her. She came home traumatised and ready to let go of them all. It cut the cord. But...we knew they werent good friends- she just needed to see that for herself.

Nowadays both kids come across their old school friends now and then and its a good connection.

Ds plays with kids in the street- private school kids whose school friends dont live close. Its a great situation.

[Chris in VA]

Dd didn't really make any new friends last year in public school. She did talk with a slightly older girl a lot on the bus, but that girl moved--they were penpals for about 4 months.

 

She does have friends at church, tho--two are sweet girls that happen to be in the same class. When we had a sleepover, dd invited those girls. It was interesting to see them all remember they don't share some common experiences.

 

I agree that childhood friends from early school years often separate a little in middle school--and yes, you have to make an effort to see friends when you are no longer in the same environment 6 or 7 hours a day.

[i.love.lucy]

My dd continued in her Girl Scout troop after I pulled her mid-third grade, and this year in 4th. But it was this year that things got a little ugly...cliques, meanies, ignoring, etc. Eh, it's a group of 11 9-year olds! But I don't want to subject her to that anymore, so we are not continuing this next year. But she will continue her friendship with one girl that she's known since K. The mom and I are committed to keeping that relationship going.

 

Her other best friend is one that started as a family friendship and the girls grew together. She's known her since 4 years old. She goes to private school so their schedules are not too compatible in the school year, but will be this summer. That's another one that I will strive to continue with.

 

Other than that she's getting to be friends with a few in our homeschool world, but it's been a little hard. I have found most of the moms to no be as willing to work hard on making sure they show up consistently enough to things to make friendships happen.

[Lovin Learnin]

We are bringing our youngest home at the end of this year to hs 4th grade in the fall. The one thing she is afraid of is losing her friends. I promised we will make an effort to keep those friendships so I bought her an address book and she has been recording phone numbers.

[lionfamily1999]

When I was between 2nd and 3rd grade we moved from Northern VA down to here. I kept in touch with my friends for about as long as ds (started hsing mid 2nd grade) kept in touch with his. There were two other families that made the same move at roughly the same time as we did. I was friends with their kids and we ended up transferring to the same school, but our friendships dwindled even there.

 

Here, there are two school systems (the county and the town). I knew people that transferred between the two systems and lost friends. They didn't move, still lived within walking distance, but the difference of their daily lives in school was enough to break down some friendships. We stayed friends, but we ended up with my friends and their friends, iykwIm.

 

Ds has a few chums that live nearby, but their friendships have dwindled, they just don't have much in common at this point. However, the friends he's had in Cub Scouts have continued to be his friends. As well as one particular boy from school. He's made new friendships to replace the ones he grew out of.

 

All that to say, hsing isn't the only thing that causes distances and lost friendships. It's a normal part of growing up, changing interests, &tc. It's also a normal part of changing schools. :grouphug: So, don't worry yourself too much. Some friendships last and others don't :shrug: that's just, imo, how it goes.

[cathmom]

My oldest did K and 1st in public school, and had a few friends he wanted to continue seeing after we began homeschooling. Their families were not at all interested. They would not return calls. We were out of the loop - we had chosen to leave the school they had their kids in, and it seemed as though they took it personally. Oh well, c'est la vie.

[rwjx2khsmj]

Tonight, two of my four children have friends sleeping over. All three of the friends staying the night became friends with my children during their public school time. We've only been homeschooling a year and haven't really found a network within the homeschool community that provides friends for the dc.

[simka2]

Yes with dd. The boys only did thru sports and the neiborhood. I do try to keep the involved in sports and other activities. :)

[Mom2J112903]

The school J currently attends is very small, it is K3-8th but only one class per grade and 22 kiddos max in each class. Well, minus the 1st Grade class which has 26-but they have two teachers at.all.times, just like in the K class.

 

J is loved by the whole school, he is "Mr Sunshine", so his principal told me to bring him in often so they could get their dose of sunshine :D

 

We only live 6 miles from our Parish School, so I promised J that we would go to the playground once/week (because we have other afternoon activities planned) and still go to School Mass on Friday mornings. He was very happy with that idea.

 

I will also take one or two friends with us to the parks around town. It will be interesting getting three boosters in my Accord though :tongue_smilie: He has two sets of twins in his class-and both sets are very good friends of his. Actually the one twin he asks for when he is sick or hurt-S has made such an impact on J this year, this is one friendship that we will work very hard to maintain.

 

There are really no children close to J's age in our neighboorhood-and they *all* attend the schools that are within walking distance of us.

 

The homeschooling group is small, but has children close to J's age :) There are two larger groups, one being a little over an hr away and another a little over 2hrs away. So I hope to be able to do things with these groups as well.

 

I just know how hard it was for me to change schools and leave the state-thankfully we are not leaving the state, yet. We do have long-term plans on moving, but that will not be for a few years, so we have time to plan ;)

 

J is a ladies man, most of his friends are the girls, so can't do sleep-overs ;) But like I said above, we can have playdates :D

[NanceXToo]

My daughter only had two or three school friends that she ever hung out with OUTSIDE of public school when she was there, anyway. On her last day of public school (third grade, right before I pulled her out to homeschool) I told her to make sure she got any phone numbers of kids she wanted to keep in touch with. She didn't come home with any. She said she "forgot."

 

But we already had the numbers of those few she hung out with, and she does still keep in touch with two of the three- and one of those two, she sees every week for Girl Scouts, too.

 

Most of the time she plays with kids on our block- my daughter is 9 and on our block are my twin nephews, who will be 7 next month, an 8 year old boy, and a 10 year old girl. (Plus my four year old son and my almost four year old nephew and a three year old girl who lives next door). They all play together.

 

And kids in our homeschool group, too, of course; our group has frequent outings and get-togethers.

[Dmmetler]

I'm concerned about this as well, since we'll be out of parochial school in 2 weeks and not going back. However, there's a big overlap between the kids in DD's school class now and her Sunday School class, so hopefully that will help to keep the friendships going-at least long enough for her to develop a new network of homeschool friends.