Should this bother me?

[Joker]

My dd, 9, is about to start her third session of Girls on the Run. It's a program for girls 8 - 12 and they train for 12 weeks and it ends with a 5k. They also talk about self-esteem, nutrition, etc. Her prior experiences have been at a local school but the coaches were not teachers and the girls were from several different areas. This time we had to switch locations due to schedules and all the coaches are teachers from that school and all the girls go to that school. They will be meeting in one of the classrooms to change clothes, have a snack and do their "lesson" part of the meeting before going outside to run. I'm not feeling very good about this. Would any of you be bothered or am I just being too sensitive about the situation?

[TwinMominTX]

What about it bothers you? Are they excluding your girls because everyone knows each other? Is the use of the classroom what bothers you?

[Jean in Newcastle]

I don't understand why this is bothersome. Unless she went to the meeting and found it to be run differently from the previous 2 sessions, I don't know why the location, the employment of the coaches or the school-choices of the girls should be an issue in and of themselves. Yes, there might be a potential for it to be "cliche-ish" but you don't really know until you try it. Is this a one-time scheduling change or will she be with this group from here on out?

[phathui5]

I don't really get it either. I understand wanting a mixed group, but I wouldn't care unless they're giving her a hard time about it.

[LibraryLover]

My hs'd teen runs x-country (3rd year) and track at the local high school. They always meet to train at the school , and in winter they run *in* the school. :001_huh:

[gingersmom]

My daughter's girls on the run experience was more like girls walk and talk.

 

It was run by a local mom (who was a runner) and it was awful.

 

It was held in our local park and it ended around 4:30. So just as it was beginning to get dark. The leader would wave goodbye and leave regardless of whether kids had been picked up or not. I actually waited and let kids use my cell phones to see where their parents were.

 

Hope you have a better experience.

[*********]

My dd, 9, is about to start her third session of Girls on the Run. It's a program for girls 8 - 12 and they train for 12 weeks and it ends with a 5k. They also talk about self-esteem, nutrition, etc. Her prior experiences have been at a local school but the coaches were not teachers and the girls were from several different areas. This time we had to switch locations due to schedules and all the coaches are teachers from that school and all the girls go to that school. They will be meeting in one of the classrooms to change clothes, have a snack and do their "lesson" part of the meeting before going outside to run. I'm not feeling very good about this. Would any of you be bothered or am I just being too sensitive about the situation?

 

Sorry FLmom, I'm with other posters; not quite sure what's bothering you. Is it that the coaches and teachers are all from the school? I guess I'd wait and see if that's a problem before I was 'bothered'. If your dd doesn't feel excluded, and no one gives you 'flack' for homeschooling, then no reason to be bothered, right? I say give it a chance, you might be pleasantly surprised. Then again, you may not be. :D No way to know unless you try...

[Joker]

I guess I'm just concerned she's going to feel like the odd guy out. I just received my first corresdpondence today which is how I found out everyone (all coaches and girls) but my dd is from that school. They already had a "team mom" (which we never had before) and had already designated other things/jobs that usually don't happen until after the girls first week. My concern is if I wait and see then I might not be able to switch her to another location that still had open spots now. After reading the responses I started to reallly think maybe I was just being too sensitive. I called dh and he doesn't want her there either - so I guess that's just how we are.:)

[*********]

I guess I'm just concerned she's going to feel like the odd guy out. I just received my first corresdpondence today which is how I found out everyone (all coaches and girls) but my dd is from that school. They already had a "team mom" (which we never had before) and had already designated other things/jobs that usually don't happen until after the girls first week. My concern is if I wait and see then I might not be able to switch her to another location that still had open spots now. After reading the responses I started to reallly think maybe I was just being too sensitive. I called dh and he doesn't want her there either - so I guess that's just how we are.:)

 

Hey, that's ok FLmom. You know, sometimes it's hard to communicate all the aspects of a sitation on an on-line forum. And hey, maybe it IS just that you and your dh are sensitive about this particular sitation. But you know what, so what? I mean, we all have our 'things', right?

 

Either way, I hope you find a group that's a good fit for your family. :001_smile:

[kalanamak]

Her prior experiences have been at a local school but the coaches were not teachers and the girls were from several different areas.

 

I would think a group where people knew each other would be safer....someone missing would stand out more, and the coaches had already shown themselves to be reliable and/or reasonable. I'd be happier with this situation.

[Joker]

I would think a group where people knew each other would be safer....someone missing would stand out more, and the coaches had already shown themselves to be reliable and/or reasonable. I'd be happier with this situation.

 

I don't know these coaches so I don't know if they are reliable or reasonable. The fact that they are teachers doesn't make it an automatic assumption for me (in my own personal experiences). I am a worrier when it comes to my kids but I never worried about their safety at Girls on the Run and I'm not worried about their safety in this situation. I just don't like the idea of all the coaches being teachers at this particular school and all the girls attending this school. My dd has always enjoyed this activity and we have never run into this problem before. It just hit me as something I was not comfortable doing.

[Tabrett]

I guess I'm just concerned she's going to feel like the odd guy out. I just received my first corresdpondence today which is how I found out everyone (all coaches and girls) but my dd is from that school. They already had a "team mom" (which we never had before) and had already designated other things/jobs that usually don't happen until after the girls first week. My concern is if I wait and see then I might not be able to switch her to another location that still had open spots now. After reading the responses I started to really think maybe I was just being too sensitive. I called dh and he doesn't want her there either - so I guess that's just how we are.:)

I agree with you. It is like you have already been left out and it is for "_____________ elementary school" children only. How else would these jobs already been give out? I like you old situation better; leaders and dc coming form diverse places. I think that allowed your dc to feel more accepted, because everyone was in the same "boat". I would try to find a more diverse group. Many elementary school teacher don't like home schoolers. They tend to think you believe they don't have the ability to educate your dc instead of you believing that hs'ing is just the best situation for your dc. I don't think high school coaches mind as much as elementary school teachers. High school and middle school coaches don't necessarily have to be a teacher at the school they coach. Many are only hired to coach and work a non-educational full time job.

Personally, I would try to find another group than potentialy feel left out.

[Joker]

I agree with you. It is like you have already been left out and it is for "_____________ elementary school" children only. How else would these jobs already been give out? I like you old situation better; leaders and dc coming form diverse places. I think that allowed your dc to feel more accepted, because everyone was in the same "boat". I would try to find a more diverse group. Many elementary school teacher don't like home schoolers. They tend to think you believe they don't have the ability to educate your dc instead of you believing that hs'ing is just the best situation for your dc. I don't think high school coaches mind as much as elementary school teachers. High school and middle school coaches don't necessarily have to be a teacher at the school they coach. Many are only hired to coach and work a non-educational full time job.

Personally, I would try to find another group than potentialy feel left out.

 

Thank you! :001_smile: I was beginning to think I was crazy for having reservations.

[Starr]

You are right you wouldn't know how cliquey (that word just doesn't look correct) it would be until you tried it. And that might be too late. Go with what feels best to you.

[kalanamak]

I don't know these coaches so I don't know if they are reliable or reasonable. The fact that they are teachers doesn't make it an automatic assumption for me (in my own personal experiences). I am a worrier when it comes to my kids but I never worried about their safety at Girls on the Run and I'm not worried about their safety in this situation. I just don't like the idea of all the coaches being teachers at this particular school and all the girls attending this school. My dd has always enjoyed this activity and we have never run into this problem before. It just hit me as something I was not comfortable doing.

 

Not sure why. I'd be more worried if there were a lot of people pulled from all over. I'm not saying teacher is an automatic assumption, but coaches you know from nothing, with kids from all over who know from nothing about these coaches or about each other just seems more of a recipe for something going wrong....like a pack of total strangers adult and child mixed together. Seems more ominous than the fact these people know each other. What is the concern? Exclusion? Brainwashing? Herd immunity?

[Tabrett]

Not sure why. I'd be more worried if there were a lot of people pulled from all over. I'm not saying teacher is an automatic assumption, but coaches you know from nothing, with kids from all over who know from nothing about these coaches or about each other just seems more of a recipe for something going wrong....like a pack of total strangers adult and child mixed together. Seems more ominous than the fact these people know each other. What is the concern? Exclusion? Brainwashing? Herd immunity?

I think her concern is she has already been left out. FLmom was not given the opportunity to have any jobs for the team. If the only people on or working with the team are at the same school, the coaching teachers could sent home fliers and make emergency announcements about changes over the intercom that would never be heard or seen by FLmom and dd unless one of the teachers remember to call her. "On, sorry! We sent home a new schedule with the kids at school" type of attitude.

[Joker]

Yes, I have a worry about exclusion - brainwashing and herd mentality, no. I don't think teachers are evil, but I think that all of her coaches being teachers from the same school and all of the other girls participating being from the same school are worrisome. We have already been excluded, via email, and I don't think it would change much. If this was our introduction to the program I may not have thought anything was wrong. This is our third time and this is not the norm, so I am concerned.

[mom4him]

I guess I'm just concerned she's going to feel like the odd guy out. I just received my first corresdpondence today which is how I found out everyone (all coaches and girls) but my dd is from that school. They already had a "team mom" (which we never had before) and had already designated other things/jobs that usually don't happen until after the girls first week. My concern is if I wait and see then I might not be able to switch her to another location that still had open spots now. After reading the responses I started to reallly think maybe I was just being too sensitive. I called dh and he doesn't want her there either - so I guess that's just how we are.:)

I think it would bother me. I think with a mixed group there would not be as much of a possibility of neg. hs influence. Plus almost all ps teachers that I have met seem to be anti hs.

[Michelle O. in MO]

Yes, I have a worry about exclusion - brainwashing and herd mentality, no. I don't think teachers are evil, but I think that all of her coaches being teachers from the same school and all of the other girls participating being from the same school are worrisome. We have already been excluded, via email, and I don't think it would change much. If this was our introduction to the program I may not have thought anything was wrong. This is our third time and this is not the norm, so I am concerned.

 

I agree with you. I think the girls at this age have formed their cliques at school. They pair up - no doubt about it. It's just the law of the jungle in public school. If the girls were from different schools and the coach was a "neutral" party, then I'd vote to try it out. But as it stands, I'd look for another option. I should add my 10yod attends GOTR at our local YMCA. Perhaps your local Y offers the same option?

[Joker]

I was able to get her switched to a different location. It is at another school but the girls are from different places and the coaches are not teachers - so I feel better. The closest Y that offers the program is about 45 min. away so the local schools are our only option. She has really enjoyed GOTR and we never have had any problems. This one situation just didn't feel right to me.