LinRTX Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 I was talking to my college-aged dd this weekend and thought I would share the tidbits of information she had to share with me about dorm life and homeschoolers. 1. HS do not understand that people need to experience the college life. Translation: Play music loudly, have boys in the room all night, and spend lots of time partying. 2. HS are too sheltered to understand that people did need to be able to do what makes them happy. Translation: Dorm roommates do not have to follow dorm rules or signed contracts. 3. HS are too naive to understand that if you pay for a room you can do anything you want in it. Question: What if I paid for it too and what you want is totally opposite what you want? (HS please see number 2--it will answeryour question.) 4. HS just don't understand that the dorm is not really for studying. Translation: see #1. Now I know what I must teach my junior to get her ready for college/dorm life. Why am I spending time on pre-calc, advanced biology, and American history? All I need to tell her is to do whatever anyone wants to make them happy and ignore all contracts. Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tabrett Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 Oh my! I attended public school and felt that way about my first roommate! It was horrid and I was to soft spoken to do anything about it! I would try to see if she could switch roommates! The stories I could tell! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hillfarm Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 I wasn't homeschooled when I went off to college, but was a rather naive farm girl. I think I spent my whole freshman year with my eyes big and round and my mouth hanging open. I just couldn't believe that people really lived like I had seen on television. I remember one of my biggest shocks being about a girl in our dorm who spent one night sick-drunk in the bathtub throwing up and who was out drinking again the next night. I couldn't imagine why she would willingly repeat the experience from the night before. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elegantlion Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 I wasn't homeschooled when I went off to college, but was a rather naive farm girl. I think I spent my whole freshman year with my eyes big and round and my mouth hanging open. I just couldn't believe that people really lived like I had seen on television. I remember one of my biggest shocks being about a girl in our dorm who spent one night sick-drunk in the bathtub throwing up and who was out drinking again the next night. I couldn't imagine why she would willingly repeat the experience from the night before. I'm sure she had no memory of said event and even wondered why she was in the tub. :lol::lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MistyJ Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 Can you request a "quiet dorm", where other, like-minded, studious kids want to live? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JVA Posted August 31, 2009 Share Posted August 31, 2009 Some colleges have specific dorms for the serious-minded and sign contracts for: no drinking, quiet hours, obeying the visiting hours, maintaining certain GPA...... it varies by campus. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gingersmom Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Things have not changed in the 25 years I last lived in a dorm. This is why most kids stay in a dorm for one year and then try to find a different living arrangement the next year. I think it is the luck of the draw. You never know what kind of person they are going to pair you with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shalom22 Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 My nephew's first year was an eye opener, He learned the hard way to know what a sock on the door knob meant...;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaik76 Posted September 1, 2009 Share Posted September 1, 2009 Things have not changed in the 25 years I last lived in a dorm. This is why most kids stay in a dorm for one year and then try to find a different living arrangement the next year. I think it is the luck of the draw. You never know what kind of person they are going to pair you with. Our college required we live on campus all four years. I was lucky to snag a great roommate my sophomore year and singles my junior and senior year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
macpuffins Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Having come from a somewhat sheltered life myself, I was shocked when I hit dorm my 3rd year university (I lived at home went to local university for 1st 2yrs). Being 2 years older than the standard 1st year dorm student was rough. My roomies were more mature too, 3 of us were 3rd year, and we had a freshman athlete who was either at practice or studying or sleeping. Our room worked well, but the other rooms in our wing were strictly freshmen! It was LOUD, smokey, and the hours were INSANE! We finally worked around the smokey issue (I ended up in the hospital w/ an asthma attack, so they could no longer smoke in the halls - this was before smoke-free dorms). The noise? Earplugs. You can get them in bulk at the local Acklands-Grainger (safety/work related wholesale place). One of the other girls we hung around with was also a 3rd year student in freshman living conditions, and she said her older sisters/brothers prepared her well: At home, they did the summer before as NOISY until 11pm, and quiet till 8am. They played music just a bit louder than they preferred all night long, and she learned to sleep/study through ANYTHING! It was tough on the family, but she said it was really worth it. When it is a roommate that is at issue, the dorm monitor/RA/proctor/whatever should be involved, and potentially a roommate switch is in order. This is something they are accustomed to dealing with every year, so it won't be like this request will shock them. The biggie for the student is to just remain calm and not inflame the situation w/ anger at the roommate. Sometimes things calm after a couple weeks, but other times it just continues till spring exams. *sigh* Just breathe, and let the student know that the rules are to be obeyed, and the one who's breaking them just hasn't learned that yet. Sometimes a few chats w/ the dorm monitor are sufficient to calm the situation to livable proportions, and other times they will just acquiesce to the switch of roomies. And sometimes, when it is significantly different, the quiet student gets a private room when one comes up!! (I did that partway through the year I mentioned above. All 4 of us did. Each to a quiet wing. It was bliss!) :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orthodox6 Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 These "eye openers" apply to more than homeschoolers. I was a 100% "publics product", yet was stunned when I matriculated at "Big Name U." and had to put up with everything listed. I was talking to my college-aged dd this weekend and thought I would share the tidbits of information she had to share with me about dorm life and homeschoolers. 1. HS do not understand that people need to experience the college life. Translation: Play music loudly, have boys in the room all night, and spend lots of time partying. 2. HS are too sheltered to understand that people did need to be able to do what makes them happy. Translation: Dorm roommates do not have to follow dorm rules or signed contracts. 3. HS are too naive to understand that if you pay for a room you can do anything you want in it. Question: What if I paid for it too and what you want is totally opposite what you want? (HS please see number 2--it will answeryour question.) 4. HS just don't understand that the dorm is not really for studying. Translation: see #1. Now I know what I must teach my junior to get her ready for college/dorm life. Why am I spending time on pre-calc, advanced biology, and American history? All I need to tell her is to do whatever anyone wants to make them happy and ignore all contracts. Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kmacnchs Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 These "eye openers" apply to more than homeschoolers. I was a 100% "publics product", yet was stunned when I matriculated at "Big Name U." and had to put up with everything listed. ditto I slept w/a fan next to my ear so I could get to sleep at 10pm (not 2am). I was annoying asking others to turn down their music "and no I won't go to the library, I study better at 'home'" I got some great classical music and played that on my headphones while I studied. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CalicoKat Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 Walgreens sells wonderful industrial-sized bottles of ear plugs. A sleeping face mask is also a definite must. I went to boarding school AND did the whole college dorm experience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gretchen in NJ Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 This drove me nuts when I was iin college and I went to public school.:001_huh: I really wish the college would enforce its own rules. Tsk tsk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinRTX Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 I know that this is not homeschool specific, but it is what one of her roommates is telling her. The other roommate -- the problem one is 27 years old. Why is she in the dorm if she wants so much freedom? Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keptwoman Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 27 years old and still in a college dorm? Good grief! I'm sorry for your DD Linda, this sounds very frustrating. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinRTX Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 She had a meeting with the dorm director and her other roommates just yesterday. The RA is the one who worked out the first agreement -- one they all had to sign. Her 27yo old roommate decided after signing the agreement that she did not like it after all and would talk to no on but the RD(director). The dirctor tried to get J to change because "they all have paid for the room, after all" I loved J's response. Here is a paraphrase, based on what she told me. We all paid for the policy and according to your policy the agreement signed by all the roommates is an enforcible policy. Everyone agreed and signed. Also according to your policy, all the roommates have to agree on having any guests in because this is supposed to be a place to study. I have read the policy. I have signed the agreement which we all talked about and agreed on. I am following the rules. The RD's response. "We will see how things are in another week." Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thescrappyhomeschooler Posted September 2, 2009 Share Posted September 2, 2009 This doesn't really have anything to do with your daughter's predicament, but it brought to mind my college boyfriend's experience. His freshman roommate was very odd and brought all kinds of weapons to the dorm. My boyfriend tried to ignore him and just carry on with his own business. Well, my bf woke up in the middle of the night around 1 month into the school year, and his roommate was leaning over him with a knife to his throat and told my bf that he(roommate) was going to kill bf and bf's whole family. Then he left the room. Bf told the RD about it, and was moved to a different dorm and had a single room from there after. Roommate denied everything, so was allowed to stay, but was expelled from school months later for setting a fire in the dorm lounge. I was fortunate to have good roommates. It really made the college experience enjoyable for me. I'm sorry your daughter hasn't had that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LinRTX Posted September 2, 2009 Author Share Posted September 2, 2009 She actually has been at a CC for two years and some technical school for a year and is still considered a sophmore. She told J she likes to party quite a lot. J studies and quite a bit. She is on scholarrship because she got a 4.0 at the CC she went to the last two years. But the two other roomates say she just doesn't understand college life.? They blame it on the fact she was homeschooled. I really meant the original post to be funny. I was so frustrated that I think that came through instead. It has been a hard few weeks. Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.