Oh okay. We actually do budget this way so I know our real percentages and it did not occur to me that this would be an example. Sorry.

I am not sure. It is just a non-copyrighted image. I should probably look in to it. Not look Inuit, you fool phone. I already look Inuit!

A tsuga is a tree. :)

It's a good thing. Not that my little one missed school and they are both exhausted or anything. Whatever. They will survive. I just think he could get a cheap ass room in this zip code. Multiple times I have offered to pay with the child support money so they could stay closer. "No, no, we're fine." Driving 1.5 hours to school is not fine!

Speaking of boundaries. My exh is a flipping moron and he will no longer have visitation during the school year unless his place of abode is within The school district. Because it is too hard for him to wrap his head around traffic. Him: "Can you believe the traffic at 8 am???" Me: well, you're out driving kids to school. What do you think other people are doing?" Him: "I don't know!" Insert banging head against brick wall smiley here.

I know. :hugs:

I feel much better then, lol!

8O More on taxes than on housing??? 50% tax rate but then 40% on housing? That deserves a spinoff. We are at 30% taxes including sales, 20% rent. Our rent is awesome though. If you pray, pray for my honest, decent landlord. Just that she gets every good thing that is coming to her. Seriously though Minnie--I am sorry!

We started before the teen years. Needs are always on us until you are 18 or graduated. Food (not junk), shelter, clothing (not bling). Always, until you move out. Oh, and we pay for a sport, an art, and a language. That's all inclusive. Full time students get free room and board. Good students get their loans co-signed. Besides that, when they want something we encourage them to ask for it on Christmas / birthday. If they want it now, they buy it. As their wants grow, so does their ability to earn. I'm thinking, it started with ice cream and pop lit and Pokemon cards, and moved to makeup and a go phone plan and a used phone, and now DSD is saving for a car. DSS is planning to get a phone plan. The needs/wants seems to be working for us. Funny... Generally I feel like not paying for a phone plan and a car makes me such a hard asterisk but in this thread, I'm the softie. I hope that means I'm a moderate!

No clue but hugs.

I am so impressed that someone never screwed this up until 10th grade. I feel your son is quite possibly one of the most responsible people I've ever read about. If he is so cautious and responsible not to forget or misplace lunch for 10 years, he probably will learn a lesson from this. Maybe if I had one more baby it would be normal and not forget lunch or snack two or three times a week every week for 44 weeks every year from kindergarten on. Maybe? Cheer up, OP. Sounds like you have a good one.

If she kills herself it won't be your fault. No. Matter. What. Nobody kills themselves because of other people. It's always from the inside.

Health insurance, among other expenses that are required to do my fair share, why I am not a homeowner. But I refuse to put my kids on benefits just so I can own property. Provided you have a cheap old car you own cash, are renting, and still do not qualify for subsidies nor do you have spare money to pay for health insurance (of course none of us have cable, media, no vacations, no camping, anything other than pay as you go phone plans), then I think you are truly in that gray area and should call the state to make an exception. Or you can join a health savings group. Worst case scenario, see what you can do for the kids. They may be eligible for benefits when you are not.

I looked it up and our family is definitely having shirred eggs this Saturday. Thank you!!!

I don't even know what that is! New egg style! Yay! I think over easy or basted with homemade hollandaise is the best.

I haven't heard it used in awhile. Upbraid, chew out, ream, those are what I hear orally more often. Perhaps it is not in vogue.

I use BA to introduce stuff and School to spiral. I imagine BA as the into and Singapore to spiral could also work.

Ugh. Talk about a nightmare. I think this will vary. :( I am sorry. Bio parents do retain some rights in some cases but I hope for your daughter's sake he will have to wait a long time. My dad did recover and now we have a good relationship.

Two $15/year. I used to do it myself but long story short, this is working better.

Though I'd offered to make dinner for his parents tonight at the house he was supposedly renting, he admitted it was like this old office space, I don't even know if the have a shower there, and if you can believe it, he said no place to cook. So I said let me take them out to dinner. So I spent my night with ex-in-laws at Old Country Buffet with ex MIL sighing about our divorce (she is actually very wonderful and deserves to be unhappy about the divorce and I don't blame her but ugh, the awkward, since obviously I'm not going to say anything about her son and just have to sit there knowing he probably rips me to shreds to them blaming me for everything UGH).

This has been a week of sacrifice. A week of patience. Ex-H didn't get DD1 to her programming club or DD2 to school, even. He refuses to wear glasses and misread the calendar. And then. AND THEN!

It has to do with my ex-in-laws and doing something for my kids.

Guess what I did tonight. Just guess.

Yes. Though, I can function if at least I have work. At least at work I'm my adult self and not someone totally consumed by pre-school aged desires. I had this problem in my marriage. A counselor gave me great advice (sadly my ex is kind of a narcissist so it didn't work but it would work with most people). She said that if I had trouble getting out of the house, then first, I needed to let go of some things. Like plan ahead that we will have a prepared dinner that night. The day I do my thing is the day we have pasta and marinara and salad from a bag. It doesn't have to be expensive or out but it has to be fast and foolproof so that even if the man or sitter doesn't get to it (totally understandable with four wee ones underfoot), then you can do it without resentment. The second thing is to plan it while the spouse is at work and hire a sitter or make plans to exchange with another mom. Do NOT wait for the workaholic / busy spouse to have free time. They will always bleed their activities into yours. No. Plan it and make a backup plan. Ensure you have foolproof childcare. Finally, remember that especially for short periods, little ones will benefit from being with others. I would suggest finding lower-cost activities for yourself, such as bubble bath at home and then going to a cafe and only ordering tea, and reading, and spending the self-care money on a sitter. Or a hike. It is hard to spend money on a sitter but in the long run sitters are less than psychiatrists.

I hope it's okay that I keep you in my thoughts. :grouphug: