I think she means more of the martyr, than (from what it seems) you. IOW, the person that makes a big deal and refuses gifts and then makes others feel bad because they like/enjoy/want gifts. I guess it's a balancing act, and from your other posts it seems we're in the same boat. We accept gifts, graciously, but PREFER not to recieve gifts, because of the pressure/acting/spot light/etc.

I understand now, not sure that everyone does, but I do (if it makes you feel any better, lmbo). She's a trip, love the scrunchy wink.

:lol:

Me too. The response we always got was, "I guess I should have done it myself." That was for everything. Now that Mom's older, she wonders why none of us will lift a finger in her house or yard. We still get Dad cups of coffee and things, but Mom's on her own. My brother finally told her, after years of being inadequate, we've all decided she deserves the best to be had, which can only come from her own two hands.

Okay, here's the deal. If you want people to do nice things for you, or go above and beyond for you, if you want them to do things without asking, then you need to be grateful when they do. Imagine your self in her position. You try, and in response you're told the task was incompletely or incorrectly done. How many times would you do this, if the response was the same? Perhaps, you should be more considerate in your reaction to what your dd does?

I had to explain to my son that he should never EVER EVER discuss a woman's weight or facial hair in public. There was a mom at school that looked remarkably similar to a man. For the longest time Drew would ask his friend if their dad was going to pick them up and when their mom showed up he would scowl and tell me they were liars. When I found out what was going on (he argued with the kids about whether or not she was their mom), I explained that some women DO grow facial hair and it is very cruel to point that out. Then I told him to ask himself if he thinks someone KNOWS about an issue with their body/face, before he decides to point it out to them.

I'm just trying to understand what you mean about being controlling and withholding. That's all. I do know people that refuse presents and lord it over the heads of the givers. They keep tallies, they know who owes them what, why, when and for how much. I know people that enjoy being hurt and forgotton, nursing that feeling in order to hold a grudge. Is that what you're talking about? Love your pic.

I accept gifts that are given to me and they are always a surprise. I just prefer NOT to have that moment when someone else's full attention is focused on me. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable. I do prefer to give, not because people have to bow down and slave for me all year round, but because I like the warm fuzzies I get from it. I think I understand where you're going with this, and just FYI, not everyone keeps a running tally of gifts given and favors owed. IOW, if you asked me what I got the various people who recieved presents from me last year, I would be hard pressed to remember any of them. If you asked me, when was the last time my neighbor or I did something for eachother and 'who's up' next, I couldn't tell you. I abhore tallies. I cannot stand it when a good deed is called up later, in exchange for a favor, and I despise gifts that come with strings attached.

Receiving gifts makes me feel uncomfortable. Especially if the gifts is a surprise (I was supposed to buy you something?). It's way too much attention for me, see hobbit hole (but I'm NOT off-putting). I guess I'm just a giver, lol. I like finding the right gift and enjoy watching people open it. It diverts attention away from me and that is a bonus.

Get a Charlie Brown Tree. IOW, find the lonliest saddest little tree in the lot and take it home. Then you can feel like you did your good deed ;)

We did Andrew's name first, too. We did all three names, upper and lower case for each. By the time we were done we'd gotton a good part of the alphabet already, lol. The only diff, was we did all the rest in upper case, and then the lower case alphabet. Next year, we're going to link lower with upper, work on it for a week or so and then just start having him do his copywork in cursive alone.

You know, it's funny, I really hated that smell when Grampa was alive, but since he died I find myself sniffing old men (jeez, that sounds so perverted). It makes me feel closer to him, though. My gramma smells like lavender. I have lavender candles, lotion, air fresheners and things. I use them, because it's like having her here, instead of Northern VA.

I still get that. Dh thinks it's adorable. If anyone knows, tell me, then tell me how to never get that again. Please, pretty pretty pretty please? Also, everytime I see your pic now, I automatically think, 'naughty list!'

I congregate with Christians all the time. Cub Scouts, family dinners, outings, now homeschool outings. I do not go to church, because I have not found one I am comfortable in. That does not keep me from discussing, talking, engaging, etc. My family, mother, father, brother, sil, bil, sister, all discuss/argue/talk/pray together. My gramma and I have incredible arguments and discussions over Christianity, the Bible and 'what it all means.' You don't need a building to congregate. You don't need to go to church to find God, or other Christians. Some people prefer that route, and good for them, they put together the Easter and Christmas pageants I enjoy so much. Other people, myself included, prefer a less 'established' system. Either way, God doesn't want you living under a rock. Isn't that the whole point? To get input, to gather, to remind and love and support? I'm no Scrooge, neither am I Tammi Faye (sp, sorry).

When my husband's grampa died, we both missed his smell. It was a sort of sickening sweet smell and one that I smell on random older people all the time. When I finally decided to clean out his room, I lifted the mattress and was overwhelmed by this wave of grampa-scent. Under his bed was a bottle of hair tonic that had a broken cap and been leaking, slowly, but surely, all this time. I had always associated that smell, and the wierd metallic, sour, flowery smell that some older women have, with age. It turns out that the smell I've found on older women was a type of perfume/cream/stuff. It comes in a tin case and looks almost like a balm. And the man smell was hair tonic.

Lol, bacon is meat candy.

Lol, I was trying to be all inclusive.

FYI, Claire Huxtable, June Cleaver and Roseanne were all TV characters. Do you love your kids? Do you answer the ever important questions they pose (Mom, what is a 'virgin')? Do you interact with them on a daily basis? Do you spy on them on their first dates, to make sure they're safe? Do you lie to them for their own good? Are you honest with them for their own good? Can you open and close the majority of doors in your home without sending a tidal wave of 'stuff' across the floor? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you're doing pretty well. Strive to be the best, but don't burn yourself out in the process. I never wear dresses. Never. I used to believe that, once I was married, I would live in long dresses and heels, dusting and baking with a gentle halo around my head. Then, I got married. My husband would rather hang out with me eating spaghetti for the umpteenth time than watch me slump, exhausted over a beautiful dinner.

So... you're saying I'm "off-putting." Lol...

They drive too slow. That is what I have against bus drivers. Thank you.

:lol::smilielol5:

I'm wondering if I'm off-putting too, now. Thanks ;) Really, I just get told I'm wierd a lot, or that I think too much (which, frankly, makes me want to beat people. What an idiot thing to say!?!). I do not have a plethora of friends, but it's more because people intimidate me, crowds make me nauseous, and I enjoy life here in my hobbit hole. The friends I do have are opposites. I have incredibly dumb, kind friends. Friends that are nearly illiterate, but would give you the shirt off their back. Then I have the ones that are super smart, cold and generally rub people the wrong way. Oddly, none of them ever argue with me or even questioned it when I took Drew out of school. They were all a little surprised, followed it up with a shrug, and said they figured Drew'd get a top knotch education. WTH? Am I off-putting?

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/618/01/ http://www.bedfordstmartins.com/literature/bedlit/glossary_a.htm http://www.unc.edu/depts/wcweb/handouts/literature.html These are all links we used in my American Lit. class this semester. The articles that will pop up are mostly on analyzing literature, but there's a lot of info on those sites. I would recommend a college lit. book, we used the "Concise Anthology of American Literature," only because they include historical info and everything before the stories. You could also check out a local community college and see if they offer online classes. As for Latin, order the stuff you plan on using with dc and use those to teach yourself. :)

Regarding the possible strike: Just be prepared to rebuild come Monday. And do a couple loads of laundrey. Oh, and the dishes, you know no one will do the dishes. You'll probably need to go grocery shopping too. Are you sure you want to go on strike?