My kids call MIL on the day, having already sent a gift package by mail the week prior. She lives out of state but has sometimes flown in for the holiday. She's not much appreciated by her living children or her husband; part of that is her general obnoxiousness and martyr complex (she's only happy if she's a martyr to her family), but since I don't have the years of dealing and living with it that her family does, it's easier for me to put up with. So I do. If she's not visiting us, her holiday involves her going to church (alone, not by choice), going to her own MIL's house for brunch (husband meets her there), and her living kids in residence showing up for dinner (expecting her to make it). Most years this dysfunction works for them, some years she flies out to us instead. We fold her into our plans, no problem. We've always lived near extended family, so it's a big gathering to celebrate all moms in our family. It starts with Mass, followed by a party afterwards around lunchtime. We hang out all day and well into the night. We love any excuse to gather and party :) the men BBQ and some years there is a bake-off for desserts. Even as many kids as I have, it still feels weird to me to be celebrated on this day when my own mother, grandmothers, aunties are still alive and so active in our lives; they're my primary focus. My own kids will give me cards or a token gift at home before Mass, but generally we just show up with gifts for Mom, Grandmom, and any aunties we feel like gifting (we each have a favorite LOL). I bring gifts for my sisters and SILs, even the ones who aren't mothers because "Auntie" is a big role in our family, too. Every woman in my family is a strong maternal, female presence in the lives of my kids and I want to recognize and appreciate that. To me the day is about MY mom, not about me. It's a day to recognize her, because even though she's no longer in the trenches (which, she kind of is because she still watches half of her grandkids on a daily basis) she's survived them LOL. If I saw the day as a way to relieve mothers, I can see where it'd feel more appropriate to shift focus to mothers in the trenches. But my mom would argue that she never left because her adult children have needed her just as much, if not more intensely, than have her small children! She says it's easier, the days when all it involved was checking homework and wiping butts. Reading about different family cultures is always interesting to me. We're a very matriarchial family, so our focus tends towards the highest-ranking moms :) I wouldn't have it any other way. This is typical of where I'm from.

I had no idea! Learned something today LOL.

Wow, you're on the ball! I'm still trying to figure out our last quarter for this school year. It started about a month ago, and we're just flying by the seats of our pants for now LOL. I haven't even begun to consider we have another school year on the horizon. Too overwhelming! Hope UPS is their usual good, timely selves :)

Mean? It might be, depending on the age or general disposition of your kids. If you were my mom, I'd have been fine with the idea but my sister would have felt hurt. Different personalities. I tend to think Mother's Day is more for the kids, and less for the moms - especially for the 13 and under set. I don't know that this reads (here) the way I mean it to; basically I think that it's a fabricated day that designed to "let" our children show appreciation for us. In their way. Especially when they're young. You know, the cliche breakfast in bed that we feign surprise at even though we've smelt it burning through the vents for the past hour ... the cheesy flower card that reads how their love G-r-o-w-s for us ... the award-winning acting job accepting our millionth hand-drawn picture showing us as a giant blob ... "the thought matters" type of thing. Blame Hallmark or whomever, but that's how I see the day. I'd feel badly asking my (younger) kids to let me spend the day alone. I think it's a great gift to request of my husband, taken any day other than actual Mother's Day. Maybe it's the Saturday before, or maybe the following weekend - it's an easy enough tradition to establish so that mom gets what she wants, with less likelihood of hurting the kids. In my house, my older kids always take the younger kids out on the day before Mother's Day. It's so I can cook and prepare the buffet for my own mom and grandmother, but it's so much easier to do without a bunch of kids underfoot LOL. That's the olders' gift to me; the day of the holiday, the youngers get to feel like they're honoring me. In time they'll mature and evolve away from cliche gifts to noticing things that will truly be a gift to me. Like a day off :)

There's always the Mentos in the Diet Coke bottle. It's quick, easy, and clean if you do it in the street or a parking lot LOL. We've done it in light rain, chilly weather. You're not outside for long :) Other than that, maybe things related to the senses - touch, taste, sound, smell, all while blindfolded. Have kids select random things from around the house or each bring a few things "smaller than a breadbox" from home (just don't tell them what it's for). Also, optical illusions. Card tricks, mind tricks, eye illusions (tons of printouts online). Things related to memory - playing a game of memory, then playing with radio on, then playing while singing Happy Birthday nonstop, then playing with others around you talking, etc. to get an idea of how the brain processes in isolation and then in chaos. Paper airplanes can offer a lot: lift, how design affects flying time and distances, there should be tons to Google. Bernouilli Effect is a good one, too. Similarly, parachute men. Have them make paper parachutes from a variety of products (coffee filters, regular paper, newspaper, foil, etc.) and rate times to determine air resistance. This is great if there's a balcony or second story. Get a $5 box of popsicle sticks from the craft store, some glue guns and duct tape. Let them build bridge structures, then see whose can hold the most weight. We used a series of small magnets and kept adding magnets until a bridge finally broke under the weight. There's the ol' mini-marshmallows and toothpick thing. Write out some molecules on index cards, shuffle, and pass around. Kids re-create the molecules, then tell the others what it is OR everyone makes H2O, etc. at the same time. This is easy even for kids without any chemistry background, with just a basic explanation. Disappearing ink. Eating wintogreens in the dark. Floating and density - fill a jar with equal amounts oil and water, add stuff (Legos, army men, pennies, rocks, etc.) to see what floats and what sinks. Or build a house of cards. Surely there's something scientific in that? LOL

Tomato soup or minestrone with a side of toasted french bread or grilled cheese sandwiches.

I'd need more background to reach a firm decision. How "formerly" is formerly? What/why the transition from homeschooling and desire to graduate with the homeschool group? Who is initiating the request - child or parent? What feedback are the homeschool graduates giving? I'm more of a "no one is getting hurt, it's no skin off my back" personality, so with reasonable answers to those questions I'd probably be fine with it. Precedent setting wouldn't concern me, as I think the group has a great policy currently in place: the group consensus on a case-by-case basis.

It's not a glamorous or well-paid job, but you could always become a flight attendant :) The airline my sister flies for is hiring, and everyone will soon be dual-qualified to work both domestic and international trips. Bonus, no degree necessary and life experience counts for something. There are plenty of 50+ new-hires in that job. It's what I'd suggest (any airline job with flight benefits and flex-scheduling, really) for someone desiring to travel while being paid. As an aside, my sister has taken several semesters off without penalty under an Educational Leave. She has advanced degrees, and initially expected to leave the airline once she earned her PhD but decided the lifestyle was too good to abandon. The job she would have left it for did require travel, but was much less flexible in terms of scheduling. She'd warn that you don't always get to see much of the world while on the clock, but with flexible scheduling you can take a span of days off in which to travel (if you're not tired of seeing the inside of an airplane and the airport, that is!) So you could conceivably do both! She and my daughter are going to Florence at the end of the month. They're both art buffs, and a year ago started a tradition of taking two art-related trips each year. She worked her schedule so that is was heavy at the beginning of the month, and they'll have two weeks of travel and touring at the end of the month. She says it's getting harder since flights are more full, but that it's still do-able enough that she stays at the job. She says that if she didn't use her flight benefits to the extent that she does, the job wouldn't be worth it to her.

Our Caribbean go-to is Providenciales in the Turks & Caicos. We've done Club Med and Beaches, neither of which we'd do if it were an anniversary kid-free trip ;) but we've been going there since the '90s and haven't really heard too many bad things about any of the resorts there. That's part of why we keep going back. The only thing that might be an issue is flights - from the DC area, it'd be a two-leg segment. It's one for us, too, and we go through Miami or JFK. If you want to do a fare search, the airport code for Providenciales is PLS. Way easier to type and re-type! Sounds exciting, hope you guys have fun!

I don't wake my kids. They're usually up before me anyway :) I'm all for letting kids sleep in and rest; I think sleep is super-important, especially to growing bodies. We're pretty laid-back about bedtimes, waketimes, school time, however that doesn't always work for each and every season of our lives. A few years ago I was working in Philadelphia, which was five time zones away from home, and flying back and forth every other week. By the second month, jetlag and exhaustion had contributed to insomnia on my days at home. I still had to get up and get work done, because the entire family's day depended on school having been completed, kwim? So I had to get strict with myself, and even if I couldn't sleep I had to force myself to - at minimum - rest. And even if I felt like sleeping until noon, I had to be sure to get out of bed by 9 so we could get our day going and done with. It's sort of the same for your daughter, now. Maybe kill the lights 30 minutes early and see if that gets her up 30 minutes earlier, so she does have time to do morning routine before school. Alternately, start school at 9 regardless of anything else; maybe some days it means she's doing it in her PJs, or delaying breakfast, or eating a modified breakfast like a muffin or fruit while studying, and chores get pushed to afternoon/playtime. She may not mind, I wouldn't have. She may mind, and you explain that you're open to (her) other ideas on how to best fit everything into her sleep schedule - and you mean it. My youngest is seven but the rest are a bit older. We still have siesta LOL. Mostly for me. Those at home will have quiet hour, for the teens I'm okay with computer time but my youngest does reading, coloring, sometimes napping. I sleep. Those at school are usually due home around the end of the siesta hour so we transition into tea/snack time. It's restful. I think rest is as important as is sleep, and four year olds in particular could still benefit from it. And so can parents of four year olds ;)

Be honest. Are the Billy bookcases really that great? I'm not really an IKEA fan. I'm not a fan of particleboard and MDF products. My current bookshelves are wood built-ins, made by my brother. I'm moving, and they're not coming with. He's offered to make new ones, but ... he's busy. And I'm impatient. He said it'd be a few weeks before he could get to it, but I can drive to IKEA and get these bad boy Billys put up this weekend. Oh, and I saw a blog project that used Billys as the basis for a built-in. Also thought about copying that idea so I can get the bookshelves up now (immediate gratification) but have the look of a built-in in three weeks (delayed gratification). But still wondering about the quality of the Billys ... what, if any, benefit to using Billys rather than just building a standard wood built-in. I'd be spending the same amount of money either way, and was wondering what others' experience was with Billy. Is he as great as people would have me believe? Is he worth delaying gratification for? Dish. If it matters, we're talking the equivalent of 6-8 bookshelves (Billy or wood) spread across two walls, either independently or as two separate built-ins each featuring 3-4 bookshelves (Billy or wood).

Gosh, it's way more than ok! You know the whole "lead a horse to water, can't make it drink" thing? There's no point trying to work through burnout (on both ends, no less) just for the sake of saying you've held to your previous schedule. If you're burned out, you're burned out ... you won't be learning much, and instead of guilt it'll be frustration you're dealing with. Not worth it. Lose the guilt, and give yourselves this chance to do the basics, re-charge, and be prepared to return to full steam next year. Really. This is the BTDT voice of experience talking. ETA: Also the voice of experience, be ready for a wee bit of a breaking in period when you go from low-key basics to full-steam academics. When we were ready to get back into full swing, I gradually reintroduced one subject each 2nd-3rd week rather than try to jump right back into all subjects, all day. It added about 3 weeks to the end of our school year but was definitely worth it. I'm convinced we'd have had those extra days anyhow due to early rebellion had I tried to go from relaxed to rigorous without an adjustment period.

As to something meaningful, what about a sponsored donation of some kind? Sponsor a baby drive (diapers, bottles, blankets, etc.) where any donation receives a small card of acknowledgment. The card goes to Mom, or another special woman, and rather than trinkets going home with the women of the congregation ... in honor of these women, real moms in need will get stuff they can actually use. People can purchase and directly donate an item OR they can make a cash donation which the church can then use to purchase baby items for donation. I love the idea of a luncheon/brunch though. And the best idea of all was giving moms the day off from volunteer church duties. Brilliant! FWIW, as a family we've always celebrated all women in our family on Mother's Day. I have aunts who became religious sisters and aunts who stayed unmarried to care for elder relatives -- none are official mothers, but have definitely played a significant role in our formation. Such is the nature of a large, close-knit family I think. There is the nicest lady at church who has taken a real liking to my daughter, and we've always acknowledged her on Mother's Day, too; I don't know (or care) if she's childless by choice or by desire, but she's a great role model and strong supporter of my kids and I like to show our appreciation for that. I get a lot of flack from my adult friends (ones I met as an adult who aren't from my culture) because they don't even like to share Mother's day with their own MILs or even moms sometime (!) ... and I've wondered if I wasn't being weird to include all of my non-moms. Reading these posts, I'm encouraged to continue honoring all of the important women in our lives. Thanks for the thread, OP!

I tend to feel more badly for the realtors. The ones I know will explain it until they're blue in the face ... and still their clients just don't/won't get it LOL. The HGTV brainwashing is just too deep!

Where in the room is this going? Like, will it be the first thing you see from bed in the morning? Is it over a dresser, to the side? Or ...? To me, that matters. I like to overthink these things, though ;)

Not for nothing, but Hooters girls transition great into admin jobs! Those skills she shared were poorly worded, but we've found them to be totally true. (Caveat: I'm not hiring for my husband - I'm all for making customers feel comfortable and relaxed ... a husband, not so much thankyou!) I love hiring former waitresses and bartenders. They've already spent time honing skills I can't as easily teach (the art of dealing with the public). I can teach anyone to do just about any other skill - especially office/admin work! I actually love those ads on Craigslist. I snag the best deals from poor spelling (dinning tables), and from ads which sit due to those of you who skip by the poor grammar and photos :) We're not all great at everything, and I can forgive anyone who will give me a good deal on something I want. Their "bad" ad saves me the hassle of humping around garage sales and thrift stores, looking and over-paying LOL.

I need one. I recently went from F/T to P/T work outside of the home, and now I have free time that I'm wasting away on the internet. Time to get more productive. But not too productive ;) What are your hobbies? I need inspiration. Time, money, and childcare are not issues - the only issue might be that I travel for work, so bonus points if it's something I can bring with me in some way, shape, or form (but not mandatory). I'm not creative, but I'm a great mimic. I'm athletic and currently play in an adult soccer league. I'm feeling a void that I'm not sure how to fill. I was going to write the next, great American novel ... but, well, everytime I sat at Starbucks to compose it I always got sidetracked by the other patrons and ended up just gossiping and arguing local politics instead. So that's a no-go LOL.

I tried to give up my nickname (it's Gidge, btw), but it didn't go over well. Not because my family minded, it was just too ingrained in their minds and mouths :) They kept forgetting, and I finally realized I'd be Gidge til I died. FTW B)

True love is two of my sons, who more than six months ago had planned an end-of-school-year campout with friends, playing an endless round of rock-paper-scissors to determine which one of them GETS to stay home that weekend to accompany their baby sister to a Father-Daughter event sponsored by her AHG troop. She's the only girl in her small troop whose Dad isn't here for these functions. She went from sad she wasn't going to get to go, to giggling insatiably as she watched her brothers "fight" over which one won the "prize" of being her escort. I wouldn't be surprised if she ends up bringing them both :)

You're in good hands, either way ;) Good luck with your new work project, and here's hoping the retirements come through for you!

I'm not particularly sentimental, but I have a soft spot for the important females in my life. I'd ditch the china. If not donated, then sell it on Craigslist to buy more Corelle or any other service items you'll actually love and use when you're hosting. Oops, re-read and see you're too lazy to sell. (Hey, my kind of lady!) Put it out on your curb, donate it, or see if anyone you know has a young girl who might enjoy it as a tea set. My daughter's tea set was gifted to her by a woman my brother works with, who was in your situation LOL. She loves it. But I'd keep grandma's gift. It might be useless now, but maybe not later. (Maybe you can use the sugar bowl in the bathroom to hold cotton balls, and the creamer as a small vase, e.g.) But even if it never earns its keep in your collection, it is allowed to stay because it makes you smile. A horde of useless things is a problem; one or two, even to the anti-sentimental, is forgiveable.

El Jefe, of course!

There were a lot of us kids, I think we forced it on her LOL. I remember when the whole Tiger Mom thing was in the news, and some of my brothers and sisters and I were sitting around discussing the controversy ... Mom was sitting in the room, doing her crossword puzzle, kinda just blending in the background, when all of a sudden she stood up, said "Dat woman? Amateur!" and walked out of the room. Cracked us all up. She's hilarious, my mom. I love her! I just told my kids that the next time they whine, I'm taking advice from here and giving them extra chores. Then I paused and waited expectantly for the whine ... but those little buggers are too sharp. They didn't fall for it! I guess I'm stuck doing dishes tonight, myself. Dang it.

Poor Autumn :( When you talked to her about it, did you let her know you'd be contacting the girl's mom? Did she share an opinion on that plan? I think it might be over-stepping if she wanted to drop the issue, and move on (with your support, guidance, and intuition into the situation but not further involving the other parties. At least while it was still raw). If I were the girl's mom, I'd want to know also. But I think I'd understand if your first loyalty was to your daughter, and if you needed to wait a bit before bringing this to my attention out of respect for her. I've only had boys that age, my only daughter is still younger, but the girls we know around here can be BRUTAL. So hateful you wonder how someone so young can be so ugly inside. It's sick and sad, both. But I can tell you that while the mother might be truly sorry that this happened, involving her has the potential to make things more difficult for your daughter. I'd guess the mom will restrict or confiscate the mean girl's electronics, but the memory of a girl "wronged" (and the mean girl will feel wronged by what she perceives as Autumn tattling - either to you OR to her own mom) can outlast any restriction. And where there's a will, there's a way, confiscated electronics be damned. Your daughter is lucky to have you helping her through this, and even if you did mis-step she'll come to realize that you did it out of love and concern. Who can stay upset at that? The other mom realizes it, too, and doesn't think you've overstepped any bounds, so I hope tomorrow's conversation with her is productive ... and that her little apple was just briefly rotten and will roll back closer to the tree once this incident is resolved. These two girls have two great moms. You're doing what you need to do, Mama.

My mom, too! So mean, weren't they!! I swore I'd NEVER say that to my own kids when I had them. She laughed, back then when I made that claim and then the first time she heard me say it to my kids. I ought to squirt her with the water bottle a la Zoobie's post LOL. Her solution for the whining was to send us down to the church for Adoration and private prayer. She said she didn't mind if we whined, but all complaints should be taken up with her Superior. She'd say, in her wretched accented Engrish, "Go 'head, you tell that guy {on the crucifix} how rough you have it, k?" Some of us got to know the Sisters and Priest very well those years B) LOL. I just had a heart to heart with my kids. It's a logic problem, really, here's how to solve it: You whining or bickering + my ears = understand how moms in the wild can eat their young Your normal voice bringing a complaint + my ears = conversation. Conversation, good; Whining, not good. Even if I wanted to give attention to you, when you're whining I literally cannot. I cannot focus on what you're saying because your tone has got up my hackles and I'm just so instantly annoyed that my annoyance is all I can focus on. Think about it. (This is how I explain it to my 7 year old, and have since she was about 5. The three year old? Maybe not so much, good luck with that one!)