Ugh. There are stereotypes EVERYWHERE. Okay, I have done both. I homeschooled my kids for 10 years. Then I sent them into public school for high school for the last 2 years. They have NOT been divided from us AT ALL. And they have not come home wearing any enemy uniforms. They have cellphones and facebook and twitter. They text. A lot. None of those things have changed how close we are. It's the parents. And how you raise them. Whether you homeschool them or public school them you still have an influence on them. And how you do THAT job will supersede any thing else. They go to parties and dances and go on dates. And they also hang with my husband and I and watch "Lost" with us. (we are on Season 4 and are completely addicted!) My older daughter is spending today touring a college with my husband and then going out for lunch in the city. She probably will go out with her friends tonight. And tomorrow we are scheduled to go to the mall together, just her and I, to shop for her prom dress. We did it last year and had so much fun that she asked again. Then she will probably go out with her friends again tomorrow night. I have know homeschool kids who are lazy, disrespectful little hellions. It's the parents and not the homeschooling that made them that way. I know Christian families who raise kids that are ignorant and prejudiced and who aren't doing any of us any favors by releasing them into society. It's the parents and not the Christian faith that made them that way. I know public school kids who are left to fend for themselves every day and get lost in drinking and drugs to escape their lousy lives. It's the parents and not the public school that made them that way. Pick what works for you and your family. And then do it well. And your kids will be fine.

I am sorry you are going thru this. Don't beat yourself up for being honest about what you can or cannot handle. It is not an easy situation you are facing if they do move in. Think of it this way: would it be best for THEM to move in? Perhaps not. Maybe they would not get the quiet and rest they need with young children around. Maybe they would need more privacy. So many times we hear about selfless people who take in and care for family members, or see depictions of it on T.V. (I'm thinking the Waltons) and it all sounds so nice and heartfelt. But maybe that is because it worked for their personality, lifestyle, home set-up, and abilities. If that doesn't work for you on some or all of those levels, then staying with you might not be in their best interest too. I know that personally I would have a hard time with it. And you are not a bad person if you feel you cannot handle it.

I would go with the 11 hours. Worst case if it needs another hour your husband can eat at 7:00 instead of 6 :)

How awful. Praying for you all. :grouphug:

Thank you! I am hoping that the doctor is willing to do it on Monday. Sometimes they want to wait for a year before they will work on a scar. 6 weeks would be perfect timing!!! I hope this works out for her.

My 16 year old daughter had a mole removed from her cheek in November 2010. Unfortunately the incision opened up after the stitches were removed, resulting in a wide, indented scar about 3/4" long. It is very obvious because of the indent, and makeup doesn't really help conceal it. She is extremely self-conscious about it, and it just doesn't seem to be getting much better. I do not think it will fill in on it's own. After having this for all this time she is really really sick of dealing with it. She doesn't wear her hair pulled back like she used to and is always worrying that everyone can see it. I am taking her to see a plastic surgeon on Monday (April 11th). I have a feeling that the fix for this will be re-incising the scar and stitching it back together. She is attending her Junior prom on May 20th. I am thinking that if he recommends re-incision of the scar we should still go ahead at this point instead of waiting until after the prom. I think a straight scar that looks like a line is much easier to conceal than an actual indentation in her face. Does anyone have any advice on how noticeable a scar from stitches looks after a month and a half? Please send good thoughts that the doctor will be able to treat this and if she does go ahead with the incision that the fix will be easy and heal quickly.

nvm

Sounds like my youngest daughter (who is now 14 and still shows some traits like that. It is just part of their personality.) When she was young though, boy oh boy could she pitch a fit. And stubborn as the day was long. She would take me on in a heartbeat. The thing that finally had us turning a corner with all of that was this: one time, after a particularly defiant stand against me was finally squashed (she was about 4 at the time) I said to her "You need to understand something. I will go toe to toe with you anytime, anywhere, and for as long as you want. I WILL outlast you. And I will win every single time." I could actually see this concept dawn on her. The defiance did not go away overnight to be sure, but she was better. And we worked from there. I am sure a lot of child experts would tell me that was a terrible thing to say. Something about her self esteem and independence blah blah blah. All I knew was that she was turning into a unpleasant child to be around. How was that going to help her self esteem? Just be consistent. And make it count. When they see that they will not win no matter how tired or how public of a place or how long they go, they will alter their behavior

praying :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

My daughters are now 16 and 14, but when they were young they went through the "mine" stage too. I had ZERO patience for it. Ugh. The bickering! Plus I knew that selfishness was not something that I wanted tolerated. So, I adopted this plan: Anytime they fought over a toy, as soon as they started, I would say very calmly "Oh, is there a toy in this house that is making you unhappy? I don't want that. Here, let me take it." And then I WOULD TAKE IT. This is the key. Take the toy immediately. Everytime. With no fanfare. Just take it. I wouldn't get into who had it first and what the actual problem was. You get sucked into too much detail with that. They needed to learn that sharing is a two way street, whether it is waiting your turn if someone has it first or sharing the toy even though you had it first. I never tried to figure out if the problem was in the asking or the refusal to share. I just shut the situation down. I would simply put it away for a while where no one would play with it. It got to the point where as soon as they started bickering all I had to do was say "Is someone unhappy with a toy?" and they would stop immediately. They would wait a beat while trying to figure a way around it, and then come up with an equitable plan. I have to say it worked like a charm.

If you want to hear a truly amazing song from her, with an ending that always gives me goosebumps, listen to "Piece of Sky" from Yentl.

:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:

We will be having a French exchange student staying with us for 2 weeks in March. We've never done anything like this before so I am looking for any advice as to what to do and especially what NOT to do as far as making him comfortable and welcome here. He is coming with a group of about 6 or so other students, and I have already been in touch with another family about setting up some outings with them. There is plenty for us to take him to for sight-seeing stuff around here, and he will only be here thru 2 weekends (the rest of the time he will be going to school with my daughter and doing that type of stuff). He is 17 and my daughter is 16. Any advice from someone who has been there/done that would be appreciated! You know, what you wish you didn't do, what helped you out the most, etc. I am trying to be zen about this and focusing on the experience this will bring, but I just want to make sure I don't drive him or myself crazy!

I would vote no, only because you are new to homeschooling. I think it takes a while to get into the groove of what works for your family and to get a feel as to which curriculums will work best for you. You will spend a lot of money to get there and probably a lot of money at the convention, and there is a high probability the curriculum you buy will not be the curriculum you end up with. I know if I went to a homeschool convention when I was starting out I probably would have spent a ton of money and ended up using less than a quarter of it. Curriculums all look great and wonderful until you get them home and actually start to implement them. I would wait until you have a little more experience so you can know what it is you want to buy

:grouphug:

My experience with the flu is that usually the fever is low and the body aches are high, no cough or sore throat. A good way I had it described to me once was this; Someone tells you there is a $100 bill out on your front law. If you had just a cold you would go and get it. If you had the flu not only would you not have the energy to get it, you wouldn't even care it was there.

I am thinking about installing an above ground pool with a deck built around it. Has anyone done this that can tell me about how much it would cost, and who would be good to use? Any advice? We already have a pretty large deck in the backyard that we could probably incorporate into the design. We just never use the backyard during the summer and I think it would be great for my kids. Realistically about how much am I looking at spending?

I am open to suggestions for other types of systems too. I guess I just "know" Wii because that is the one everyone seems to talk about. If there are other/better options please let me know!:)

We just decided as a family to go with one large gift this year (a Wii) than many small gifts, but I have no idea where to start. My daughters are 16 and 14 years old. We have a finished basement and almost every weekend my 16 y.o. has anywhere from 10 - 15 kids (boys and girls) over to hang out. I have a feeling my 14 y.o. isn't too far behind with that large of a crowd when she has friends over. Basically, tell me: - what is the best system to buy? - where is the best place to go for it? - what should I buy to go along with it? and - anything else I should know! Thanks for any help!!

I think I remember this with one of my daughters. Sometimes when they start to develop one side starts before the other. If you are concerned then you should call the pediatrician but I think you will find that that is probably what is happening.:)

We were pc users for years. In January we bought our first MAC and we will NEVER EVER EVER go back. I will gladly pay extra for a computer that: (a) works consistently. It has never given me a "system not responding" message. I can't tell you how many times I had to go into task manager and close down what I was doing on my p.c. (b) is fast. So much faster than pc's. Mac just ..... do what they are supposed to without all the drama of a p.c. © dont have to deal with viruses. (d) is so freakin user friendly! Trying to add a printer to our p.c. or install a software was an exercise in frustration for sure. I recently went back to work and have to work on a p.c. I can't stand it. We now have a MAC desktop, laptop and an IPad. If that makes me a sucker then so be it!

It can definitely be done, and done well. It just has to be the right set of circumstances. My daughter is on the varsity volleyball team. They either have practice (2:30 - 4:30) or a game (she doesn't get home until 8:30 at the earliest) every week day. She is taking all AP or honors classes. She is also studying for the SAT and will probably take it in November. She works a part time job. She works one night a week (5-10ish) and on Sundays, 11-4. The trick is that she LOVES what she does. She loves volleyball. When she comes home from practice she wants to go out in the backyard and play some more. She also loves her job. It is at the local pizza hangout that everyone goes to and she works with friends. The boss there has been great about adjusting her schedule to fit her volleyball schedule. It definitely helped that she has worked there for about 6 month and already was established there. I picked her up the other day from school to drive her to work and she told me we needed to stop at CVS first. Turns out she had broken her finger during practice. She still didn't stop practicing, and wasn't going to miss work either. She just wanted to get some tape to tape her fingers together so it might not hurt so much! That's how much she loves both. By the end of the week she is definitely tired, but when you love what you do it is a good tired, not a beat down "I can't do this anymore" tired. It has also helped her get very efficient with her schedule. You have to be very organized to get it all done. I think that will help her when she gets to college. Plus the season only goes until the end of October. I think that is key too. She is going to feel like she gained three more days to every week with all the time she gets back!

This is very true :001_smile: And if your daughter wants to go to high school, and the school is one that you are comfortable with, then it can be a very good thing for your family. I have posted before about our positive experience with putting my kids in school (I won't go into it again because the thread took some detours and eventually got deleted :tongue_smilie:) but just know that if it is right for your family, then going back to school can be just as positive an experience as any other choice you make when you know it is the right thing to do!

My two went back last year. It was hard to let go of what had defined me, and my family, for 8 years. And I can honestly say it took me a while to decompress and find a new path for myself. For so long I had thrown myself heart and soul into doing homeschooling. I had a harder time adjusting to not homeschooling then I thought I would, although I was always happy for my girls and they adjusted quite well. We have just started our second year of public school and now THAT seems like our norm. I guess that's just the way it goes! Oh, and I finally landed a job after months of looking. Being at home with no job and no homeschool responsibilities was making me crazy. I am going to work as an assistant at a law firm. The ONLY reason I got the interview was because one of the lawyers at the firm is also the attorney coach for my daughter's Mock Trial team at the high school. During my interview he said that anyone who could homeschool their child with such great results must have a great skill set under their hat. Very poetic ending to my homeschool journey!

It's in the news because sometimes the news is reported to inform us of facts we NEED to know, and sometimes the news is reported to start a dialogue around something that happened. This is the latter. My mother would have done this to my siblings and me when I was growing up. She would have said it was for all sorts of good, positive reasons when in reality she gets off on gruesome details and titillating facts. The more horrible the story, the more she will delight in telling people. And an adult would either stop her or be disgusted with her. A child can be manipulated AND she got the horrified reaction that she was looking for. She tries to do this with my kids and I stop her in her tracks every time. But if I walk out of the room for even a second I swear she will find a way to bring up some horrible detail from the Holocaust, or some animal torture story, or something equally as gruesome. Needless to say my kids have little contact with her.