It might be worth a call to the city to see if they have a code enforcement officer or someone else that handles the intel for rentals. It would be free to talk with someone like this and it would be a chance to gather some intel before contacting an attorney. Things I would want to know: 1. Is the property within rental compliance? As in, is it a legal rental and if so, what are the rules about rentals, occupation numbers, and parking? Our city has very detailed rules about this. You might find something that could help you. There is even a chance it is not a legal rental! 2. Ask how shared driveways are normally handled in disputes like this. Again, free "legal advice." They might not be able to solve your problem, but gathering a much info as possible will accelerate any discussion with a lawyer and possibly save you billed hours. 3. If the result of #2 is that it is actually illegal to park on the shared driveway, this might ultimately be a police issue. It might also be worth a chat with other neighbors in the neighborhood that also have shared driveways, if you know anyone. Or a realtor that is active in the area. Knowing what realtors are telling prospective buyers about shared driveway use could also clue you in to laws/ordinances that could help you.

This is our go to motel! The parking on site and low price is what draws us. And we don't mind a little gritty. Just do not leave anything valuable in your car and keep your eyes open....anywhere I'm Chicago.

I'm not arguing against that. Just pointing out that the solution is not simple and I can see why schools struggle to balance two issues.

People also have some control over how/when/where they use the bathroom, unlike a locker room in which they are required to be in a space with people they do not choose. Bullying was rampant both in the locker room and bathrooms in my schools when I was growing up. The locker rooms had no privacy but as soon as the teacher was not looking, it happened in the open. Less supervision, due to more "private" spaces, allows more opportunities for bullying. With bathrooms, I knew kids who didn't drink anything all day to avoid being in one. I knew others that made a point of asking to use the restroom during class when a bully was very unlikely to be awaiting them. Obviously, these are symptoms of bigger problems....bullying and inadequate supervision, but if I had a kid that was being bullied, I would be concerned about more unsupervised opportunities for it to occur. It would be hard for me to balance that with modesty concerns. All that to say, I don't know what the solution is short of providing secured individual spaces for each single child which is likely cost/space prohibitive for most schools.

My public school lockers rooms didn't even have stalls around the toilets! Just a line of toilets against the wall. You can bet we all made plans to take care of our business before or after gym class!

This is going to vary a LOT depending on materials. What type of siding? For cheap vinyl, that seems high. Have you looked into repairing your existing shingles rather than replace? We have cedar shingles that are at least 80 years old. They were in rough shape a few years ago, so we spot-replaced rotted shingles then repainted. It was FAR less expensive than residing completely and looks really nice. This is in general a terrible time to do repairs. Labor and materials are sky high. So, I am not at all surprised about the cost. But I would get a few quotes. We had our roof redone a few years ago and the quotes were all over the place. We got one quote that was double the actual company we went with.

We did AoPS up until dd stalled out in Intermediate Alg. halfway trough 10th grade, at which time we switched to Foerster's to finish 10th grade math. That ended up being mostly review because I did not figure out that Intro to Alg. was more than just typical Algebra I content until that point (whoops). She moved to DE math after that and completed through Calc II by the end of HS. AoPS was a real challenge for dd but I am glad we did what we did then switched when it got too consuming. Dd is strong in math (and now an engineering major) so the challenge of AoPS served her well long term. But she is also a slow worker so it got to a point where the challenge was just consuming too much time. Whatever you choose, I'd go as far in your current book this year as you can. Solid algebra skills are never a regret and will just make that material easier to digest when you get to it again.

You might have to settle for whatever you can get yours hands on. We are in a precarious car situation. We have one well-functioning car and one very high-miles, rusty car. And three drivers, one of which is living out of state for the summer. We need at least one more car and ideally a second to replace the older car. We do not buy new cars, ever, but considered it since we have been striking out on the used car front. We learned that even for a new car, our options are limited. We could either buy something off the lot that is not anywhere close to what we want or wait an unpredictable amount of time for something closer to what we want. Time is not on our side so we have continued to battle it out on the used car front. We *think* we have secured another older, high-miles, car and we are scooping it up. It is better than nothing and we can always sell if something better comes along. But we have been actively looking for 6 months and this is the first real bite we have gotten. It is also not what we would normally buy, but I'd rather spend 1/4 the money on a car if it is not indeed what we even want.

We never had assumptions about this and often our employment decisions are not planned. We are newly empty-nested and while I called myself a SAHM, I did work part-time through it all. I am now full time and I carry the benefits while dh stepped into a lower-pressure, lower-pay job after a Covid-complicated period of unemployment. It could have gone either way, really. I just happened to be the one to land the main breadwinning job this time. That was also true before we became parents. We are nowhere near retirement age and there is a good chance we will never truly retire. Our finances are such that we both have to (had to) work as much as we reasonably could at any given time so there was no expectation that dh or I would retire once the nest emptied. I know literally no one my age that is not working, male or female, nest full or empty, so there is no real "socially acceptable expectation" other than to work.

I work at and my dd attends a tech school and they too have a similar option and has for at least the lat 20 years.

I started a thread on this very thing on the College board several weeks ago. There is a lot of good info there.

Am I the only one who never knew those mints were made with cream cheese!?!? Mind blown. And I have eaten more than my fair share in church basements.

I have hydrangeas in my yard! At least I think I do....they are currently under two feet of snow yet.... But, I never knew why they changed colors. I didn't plant them, they were here when we moved in 20 years ago. As far as I can tell, they are pretty impossible to neglect. I have never pruned mine and they get pummeled every year with snow falling off the roof, yet they come back every year. Mine start white then go to pink, then blue. However, I will not be seeing those flowers for a few months yet.

My child at age 10 after newly joining a sport that required being outside in very cold temperatures. DC: My coach said to smear gasoline on my face to protect against frostbite. Me: That can't be right. DC: Yes it is, I saw the other kids doing it. Where can I get some? Me (after panic call to coach): Vaseline, dc, vaseline. Big difference.

I didn't respond directly to the post you quoted because I think I had addressed most of the questions in other posts, but this is correct. It was not stressful or "suffering." We had plenty to eat and probably enjoyed our lives as much as we would have had we decided to spend extra on non-essentials, lengthening the time of our debt repayment. It was a calculated decision because we wanted to be able to purchase a house and was largely shut out of that possibility due to our debt load. We figured getting out from under that debt was a freedom. It happened that our careers and life paths look many unexpected detours and freedom from that debt gave us much more flexibility. So given that, yes, I would wish that for others if there is indeed no way to do college without acquiring any debt to begin with. I do have a maybe-irrational concern that having no financial skin in the game will make it harder for students to value their educational opportunities. (I say maybe-irrational because I think that could be another boot-strappy myth I need to shake.....) We also had the benefit of graduating with degrees in good paying and stable professions. I am sure I made financial missteps. Probably a lot, actually. But I am now seeing that those missteps could have landed me in need of debt forgiveness if my income potential and stability was less forgiving. That career choice was also a compromise. I chose it largely because I knew it was going to be a stable career option. I did not go into my first choice of study because it was not. My parents advised me as to debt vs. earning potential and I was mature enough at 18 to believe them rather than ignore their advice. That does not mean it was the "right" thing to do. Maybe I would be much happier and personally fulfilled had I followed my dream? Or maybe I would be on this thread sharing my personal experiences of debt that I cannot shake. We are facing that with my dd. She is currently studying for a degree that is not her first choice because we have been very open about the realities of needing to make adequate income to cover needs and debts. In her case, largely because of immense privilege, specifically lots of very educated and connected people to advise her, she has the resources to make the degree lead to her career path of first choice. A happy compromise, I hope. But who knows? I have come to learn, largely based on people sharing in this thread, that the resentment I was discussing in my OP was a bit misplaced. I do actually know real live people who are carrying student loan debt 20+ years after graduation who very well could have paid that debt off well before now. And done so easily. They made choices to spend on non-essentials, even luxury goods, instead. Not because they weren't savvy. Not because they had no access to good financial education/tools. Simply because they lacked the will-power to delay gratification. The refrain I heard from some of my peers during the years I was driving an ancient car with no AC was "I worked hard in college for the last 4, 6, etc... years and I deserve nice things!" Having their debt erased now seems like rewarding irresponsible behavior. And because that is the most common situation I see with my own experiences, I had projected that onto the idea that debt forgiveness would be largely benefitting these people rather than the many other situations I have learned about from others on this thread. If there is no way to tease out the people who could have paid or still could pay their debts without hardship, that is a collateral damage we may have to accept in order to help the people who are truly unable to get a handle on their debt. Just as we do for people who take advantage of other social programs.

Hmmmm. I think better understanding an issue by hearing people's firsthand experiences and perspectives has helped me to feel much less resentful about this issue than I did two days ago.

OP here. I think you are mistaking another poster for me. Just trying to set the record straight...... Knowing that helping other people is the right thing to do can co-exist with feeling resentful. It's human nature. Unfortunately, the people with the most power know this and use it to their advantage. Which is why I am seeking help in understanding more about it....to move from being resentful.

She is! But we think we solved the mystery. It has to do with when your page was last refreshed. Hers had not been in some time whereas I open the link each time. That is the only thing we figure could have happened.

That is not fair. And if I dig deeper, part of the reason I feel resentful for not being able to go to the college of my choice, not being able to major in what I truly wanted to, and the sacrifices we made to pay off our loans are really part of the whole unfairness of access to higher education in general. Just like anything else, when you start lining people up based on their wealth and privilege, the people not on the top of the ladder start bickering with each other trying not to end up on the bottom. It distracts us from the real reasons the system is broken.

I had depot recently. So, that's at least one other person. But this case is just so weird. I've polled FB and no one else I know had this word. All three of us do it at the same time every day using the same bookmarked link. She took a screenshot and it says NYT, just like mine. I might never solve this mystery......

A lot of what you have had to say in this thread, and others with similar thoughts, are helpful to answering my request to "help me feel less resentful." These perspectives help me to understand why this may be a good thing for everyone (as a piece of widespread reform) even if there are very clear winners and losers. I *still* feel a little resentful because I really wanted to go on vacation and have a car with AC during the years we were paying off debt. And I really would love for dd to attend the college of her dreams. But at least I can start to ponder more on the fact that loan forgiveness is going to be in part to correct the wrongs that have nothing to do with individual responsibility and it just happens to be an unfortunate side-effect that people who lived it up on vacation while I was scanning the paper for free things to do on my "holidays" or kids who are currently enjoying a luxury dorm at a school that is well outside of their realistic price-range also benefit. It is so much easier for me to wrap my brain around food programs and health care. Housing. I am not resentful that I have to pay for my housing and someone else doesn't, even though I know there are some scammers that are benefitting. I can wrap my head around how the sometimes "irresponsible behaviors" that might land someone in the position of needing this help are often symptoms of other things like generational poverty and lack of education. And those things are *needs*. I won't begrudge anyone that needs help getting what they need to live, even if some people take advantage. College, to me, is a luxury. I know many on here have pointed out that it is now a "need," but it really isn't. One can find a job that pays a living wage without traditional, right-after-high-school, dorm-dwelling college or any college at all. So, I think that makes it a harder pill to swallow. Understanding more about how people find themselves in perpetual student loan debt is helpful. FTR, I also had no idea what I was doing when I was signing up for financial aid. But without parent co-signature, I could only take out the maximum federal loans, so my schooling choices were limited to schools that fit within that amount. Which, like dd, meant I did not go to my first choice school. It was actually my last choice and I chose it 100% for financial reasons. If at 18 I thought there was a chance that my debt could vanish at some point, I'm sure I would have made a very different choice. I also did not major in my preferred area of study because I knew I might very well not make enough to eat, let alone pay back my loans!

I am very much in favor of tuition/debt free college! I would not consider anything about your dh's loans to be fair. Especially since he paid six figures and someone who did not bother to make a single payment could also get forgiven. It's not equitable across the table and that is what bothers me about blanket loan forgiveness. There is no distinction between irresponsible choices and people who have genuinely been screwed over.

I fear that was my bad in describing some of my own feelings. And while I *do* have feelings like that, because I am human, I also have feelings about the students here and now, like my dd, that are either not going to school at all or who are making college choices they would not normally choose because they don't want to service insane amount of debt. It seems very unfair that those people are being compromised by attempting to be "fiscally responsible" while others could be rewarded for not.

I *have* heard plenty of grumbling, even while standing in line at the store within earshot of the recipient, about using "my taxpayer money" to buy Twinkies. Twinkies are still food and it really is no one's business. As simple as that is to grasp, it just surprises me that there is not more outrage about student debt forgiveness when the nuances are so much more complicated than Twinkie = food.

That's not really where I am going with this. It is not a "walked barefoot in 10 feet of snow" thing. It's more like taking two people that took out the same amount of loans and make the same salary (regardless of the amount of those loans) but one made (reasonable) choices in order to pay off their debt while the other didn't. If that loan is forgiven, it is basically "punishing" the person that "did the right thing." I know it is not always that simple. And I 100% agree that it hurts everyone when entire generations are delaying everything from home ownership to starting families in order to service unreasonable debt. Something needs to be done. Probably lots of things, actually. But it does really bother me to think of how very unfair blanket loan forgiveness could be to some people....and I happen to be one of them.