Lurking but haven't been active here for a few months. Removed personal info since I'm not posting anymore, just checking. I'm mostly fine LOL just trying to get control of my time. Wishing everyone great things in this new year!

(parts of OP snipped for space) I am greatly in favor of simplicity, and not overdoing holidays (plus I'm broke and lazy, LOL!) but I do try to make things happen so my kids have happy memories and something to look forward to. My girls do a lot of the decorating and preparations. I hang out nearby and provide snacks. BIRTHDAYS/GIFTS. One child has a birthday on or near Thanksgiving, another a few days before Christmas. We celebrate their birthday as if it were any other time of year, but since we aren't able to have several family gatherings for a birthday and holiday in the same week, with family (just grandmas) they get a birthday candle on the dessert of their choice, not just stuck in the pumpkin pie ;) Gifts can be simplified, and even very practical. Stocking stuffers are things we'd normally buy year round- toothbrush, character band aids, pocket size tissues, lip balm, candy, socks, pencils, etc. Regular gifts can also be "boring" like new pajamas, underwear, books, a new pillow fills a large box nicely, gloves/hat/scarf... It sounds like you might prefer they be wrapped in plain paper, maybe even brown kraft paper so thy blend in better than neon green movie character with glitter? :D The goal can be to have a few things for them to open up. My girls really did enjoy getting underwear- whether it was in their days of character-6-packs, or the upgraded Target 5/$20 stuff. COOKIES. The thought of Christmas cookies gives me hives. My mom was NOT a Martha Stewart, but she tried to be with Christmas cookies and I still can't laugh about it, it was so bad. I realized all my kids cared about was decorating and eating cookies. Baking wasn't the main event. So I found frozen pre-shaped dough at a restaurant supply store (Gordon Food Service) so we just loaded th frozen cookies onto trays, bake, cool, decorate. I also bought their tub of white icing, and bought some containers of sprinkles. You could also have a bakery/grocery store bakery sell you baked undecorated cookies. DECORATIONS Maybe instead of "Christmas" decorations aim for a little more "winter" such as a red tablecloth with white dishes, or a "theme" of silver and white? It doesn't have to look like Dr. Seuss' Whoville to look like Christmas. Except for our tree, almost everything we decorate with could be out from Halloween through Valentines Day and not look ridiculous. With a theme, it could be easier for your kids to help you. Instead of wandering around Walmart being overwhelmed, tell her that you'll spend $XX.00 on silver and white decor, and see what she finds. Then it's easy to say "No" to the neon animated light-up honking Christmas goose, LOL!!! Look here... this may be a planner for way more than you'll ever need, but it breaks things down into manageable parts. Gomthrough it with DD and a sharpie to mark out the irrelevant parts, and get some ideas for new traditions. You may end up blacking out 90+% of it, but skim through it as a guide. http://www.flylady.net/i/pdf/hoj_coj.pdf Traditions can be about doing stuff outside the house too- no clutter, LOL! Go ice skating and have the family wear silly knit hats or crazy color scarves. Wear pajamas or character onesies, bring hot chocolate in travel cups and drive around looking at lights. Go to local schools holidays music or chorus concerts. Go see a small ballet studios Nutcracker. I believe you can do this very simply, and it will be enough of a boost that your kids will love it, and still maintain your peace. Let me be the first to wish you Merry Christmas!

If I had a crystal ball, I bet it would show a scenario involving your car and some illegal activity which becomes your responsibility because it happened while the car was registered to you. Not only do I have concerns about a guy who took your car for repair estimate to buy it for himself and is instead having someone else purchase it, but alsomfor the person who would buy a car in this manner... or needs to go the shady route to purchase a car. Are you certain he actually paid for the repairs or will you be getting a bill for those?

Registry only lists people who got caught and convicted... (Not totally doubting your assessment, just pointing out the unfortunate flaw of the system)

:rolleyes: And I thought the parents of the 15 & 25 year olds were crazy. That is an entirely new level of looney. Any Boy Scouts around selling popcorn? I'd buy a big bucket and settle in to watch this drama unfold :rolleyes:

There is nothing in the law requiring you to provide any prior educational records. Not even for high school. Your 12th grade EVALUATOR can require transcripts (your own are fine) for previous high school work in order to sign the state diploma form This is all assuming you're homeschooling, not cyber schooling or private tutoring. All you need to begin are affidavit and objectives. Portfolio at the end of the year is only seen by the evaluator who will provide an evaluation report which you would send to the school district Standardized tests are required in grades 3,5, and 8- only your evaluator sees the results, there should be a place on the evaluation report checked off saying the results were included in the portfolio. If the school,district believes you are out of compliance, there is a procedure they have to follow. Calling and asking for stuff (whether or not it is required by law) is NOT part of the procedure. Click around here- VERY thorough and concise explanations. https://phea.net/pahomeeducationlaw/

Other. I would not have given a push, but I also would absolutely not allow holding up the lesson. I'd hope the lesson began without the child As described, not abusive.

When my girls get their learners permit to drive, after they get the Big Speech about our zero tolerance policy and consequences for texting or other device use while driving, the very first thing they learn is to NEVER asssume that any other driver is actually following traffic laws, especially red lights at intersections. We always look to see if someone appears to be running a red light, and sadly, we're rarely wrong

You're welcome. Unfortunately, we have way too much experience in that area. It has been incredibly damaging. I can at least hope that, since this was an event for girls, it won't end up with a rant on how being female shaped will cause boys to stumble since boys weren't present? :rolleyes: Please, be firm with the coordinator. If she assumes the girls intent was to "look hot" and it wasn't I promise her words will haunt this girl for years. Mine can still quote the people who said rotten things to or about them, and even just in general at classes or events. Also, out of curiosity: what were the other girls not in uniform wearing? Almost every time I saw a girl get a modesty beat down there was another girl wearing a nearly identical outfit, often getting praised for her stylishness, but the second girl wasn't busty, skinny, or wearing the three-strikes-you're-out combo of makeup, something form-fitting/shaped, and b00ks

Agreeing 1million% Don't make this into a modesty beating. my girls have never tried to intentionally "look hot" (words escape me, but you know, going for that attention-grabbing outfit?) but due to their looks, figure, and/or clothing choices it sometimes just happens anyway ;)

Facebook accounts with names like HusbandWife Lastname, with the profile pic of the two of them. I can never tell who is posting, commenting, or who I'm talking to in Messenger :( People on Facebook with very active sales businesses or ministries who don't have a separate account for that so I can choose to follow or block one, the other, or both Or maybe Facebook just needs to be banned :D

COUNT CHOCULA!!!! Oh my gosh I think I ate a box of that stuff every day for a few years of my life :wub:

Whatever happens, I hope the court doesn't rule that the original contractor has to perform the work. NO WAY would I trust him to do a good or even acceptable job, even if he is truly capable of top-level artisan-quality work. I would never trust a buttonhole like that to not intentionally screw something up just to be a spiteful weinerhead. If I ruled the world, I would get three estimates for builder-grade (not bottom, not elite upgrades) tile installation from local established businesses of good reputation, and require the original estimate guy to pay the average of those estimates for one of those contractors to do the work.

Normally I'd agree, but this is a party to welcome new members and no new members will be there to welcome

This is sad. We have not gotten any new place settings since our wedding shower 23.5 years ago. :( I have three children, 1 away at college, plus the ones at home have boyfriends who frequently join us for dinner. All girls have friends who are regular guests as well. The most matching sets I could pull together would be three with dinner plates, bowls, and dessert plates, with matching mugs. We have two teaspoons and two iced tea spoons, six forks, don't know how many butter knives, no steak knives (which is good because we can't afford steak LOL) many mugs, and three glasses. We do have 11 dinner plates, 7clear 4 white. We have about 5 different silverware patterns, but very few that make a matched place setting And none of is is inhat cool eclectic mismatched style... just odds and ends and enough to get by so we never really replaced anything. Somehow we manage to feed small crowds, and I use paper/plastic when necessary If I were buying a new set, I would get service for 12. 8 would be enough for each DD to have a guest, and 12 fits comfortable around the table with both leaves in place. Of course, the chairs won't match, but that wasn't part of the original question ;)

Oh my gosh... that truly makes zero sense. Discontinuing the welcome activities makes perfect sense.

There is zero chance I'd sign up for something without knowing the location. Most days of the week I have three kids who have to be in seven different places. I can almost always make it work due to timing and locations, but i need to know that way ahead of time to make it work. I understand the reasoning, though. And I could *maybe* see it working if the meeting was at a group members home AND all of the members were from a close geographical community... maybe ;)

Deny it as in, "head in the sand" just pretending that they are good best buddy pals with zero romantic interest? Or just not admitting to others that they are dating because they know pretty much everyone will tell them it's wrong? So they are clearly dating, just not calling it dating? I've known young ladies who were clearly in a romantic relationship insist they weren't dating because he hadn't asked her to be his girlfriend so they weren't an "official couple" or one or both wasn't allowed to "date" or have a bf/gf so they were basically dating but just not calling it that. Anyway, my official opinion is that it's weird. I certainly believe in time it could work out just great, assuming they are both good people with good intentions who just happen to fall outside the age gap that is considered ideal in our current society. If he's the kind of creep or aimless guy that no 23yo girl would want to date then my answer would be different. Also, since you said she is actually a high school graduate that puts her in a weird place at such a young age. She's no longer a high school student, but I know 15year olds who are high school freshmen. And due to two years off and the way credits transferred, my 22yo is a college sophomore, along with some 18yos who are also sophomores. It isn't always easy being "off" from the typical timeline, so it can mean that your "peers" in school or work are significantly different in age.

Completely agreeing that it makes complete sense to cancel the party. I also would rather be completey in charge or told what to do. Wondering: Why does her vote to have the party count more than your vote to cancel? How many of the remaining 36 families RSVPed that they are NOT attending.... meaning, is it likely several will just show up assuming the people planning just magically knew they'd be there? Do you enjoy the company of the other three families? It might be a waste of time, but it could still be a good time. :D

:grouphug:

YES! awesome stuff.

Going shorter won't really take much less time to shampoo/condition and comb Is she extra sensitive for other things- sock seams, food textures? My child who HATED to have anything done with her hair is very sensitive to certain touches and textures, and happened to have massive thick tight curls O.o How well does she sit for a haircut? Going shorter might require more frequent trims. Adding a little layering to the bangs and sides will help a little with tangles, but might look messy if not trimmed on schedule. How is she washing her hair? Shower? Submerged in tub? Rinsing by dumping a cup of water over her head? Detachable shower hose? Try different methods, cooler or warmer water? Use less product, esp shampoo. Make sure the hair is really wet then apply shampoo- less is easier to rinse out, more doesn't make it cleaner. Things to try: shampoo conditioner combo product? They aren't as great at cleaning or conditioning, but if her hair doesn't get really dirty or dry then it's one less step Shampoo and spray-on/leave in conditioner/detangler? Again, one less step Dry shampoo powder or spray on non-shampoo days? Would she do better if she was the one shampooing her own hair? She'd be in control of the pressure and speed. Sometimes, a rushed shampoo (and you have good reason to rush!) isn't as gentle and can be uncomfortable Good luck!

I would gather all of the shirts together in their own bin or box, and clearly label it. The box will probably be a reasonable size to store for even a year or two. You can always get rid of them later, but you will never be able to get them back after they're gone. If they're well-worn or for a specific group that is unlikely to be of interest to the general local public they will likely end up as trash or rags, not resold. Anyway, I've found that after massive decluttering I finally have space and time do do things I've always wanted to do. Many of my girls' old shirts are more precious to me than to them- if they didn't want a quilt of them, I'd make it for myself! Our basement "lounge" always needs more blankets :D

Our consequence for things like speeding, accidents, texting/phone use while driving are a loss of driving privileges, and if it is serious and the driver is under 18 the forfeit their license. Definitions: going 30 in a 25 is not OK, but not "serious". A bumper scrape in a parking lot is not serious. Zero tolerance w texting- I LOVE it when the passenger texts back for her. Any drug use or underage drinking = no driving any car we own. So... they got these rules along with their driving permit. The primary reason we allow them to drive as teens is so that we can ensure they are properly trained (at 18, mandatory hours and 6mos wait to test do not apply) but also to make MY life easier. So if they cannot drive, they either do not go, or they PAY $10.00 per hour ($5 minimum for short trips) including wait time, and also time if it's two round trips if the activity is long enough to drop off and return. They know I will do this. I'm that mean mom who literally removed doors when they were slammed (age 8ish... never happened again) and an entire BED for jumping in it (age 4, also never happened again) so when one girl knocked a brick off the wall of her friend's driveway she was worried that she wouldn't be able to drive. Poor sweetie, it's a tight driveway on a bad road- friends mom said that brick is always getting knocked out by new and old drivers alike. So we reviewed and defined "serious" which is basically carelessness and recklessness. Her Junior license also says she has to be off the roads by 11pm (except for work, school, church/volunteering) Even though we expect her to plan to be home with a little time to spare, stuff happens- like the GPS taking her on an "adventurous" route doubling travel time. But being in the driveway by 10:59 is NEVER EVER a reason to speed or be foolish. I do not punish for being late since it is a rare thing and has never happened because she lost track of time. Although once I was watching the clock fornher to come home, I took a screenshot- the time was 10:59:44, so she timed the drive from BFs house to within 16 seconds :D

Not arguing with you, just pointing out that not every 18+ person has had their license very long. In my state, no learners permit until the 16th birthday (I was STUNNED that it's 14 in some states!) and then 6month wait AND minimum of 65 supervised diving hours. But an 18yo can get their permit and test whenever they feel ready, no minimum wait or practice hours. Sooooo my point is, a 17yo in some states could have had their permit and license for over 4 years, while a 19yo could have gotten their license yesterday and only have been driving for two weeks. So we go more by how long they've been driving and how much we trust the person in general. SweetChild's BF drove her to Prom downtown on major freeways about 10 days after passing his test (but had his permit for over a year, with VERY conscientious parents) and there are some adults/parents I wouldn't want my kids to ride with.