My thoughts on this: Yes, people passing on random free stuff they get can seem rather thoughtless BUT it also quite possibly means that they thought of you/your kids while on cruise or whatever. Which is pretty sweet. Generally, I would err on the side of taking things with a thank you (for the thought if not for the actual item). Many/most of them can be gotten rid off/used up etc. (e.g. a cheap plastic blanket could be used for doing arts and crafts projects on, stationery can be used for drawing on etc.). When my older ds was little I spent a lot of time researching the best chair, food, toothpaste whatever. So when my parents gave him the cheap plastic book that was on sale at the grocery store I wasn't too pleased. Partly, because it wasn't the kind of book I thought he should have, but more because I felt they had not spent enough time/energy coming up with the "perfect" gift (but then gifts are ridiculously important to me). Anyway, two things I have learned from this: a) My son actually LOVED that cheap, silly book with the fake woof-sound. He had plenty of other books so it certainly didn't deprive him of "better" books but he really liked that one. b) My mother died before younger son was born and my father a couple of years later. We have basically no extended family. The only presents they get at Christmas/birthdays are from me. Sure, they are generally well thought out gifts (I hope) and they do get plenty. But I REALLY wish there were other people in their lives who care about them and get them stuff, even if it is not perfect (luckily, the kids are not as hung up on gifts as I so they probably don't mind as much). Anyway, I would try to see the positive and just get rid of things if they are too much clutter and if you can do so without hurting feelings.

Interesting question. I have actually never thought about it but basically I would say there is no need to say anything as long as the guns are safely stored/locked. And if they are not stored / locked you shouldn't let atrangers/acquaintances walk around there in the first place. As long as the weapons are safely kept, I don't really care. It isn't any of my business. If they are not, there is so much that can go wrong: visiting children/teenagers, people wanting to be funny whatever. For me (and I have no clue about guns) this is not a question of disclosure but of basic safety.

Honestly, I think you can't. This is where in my opinion the more immediate environment is needed. What I mean is this: I am a huge proponent of a good social safety net. Health insurance for all, basic needs covered, free/inexpensive education etc. And these will cover at least some aspects (e.g. here it is basically impossible not to have health care). But no system can be perfect. Even the sturdiest system will have cracks that people slip through exactly because it is a system and it can't consider every possible variation or it will become too complicate to operate. Quite aside of the fact that the control/oversight aspect would seriously endanger personal freedom. So the only solution is for people/organisations that are closer to the individual case to step in. These are the cases where we need neighbors to invite the kids over for dinner, teachers to gift extra pencils to a child, a church to donate Christmas presents for kids etc. (these are just possible scenarios not musts). And if the general safety net is sturdy it shouldn't overload individuals (as for example medical costs are covered so noone needs to donate for those). Yes, some people will still slip through, because they are ashamed, don't know many people, are surrounded by others in a similar situation etc. But hopefully it should be a much smaller number than now.

I am not sure I quite understand the above - probably because I haven't paid that much attention to the whole "basic minimum income" thing (and I didn't read the entire thread yet). Are you talking about receiving money as opposed to food stamps or similar though? We kind of/sort of have a mix between a basic minimum income and welfare. Basically, you have to be looking for a job but you do get a minimum amount per month to live on. People who make money do not get it but if you earn less than you would get under the program you will get the difference. There is a lot of complaining that the amount budgeted is too low (and of course it depends a lot on individual situations) but I checked the other day and I thought for our family it didn't look that bad (as in it barely makes it worth working). Anyway, the main amount you do get is just deposited into your bank account and you can do as you wish with it. There is probably some sort of checking on it but not that much (we did get this for a while when the kids were little and there was no oversight). I actually don't think there is a huge amount of abuse (though I may be wrong). I mean there is sure to be some but I don't know if it is worse than if there were food stamps etc.

Grocery bagging does come to mind. Here, you have to get them into your bag yourself and you'd better be quick about it! I do miss it as it can be a bit stressful. And noone drives the cart out to your cart for you either. I used to see college kids standing on highways etc. with signs during constructions in the US - not sure they still do that though. People assigning seats in restaurants (though I think that is more cultural and not related to minimum wages as such). Car washes. At least in LA I used to drop off my car before the actual wash. Someone went inside, cleaned/vacuumed. Then they drive it into/out of the car wash and then you sit on lawn chairs! watching as some guy dries/polishes your car for the next 10 to 15 minutes (which made me pretty uncomfortable). Here you drive your car in and out of the machine and that is it as far as I know. Maybe there is some fancy special service (I don't have a car so not sure) but I have never seen someone other than the owner polishing/drying it.

I am honestly always puzzled that people in the US are so accepting of the problems with the health care system. I mean obviously there are a lot of complaints, but overall it isn't seen as completely inacceptable. Living in Europe not having necessary medical care is just not something I can imagine. Sure, the system isn't perfect here either. Sometimes there is a lot of paper work, sometimes it doesn't make sense, some things may not be covered or there may be a longer wait than one wants. But honestly I have never heard of anyone being worried about not receiving medication or going into debt because of it. Luckily, we are all pretty healthy so maybe I am just not as aware as I should be, but I don't think that is it. The US is not a poor country. There must be a way to get affordable health care for everyone. Maybe the problem in the US is that in the past people relied heavily on family/friends/neighbours etc.? I do think that is great (here noone from church brings over food if I am sick) but I think society is changing so much, systems have to change with it. Not everyone has family/church friends these days. And even if, they can bring chicken soup but not chemotherapy. A hundred years ago there just weren't so many medical options so not having access to them was less of a problem. I am much less certain about minimum wage/universal income. There are many jobs in the US that just don't exist in Europe (at least not where I live), presumably because they just can not pay a decent wage. Increasing minimum wages does mean there will be less jobs. So it needs to be counter-acted with education, automation etc. Economies are such complicated constructs with so many interactions that I feel any changes should be incremental so unforeseen/negative consequences can be mitigated.

Cherries would also go good with yogurt. Maybe sprinkle some oatmeal/nuts etc. on top... Or hot cherries on vanilla ice cream...

I was going to say whipped cream or chocolate. But I see you are looking for fruit so that is much trickier. I often see them mixed with other "red" fruit or really any berries. So blackberries, red or black currants, strawberries, raspberries.

That's interesting. Sounds like most of you are themselves in their dreams. I am actually not always in my dreams. Quite often it is like reading a book or watching a movie with different actors etc. and I am aware of that (so I might think: I hope I don't wake up yet or I won't see the end). It is pretty much like watching TV. I think most of the time I am myself but not always. There have been quite a number of times in which I am male in my dreams. The dreams aren't about gender though and it isn't a big issue. Personality wise I am still me but maybe I am the king of Spain or a pirate or whatever. My kids are hardly ever in my dreams which I find a bit concerning. Nightmares usually involve being late for a train/plane and having to pack a ridiculous amount of stuff into suitcases or not finding passports etc. Or having to find my way quickly through large buildings with all the elevators getting stuck, escalators going the wrong way etc. Looking at it like this, it sounds pretty telling...

This is kind of a spin off from the other thread but doesn't necessary relate to the transgender issue at all. It just made me think of something that I have been wondering about. For those of you who remember their dreams (frequently/sometimes/whatever): Are you generally/always/sometimes/never in the dream (i.e. a participant) or is it more like watching a movie? Are you generally/always/sometimes/whatever aware that you are dreaming? If you are in the dream, are you yourself? If not, are you generally the same gender as in real life? Are you even a person? This is just something I have been wondering about - there is no deeper issue or intended purpose for this question.

Well, if someone is dating someone and says "You are too heavy (or whatever) so I won't marry you" that would be horribly shallow. On the other hand, people are attracted to who they are attracted to. I mean you can't make someone marry someone because else they are shallow. Being overweight probably does lower your chances for a date, especially if you don't meet a lot of people that might get to know you better. That being said, I know plenty of people who have gotten married in spite of being on the heavier side.

That's a really interesting perspective. And probably explains why I have never gotten married... I can barely imagine dating someone that I didn't feel was 100% the right one (rightly or wrongly), let alone marry him.

I am not necessarily disagreeing with your conclusion but I can honestly say that none of my friends ever had any emotional trauma (that I know of) due to "hookup" culture. Probably because all my friends were pretty boring that way (actually, I don't think I can think of any of my closer friends that didn't marry their first serious boyfriend).

I voted 26 to 30 which seems pretty reasonable to me. Generally, people don't finish college here until they are in their later twenties (at least they didn't when I was that age, maybe it has changed?). I don't think anyone in my close family has gotten married much earlier than that. I am still not married (that I would classify as too late) but I am not awfully concerned with the age. At least for girls, by 30 would probably be best due to fertility issues and I actually have thought it might not be the worst careerwise to have children while still at school. Still, I have no problem with people living together without being married but do consider marriage a very serious commitment. So I would expect my kids to be pretty sure before they get married (though I know there is no guarantee even if people have known each other for a long time).

My son has a prepaid card which so far I have paid for (I think I have put about $30 on during the 1.5 years he has had it). Edited to add: I have a similar card but have put less money on it.

Hm, maybe I am not quite getting it but I don't see why this would be a big issue? Unless the school is tiny, 15 students won't make much of a difference. It seems unlikely that it would seriously impact the quality of education negatively. I mean it doesn't seem like these are overfull schools and provided the kids speak English they wouldn't really be that much extra work. Obviously, the question remains whether it is a good deal for the students and implementation does matter. Still, with such a limited number the school experience shouldn't be impacted much. And there may be additional benefits from having international students aside of monetary aspects (e.g. native French speakers at a school offering French who might tutor, help with French club etc.).

Not so much beach-beach but I love the Mystic area.

I agree. I have PLENTY of faults. I just don't much tend to jealousy. For the most part, Facebook is really fun for me (I also like Twitter but use it for news so it isn't really "social media" like Facebook). Still, there are things that irritate me. I don't get people who post the most loving descriptions of their spouse (or about how great everything is) and weeks later they are suddenly getting a divorce. I am fairly private so probably wouldn't post the loving stuff to start with (nothing wrong with it of course), but definitely not if it wasn't true. I don't like to see rude jokes or icky pictures. But I just unfollow people posting too much of that and that's it. They can post what they want.

I am not sure I agree with this. I can't disagree with it either as I just don't have enough facts to know one way or another. I think my parents did cost the insurance quite a bit when they got sick (both died fairly quickly though) and I did not have the impression that any costs were cut. On the other hand there may also be a danger of performing procedures that do not really help the patient much (let's say a pacemaker if the patient is suffering and has only days or maybe weeks to live)just to make a profit.

I grew up like this as well. I was an only child and remember clearly sitting with the adults (or under the table or whatever) when I was three,four, five and listening to every word. Obviously, I didn't understand everything but probably most. Don't think I interrupted that much or chimed in - after all I didn't want to get kicked out. That being said, I kind of prefer the kids to go off and play if I meet other adults but that is mostly because I hardly ever have a chance to talk to another adult (maybe once every two or three weeks). I don't really mind if kids stay and participate a bit but don't want them taking over the conversation/changing the topic. Anyway, it hasn't been a problem as my kids have little interest in listening to adult conversation if they don't have to.

Like others have said, for me it would depend on his age and on what kind of bad language/crude humour we are talking about.

Not so much related to Charlie Gard as I don't think there is much to say about it but: I guess I don't quite see why the hospital being part of the government (I am with Sadie on this really but let's just go with it for now) would make it more likely that they put cost over patients' lives (if I understand it correctly) than if the hospital is a private business? Wouldn't a private hospital which presumably is in the business of turning a profit have even more incentives than a government entity (which obviously wants to save money but doesn't really profit of it)? Obviously, no health care system is perfect and there will always be conflicts of interest. But honestly, when I hear the prices people in the US have to pay for regular procedures (appendix, short check in emergency room etc.) it is just ridiculous. The same costs a fraction in Germany and I presume in the UK.

Hm, it is always interesting to see how different people are. I have blocked / unfollowed a couple of people but only because they posted (to me) disturbing stuff. And I am genuinely excited and happy when good stuff happens to people I know. But I generally don't struggle with envy and I think it is because I am almost pathologically optimistic. Someone posts pictures of their huge mansion while we live in a smallísh apartment - no problem as I am convinced we are going to win the lottery any day now (and I browse real estate offerings so I am prepared). Someone else posts about their perfect husband while I am single - doesn't usually bother me as I am sure to meet mister right any day now. Sure, sometimes I have a bad day (or week) and I do feel kind of down looking at perfect pictures but that is pretty rare. And I think it isn't too different from talking with an old friend on the phone or meeting some acquaintance while shopping. People will only show/tell what they want.

I guess it could be like this for some people but it doesn't really bother me. I love to see other people's vacations, special events, kids etc. It doesn't make me feel envious. I do assume that everyone has bad days, struggles etc. Plenty of people post about smaller problems/mishaps. Lots of politics but about 99% agree with my own view so nothing to get upset there. I guess that does give me an unrealistic view of reality (after all, someone makes up the other half of voters) but I don't think it has anything to do with social media per se. Almost all my facebook friends are real friends, former classmates or colleagues etc. so it is more a socio-economic thing. I don't post much myself, pretty much only some vacation pictures. Not so much to bragg, but because it is the only time I remember to take some pictures. I do comment on other people's posts.

The way I understood it the daugher wasn't sick any longer, just run down from being sick. The same has happened to me before (the feeling run down, not the whole boyfriend scenario): I had the chickenpox as an adult and went back to work after a week or two (don't remember). I definitely was no longer contagious or anything. Still, by the end of the day I was completely exhausted. A couple of years ago I had bronchitis. Even after I had recovered from being sick, I still felt exhausted if I just had to run to the store. And of course the mother doesn't owe an explanation and can invite (or not) whoever she wants.Still, there are many things we are allowed to (or not obliged to) but we do not do them (or do them as the case may be) for various reasons: common decency, tradition, not wanting to hurt someone's feelings.