We coslept, but usually had massive bed space so the kids got used to near but not touching. They moved into their own room at 2yo (necessity of newborn moving into our room, lol) and all three share a room. At bedtime, I go in and after story/songs/hugs, lay down on a folding exercise mat by the feet of their beds. After they are asleep, I get up for a couple more hours then to dh/my bed. For us it keeps our room ours, but gives the kids the comfort of going to sleep with me there. If one is sick, we usually move them to another room and I sleep near the sick child. Find what works for you and your family, what needs your dd has, dh as well, and don't forget yourself!

Thanks! I'll check these out!

You can reason why it is a good way to do things, but it still comes down to the idea that symbolic math is a language and like any language it requires rules of syntax. The order of operations is the fundamental syntax of symbolic math. We teach our kids all sorts of rules about word order in english and pluralization, tenses, etc. And there are usually GOOD reasons we do it that way. But other languages, like latin or chinese use very different syntaxes that also make sense.

I have ibook and kindle reader on my iPad 2. Looking for ebooks or Apps that have some good early readers. Cheap or free is best. :D

Sounds like a good opportunity to work on the competitiveness. IMO sibling rivalry is NOT a given, it's a choice. Instead of trying to say "you're the same" try saying, "so what?" I really try to get across to my kids that life isn't a competition with anyone other than yourself. Do the most with what you're given. There is ALWAYS someone smarter, pretty, taller, funnier, more talented than you. So what? Going to curl up in a ball and let someone else decide for you what you can be? Just do the things left over that someone else is NOT good at? And then when someday you meet someone better than you at those things you'll quit them as well? There are thousands of piano protegies that would make your ds look bad. Again, so what? If you spend your life competing with your sibling, at BEST you will strive to be just a snip better than them. That's all it takes to "win" right? But what if that only takes 70% of your capability? If you only compete with yourself then on average you can do so much better in life. Be proud of your siblings for their gifts and abilities. Let them inspire you, and you them. When you see anyone "better" at something instead of begin jealous, why not think, "Hey, if I work hard who knows how good I can be." Learning to enjoy OTHER people's successes is an important life skill, tied to empathy and humility.

Beware opening Pandora's box. As a FB friend with my 14yo social, well-friended, "good kid" niece I can tell you it has convinced me that my kids won't have FB or text ability until they are AT LEAST 16yo. (1) HUGE waste of time. dn spends WAY too much time on FB and texting. She loves that they are allowed to text in the hallways in hs. IMO kids waste their time doing FB and texting rather than spend any real alone time. That constant superficial contact takes the place of IRL interactions and distracts kids from thinking about important life things independent of The Collective. Encourages peer-orientation which isn't healthy for kids. (2) even the most mature kids have no sense about what they post -- private, emotional stuff broadcast in an instant to your 800 closest friends. ANYTHING on the internet NEVER goes away completely -- I can find (via googling my name) copies of e-mail I sent a Toastmasters group in 1998. Kids don't "get" the ramifications of FOREVER and future employers WILL google their names. (3) At 13yo my niece was bullied via text by another girl who thought she liked a boy her friend liked -- and I mean VILE VIOLENT threats. Turns out the girl texted her during school hours which is the ONLY reason the school decided to get involved (imo should have been reported to the police). Electronic communications like texting and FB don't help kids fit in, it makes it easier for kids to interact privately and often BADLY. My sis knew something was wrong but dn wouldn't tell her so she snuck on dn's cell and was shocked at the bullying her dd was receiving; fortunately she printed out all the texts and took them to the school. (4) teaches kids that these things are somehow "necessary" -- I know folks who are trying to afford food spending $$$ on cell phones for their kids. What are you teaching your kids? Fitting in is more important than eating??? Heck, how many of us (me!) spend too much time online, and we're responsible adults. :lol: At 12yo, if your dd is already having issues, hold on teen girls get much, much worse. I'd wait until the nasty MS age passes before bringing that into your home. These things won't TEACH your child restraint, imo you need to wait until dd already demonstrates she is responsible enough. It's like Pandora's box: once you open it it's nearly impossible to put it back. ETA: 1) on cyberbullying: one of the reason it's gotten so bad (and kids are killing themselves over it) is that in "the old days" kids got a respite at home from it; now the bully has electronic access to them 24/7. 2) If all her friends have FB accounts I'm curious how: aren't they 12yo as well? Are they lying to their parents as well? Are those 'friendships' you want to encourage? just my 2cents.

First, I think this IS a big deal and from OPs comments, an ongoing issue (honesty). I think you absolutely did the right thing in confronting dd about it, explaining why it was wrong. I would add an interesting bit from some reading I'm doing. When confronted with a lie, kids will often continue to lie TO PLEASE US. To their thinking, mom is happier with another lie than the truth I did something wrong. So tales about how honesty was rewarded (ala George Washington tale) are more effective than harsh punishment (only motivates them to be better liars). I can't say what I would do, but I probably would try the approach of asking dd what she feels would be a reasonable punishment. I would probably be aiming for something like she gets to unwrap it on Christmas, but not USE it until maybe the 12th day of Christmas (or New Years). I don't think I would throw out the purloined item -- just seems wasteful and spiteful, since it was probably her favorite item. If this had been an "out of character" thing, I might just put the swiped item in "time-out" until Epiphany.

When I was in a private high school, one year they decided that any student receiving one or more Ds would be required to attend a mandatory study hall until 5pm. That was 4 or 5 days a week for 10 weeks. 40 kids "qualified" and 40 kids did it (I wasn't one of them). Nice thing about private school is no parents squawked about their kid missing after school jobs or activities. It was very effective and didn't need to be repeated. :D

WHO (World Health Organization) has separate charts for BF and FF babies. CDC still uses mixed charts that are dominated by FF babies. Dr Sears Baby book goes into this, even some Peds are ignorant of this. In *general* BF babies put on the weight faster, then lean out sooner. No matter how pudgy they are as infants, they tend be be leaners kids and have much fewer weight problems later in life. And no, you can't nurse too often. It's a beautifully self-regulating system. :D

Consider dismantling your bed frame. The lower height is safer and you should be able to get the bassinet to work sidecar style then. We coslept, but once they were a few months old, we put two beds together ON THE FLOOR, one for dh and me, one for dc. That way I could ferry back and forth (I BF) or reach over to calm the baby. Eventually we just moved the beds further apart.

I have no trouble not answering the phone, but if it is ringing a lot I put it in a drawer or turn the ringer off. I have the ringer programmed to turn off during ds' nap time (noon to three). We switched to Google Voice and ditched the landline. One of the best parts is that it converts all phone messages to text and e-mails it to you, so I can scan thru e-mail rather than check voicemail or feel the need to answer. ;) Much less disruptive. I can also set it so that everyone EXCEPT dh goes straight to voicemail (and hence, get an e-mail), and since our cell number isn't known, I can forward just the folks I want to have that kind of access (it can ring multiple phone simultaneously).

If the kiss is that bad, I doubt the rest of the night went much better. Awkward is breakfast the next morning when they each are thinking, "I waited for THAT?!?!" Hopefully years from now they can look back at their wedding day (and night) and laugh. That video is good argument for at least a betrothal kiss. ;)

Because I believe I can do a better job. :)

We bought ours (B70) at Costco on a X-country driving trip while driving thru a sales tax free state -- used it in cabins and hotel rooms for hot drinks and instant oatmeal. I like the Costco one because it comes with so many K-cups. Don't forget to figure them in when comparing costs. We rarely use Kcups, grind our own (just got replacement filter cups)...and for birthday asked for the nice burr grinder from Costco. :lol:

Mario Karts is still our go-to game that all of us can play together. If you have the original Sports that Sports Resort is more of the same. The dancing ones are fun and good exercise, but younger kids do better with ones aimed at them. BoomBlox is another good multiplayer, and 4 can play.

If it gets bad enough... Get a Google Voice number, change dd's cell number but give it to NO one (except you and dh), have her give out her new GV number which you set to forward all calls EXCEPT gam to her new cell number. In GV you can set calls from g'ma to be forwarded to YOUR cell phone. :D We ditched the landline, love the free caller ID and e-mailed voicemail, and the best feature is the ability to send MIL directly to voicemail when she starts driving us nuts (like your mom she thinks we are at her beck and call and have nothing better to do that chat with her; if we don't answer she starts calling at 30min intervals...to talk about NOTHING). :banghead:

Having just posted on avoiding sibling rivalry, my idea her would be to work it. :lol: Stop trying to PT your oldest, and focus on your 2nd. Make a BIG deal about each success. It may motivate dd#2 to outshine her sis, and eventually dd#1 may want to PT as well. If she still resists, take special "PT'd only" outings with dd#2 and leave the oldest and baby with someone at home. DD#1 PT'd in 3 weeks with little effort, DD#2 was 3 YEARS to complete. I'm finally ready to get serious with ds (who just turned 3 and uses the little potty fine *when he wants*). Good luck!

:lol: :lol: :iagree: Unintentional consequence of our moving so often. :D When my older 2 were 4 and 2yo I remember reading a parenting mag. while waiting in a dentist's office. It was all about how sib rivalry was "normal" and for kids my age the average was 6-12 spats PER HOUR. I was shocked 'cause even at their worst it was maybe 6x a DAY, and I was around them ALL THE TIME, so it wasn't like I was missing something. Fast forward to now (8, 6, 3yo) and the older 2, tho very different, really are best of friends. The three of them are amazing together and still only bug each other a couple times a day. I really think the difference has been that sibling HARMONY has been a top priority all along. I'm the youngest of 3 and feel my parents hands-off "work it out yourselves" approach left me odd-man-out and with little connection to my older 2 (tho I looked up to them at the time, once I was an adult I got sick of the same old BS and realized they really had no interest in knowing ME). My dh was an only child in an abusive and dysfunctional family. In practice that means that giving them the words to express when they are frustrated, encouraging empathy, even little things like when I want to give them a treat I give 3 to one kid and let THEM hand it out. It's incredibly rewarding to give a 2yo three of his favorite candies, and without saying a word he automatically shares them with his siblings. Sometimes it is modeling and encouraging those warm fuzzies, "Wow! What a wonderful crown your sister made for you! Aren't you so lucky to have a wonderful sister like her?" I give each of them "jobs" to do to help each of their siblings throughout the day and often have them ASK each other for help -- "Why don't you ask your sister to get that for you," or "Your brother looks like he wants to play dinosaur..." It doesn't hurt for them to see each other as useful! :lol: We've done that since they were newborns. All three also share one bedroom, and when one wakes up scared, they know there is always a hand to hold or a body to snuggle with. I guess I'm saying we seek out those opportunities to foster their mutual appreciation society. Disagreements are addressed in a "Dr Phil" fashion -- they are learning opportunities for how to relate to others in general. One of the biggest things is we do not allow them to be mean or hurtful to each other. Ever. They learn to "play by the rules" early. Hitting or name calling is called abuse, outbursts of things like "I hate you!" are not tolerated. We address the smaller stuff too, like the older dd being bossy and explaining how much it frustrates her sister. Mind you, we not only correct the behavior, but the relationship. Both parties are involved with discussing what led to the problem, signs of frustration, how both parties need to step back and are responsible for the character of their relationship. Time will tell if it all sticks, but it makes for a peaceful home NOW (priceless!!), and IMO I have some extremely well socialized kids, even if they don't see others often. :lol: I am proud of how they treat other people and how they handle themselves. ETA: quick story. Last week dd#2 lost her first tooth. We do NOT do tooth fairy in our home (won't lie to my kids hangup). The kids are fine with this, but dd#2 is a pretty princess kind of girl with imaginary lands they visit, etc. Well, my 8yo took it upon herself to play tooth fairy and made some trinkets out of paper and yarn to put under her sister's pillow. The next morning I go in to be greeted by grinning kids and the proclamation, "My sister is the BEST tooth fairy EVER!"

The same argument could be made about history in general: why study it? The difference is that in the case of evolution, it an understanding of evolution forms the underpinnings of what IMHO is the greatest advancements in science and medicine in the last 20 years: genetics and the genome. As to experiments: from what I see in the sample, most of the hands on stuff is reconstructing chickens from bones, making fossil impressions, and the like. I think young kids really like evolution (esp human) because they are changing all the time, hear "when you are older" and the like -- so to think of grand scale changes like evolution resonates. Not trying to start a debate; just explaining why I feel teaching my kids about evolution is important.

I think this is an interesting question because I think some parents (like mine) think that just being together is enough to foster closeness. Clearly it's not. But when you think of it, you actually spent more contact time with your classmates in ps than with your siblings at home, and I doubt you felt "close" to all your classmates. Working parents spend more time with their coworkers than their spouses or kids, so there is something about the quality of time together rather than just quantity that fosters closeness.

Sounds like a great pick-me-up when I am sliding into boring (which happens, ahem, a lot in LA). I like the idea of spending a couple months focussing on doing fun stuff on one topic. How long do you spend on a unit, typically?

:iagree: Couldn't say it better.

IMO you need to stay home. It can take 24 hrs or more to see the effect of antibiotics, but it is possible that dd has a strain that will not respond to the antibiotics she was given. If that is true, she would still be contagious tomorrow. There is no way of knowing beforehand whether the strain of strep is antibiotic resistant, and resistance is more common. I don't think it is fair to assume she'll be non-contagious, esp since you have a policy that you would have to violate because you "know better" than the policy. ;)

:iagree: My mom's a consulting RN and that's what she tells me. If it's productive (get significant sputum out), let it be. If it is NOT productive, it's time to try to NOT cough (soothe, steam, cough drops, medicine, etc). A non-productive cough is more irritating (and prolongs the sough) than helpful.

Well, self-reporting is never totally scientific, but there are some interesting correlations so far. If the current numbers held true (and my quick math is correct): If you were close as kids, you are 36% more likely to still be close than not. If you were not close, you are 2 and a half time as likely to STILL not be close (or only a 29% chance you'll become close, versus a 58% if you started close). So, even if starting close is no guarantee, you have a little better than equal chance of still being close. If you don't start close, it is unlikely (less than 30%) that you'll ever be close. Again, that is all assuming the numbers hold true (don't change and are representative of families as a whole) which is a HUGE assumption. But still interesting. :D BTW, I didn't offer "other" (considered "it's complicated") because I suspect MOST sibling relationships would end up as "other". :)