Do you ever get so disgusted by homeschoolers that public school starts to look good?

[WTMindy]

I would suggest that you go and sit in a high school cafeteria for an afternoon and just listen and see what you really think of the public schools. I am not at all agains public schools, actually, I taught in a public high school for 5 years and I think there are some amazing kids their! But, as a whole, you will see that kids there are still just kids. I am appalled at what my students felt comfortable with saying when they knew I could hear them.

 

Now I teach in a co-op for homeschoolers and my experience is sadly the same as Ria's. Last year I had one amazing group of girls that I just love, but overall the academic standards are not as high as the public school. However, even if the academic standards aren't as high, I still find them to be delightful kids and I enjoy working with them and TRYING to inspire them to get excited about their own education.

[Blessedfamily]

So, you're saying because you've met homeschoolers who don't meet your standards (whatever those may be) you're considering putting your children in public school? That makes no sense to me. How does the behavior of other homeschoolers affect your decision to homeschool? I guess I'm not seeing the connection.

 

I couldn't care less what others do. My decision to homeschool is based on what's best for my dd, not whether others are "jerks in the name of God" (and what does that even have to do with homeschooling?) or not.

 

:iagree: I have to agree with this....

 

Respectfully snipped.

 

I couldn't agree with you more. At the risk of sounding selfish, my concern as far as homeschooling goes starts and ends with my dd and her education. She is a very bright child, but left to her own devices in a large classroom, she would completely turn off unless she was constantly challenged. The ability to tailor a program in order to directly address her strengths and weaknesses is what sold me on homeschooling.

 

.....As a Christian, I teach my dd to treat other people the way she would have herself treated. .

 

.

 

And this.

 

Public school, private school, homeschool. You will find lax academics and obnoxious parents in the name of "whatever" any where you go. That's their prorities and personalities. I see no difference.

 

I am a Christian, but that is not why I homeschool. I homeschool because my daughter needs a tailored education that schools here can't provide. I have many friends who do so for the same reasons.

Edited December 3, 2008 by Blessedfamily

[Jugglin'5]

I don't mean to hijack the thread (perhaps I should make one of those S/O threads :D), but I must ask a question because I'm curious. My older two have many friends schooled in various ways. More than 1/2 of their friends are really bright, again public, private, home schooled. Their really bright public and private schooled students are nice and fun, but they are not the ones they discuss humanism vs nihilism with, or whether or not Jefferson "walked his talk" (2 conversations recently over heard in the car.) Those conversations happen with their home schooled friends. Their outside-the-home-schooled-friends *may* very well have something to add, but they don't because they much rather talk about entertainment (usually.) Even less specific topics such as, "I had this really cool proof in geometry the other day. What interesting things have you learned lately?" are met with rolled eyes (playful, not disrespectful), laughs (playful, teasing kind), and, "Please, I don't want to talk about that," attitudes. Again, I'm talking about kids who at the top of their class in a school system that is tops in the state (Moorestown, Haddonfield) in a state (NJ) that is at the top of the nation's rankings.

 

We all have rather small pools to gather evidence from, but I wonder at your statement. I would love for you or anyone else for that matter to comment. I guess my question is, outside of class, in the midst of friendship and life, do you see evidence of wanting to be educated as opposed to getting good grades to get into college. Just curious. :001_smile:

 

My experience is somewhat similar. My older girls' homeschooled friends all like to talk about theology, literature, politics, etc, as well as the more typical teen girl stuff. They do have other homeschooled friends on their basketball team who are very different. The parents are giving them a decent, get-into-college education, but they are not big into learning for learning's sake. I don't mind this because I think it is good for my girls to learn to socialize with other people who aren't reading the kind of things that they are. I will admit that I also know some homeschoolers who are NOT doing a good job. We don't live in an area of stellar public schools, so even those kids aren't being shortchanged much, sad to say. All this to say, my girls have friends that discuss all sorts of things that I NEVER discussed with MY friends when I was in GT public school classes. There was never the same level of intellectual curiousity that I see in my kids' homeschooled friends. I do think that many of these kids need to take more math and science, but ultimately, I think the "I am interested, and I can learn" attitude is too valuable to lose for most of these kids for the sake of taking an AP calculus class in public school.

[Guest atat]

I have been homeschooling for 8 years. Since the beginning of their education. At first, no one was supportive. Now, all of my sibs will homeschool their kids. My parents now praise my decision to hs. I have converted several young moms. All this just to say, I am a hard core homeschooler. I believe in it and preach it.

 

BUT... since my kids have gotten older, I am so sick of homeschoolers. The good ones are few and far between. So many of them are petty, weak and incompetent. So many of them don't have good kids. I have homeschooled in 4 states. It was great when they were young, but it's as if the kids get older, all the good ones leave.

 

I am greiving cause honestly, public schoolers are looking really good to me now. At least when they jerks, it's not in the name of God.

 

Any advice for me?:(

 

I can empathize with you Ruthie as my experience with the home school community has not been all positive. I have seen a lot of pettiness, cliques, blackballing and cult-like behavior. There was even conflict among some of the home school associations. While I believe most home schoolers are decent people, I decided to distance myself from the community. I would never consider public school as an option, but I can understand why you said that. I thought about putting my child in private school, but home schooling doesn't require you to hang out with other home schoolers. I'm actually finding it better to mingle with a variety of different folks.

 

My advice to you is to accept that home schooling has changed...for the good and for the bad. With so many different families doing it, you're gonna get some bad apples. Forget about these people and do your own thing.

 

good luck to you and I hope everything works out for you.

[PineFarmMom]

That is strange. I'm in my 9th year of homeschooling. I had a harder time in the early years about dealing with unsavory homeschoolers than now. I've found some wonderful friends for us (or God has) and have met some of the sweetest moms and dads who are raising genuine kids who desire to learn and desire to handle the nonsense they see around them in the world in a Christlike way. My oldest children just spent time with a family this weekend that fits my description, and dd and I were able to talk about some of the deep discussions they had. It has been refreshing to me to say the least, as my first years were many competitive moms and granola snobs, so much so that we didn't feel we fit anywhere. It may be because we moved from a large city where there were tons of homeschoolers to a smaller town where there are fewer. I'm not sure.

 

Teresa

 

Teresa

[PineFarmMom]

I have younger kids and I'm very protective our of time and who we spend time with. I guess I think I will loosen up a bit as they get older and choose their own friends.

 

quote]

 

I don't know. I have gotten more protective rather than less. My oldest is 13. We have seen that when we are conscientious about who we spend time with, we seem to stay focussed more on our values and goals, God's values and goals for our family. I've loosened up at times and pulled in the reigns at times. Even at this point, I see more fruit in pulling in the reigns and being careful about our entertainment choices, our choices in what we do with our time and who we spend our time with. It's meant the difference of my children caring too much about nonsensical things versus important things that have value. I'm guessing I'll know when to let go more. All I know is that it is not yet that time. ;)

 

Teresa

[SnowWhite]

This is why I no longer limit our "social" time and activities to just other homeschoolers. One must cast their net wide to find kindred souls.

 

:iagree:

 

From the beginning, I have been striving to help my ds find friends among public schooled and private schooled children. He does "regular" Little League and Cub Scouts. We go to the YMCA. We have lots of friends at church who make different educational choices. IMO it's just important to be friendly and generous, then friendships with quality families will thrive. However, it can often be discouraging when it seems like a "one-way street," as if your own family must provide the abundance of friendliness and generosity.

[6packofun]

LOL Nope. That would be kinda like letting other Christians who happen to be morons dictate whether or not I believe in God.

[Emmy]

We have lots of friends at church who make different educational choices. IMO it's just important to be friendly and generous, then friendships with quality families will thrive. However, it can often be discouraging when it seems like a "one-way street," as if your own family must provide the abundance of friendliness and generosity.

 

This has been our experience as well - I've tried to keep my oldest in touch with some friends from his brief stint in public school and it's absolutely a one way street. I do all the calling, I do all the offering, I do all the plans. I think that when people have their kids in school they don't have to be as intentional about friendships - gatherings and playdates are more spontaneously planned when they run into other moms picking up from school or scouts and whoever is in line of sight is who gets invited. I've pretty much given up - but I don't have hard feelings about it. Now I'm every bit as intentional but I focus my efforts on the kids' church friends, other homeschool families and my own friends' chidren.

[Mama Lynx]

Every time I read Ria's posts like this, I think: "I'm so glad I don't live there!"

 

My experience has been more like Sarah's. The majority of the homeschoolers I have known, in Texas and in Michigan, were very focused on college. (I do know that there are sizable groups of homeschoolers in TX that do not encourage college for their daughters, but they weren't part of my circle.) And the local high schools were full of kids who did not care about education, and full of girls who thought getting pregnant in high school was a good idea. (And my own high shcool in Oklahoma was like that, too.)

 

I observed many public schools in the Dallas area, and it was at that point that I 1) decided to not become a ps teacher after all, and 2) began to consider homeschooling.

 

Here in Virginia, the homeschoolers I've met so far are also very college-oriented; however, the public schools also seem to be better. Our local Scout troop, which is *not* a homeschooling troop, is very academically oriented (one week that I visited the whole troop listened to and discussed the Gettysburg Address). And the academic classes around here for homeschoolers are impressive, and require excellent writing skills.

 

So it really does depend on where you are.

 

To the OP, though: People are people, warts and all. Yes, I can see how you'd be fed up with homeschoolers. There's a certain type of homeschooler I'm way fed up with, too. But look carefully at your public schools; they might be like Ria's, top-notch. They might be like the ones of my experience - don't go there.

[Word Nerd]

nt

Edited December 15, 2008 by WordGirl

[LibraryLover]

nm

Edited December 15, 2008 by LibraryLover