Young Mother's Helpers

[rainbowmama]

Anyone have a tween (10-12) who worked as a mother's helper? Can you tell me a little about their experience? My eldest wants to do this to try to make some money this summer. She's a big help with her younger siblings, but I do not leave her home alone in the house with them. However, I have never used a mother's helper. I don't really understand the point. I often see younger kids than her advertise on homeschool lists as mother's helpers, but I don't know anyone personally who have had success with this: do people even actually hire kids this young? 

[Raifta]

When my kids were younger (2-4ish) I had a friend's daughter come over a couple of times as a mother's helper.  She was almost at babysitting age, but not quite, and she knew my kids a bit but hadn't spent tons of time with them.  We were basically trying this out over a couple of months so she could get to know the kids (and vice versa) and I could get specific things done (eg. I had her come over on the day I switched out all the summer clothes for winter clothes, which is a ridiculous task in this house even with only two kids, or I had her come over and I focused on making a bunch of freezer meals for the slow cooker).  

 

It worked pretty well - she loved the kids, they loved her, she was always engaging them in things, taught them to do cool things, read to the, played games with them.  Once she was a bit older we did use her as a babysitter on the rare (3-4 x year) occasion we went out.

[Farrar]

Ds is getting started doing this. He's 12. He took the Red Cross class.

 

I think it's best if it's someone who knows the kid. All ds's offers have been people who know him and know he's responsible and good with little kids. He also coached an adorable team of kindergarteners in Destination Imagination.

[Amy in NH]

I used a mothers helper a couple of times when my oldest kids were babies and I needed to get some dirty work done in the basement.  I couldn't keep dropping everything to tend to the baby and toddler.  The girl was 11 or 12 - not old enough for me to feel comfortable leaving home alone with the kids, but fine with me downstairs and accessible in an emergency.  She was a big help!

[LucyStoner]

We used a mother's helper when our older son was about 5. The mother's helper was a 12 year old boy from our church. He came over every other Saturday basically to just play with my son the way an older brother might. I was home the entire time, studying in another room. We did this because I was in a university class that met every other Saturday and I needed to study the weeks I wasn't actually in class. I worked FT during the week and my husband worked those Saturdays so this was the best option.

 

It was a decent experience. We paid him $5/hr and I left out food for them and he knew he could eat whatever. I didn't expect him to do anything besides play with my son.

 

I was full on babysitting when I was 11 and working in a daycare center when I was 12 so I didn't have any issues with a mature 12 year old so long as I was home. My son has ASD so we haven't done many babysitters.

Edited April 13, 2017 by LucyStoner

[indigomama]

My DS 12 (will be 13 in a few days) just had his first day today, as a mother's helper. It's a mom, who has two other children who are in school and a 1 year old. DS plays with the 1 year old so the mom can get some things done around the house. It'll be for 2 hours at a time. It went really well today. He'll be paid $5/hr. 

[Nan in Mass]

When my third was born, I was told I needed to have help for a few months while my health improved. We hired the neighbor's 9yo to come play with the older two for a few hours every afternoon while the baby and I napped. I was within earshot the whole time. We could actually afford to pay a 9yo. the summer. Her mother's reaction was really funny though, when we asked for her. She said, "Are you sure you want her?" She was convinced it wouldn't work but it worked very well.

 

Nan

 

Eta - i started babysitting for our neighbors when I was 10 so 9 with supervision didn't seem strange to me. I think the mother was surprised because her daughter was an only child.

Edited April 13, 2017 by Nan in Mass

[Nan in Mass]

Oops. Dp.

 

Nan

Edited April 13, 2017 by Nan in Mass

[MotherGoose]

My 8 and 11 yos watch my toddler to keep him safe and from destroying the house. I deal with diapers, meals, and meltdowns. But they are really helpful at entertaining him and keeping him safe enough. I'm in earshot. I don't think you can really appreciate the value of having a good eight or eleven year old around with a toddler unless you have the experience! I didn't. :). But when toddler wants to be held by mom, they can take him off and make faces at him and get him to laugh and forget mama for awhile so mama can cook dinner or do something without little hands in it. ETA they don't do this all the time, of course. But my point is that I would be willing to pay (well below babysitting wages of course) for a nice child to help if I didn't have one. :)

Edited April 13, 2017 by MotherGoose

[Guest]

My son was a fabulous mother's helper. He captivated small fry but couldn't really be a baby sitter. Too young and then...too young at heart. But when someone wanted to be at home but not bothering with kids--he was da bomb. And no screens involved.

 

People paid him the same as they paid babysitters. He was that good.

[athomeontheprairie]

My dd11 does this, though she babysits as well. It's been great.

In all cases she knows the family, dh and I would make ourselves available if needed. We are rural, so transportation is always an issue than needs worked out ahead of time.

It can be great for everyone involved.

[Ottakee]

I would have loved that when mine were a lot younger.

 

I was babysitting for short periods of time at 9 and for 8 hour shifts by 11....With a 6 week old and some other kids, sometimes up to 6 kids at a time.

[bettyandbob]

Years ago I hired a mother's helper who was 12. He was awesome. My ds looked up to him. That young man became my babysitter for years.

 

ETA he was a neighbor. When he first started to babysit his mom was home just in case.

Edited April 14, 2017 by Diana P.

[rainbowmama]

I would have loved that when mine were a lot younger.

 

I was babysitting for short periods of time at 9 and for 8 hour shifts by 11....With a 6 week old and some other kids, sometimes up to 6 kids at a time.

 

State law defines child neglect as leaving a kid under 14 unsupervised for an unreasonable period of time, without defining what that is. I hate that law, but I wouldn't feel comfortable letting my tween supervised other kids for money. I also wouldn't hire a babysitter younger than 14 for my younger kids for that reason. 

[rebcoola]

State law defines child neglect as leaving a kid under 14 unsupervised for an unreasonable period of time, without defining what that is. I hate that law, but I wouldn't feel comfortable letting my tween supervised other kids for money. I also wouldn't hire a babysitter younger than 14 for my younger kids for that reason. 

 

 

1 state others have the age as low as 6 and the vast majority have no law.  I personally think 14 is ridiculous and if I lived in that state would lobbying to change it.  But it really has nothing to with have a tween in the basement playing with the kids while you are in the home office.

Edited April 14, 2017 by rebcoola