creekland Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 (edited) Somewhere out there is a person remarking to friends that co-workers actually gave a party to a soon-to-be grandma! And some of them probably spent $20 on gifts just for that! No wonder they don't have the budget for vacations or family gifts... ;) I might be the only one who wouldn't have noticed that someone didn't give a gift. Outside of family and close friends, I'm not really a party person and I'm certainly not a gift giver in everyday life. Giving the party would never have occurred to me and I'd have considered attending a chore more than fun. If I had bought a gift, I'd be mentally fussing over so many better ways I could have been using my money - unless that particular grandma was low income and couldn't afford basics and I saw it more of a kindness/charity case. Gift giving is one of the love languages - one I don't speak. Reading this thread I find no fault at all with the co-worker (regarding the "party") and quite a bit of judging going on all based upon basic human differences. Judging others in such a way is just plain wrong. Edited September 29, 2016 by creekland 14 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluegoat Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 Irritating, but still not my business. Their garden, their standards. Yup. There are some HOA type rules that make sense, but IMO most are totally overstepping and should really not be allowed. And "bringing down property values" is probably the worst reason ever not to allow people to do what they want with their place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 Yup. There are some HOA type rules that make sense, but IMO most are totally overstepping and should really not be allowed. And "bringing down property values" is probably the worst reason ever not to allow people to do what they want with their place. I thought that the OP works for the Board of Health, not an HOA? Shouldn't the determination be simply whether there is a health hazard? Unless the Board of Health has much more far-reaching powers than I thought it would? Either way, I don't see why someone who works there should be judging citizens on how they "play in the sandbox" (OP's metaphor). I'm pretty sure that is not in the job description. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 I'm not sure what their job has to do with this issue? I see a probably socially awkward person invited (maybe?) to a very strange party type event held by two very social besties. She didn't bring a gift. Not a reason to be annoyed. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 And, yes, every child should be celebrated. "Susie, here is a baby gift for your expecting daughter." "Thank you, I'll give it to her!" Great!! "Hey guys, Susie is going to be a Grandma! Let's throw her a shower!" No, too far!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Home'scool Posted September 29, 2016 Author Share Posted September 29, 2016 (edited) A couple of thoughts because there have been a lot of responses: I do believe I have let my annoyance with my co-worker's job performance spill over onto more social things. Like I said, it's a small office and we are in close quarters so everything tends to be out in the open -- no room to go to a corner and take a deep breath and get a break from each other. And I never realized giving a gift to a soon-to-be grandmother would be considered weird by a lot of people. I didn't so much consider her a grandmother, more as giving a gift to a co-worker who is experience something big in her life. When I moved they all bought a few small things for me. But I get that not everyone sees things the same. As far as the high grass and rusty bicycles --- I do work for the Board of Health. When we get call about high grass it is usually for two reasons: someone is concerned about the neighbor's health because things are being let go outside, or the neighbor is concerned about the aesthetic look of the house. We will go out to inspect on these calls. If you just have long grass we don't do anything. It can cause a increase in rats and wildlife but we aren't the grass police. If you have rusty bicycles, for example, we may require you to move them if it is a health hazard. Usually we only make requests that people clean up their yards if there is a large amount of stuff accumulated. That can cause a fire hazard, a hazard to children, a place for rats, and most importantly an impediment to EMS and Fire personnel. We find out about a lot of hoarders in town when stuff starts accumulating in the yards and the grass is growing high. I work for a small town that has a very high per capita income, and we have a LOT of hoarders. So we do use the complaint calls as a way to get out in the community to identify and help people that are otherwise spinning out of control. Edited September 29, 2016 by Home'scool Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoodGrief Posted September 29, 2016 Share Posted September 29, 2016 The Board of Health in your town sounds rather invasive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
QueenCat Posted September 30, 2016 Share Posted September 30, 2016 (edited) Giving a gift isn't weird. Holding a shower in a closed environment like that is just not really cool. Not for a grandmother. Edited September 30, 2016 by QueenCat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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