BlsdMama Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 (edited) please tell me what a bad decision it was to place your high needs, learning challenged, oppositional child into the public school setting. The temptation is so strong. Every bad thing you can think of and any regrets that I can grasp while trying to get through this to the other side of new evals and meds. Edited September 13, 2016 by BlsdMama Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted August 29, 2016 Share Posted August 29, 2016 Well I will say it's the beginning of the year, with a LOT of change happening, and I think a LOT of kids (and teachers and parents, hehe) are struggling, whether it's school school or homeschool. Like seriously, at the ASD charter where we go for some things, you should have HEARD the ruckus last week! It was their first week back, and EVERYONE was so out of the groove! Lots of meltdowns, lots of problems. This week, things are calming down. :) You're getting evals soon? And meds? Sounds good. And someone to come into the home? It's what we're doing, and even though sometimes I get really squeamish about the whole thing, reality is it has been AMAZING for us, essential. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStepAtATime Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: Well, I did the opposite, I pulled my kids out of a brick and mortar school. For one child it was absolutely the right decision and putting her back in would be awful. For the other? I'm not so sure. As OhE said, things are wonky all over. It is the beginning of the school year. This is a challenging time and LOTS of kids/parents/educators are struggling. Hang in there. You are getting evaluations, right? Is there any chance you could have someone come in and work specifically with that one child at least twice a week, preferably 3-4 times a week? You might both be happier if you each had a break. Take a deep breath. This, too, shall pass. (And honestly, have you actually investigated public school? Maybe it wouldn't be an impossible option. Some kids do better with outside instruction and lots and lots of structure, which a public school would provide. I believe DS would have benefited from staying in a brick and mortar school for those very reasons. If you have objections for other reasons, ignore me. :) ) 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 Fwiw, my ds actually has an IEP from the ps, so I know what they would do and what it would be like if he were there. They have an ASTONISHING amount of support they can put in place. For me it was helpful to bring in paid people and realize those behaviors occur no matter who he's with, that it's not ME. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted August 30, 2016 Share Posted August 30, 2016 My younger son's IEP was messed up in an incredibly basic way for a couple of months last year, and when I complained the person I complained to thought *I* was mistaken, b/c how could this possibly be wrong? It was fixed but very frustrating at the time. Very basic stuff not done the way it should have been done. Also last year for my older son..... he scored an 86 on a section of a test, and they "like" kids to score an 85 or below (to qualify for an IEP). That came through but involved a few e-mails and a school employee I found very irritating. Honestly it worked out in both cases, but so!!!!! irritating!!!!! and so!!!!! stupid!!!!!!! So yeah -- you are not having to deal with things like this!!!!! The 86 instead of 85 thing really made me want to scream. It was just so stupid. So, so, so, so, so stupid. Ugh. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted September 13, 2016 Author Share Posted September 13, 2016 New evals are SCHEDULED for the first week of October. So, so, so grateful. As an aside, yesterday was a rockin' awesome school day... Which leaves me a tiny bit afraid for today. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted September 13, 2016 Author Share Posted September 13, 2016 As an aside, the previous neuropsych wondered if his issues really are from a previous brain injury. (Concussion when he was about 5.) She said, looking at his milestones, that it seemed more likely. I honestly just didn't agree but I think it was out of being overwhelmed. I have zero doubt the kiddo is ADHD and severely dyslexic. But the working memory was so incredibly impaired and honestly? I think it's improved quite a lot. It makes me wonder if she wasn't right after all. Now, I wouldn't say we're at the 50% mark or even probably the 25%, but I don't think we are where we were. He started 3rd grade math this year with having to do carrying, borrowing, memorizing multiplication tables, etc., and it isn't NEARLY the effort math has been in the past. We *re-started* half way through Level 3 Barton yesterday. He was finger spelling and having ZERO issues at all with the entire lesson AND we DID an entire lesson. An entire lesson. The whole thing. And then we did some dictation. And he followed directions. It was a crazy day. I'm trying to imagine my level of happiness if I can in any way make today reflect yesterday. I'm thinking a three tier cake to celebrate. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OneStepAtATime Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 So glad you had an awesome day!!! Hoping you have a ton more just like that. :) The awesome days keep everyone's spirits up. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 I hope today goes well, too! 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravin Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 Well, at first it was great. But then the long days took a toll, and the lousy math teacher and math after lunch led to behavior problems at school when the honeymoon was over, and she actually came out of 6th grade knowing LESS math than when she went in (She was tested in 5th grade as being on grade level; in 7th grade she tested at 4th grade level). They got a 504 plan in place which helped some, but we pulled her when she was stuck with the same lousy math teacher (who had decided the problem was her "attitude" and not that he sucked at teaching math or she needed more help) in 7th grade. We went from there to an online charter which took most of the school year to work up an IEP, during which time DD was progressively more demoralized by her inability to keep up across the board, and especially in math, leading to more behavior issues. We pulled her from there as soon as we had the IEP results, and saw what a craptastic half-baked plan they had. No, thanks. Back to homeschooling for us! 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Innisfree Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 This is a question I periodically ponder, too. Dd11 gave me another reason to come down on the side of keeping her home today. She was having a lousy morning trying to get through math, and grumbled, "I wish I was in public school. I could just give up and fail." I guess she at least knows I won't let her do that. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted September 13, 2016 Author Share Posted September 13, 2016 Today was another keeper. Did I really expect two in a ROW?! What in the world? It wasn't argument free but it was argument handleable. I was done with all Barton stuff AND LIPS by 2:30. That's right.... It's NAP TIME and I'm not working on Barton. Mark it on the calendar girls. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lecka Posted September 13, 2016 Share Posted September 13, 2016 Yay!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlsdMama Posted October 10, 2016 Author Share Posted October 10, 2016 Evals were last week. Diagnosed inattentive ADHD with strong recommendations for meds and for therapy. Pre-lim diagnosis of ODD, Concerta. We shall see. Last week was the first week of meds - I'm not seeing much of a difference, but the doctor said the first few weeks are really just to make sure he tolerates it and then we'll adjust the doseage. At least it does explain the conflict, yeah? 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MysteryJen Posted October 10, 2016 Share Posted October 10, 2016 :grouphug: :grouphug: Hang in there. The meds will start working and you will have turned over all the new information in your brain and things will start to work better. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeterPan Posted October 10, 2016 Share Posted October 10, 2016 Will the ODD diagnosis get your insurance to cover any behavioral help? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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