Twins with an academic gap

[Momto4inSoCal]

I have 4yo twins right now. One twin is super energetic and has no desire to sit down. I have lots of building and pretend toys and he loves to play with those which I am totally fine with. Ny other twin ask constantly to do school and is adding sall numbers, taught himself to write letters and is starting to read small cvc words

I was happy that my two would be at the same level but I'm wondering if I will be able to keep them at the same level. Has anyone else had this issue? Did you push one twin to keep up with the other or slow one down. I'm also wondering if doing different levels will cause problems between them. Any advice appreciated :)

[OneStepAtATime]

I don't have twins but there are twins in my family and having also seen posts regarding twins (and triplets) what sometimes seems to work best is using different materials if there is a big gap or vastly different personalities/learning styles.  That keeps comparisons to a minimum, especially if some of the material is not grade based but level based.  They are still very young so maybe this won't always be the case.  Hard to know at this point.  If one is interested in more formal learning then why not go ahead and start introducing more to that twin and see if the other decides to come along for the ride?  If not, I think that's fine, too.  Learning usually happens in spurts and fits, not really in a linear, steady progression.

[kubiac]

There is a pair of fraternal twins at our school who are very different. One is likely gifted or highly gifted, and one is probably somewhat delayed socially, emotionally and intellectually. ANYWAY, they were in public school initially but it was a disaster for the one with challenges and the mom wanted to keep them together so she pulled them both.

 

Long story short, they are in a Montessori program where they can both work at their own pace on self-selected work. It seems to be working quite well. If there are Montessori schools in your neighborhood, they might be worth a look. But if you are going to homeschool, no worries, just meet each kid where they are and remember that fair does not mean equal. They don't have to be doing the same thing.

[sbgrace]

I delayed school start because I had one not ready. Then I probably started a bit early for him even with that delay because his twin was beyond ready.

 

I have always taught subjects in math and LA individually. So they learned to read one on one and did early math one on one as well. My twin who finds academic work easier is the more aware of comparisons twin. His brother could care less about comparisons in academics anyway. So that hasn't been a huge issue here. If comparisons were an issue, I would use different curriculum for each if I could. But I usually teach with the same curriculum and use post it type page markers in different colors so I know who is where in each book. Each of mine does some curricula that his brother doesn't. In some cases this is to add challenge in one twin's areas of strength and in other cases it is to try to address weaknesses that are particular to just one child.

 

I pick shared curriculum with the weaker child in mind. So my weaker in math child has driven my shared math choices. He also drove the phonics instruction we did. However, his twin was a bigger factor in spelling, grammar, and other LA areas as they got older. My point in that is who is "behind" in the gap may change as they grow and mature. It's just not likely that both will be naturally moving at the same place at the same times in all subjects. Generally, then, I think it's nice to be able to go at each child's pace for what I consider core subjects like math and LA. Combining for things like history and science seemed less problematic here, well aside from finding working with your brother brings out the silly in both sometimes.

 

 

Edited February 24, 2016 by sbgrace

[keirin]

I also have fraternal twins (boy/girl) about to start kindergarten in the fall, and I asked this same question recently. Teaching them separately was the suggestion most twin moms made, as onestepatatime suggested, potentially with different curriculum. I'm probably going to try that for reading, but not math, since their abilities are very similiar other than fine motor control and interest level in learning to read.

[Miss Tick]

Mine have always been close in skill level, which is great, so we've always done content subjects (like science and history) together. In second grade I had to split them to different math programs because I could see suppressed competition starting to be really divisive. After I split them, things have gone very smoothly. Everybody does math at the same time, they just work out of their own books. I have kept them together in writing (WWE with a bit of other stuff thrown in), although one is clearly more comfortable writing than the other. I just make sure to add additional scaffolding as needed. It isn't a matter of "skill" as much as comfort with the physical act. A lot of writing time happens alternated with piano practice so that I can better work one-on-one.

 

 

[Sahamamama]

I have 4yo twins right now. One twin is super energetic and has no desire to sit down. I have lots of building and pretend toys and he loves to play with those which I am totally fine with. Ny other twin ask constantly to do school and is adding sall numbers, taught himself to write letters and is starting to read small cvc words

I was happy that my two would be at the same level but I'm wondering if I will be able to keep them at the same level. Has anyone else had this issue? Did you push one twin to keep up with the other or slow one down. I'm also wondering if doing different levels will cause problems between them. Any advice appreciated :)

 

I have monozygotic twin girls, recently turned 9 years old, and an 11 year old daughter. I understand the appeal of keeping twins "on the same level." ;) Something about twins has to be easier, right?

 

While my twins are different from each other in several ways, they are basically on the same page with whatever school work we do. So I'm no help there, sorry. If there have been any academic gaps, I've either ignored them (if minor) or practiced what I call "one-third more" with the child who needs it. More on that below.

 

But even though my twins seem to be on the same level, there are still some considerations with homeschooling twins that I don't think you'd have with singletons. For one thing, mine are always comparing and competing. Always. Competing to tell me the latest news from the play room. Competing to sit by a parent at meal time. Competing to be the first out the door, first to the swing set, first in the pool, first on the bike, first on the sled, first in the van, first in the church door, first in the shower, first for whatever. So when they compete with school work, I tend to just ignore most of it, because I've come to the conclusion that this is just what they do (at least mine do). However, I do try to downplay comparisons that they make between themselves. For example, when they've finished the speed drill for math, they always want to compare and brag. I matter-of-factly say, "Record and graph your score quietly, please." They know I really mean, "Mind your business and stop comparing yourselves." :001_rolleyes:

 

But, getting back to your boys -- I don't think I'd conceptualize any four year old child as being at a "level" when it comes to academic interests. Four is very young, too early to know where they'll be in a few years. If I were in your shoes, I would try to convince myself that each child currently has a different degree of interest in bookish things, seat work, and the like. And, I would keep in mind that this could radically change. Twins are a riot, and you just never know what's around the bend! :)

 

The "one-third more" principle is something I read somewhere (not sure?). It was that if a child seemed to need more direct help and/or practice with a concept or skill, that one-third more time-on-task would possibly be enough to close the gap. So, for example, if one child is struggling with a particular language skill, and the normal lesson is 15 minutes, then "one-third more" would be 5 more minutes, doing one-on-one instruction and/or practice with that child. Or, if one child is struggling with math facts or concepts, and the usual time spent on math is 30 minutes, an extra 10 minutes with that child, one-on-one, will assist the child in mastering the material.

 

I have found this to be true, at least with my twins. I've applied this to everything from geography to math facts to reading comprehension to Latin verbs. It's amazing to me, really, that those few extra minutes of time-on-task can make such an enormous difference, but I think it has to do with the power of one-on-one instruction and the relational connection between a committed teacher and diligent student. The student knows that the teacher is investing, so motivation soars.

 

You may be able to keep your boys "on the same level" by choosing materials and methods that work for both, and then spending a bit more time with one or the other to strengthen mastery in a specific area. I wouldn't prioritize being on the same level over choosing what is best for each child, but I wouldn't project too far into the future at this point. They are four years old. Let them both play, read aloud to both, begin to teach them both some basic phonics (10 minutes at a time), and enjoy their differences. HTH.

[sweetpea3829]

My oldest two are not twins in the literal sense, but...at 11 months apart, sharing the same birth year, they are very much like twins.

 

Academically, they are very different. The younger is accelerated and the older has moderate LDs. Especially in math, which is where the younger particularly shines.

 

I have never been able to combine them for math. He shot well ahead of her very early.

 

I do combine them for language arts and reading, but I modify my expectations a little lower for her. They do the same stuff, read the same books, but I expect more in depth discussion from him.

 

I combine all four kids for history and science, again, adjusting expected output depending on ability. (Oldest to youngest only span 3 1/2 years).

 

Yes, there have been some issues. There was a time when DS9 had quite the big head over his academic abilities and he wasn't shy about sharing. We put an end to that.

 

DD10 DOES notice that she is "not on par" with her brother, but we do what we can to minimize the comparing. We talk a lot about how everyone is different and "smart" in different ways.

 

We talk about embracing our strengths and appreciating those aspects where we struggle.

 

It can be difficult, but it is what it is! We have to all make the best of who are.

[SanDiegoMom]

My fourth grade twins are separate in math as one is right at grade level and the other is probably 3 years accelerated. It had started from the age of three, so it was never a thing since it was always that way- no pulling drastically ahead, he was just already way ahead before she even noticed. She couldn't care less since she likes but doesn't love math. I would never hold him back just as I didn't hold her back in piano when she surged ahead of him .

[Momto4inSoCal]

I have monozygotic twin girls, recently turned 9 years old, and an 11 year old daughter. I understand the appeal of keeping twins "on the same level." ;) Something about twins has to be easier, right?

 

While my twins are different from each other in several ways, they are basically on the same page with whatever school work we do. So I'm no help there, sorry. If there have been any academic gaps, I've either ignored them (if minor) or practiced what I call "one-third more" with the child who needs it. More on that below.

 

But even though my twins seem to be on the same level, there are still some considerations with homeschooling twins that I don't think you'd have with singletons. For one thing, mine are always comparing and competing. Always. Competing to tell me the latest news from the play room. Competing to sit by a parent at meal time. Competing to be the first out the door, first to the swing set, first in the pool, first on the bike, first on the sled, first in the van, first in the church door, first in the shower, first for whatever. So when they compete with school work, I tend to just ignore most of it, because I've come to the conclusion that this is just what they do (at least mine do). However, I do try to downplay comparisons that they make between themselves. For example, when they've finished the speed drill for math, they always want to compare and brag. I matter-of-factly say, "Record and graph your score quietly, please." They know I really mean, "Mind your business and stop comparing yourselves." :001_rolleyes:

 

But, getting back to your boys -- I don't think I'd conceptualize any four year old child as being at a "level" when it comes to academic interests. Four is very young, too early to know where they'll be in a few years. If I were in your shoes, I would try to convince myself that each child currently has a different degree of interest in bookish things, seat work, and the like. And, I would keep in mind that this could radically change. Twins are a riot, and you just never know what's around the bend! :)

 

The "one-third more" principle is something I read somewhere (not sure?). It was that if a child seemed to need more direct help and/or practice with a concept or skill, that one-third more time-on-task would possibly be enough to close the gap. So, for example, if one child is struggling with a particular language skill, and the normal lesson is 15 minutes, then "one-third more" would be 5 more minutes, doing one-on-one instruction and/or practice with that child. Or, if one child is struggling with math facts or concepts, and the usual time spent on math is 30 minutes, an extra 10 minutes with that child, one-on-one, will assist the child in mastering the material.

 

I have found this to be true, at least with my twins. I've applied this to everything from geography to math facts to reading comprehension to Latin verbs. It's amazing to me, really, that those few extra minutes of time-on-task can make such an enormous difference, but I think it has to do with the power of one-on-one instruction and the relational connection between a committed teacher and diligent student. The student knows that the teacher is investing, so motivation soars.

 

You may be able to keep your boys "on the same level" by choosing materials and methods that work for both, and then spending a bit more time with one or the other to strengthen mastery in a specific area. I wouldn't prioritize being on the same level over choosing what is best for each child, but I wouldn't project too far into the future at this point. They are four years old. Let them both play, read aloud to both, begin to teach them both some basic phonics (10 minutes at a time), and enjoy their differences. HTH.

I was hoping that I finally discovered the easy part of having twin but ultimately they are two seperate kids and I have to treat them like that. I had a freak out about 6 months ago with my older girl because I felt like we had no direction and sat down to write a plan for where they are headed and wrote one for my twins and lo and behold the kids decided not to follow it lol. I do try and let them play, the workbooks are really just for when they ask but one twin never ask to do school and the other one constantly wants to do his work so of course that one knows quite a bit more than the other.

 

 

Well I think I've realized no matter with reading and math I would probably need to work one on one with them so they will be wherever they are in those subject and I will just have to work with them at that level. I've been lucky with my older girls since my younger daughter is advanced and ends up working at her sisters level. They've been able to do the same grammar writing and math books so I was hoping I would have the same with the twins but kindergarteners are different than 5th graders. I've never homeschooled for kinder so it's all new for me.

[The Girls' Mom]

Do not push to keep them at the same level.  They are individuals with different needs and abilities and you'll do more harm than good. One thing my girls have thanked me repeatedly for is NOT lumping them together all the time.  They are pretty much treated as siblings that happen to share a birthday ;)

 

It sometimes helps to use different curriculum if they are on different levels and are upset about it.  (It is less noticeable if they are doing two different kinds of math)