Question about kiddos practicing piano...

[daisychics]

Do you just send them to practice piano? or Do you sit with them and watch/listen to them. I never took piano lessons so I don't know what's best. Dh had piano lessons and he says it's best to just let him do it on his own (but he was older 8 or 9). Ds is 7 years old... usually I have him play for 15-20 minutes (I put 20 minutes on the timer and leave) but lately I've been sitting in (and getting frustrated). We started sitting down for 5 minutes to work on his notes (piano teacher's request). He plays well (great for his age, I'm told) but when you point to a note, it takes him a while to tell you what it is.

 

Should I just not be involved? Dh says it should be the piano teacher's job and not mine. I sit in on his lessons, so I know what he has to work on. ack! I should just let him be... *I need some coffee* help me....

[JudoMom]

Do you just send them to practice piano? or Do you sit with them and watch/listen to them. I never took piano lessons so I don't know what's best. Dh had piano lessons and he says it's best to just let him do it on his own (but he was older 8 or 9). Ds is 7 years old... usually I have him play for 15-20 minutes (I put 20 minutes on the timer and leave) but lately I've been sitting in (and getting frustrated). We started sitting down for 5 minutes to work on his notes (piano teacher's request). He plays well (great for his age, I'm told) but when you point to a note, it takes him a while to tell you what it is.

 

Should I just not be involved? Dh says it should be the piano teacher's job and not mine. I sit in on his lessons, so I know what he has to work on. ack! I should just let him be... *I need some coffee* help me....

 

For the most part, I leave them to themselves. My ds9, ds8, & ds6 are all in lessons. If ds6 (or ds8) has a question, ds9 knows more than me so I have him help. Sometimes I'll help ds9 with the rhythm of a piece, but that's only if he's having trouble.

[GailV]

When dd started -- had just turned 8 -- I sat in the room while she practiced. I was in a chair a few feet from the piano where I could see what she was doing, but I wasn't right next to her on the bench. Actually, I usually had something with me to do, like knitting.

 

I gently corrected when I saw her going wrong. Her biggest problem was with rhythm. Sometimes she got mad when I corrected, but, hey, better than practicing wrong all week until it was "in the fingers" wrong -- it's easier to correct when they first make the mistake then after they've practiced the mistake all week (isn't that true of spelling and handwriting, too? not to mention math facts -- would you let him recite "3 times 3 equals 10" all week without correction?).

 

Now that she's been playing a year I ask her if she'd like me to sit with her. I still keep my ears tuned in to what she's doing. I've been known to yell into the room "left hand sounds wrong" or pop my head into the room and say "can I see how that goes?"

 

Sometimes she takes a long time with note recognition, too. Mrs. Piano Teacher, who has scads of experience teaching kids, doesn't seem too worried. At times she (Mrs. Piano Teacher) suggests we work on something together.

 

ETA: I took years of lessons. When older dd started at age 11, I left her to practice herself unless she had questions or I heard a problem from the other room.

[beansprouts]

It depends how old the child is. I think at first they need to learn how to practice effectively, (i.e. playing through an entire song once is *not* practice) and this can take some coaching.

[Michelle in MO]

I would let him practice primarily on his own. I think you have the length of his practice time about right for this age--15 to 20 minutes for a beginner is usually sufficient.

 

As long as your son doesn't mind, though, I think it's fine to sit in on his lessons; that way you know what the teacher is expecting of him and how he/she wants him to practice. If that becomes a problem later (like it did with my kids---they wanted me to leave!) then just make sure you find out from the teacher, when you pick him up from his lesson, what she wants him to practice for the upcoming week. That will help with holding him accountable.

 

For the most part, though, it's best to leave this up to the teacher and give yourself a little break! Congrats on having your son do piano---I think it's a great instrument!

[katilac]

My kids practice entirely on their own. If a parent has a strong musical background, I can see where paying more attention could be helpful, but alas, I do not. The tiny amount that I could assist with is not worth the time and frustration.

 

As far as learning the notes, there are flash cards and games that you can do with him if you really want to help in some way. Frankly, I have come to the conclusion that I have enough on my plate, and providing the instruments, books, and lessons is going to have to be enough!

[Remudamom]

When mine were little I sat with them and helped, as little as possible, just to make sure they practiced.

 

Turn them loose as soon as you can. Depending on your piano teacher, you can let them deal out the consequences for not practicing.

 

Ours started lessons at six, five and eight (three at eight). The then five yr old begged the teacher for lessons every week when she taught big brother, teacher finally gave in and gave her lessons too, so at that age she needed a little help.

 

Now I only have two that still play (the boys never did get into it) and they practice on their own. Course, they are older, and if I had to tell them to practice I doubt they should be taking.

[JudoMom]

It depends how old the child is. I think at first they need to learn how to practice effectively, (i.e. playing through an entire song once is *not* practice) and this can take some coaching.

 

I usually instruct my ds6 (he still has super short songs) to play each piece 10-15 times. Sometimes I'll do the same thing with ds8 (play through each song 5 times). Ds9 usually doesn't need instructions, although when he was learning a Star Wars piece I had to remind him to practice Santa Lucia, too.

[myfunnybunch]

Talk to your piano teacher to see what she suggests. Every teacher has different ideas and expectations, and she will have an idea of what might work best for your son.

 

I would sit with a 7 year-old. LOL, I guess I should say I do sit with my 7 year-old. :) Your ds will learn more quickly if you're there to guide part of his practice--if he's struggling with a task, he's far more likely to succeed if you're there to help. Just think of your job as cheerleader instead of teacher. You're going over those notes to reinforce what he's learning in his lessons.

 

Cat

[TrixieB]

I sat with my 7yo when she first started piano lessons. I don't sit next to her anymore when she practices. Sometimes she will ask me to listen to her practice, especially if it is a song she likes... and then she wants me to sing along (I don't sing well, but it doesn't bother her).

[daisychics]

When dd started -- had just turned 8 -- I sat in the room while she practiced. I was in a chair a few feet from the piano where I could see what she was doing, but I wasn't right next to her on the bench. Actually, I usually had something with me to do, like knitting.

 

I gently corrected when I saw her going wrong. Her biggest problem was with rhythm. Sometimes she got mad when I corrected, but, hey, better than practicing wrong all week until it was "in the fingers" wrong -- it's easier to correct when they first make the mistake then after they've practiced the mistake all week (isn't that true of spelling and handwriting, too? not to mention math facts -- would you let him recite "3 times 3 equals 10" all week without correction?).

 

Yes, I sit behind him on the couch usually playing with dd (coloring or doing puzzle). Lately, I've been frustrated ... I just need to relax!

I do agree with gently correcting him in the beginning.... hmmm, maybe I should just correct him one or two day(s) and let him play the rest of the week on his own.

 

Thanks for your help.

[ncmomo3]

I am always in the room (not right beside them) whenever they practice. They enjoy the feedback and the encouragement. I have done it this way for 5 years and they consistently ASK for me to come and listen to them practice.

[daisychics]

I would let him practice primarily on his own. I think you have the length of his practice time about right for this age--15 to 20 minutes for a beginner is usually sufficient.

 

As long as your son doesn't mind, though, I think it's fine to sit in on his lessons; that way you know what the teacher is expecting of him and how he/she wants him to practice. If that becomes a problem later (like it did with my kids---they wanted me to leave!) then just make sure you find out from the teacher, when you pick him up from his lesson, what she wants him to practice for the upcoming week. That will help with holding him accountable.

 

For the most part, though, it's best to leave this up to the teacher and give yourself a little break! Congrats on having your son do piano---I think it's a great instrument!

 

I asked him if he wanted me to sit in on his lesson, and he said that he doesn't mind if I'm there or if I am not there. :001_huh:

I really do just have to leave it up to the teacher. I DO need a break.

Thanks.

[daisychics]

Frankly, I have come to the conclusion that I have enough on my plate, and providing the instruments, books, and lessons is going to have to be enough!

 

:D I like that.

[Allearia]

My ds6 has been taking lessons almost a year, and I sit next to him and give remiders and help throughout each practice. The teacher prefers that I don't go to the lessons, so I haven't been since the first one, though now ds3 is somewhere else at that time I may ask to sit in on one just so I have more of an idea of how to help. I played flute in band for five years, so I can read music and help with rhythm and timing, but with no piano background sometimes I just tell him to do as his teacher has said. Hopefully when he gets older he can practice mostly on his own, but at this age a week is a long time to go with no instruction and practice things wrong. I guess that is the main disadvantage of starting piano so young - he is doing really well but does need more help from me than I presume an older beginner would.

 

ETA: The few times I have attempted to have him practice without me right there he just played the songs once through without focusing on harder parts. I will have him practice a song that he has been doing for a while while I do something quickly but when he is just learning a song I try to help the whole time.

[daisychics]

Just think of your job as cheerleader instead of teacher. You're going over those notes to reinforce what he's learning in his lessons.

 

Cat

 

:iagree: I SHOULD just be his cheerleader and NOT teacher because he knows more than I do. I could never play anything he is playing now.

[Lawana]

Do you just send them to practice piano? or Do you sit with them and watch/listen to them. I never took piano lessons so I don't know what's best. Dh had piano lessons and he says it's best to just let him do it on his own (but he was older 8 or 9). Ds is 7 years old... usually I have him play for 15-20 minutes (I put 20 minutes on the timer and leave) but lately I've been sitting in (and getting frustrated). We started sitting down for 5 minutes to work on his notes (piano teacher's request). He plays well (great for his age, I'm told) but when you point to a note, it takes him a while to tell you what it is.

 

Should I just not be involved? Dh says it should be the piano teacher's job and not mine. I sit in on his lessons, so I know what he has to work on. ack! I should just let him be... *I need some coffee* help me....

 

I'll weigh in on the option to sit with a child during practice because from my experience, most young children simply do not have the skills to effectively structure their own practice session. I sit with my ds9 and stay in the room with dd11.

 

But I think your decision should be based on your goals for your child. Do you expect him to become an accomplished pianist? Is he taking lessons to try it out to see if it's a good fit? Or somewhere in between? Another way to say it may be, are the lessons mandatory for him or optional. Is it important to you that he progress rather quickly, or would you be satisfied with a slower rate. Also, the personality of the child comes into play. Does your child have an internal drive to accomplish a set goal, even if the goal is not his? I don't know many 7 year olds that do. My dd needed constant instruction to "play it again"- she would give up if it seemed hard. Ds has more drive, but for efficiency, I still sit with him to make sure he doesn't learn it wrong. (I do have some piano background.) Your needs should also play a role in this. Do you have time to sit with him? Do you want to? Are you willing to if that makes his progress faster?

 

If the piano teacher has not already addressed the subject of how to practice, I would ask him/her for very concrete and explicit instructions about how a practice session should be conducted. The teacher should be able to give you an outline something like -figure out the rhythm, then the notes, play right hand 5 times, left hand 5 times, then together 5 times. If the teacher writes this down, so much the better. If not, you could take notes during the lesson. I think teachers vary on how involved they want the parent, but from my experience the typical young child *needs* help with practice. If you don't have piano or music skills yourself, you could still help him structure his practice, making a chart with items to check off when complete, if the teacher doesn't already provide this.

 

You mentioned that you got frustrated when you sit with him during practice. Care to elaborate?

 

Lawana