tuzor Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 A few months ago I decided I was ready to start taking a few graduate classes. I really don't know what came over me. A moment of temporary insanity perhaps. I will be pursuing a MS in Counseling. I will be taking the GRE this Friday. I will be using this summer to get myself and the boys prepared for life while mommy is in school. There will be a few changes this fall in our house. The biggest one is the boys will be attending a classical education school one day a week. This means I will not be the one planning curriculum etc. They will attend one full day get direction from their teacher and then I will teach the off days and help them with their homework etc. This is a bit bittersweet for me. It feels like I'm letting go but honestly I know I can't do it all. While I will not be a full time graduate student I've been out of school for 13 years and I don't know what to expect for graduate school. I've never been a wife, student and teacher before. Is it crazy for me to wish that I absolutely love my program and so it wont seem hard? Does that make any sense? This summer I plan on stocking up on freezer meals but beyond that I don't know how else to prepare. I've noticed while I've been applying to grad schools and studying for the GRE. I have the strongest urge to do something creative, or relaxing, like sew or read a book or take a dance class. If you can understand anything in this post please tell me how you are finding balance with a busy schedule. Many moms have very little time for themselves and then adding graduate school in the mix I'm sure will be quite a challenge but I have to have some me time. Perhaps I should have just signed up for a dance class and waited another year before going to grad school. Any encouraging words would be nice. Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joanne Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 That was me 5 or 6 years ago. I was still homeschooling and continued for a year or so before using a small cottage school. I have NO regrets! Yes, it was hard, but it wa worth it, I love my work, I enjoyed being a student. Being more than a homeschooling mom was a good thing for me and my family. That said, my kids were all over double digit age when I started and I went to a graduate school where it was safe and helpful for them to go with me often. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
unsinkable Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Woohoo! :party: Congrats! I understand the desire to create when other stuff NEEDS to be done. My suggestion is to have a little project that is always accessible, like a bit of needlework or coloring. I think many people find they are more productive the busier they are. So don't be afraid. I'll let the graduate student mommies give you more specific advice! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
In2why Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 I read an article yesterday about raising happy and healthy children and a couple of things came to mind while reading your post. The best way to raise happy children is to be happy ourselves. If our children see us following our passion and living life, they see it as a valuable goal. The other thing was to be or become an optimist and to teach our children how to find the positives in every situation. So for the positives. There is no better lesson in how important education is then seeing you getting more. Your kids can be partners in study time. What a wonderful adventure for all of you. Change means growth and life. How amazing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twigs Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 :hurray: :hurray: :hurray: Congratulations and best wishes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kathryn Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Congratulations! I was in grad school and working when I got pregnant with my oldest. I graduated when he was almost two. It was a hectic time, but I did love what I was doing and I'm sure that helped immensely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gil Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 A few months ago I decided I was ready to start taking a few graduate classes. I really don't know what came over me. A moment of temporary insanity perhaps. I will be pursuing a MS in Counseling. I will be taking the GRE this Friday. Good luck on the exam I will be using this summer to get myself and the boys prepared for life while mommy is in school. There will be a few changes this fall in our house. The biggest one is the boys will be attending a classical education school one day a week. This means I will not be the one planning curriculum etc. They will attend one full day get direction from their teacher and then I will teach the off days and help them with their homework etc. Sounds like a feasible plan and a fair compromise. This is a bit bittersweet for me. It feels like I'm letting go but honestly I know I can't do it all. While I will not be a full time graduate student I've been out of school for 13 years and I don't know what to expect for graduate school. Expect the unexpected. I've never been a wife, student and teacher before. Is it crazy for me to wish that I absolutely love my program and so it wont seem hard? No, if I didn't like my field, I couldn't make it through being a student+employee+ single parent+homeschool+... If you do not like what you are studying after 1 semester, get out of it. The resentment and frustration will greatly reduce your quality of life in every other arena. Does that make any sense? This summer I plan on stocking up on freezer meals but beyond that I don't know how else to prepare. Two tips--one: get a very big deep freezer. Two: look into batch cooking and freezer meals. Learn to eat white rice like an Asian and it just may save your sanity... I've noticed while I've been applying to grad schools and studying for the GRE. I have the strongest urge to do something creative, or relaxing, like sew or read a book or take a dance class. I am athletic. I run everyday, I prioritize it and build it into my schedule--it is my anchor and my 'habit' and it keeps me sane. Find your 'anchor' and treat it like a priority. If you can understand anything in this post please tell me how you are finding balance with a busy schedule. Balance? Hmm...If I have balance then it is when I am constantly on the go, moving according to my schedule: I maintain my balance in much the way that spinning top does--by going very fast and its only when I slow down that I topple over. Its hectic and busy, but I like to live in the current, not on the shore of my obligations. Don't be afraid to tell people "I am busy, Tom. So no, I can't do X for you, no matter how urgently you need me to. I am busy." Teach the kids to cook and let them cook a few things from time to time. My boys are 6 and they have learned the basics of how to cook from my mom (their grandma) but mom and I are going to be expanding on their skills this summer so that they can cook a whole meal by themselves and with minimal oversight. Many moms have very little time for themselves and then adding graduate school in the mix I'm sure will be quite a challenge but I have to have some me time. Perhaps I should have just signed up for a dance class and waited another year before going to grad school. Perhaps you should have, but what compelled you to go to school? Was it on a whim? I am not a 'whim' type person, I don't do anything on a whim. In my experience it is best that you are realistic with yourself about these type of things. I'm a single parent and it has been frustratingly, impossibly difficult to be in school again. I was not a stellar student and I didn't enjoy highschool. I didn't want to go to college and it wasn't expected of me growing up. I am not enjoying college, though it bad, but the degree will allow me to take advantage of an opportunity to change our lives for the better, it sets the precedent for my kids to go to college because I have made it abundantly clear that college is expected of them. The negatives of the college experience were a calculated and measured decision for me and I judged it to be worth it for a shot at working and making a decent living rather working a million part time jobs/ Any encouraging words would be nice. Thanks. Encouraging words: Reserve the right to change your mind. Don't ever give up (on a whim). You can do this. Don't beat yourself up if you fall a few times along the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gil Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 Oh stay off of the internet when you are in class! Watch out, the web can be a real time sink and some websites can suck you in and cause you to waste a whole afternoon before you know it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuzor Posted May 31, 2014 Author Share Posted May 31, 2014 Thanks Joanne, I remember when my mom decided to go back to school and I was in elementary school. It was tough for her. I loved reading her medical books though they were very interesting. However she ended up not finishing her second degree because she was a single parent with not much support around her. I was always leaving my homework on her campus etc. But I remember sitting through all her classes with her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuzor Posted May 31, 2014 Author Share Posted May 31, 2014 Woohoo! :party: Congrats! I understand the desire to create when other stuff NEEDS to be done. My suggestion is to have a little project that is always accessible, like a bit of needlework or coloring. I think many people find they are more productive the busier they are. So don't be afraid. I'll let the graduate student mommies give you more specific advice! This is great advice. I have been teaching myself how to crochet so I will keep a bag with yarn and a few hooks ready so I can indulge myself when the urge hits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuzor Posted May 31, 2014 Author Share Posted May 31, 2014 I read an article yesterday about raising happy and healthy children and a couple of things came to mind while reading your post. The best way to raise happy children is to be happy ourselves. If our children see us following our passion and living life, they see it as a valuable goal. The other thing was to be or become an optimist and to teach our children how to find the positives in every situation. So for the positives. There is no better lesson in how important education is then seeing you getting more. Your kids can be partners in study time. What a wonderful adventure for all of you. Change means growth and life. How amazing. I love the idea of partners in study time. Thanks for the positive outlook and I agree that our attitude really changes how we approach situations. Thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tuzor Posted May 31, 2014 Author Share Posted May 31, 2014 Thanks for the well wishes on the GRE. I need all the luck I can get. :laugh: I will look into batch cooking. I am familiar with freezer cooking but I will look into this concept as well. We do have a deep freeze in the garage that I am so thankful for. I like what you said about building your schedule around running. I need to get a planner and put in my anchors and build around those. I think my boys would enjoy cooking. I am going to use this time during the summer to teach a few basics to them. My decision to go back to school was sort of on a whim but not really. I've been toying with the idea of going back to school for seven years now. I started the application process seven years ago and then things did not work out. I was still working full time outside of the home and my schedule did not accommodate my school classes. Then five years ago I applied again but I was expecting my third child and I just felt that was not the best time to start. Then several months ago I was looking at something online about a certificate program offered at a university in my area and though the certificate program was not for me, my research into that program helped me see that I am in fact ready to start taking one or two classes a semester. So I applied and was accepted into a university. I think my perspective of completing graduate school is realistic. I anticipate it will take me three and half to four years to complete the 60 hour program. I'm not expecting miracles from my husband and children. I know that I am the primary care giver and that will not change. Again thank you so much for your kind words, this was just the encouragement I needed today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostSurprise Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 I think the hardest thing is carving out a set times for your work. It helps if it's a regular time and it helps if your kids are either old enough to respect that or you have someone else to send them to. Stick to it. At first, I did a lot of my reading and writing when my husband was home. Nights. Weekends. It's that way for a lot of grad students. Many of your classmates will be holding down a job, so you won't really be alone in this. Time is precious. Congratulations! And it's good that you don't have a pre-conceived notion that you have to go full time all at once. Find your comfort level. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DawnM Posted May 31, 2014 Share Posted May 31, 2014 You won't regret it. My second grad school experience was after oldest was born and I was pregnant with youngest. I didn't actually get the MA for that one until the boys were 3 and 5. But I did it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melissa in Australia Posted June 1, 2014 Share Posted June 1, 2014 I have no idea what grad school is, but am guessing it is some type of University. Congratulations!!! I have been doing University for the last 5 years, the first 2 years were part time, the last 3 have been full time. I am just about to start my final 11 weeks internship, and I will then be finished. I am so not looking forward to my internship. I haven't worked out how I am going to homeschool at the same time. for the first week of it dh will be in Canada, my mother very nicely is willing to sacrifice a week of her holidays to look after the 2 youngest. Then DH will supposedly assist the children with the work I assign them . I know already how that will go. dd14 will do all her work as she always does, and ds10 will go on strike as he always does. After I have finished my internship then I will have to join the ranks of working part time mother as well as homeschooling mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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