So please tell me about being pregnant at 43

[Shelbelle7]

If you have been pregnant in your low to mid-forties, would you mind sharing with me what your experience was like and possibly how it compared to pregnancies when younger?

 

This will be baby #8. This baby was neither planned, nor prevented (but definitely wanted.) Dh says that we left the door open and God took advantage of the situation. I turned 43 in June. According to my calculations, my due date is January 23, 2009. I haven't been to the doctor/midwives yet, but my first appointment is set for Sept. 9. I'll be just over 20 weeks by then (I know, it's a late first appointment.)

 

I've had 6 babies with midwives in a free-standing birth center. They were all natural births. No problems, no complications. Generally returned home within 6 hours or less of the birth (the best part of it all!) The last baby was at the hospital because we had (it was determined after the birth) a placental abruption. I was told then that if I had anymore dc I would be at greater risk for another placental abruption (I also read that advanced maternal age can contribute to this as well.) That's kind of scary to me.

 

Because the midwives have stopped delivering in the birth center, this will be a hospital birth as well. I'm not so happy with that, but it is what it is at this point. I'd like to know how soon after baby is delivered I can go home! Also, with the last baby I hemmorhaged pretty badly. I've always been a heavy bleeder, but last time it was pretty serious. I would really like NOT to hemmorhage this time.

 

I have mild concerns about Downs Syndrome because of my age. I will not have the quad screening test because it gives too many false positives and I've actually been through that with several of my other pregnancies.

 

One last thing, because I have a history of big babies, I'm hoping to convince the doc to induce me about 2 weeks early. How likely is that? Here are my baby stats:

Rachel: 8lbs 15oz and 8 days late

Tara: 9lbs 5 oz and 8 days late

Zak: 9lbs 10oz and 2 days late

Josh: 9lbs 13 oz and 4 days late

Megan: 9lbs 4.5oz and 4 days early

Darcy: 9lbs 13 oz and 1 day late

Lily: 10lbs 5 oz and ON the due date

 

So, do I have a good shot at convincing the doc to induce me early? With the midwives this was not an option, but because they now work in conjunction with OB's and only deliver in the hospital now, I'm hoping to have this option available to me. Do you know how wonderful it would be to not have to push out another 9 or 10 pounder?? Anything in the 8's would practically fall out of me!!

 

Please tell me about your advanced maternal age pregnancies. I'm wondering if I will be considered a higher risk because of all my history. What do you think?

[Karenciavo]

I hate being induced. I have never experienced the joy of laboring at home, induced 3x. I understand your concerns, but I would take a wait and see approach.

[Amy in NY]

I've been induced with all 5 of mine to keep them small(er). They were still pretty big, except for my oldest dd. My experiences have been positive. I had a birth plan and delivered with a midwife each time. For my last baby, the doctor she works with came at the birth moment, as well, to help with the delivery.

 

As for your concerns, I would take the wait and see approach, also.

[Shelbelle7]

I've been induced with all 5 of mine to keep them small(er). They were still pretty big, except for my oldest dd. My experiences have been positive. I had a birth plan and delivered with a midwife each time. For my last baby, the doctor she works with came at the birth moment, as well, to help with the delivery.

 

As for your concerns, I would take the wait and see approach, also.

Amy, I'm curious....what did your dc weigh? How far along were you when they induced you? How long were you required to stay in the hospital after they were born?

[5knights3maidens]

My last was born when I was 43. (#8) It was an excellent pregnancy and a very fast delivery. Yes, I do believe they will consider you high risk. They did with me and I never had to have a c-section or had any problems. The doctor was always insisting that I get the tests for down syndrome but I always declined. Actually the doctor was getting my dh mad because of this. I never had a home birth or mid wife but if I were to ever have another, it is in my thoughts (I don't know about my dh's thoughts though ;)).

[Quiver0f10]

Congratulations!!! I agree with the wait and see aproach too.

[Sophia]

Aw Shellie, you are blessed.

 

I'll be 44 next month and would love another baby.

 

I had an ob/gyn tell me it is just a myth that older women are more likely to have babies with disabilities. That would be the least of my worries.

 

I was 41 when my last dc was born, and I will admit to being more tired than when I was 29;), but it looks like you will have many helpers on those especially exhausting days.

 

Who knows what your Doc will say about induction.

When I lived in Chicago, Doc's seemed to consider the patients more than where I live now (Ga.) Here they're pretty much "This is how we're going to do it..." Which is why dc #3 and #4 were homebirthed. #6 started at home but we ended up having to transfer to the hospital.

 

Have you been to shelaughed.org?

It's a message board for older moms.

Congratulations and God bless!

[Shelbelle7]

Who knows what your Doc will say about induction.

When I lived in Chicago, Doc's seemed to consider the patients more than where I live now (Ga.) Here they're pretty much "This is how we're going to do it..." Which is why dc #3 and #4 were homebirthed. #6 started at home but we ended up having to transfer to the hospital.

Yeah, I'm just not sure what to expect because I've only ever had prenatal care through midwives. I don't know how involved the OB's are going to be as I *think* that the midwives will still be the primary caregivers throughout the pg. However, if they determine that I'm higher risk, who knows. I'm kind of spoiled by the midwives I think.

 

The last baby was "sort-of" induced. I went to the hospital because I woke up in the middle of the night thinking my water had broken. When I turned on the light, it was all blood (and a lot of it). We went to the hospital. They listened and baby sounded good, so we opted to stay for a little while. It was my due date and the midwives were going to break my water that day anyway. Labor did not start, so after about 5 hours, I got an epi (my first ever) and they started pitocin. About 5 hours more and Lily was born. It was really interesting after having 6 all natural birth experiences. The only bad part was that I hemmorhaged afterward.

 

Have you been to shelaughed.org?

It's a message board for older moms.

Congratulations and God bless!

I have not seen that one, but I will definitely check it out. Thanks for passing that along.

 

And thanks for the congrats! :)

[Brindee]

I was induced with my 2nd becase I'm small boned, pelvis tipped the wrong way (lots of women have that as well), and he was so big. We tried to get him to come naturally but I must have a spa resort in there, cuz he refused! ;) So he was induced 3 days after his due date and weighed over 10 pounds.

 

With number 3 they asked if I wanted to be induced early, so the baby wouldn't get so big. I was hoping not to have to, but I ended up going with it, and she was induced 1 week early. She was 8 1/2 pounds, which was just right! :)

 

I think it depends on who your doctor whether they will induce early. My friend was 36 when she had a baby and she was considered AMA (Advanced maternal age)! I was considered at risk with my 3rd because of my size vs. the baby size, I was a little older, the first two got stuck, and I stopped breathing with both of them. I would guess with your hemmorhaging and large birth weight of previous, as well as your age, that you would be considered a risk pregnancy.

 

Take care of yourself! CONGRATULATIONS!

[kalanamak]

I

Lily: 10lbs 5 oz and ON the due date

 

So, do I have a good shot at convincing the doc to induce me early? W

 

Well, you could work hard on getting up your blood pressure, too :)

 

After the placenta problem of the last one, your OB is NOT going to want you go to late....I think you have a shot at getting it done a bit early.

 

My OB said I had the pregnancy of a 22 year old. I felt great. But he did not let me go over, and I had monitoring daily the last week.

[NancyNellen]

Congratulations!! The only concern I can really speak to is the being induced early because of the baby's size. My 4th baby was 10lbs. 4oz and had shoulder dystocia during delivery. It was extremely scary and something I did NOT want to duplicate with baby #5. My OB was great and agreed to induce me 2 weeks early. He was 8lbs. at 38 weeks gestation, so I am glad we didn't wait!

 

Enjoy your pregnancy and congratulations!!

[Shelbelle7]

Congratulations!! The only concern I can really speak to is the being induced early because of the baby's size. My 4th baby was 10lbs. 4oz and had shoulder dystocia during delivery. It was extremely scary and something I did NOT want to duplicate with baby #5. My OB was great and agreed to induce me 2 weeks early. He was 8lbs. at 38 weeks gestation, so I am glad we didn't wait!

 

Enjoy your pregnancy and congratulations!!

Yep, my last one was 10lbs 5 oz and I know they were working fast and furiously to help her out. It was hard to feel to push, since I'd never had anything but natural childbirth before her and I don't think I pushed well enough. However, could have just been that she was so stinkin' big!! I remember trying to push and looking at dh's eyes, which were huge as saucers and feeling them doing all kinds of manuevering "down there." Not wanting to go through *that* again!!

[Shelbelle7]

Well, you could work hard on getting up your blood pressure, too :)

Hmm, that might be a tough one, as my bp is almost always on the low side, even during pg!! :tongue_smilie:

[NancyNellen]

Oh yeah! My husband was literally pushed up against the wall! Not fun!

[Laurie4b]

I had my last at age 42. All of mine were hospital births. No problems with them. None of mine were induced, though my babies ranged from 8 lb 11oz to 9 lb 4 oz. You can go home the day after you deliver. With your history, I'm sure they will want you to stay the full time to make sure that if you start to hemorrhage, you're right there where you can get help. Placenta abruption is scary. I"m glad that they know to watch for this.

[Laurie4b]

Oh, and compared to my others, it was the fastest. Of course they sent me home after I kinda labored off and on for about 2 hours. I woke up 2 hours later in transition. Got to the hospital in 15 min. Delivered in 15 min. All except my first delivery were pretty easy, relatively speaking.

[Guest]

Congratulations, Shellie! I'm very excited for you!

 

I am not 43, however I did want to address a few of your concerns -

 

1st DC: With DS, I was induced a week early. I hemorrhaged really, really bad and was very sick on top of that. He weighed 7lbs. 9oz. and we were both released within 48 hours.

 

2nd DC: DD was actually induced 5 weeks earlier than her original due date and she weighed 8lbs.14oz. I was induced because dr. felt she was large enough and strong enough based on multiple ultrasounds. I did not hemorrhage with her anything like with DS. I could have been released right away, but she was held an add'l. 24 hours b/c of her larger size she had really high blood sugar and they wanted to watch her. (My insurance allowed me to stay an extra day.)

 

I think a lot of it will depend on your dr., hopsital and insurance. I wish you all the best, though.

[Camy-7 boybarians 1 lady]

The word "induce" makes me cringe...I have not had the experience of it.

 

However, I say "Praise God!" May the Lord strengthen you physically and provide for all of your needs.

 

Congratulations!!

 

Camy

[Diana in OR]

No experience with advanced maternal age (Congratulations! btw), but I had ds#1 in the hospital. No complications other than some tearing and stitches. Since he was born at 10pm, they made me stay the night. I had a slight fever the next morning, but as soon as it went away, they let me go home. I went home around 16 hours after he was born.

[Vida Winter]

I had my last baby at 43. It was the easiest of all my pregnancies, and I was slightly less sick with morning sickness (that is the hardest thing for me - it lasts a long time). It was also the only pregnancy where I was not induced. I loved my water breaking naturally instead of being manually broken. I had to put up with a little joking from my OB (about my age) but I was healthy and fit.

 

My second baby was induced for my convenience - we were newly living in Virginia, an hour from the hospital, small children at home, husband working 14 hours a day. I wanted my mom there. I had to have my mom there. She lived in Utah at the time. So I had a scheduled induction and it went fine. Come to think of it I was considered advanced maternal age for this baby as well (39).

 

Hope this info helps.

 

Dana

[Sue G in PA]

Congrats, Shellie! What great news! I can't answer your questions b/c I just turned 36 2 months after my 7th was born. I did have a question for you and I'm sorry if this is TMI: I had my 7th at home. I, too, bled a LOT during my labor w/ #7. At one point, I was walking to my bathroom and thought my water must have broken b/c I was "dripping", but it was blood! Yikes! I was scared to death. Then, I passed this baseball sized clot! Talk about scary. So, they figured out yours was due to placental abruption? How could they tell? My midwife said she couldn't see anything abnormal about my placenta. Just curious, b/c this is a major fear of mine if we decide to have another.

[Shelbelle7]

Congrats, Shellie! What great news! I can't answer your questions b/c I just turned 36 2 months after my 7th was born. I did have a question for you and I'm sorry if this is TMI: I had my 7th at home. I, too, bled a LOT during my labor w/ #7. At one point, I was walking to my bathroom and thought my water must have broken b/c I was "dripping", but it was blood! Yikes! I was scared to death. Then, I passed this baseball sized clot! Talk about scary. So, they figured out yours was due to placental abruption? How could they tell? My midwife said she couldn't see anything abnormal about my placenta. Just curious, b/c this is a major fear of mine if we decide to have another.

With my abruption, I woke up in the middle of the night thinking that my water had broken. When I turned on the light, I saw that my bed was *full* of blood! Very very scary. I went to the hospital and the bleeding lessened, but was off and on until Lily was born. They hooked me up to a monitor and we heard her heartbeat continuously. She did not have any distress, so they just watched me. Labor did not start on its own after about 5 hours, so I elected to have an epi (my first) and they started pitocin. She was born within about 5 hours of starting that. She was just fine. The midwife examined the placenta and said that it was evident there had been a partial abruption, which I would be more susceptible to in the future if I decided to have any more dc. I think that's what's making me most nervous this time around.

[sweetbaby]

Dh says that we left the door open and God took advantage of the situation

 

I like that one! funny!

 

Congratulations!

[sleepy]

No advice, but I wanted to say Congratulations! :001_smile:

[lovemyboys]

Oh, and compared to my others, it was the fastest.

All except my first delivery were pretty easy, relatively speaking.

 

Had 2 wonderful women as doctors and a nurse-midwife who was my primary. All kept a close watch on the development to be sure baby was ready. He was nearly 8 lbs. at 37 weeks. But I don't have morning sickness, so I never know when I'm pregnant. Like your dh says, God sees those opportunities!

 

Induction went well and then things accelerated so fast that I had no pain meds or epidural just a very fast delivery.

 

The reason for the induction was that I was borderline for preeclampsia and a woman in their care 6 months earlier had a rough go of it during delivery due to her preeclampsia, so as a result, they monitored me very closely in the last 6 weeks or so. For the last two weeks, every other day, then every day. It was all good because they stayed calm and talked things through with me every step of the way.

 

So....Congratulations to you and your family. I think karenciavo said it first here, to just wait and see how things develop. I would definitely be open, given your history in the last delivery, to developing a close rapport with caregivers that you feel you can talk with and trust so that you will trust them as things progress. Being in the hospital has changed alot in the last 20 years, earlier release times, homier atmosphere, nurse-midwives, etc.

 

Wishing you a smooth and marvelous pregnancy and delivery!!

[Shelbelle7]

Had 2 wonderful women as doctors and a nurse-midwife who was my primary. All kept a close watch on the development to be sure baby was ready. He was nearly 8 lbs. at 37 weeks.

I suspect that my last baby (who weighed 10lbs 5oz ON her due date) would have been nearly 8 lbs at 37 weeks as well. But 37 weeks for me this time would be New Year's Day. I'd prefer to go one more week beyond that, just so there wouldn't be a birthday on NYD (my mil is a NYD baby as well.) I already have 2 January babies (the 19th and the 20th), so January is going to be busy and festive regardless of the birthday of this little one.

[lovemyboys]

But 37 weeks for me this time would be New Year's Day. QUOTE]

 

and be induced on Dec. 30th like one of our friends did. Her dh decided that one week early would help his taxes, believe it or not.:001_huh:

 

Then again, a New Year's baby gets its picture in the paper and sometimes gifts and prizes!!

 

37 weeks here was perfect. He was strong and healthy in every respect from day 1, so my worries about being a bit early were just that, worries. And he was about the same weight as db, fullterm.