ProudGrandma Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 I have a 9, 11 and 13 year old. They still often crab and fuss about who goes first, who gets to sit by the window in the car, etc....drives me nuts. But then I read about this idea....but it was geared for much younger kids...but I am wondering if would work for us... assign a kid of the day. So on Monday, kid #1 gets to choose whatever needs choosing...BUT (I have added this) they also get table duty (help me clean up after meals) and this is their laundry day that they do from beginning to end, if a extra chore needs to be done, but it will only take one kid...the kid of the day, gets the chore...Tuesday is kid #2...and so on...each kid will get 2 days per week. so this is a priviledge and a responsiblity. If you have any other thoughts...additions....subtractions...to my plan...I am ALL ears!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 I do something similar with mine. I have for 3 years now and it works well. The person whose day it is to go first gets to chose thier seat in the car, pick the cartoon in the afternoon, choose audiobook or radio in the car, choose between the three rotating morning chores, and choose first or last shower. I don't tie anything else to it. All the other chores are pretty evenly divided anyway with everyone helping out everyday anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Farrar Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 I think it's normal that they might still be doing it. But I also think they're definitely old enough to stop, either with the help of a system like the one you suggest or with something else. Watch out that they don't start squabbling over the system instead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K&Rs Mom Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 We've been doing that for a long time - one has even-numbered days, the other has odds. It mostly affects dishwashing after dinner, but also privilege of choosing what to watch if they get TV time, and it's easy to resolve an argument by asking, "Whose day is it?" Front seat in the car goes by the old rule of calling "shotgun" though - doesn't matter what day (and if they argue over who called it, they can both sit in back). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
craftyerin Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 We do kid-of-the-day. Mine are much younger, but I'm quite sure we'll still being doing it when they're 9-13. It helps SO much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 My 18yo and 15yo still fight over who gets to ride shotgun to church. :rolleyes: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProudGrandma Posted August 10, 2013 Author Share Posted August 10, 2013 For Real??? I was so hoping my kids would grow out this very soon...UGH!!!! At least I know my kids aren't the only ones. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 My 18yo and 15yo still fight over who gets to ride shotgun to church. :rolleyes: My sister and I had this, let's call it a discussion, within the past year. We are both over *ahem* 29. :P Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinder Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 For Real??? I was so hoping my kids would grow out this very soon...UGH!!!! At least I know my kids aren't the only ones. Not really. Usually ds2 is in the car first so he just gets the seat and ds1 doesn't argue about it. They don't really fuss and fight but once in awhile if they're both heading to the car at the same time they will start running while calling shotgun. Then they push each other around for a minute before ds1 gets in the back. Ever since ds1 got his license he's more willing to sit in the back when someone else is driving. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BellaStarr Posted August 10, 2013 Share Posted August 10, 2013 My 24yo and 15yo STILL do it. Every time we all go somewhere together they argue and race each other to the car. I have to make them take turns, just like when they were little..lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beaners Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 My family had a wonderful rule where the oldest always got to sit in front. As the oldest, I appreciated it greatly. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
*Lulu* Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 My family had a wonderful rule where the oldest always got to sit in front. As the oldest, I appreciated it greatly. ;) If only my mother had had such a sensible rule. B) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomatHWTK Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 I recently assigned specific days to specific kids for a privilege (getting in the shower first). They fussed and fought and couldn't remember whose turn it was. So finally I said that they needed to remember their day to go first or lose it. Then, if someone else wanted to go first and the person holding the privilege was willing to sell or exchange the privilege for something of value (chore, cash, whatever) they were free to do so. So on your day, you own the rights and you can sell them or give them away. I pretty much knew that this would put and end to the issue as two out of three of mine won't part with money for anything. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Desert Rat Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 My boys have had days since they were old enough to fight over things so 1 and 4. Oldest gets even days, youngest gets odd. Anything to be decided defers to whose day it is. They are 13 and 10. I don't see an end in sight. But, we don't have arguments, so I'm fine with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swimtaxi234 Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 We only have two children, so it was easy for our family. We said the rule was the oldest child always got the front seat if they were both in the car - no questions! They are 16- and 13-years-old and so far we haven't had any issues. I saw our friends juggle who sat in the front seat and decided that I didn't want that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mom2bee Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 If they are young enough to still care about those types of things, then they are not too young for you to offer a solution. Whatever that solution is will vary, though I kind of like your idea. (I didn't read the replies). I will add that in my family things went by age, but it varied. Shower privileges were given to the youngest since they tend to get sleepy and fall asleep first. Car privileges were given to the oldest, snacks oldest to youngest, but no one could eat their snack until everyone (the youngest) had gotten their snack, if we ran out then the older kids contribute a portion of their snack to the youngest. In general, the oldest got whatever it was that everyone was clamoring for because the oldest was responsible for everything that went wrong. When ever my older brother got too smug, we could make him suffer. :). We balanced each other out nicely. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starr Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 Once both kids were old enough to sit in the front seat we traded by the week. I also had chores for them that rotated weekly. In the end they negotiated how they wanted to divide up the chores. My mom felt if you rotate daily there is potentially too much comparison as to what happened each day. It worked well when I was a kid so I went with it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lawana Posted August 11, 2013 Share Posted August 11, 2013 My family had a wonderful rule where the oldest always got to sit in front. As the oldest, I appreciated it greatly. ;) We do this. Always have, always will, and the younger still complains sometimes. But most of the time it goes smoothly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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