Cindy in FL. Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 When you have guests over, what do you do to keep the kids (ours and theirs) from leaving toys and games all over the place so that the house is a disaster later? What rules/methods have worked for you without becoming inhospitable or overly strict when guests are in your house? It's seems difficult to keep track of and police while you are entertaining guests and ends up being a major headache after they leave. Thanks, Husband of Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KristineIN Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 We have the guests help us pick up before we leave. I always help when I go to someone else's house too. I hate having a mess after people leave. Kristine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue G in PA Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 Okay guys, time to clean up! Everybody helps and then they leave. Guests are usually MORE willing to help than my own dc! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JudoMom Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 When you have guests over, what do you do to keep the kids (ours and theirs) from leaving toys and games all over the place so that the house is a disaster later? What rules/methods have worked for you without becoming inhospitable or overly strict when guests are in your house? It's seems difficult to keep track of and police while you are entertaining guests and ends up being a major headache after they leave. Thanks, Husband of Cindy I talk to my boys beforehand and remind them they are responsible to clean up whatever toy messes are made by their friends. This keeps me from having to police their fun (my boys are pretty good about not letting the kids just do run-by-dumpings of all the toy bins because they know they'll be cleaning it up). Also, almost all of the toys are in the playroom and that's where they are played with for the most part (the playroom is in the basement and they tend not to drag them up the stairs). I'm pretty strict about games in general--no more than one out at a time and you have to have someone to play it with you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcconnellboys Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 Ummm, tie them to a chair? I haven't yet found a foolproof way to handle this..... Regena Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in FL. Posted February 4, 2008 Author Share Posted February 4, 2008 I know that the root of the problem is with my parenting, because my boys do this even when we don't have people over. I really need to crack down on this behavior for the sake of my sanity and to teach them responsibility. We don't have a playroom, so the toys are divided between their two bedrooms and the games are in a closet in the dining room. I never fails that we have a mess in, literally, every room of the house. This is partially due to the fact that we are a bit to involved in our time with the adult guests and the children may need more hands on supervision. Thanks for responding to my dh's post. Now... how do I punish him for posting on MY forum without my permission? Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sue in WI Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 It is usually 15 minutes before they are planning on leaving. I also go down to assist them, and help them remember where things go. If I am visiting with the parents, they will help monitor the clean-up. I used to just remind them to clean up, and found that this way is much more effective.:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momofkhm Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 10 lashes with a wet noodle? :rolleyes: He's just trying to help. My dh gets more out of the kids than I do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jean in Newcastle Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 We have the guests help us pick up before we leave. I always help when I go to someone else's house too. I hate having a mess after people leave. Kristine This is exactly what I do. Most guests (and their moms) are very happy to help with the clean up. And my kids police their friends somewhat too (since they would hate to be left with a huge mess to clean up on their own). I only had one child over who was absolutely horrible. He literally went flying about the play room dumping out one bin after another (and not even looking at or attempting to play with the contents). After 5 minutes my ds was begging me to restrain his friend! I marched in there and told that boy to get into the living room - sat him in front of the t.v. and ordered him to watch t.v. until his mom came back! Never again was he invited to play at our house! I don't know what the deal was (he doesn't have ADD or any diagnosis like that) but that was more than we could take! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DIY-DY Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 Okay guys, time to clean up! Everybody helps and then they leave. Guests are usually MORE willing to help than my own dc! We don't leave a friend's house until we've helped pick up, and I wouldn't want my friends to do that to us. Really, we've never had anybody have a problem with it. I think most parents appreciate both the hosts' perspective, as well as the real-life lesson that our responsibilities are ours whether we're at home or out w/ friends. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lisa at Home Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 My kids know that in the end THEY are responsible for whatever mess is left over. It is their responsibility to not let anything get out of control. Sometimes they do call for parental reinforcement when a very little child just wants to dump boxes full of stuff, though. Gee, we never seem to have problems in this area!:D ~Lisa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemyboys Posted February 4, 2008 Share Posted February 4, 2008 Have dc put away the game or bin they're playing with before they get the next one out. That's helped me here even if I'm not really strict with it. It's a good habit. Wish I did it more with my stuff! Totally agree with others here about guests and toys, we just announce a clean-up about 5 min. before friends leave. All our friends do it too, because none of the kids want to be stuck with the cleanup by themselves later. And dc know that they can come to me quietly if a playmate is going wild dumping everything out. For your dc, maybe they could have an area or two to leave toys around and other areas (like the den) where they have to be picked up each day. It just keeps the chaos down a bit, at least for me. As for your dh, well, you'll just have to figure out an appropriate punishment there.....lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cindy in FL. Posted February 4, 2008 Author Share Posted February 4, 2008 It all sounds so much like just using common sense. Maybe that's my problem. :o One of our gatherings is a monthly event where we have 11-12 couples and their children. It can get a bit unwieldy to put it mildly. The adults usually listen to an audio on a chosen subject and then we have a discussion. The children are on there own during this time for the most part (none of them are really young). Then we all eat together and just hang out. Because of the nature of this group, people leave a varying times. So, what's the best way to handle clean up in that case? Some children might leave an hour before others and then next thing you know the last couple is leaving and no one has cleaned up. Maybe I'll figure out a way to really cut down on the amount of toys that are at their disposal during these gatherings? It really didn't used to bother me so much, but I have some health issues lately that make it more difficult for me to handle the extra stress. We have already cut way back on entertaining because of that and I don't want to quit altogether. Socialization for the children, you know! :D Cindy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BarbaraL in OK Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 We "edit" the toys & games severely before a big gathering. When a lot of kids will be over and the parents will certainly be busy chatting, we put away everything with lots of little pieces (lego, Bionicles!), everything that is noisy or could easily be a weapon, and anything fragile or that my sons don't want other kids playing with. Then we put out several very play-able things for the different ages, and leave it at that. We usually put out big legos (Duplos?) for little kids, or Brio-type train track, or wooden blocks, and our set of pirate-theme Imaginext for all ages (just the big elements and the people). For upper elementary and older kids, usually we have one or two sturdy games that younger kids could play, too, and some quirky toys. I'm now a big fan of editing before folks come over. Then there just isn't that much to clean up. Even if it's four or five bins of stuff, at least it's not those tiny bits and pieces. And the kids seem to enjoy themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canada_Mom Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 That's what we do too! I started noticing that the more toys we had out, the more the kids played with, but it wasn't because they really needed to. So, now, before we have company over that I know will keep me busy talking with the adults or if I know there's going to be a lot of kids, I put away about 1/2 of the bins of toys that the kids have. Mostly, the piddly stuff that is a pain to sort through once kids have mixed it all- Legos, tiny Barbie accessories etc. I also make sure anything fragile is put away as my kids have been devastated in the past when a treasured toy was broken by a careless friend. The kids never seem to notice that there is a "shortage" of toys and the clean up at the end is quick and easy. I find this helps with the issue of having multiple families, you know how that goes- at the end of the visit, the kids have put away toys (and taken out) so many times that nothing is really put away once the last family leaves. The added bonus of this... sometimes the toys "forget" to come out of hiding afterwards. In fact, just recently my kids went an entire month without 4 bins of toys before asking where this was... and that... It was great! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lovemyboys Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 I've never seen a list of toys that matches so closely with what ds here play with -- we could swap houses! lol We've done the same here, limit what's available. Sounds like you're mostly getting together to enjoy the company, so a few well-chosen toys should be just fine. And all those painstakingly constructed legos are put safely out of reach! Most of all, make it possible for you to continue in a way that won't be too much for you health-wise, since it sounds like you enjoy it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fiddledeedee Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 We have a playroom, with LOTS of toys, including several Playmobil sets, Littlest Pet Shop sets, and just various toys. My kids keep things relatively tidy, but visiting kids come and go nuts. They dump everything out, and drag toys from room to room. Even seeing toys were everywhere, I've had people just say, "c'mon kids, time to go!" and just LEAVE. I find it hard to tell someone I've just met to have their kids help clean up. To me it seems like common sense to ask their kids to clean up after themselves, but I've learned this isn't the case with everyone. We can't really just put all the Playmobil and other toys with pieces away beforehand, it would be more work to do that. I guess I need to get a backbone, and tell them beforehand that they'll need to clean up when they are done. I'm tired of cleaning up after other people's kids! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzanne in ABQ Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 Same here. When I get a sense that they are thinking about leaving, (or sometimes when I think it's time for them to go), I just announce to all the kids that it's clean-up time. I've never had anyone refuse to help clean up (unless it was a big mess when they got there). :o Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Natalieclare Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 I guess it doesn't bother me to pick up after my guests leave. My poor kids though--they have to pick up when they are hosts *and* pick up when they are guests (my requirement). Sometimes we say "yes" when people offer to help, but honestly, I find it easier to gather up my family and tackle it quietly together. This may be due to the fact that most of our friends have 5 or more kids...I don't know. We are a family with lots of various sets in lots of various baskets and certain baskets go in certain rooms, which is probably another reason we like to just do it ourselves. I hope you find a system that enables you maximum enjoyment in hospitality! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lynn Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 I let them play and just clean it up later. Howeve, if it gets out of control, leaving a game scattered for something else then I'll ask for this to be put away before another is taken out. I don't mind if te toy bins are emptied those just take a few minutes to dump back in. Most mom's will ask their children to help clean up and if they don't I really don't mind doing it afterwards. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
A.J. at J.A. Posted February 5, 2008 Share Posted February 5, 2008 It is usually 15 minutes before they are planning on leaving. I also go down to assist them, and help them remember where things go. If I am visiting with the parents, they will help monitor the clean-up. I used to just remind them to clean up, and found that this way is much more effective.:) This is what we do also. We just announce it about 15 minutes before it is time to leave. Angela Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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