need advice badly!

[persephone43]

Hi all!

Do any of you home school while working a full time day job or know anyone who has pulled this off successfully?

 

I have family that is willing to help tutor here and there during the day but about half of it will be up to me to teach in the evenings/weekends. My fiance works week nights and can be there during the day to supervise but he wont be actually teaching or really assisting, except perhaps if he gets really stuck on something.

 

A little background...I taught my dd (now in college) at home for 3 years ala TWTM very successfully. My son (12 years old) has been primarily public schooled (minus a 1/2 year unsuccessful attempt at home...due to mostly external factors not present any longer) and needs remedial work badly. He is two grades behind and still doing poorly. (Very long and winding story). There doesn't really seem to be another choice but to home school at this point. I know in my heart that this needs to happen, I just need some guidance and encouragement I guess. Thoughts?

 

Thanks in advance :)

[hana]

Is intense remedial afterschooling a possibility?

[lewelma]

Have you looked at the Robinson Curriculum? I don't remember the full story, but the dad worked full time in the home while the kids schooled themselves (I think the mom had died). He focused on just the 3Rs. Each day each kid did 2 hours math, 2 hours reading (fiction and nonfiction), 1 hour writing (which he evaluated over the weekend). Obviously, not a full-bodied education, but it worked for them very very successfully.

 

Ruth in NZ

[persephone43]

The other half of this story is he will be leaving the elementary school next school year that he has been attending since Kindergarten and moving to my side of town (his dad, who lived across the street from his current elementary school, just moved across the country in September and I have been relying on my ex-husbands very wonderful but very....how shall I say this.....very messed up family...aka 2 grown kids and their kids all live with the grandparents in one big house because my ex's two sisters and brother cant quite get their lives together....not the ideal environment for *my* child and I believe a contributing factor to his problems). But they literally live across the street from his school and I work till 5, so I had little choice but to keep him there this year since my ex gave me no warning that he would be moving.

 

I live closer to my family (across the street from my sister who doesnt work, my parents and my dd), who are all healthy positive influences and more than willing to help me.

 

While the schools closer to me may be better in some respects, he will be starting next year at a new school in the last year of elementary (gr 5) as an almost 13 year old...his birthday is in November. (he already is a big kid for his age); he was diagnoses with a mild sensory processing disorder and I believe has ADHD; we have tried afterschooling and to be honest, he was already done with "school type activities" at noon; public school has killed his love of science...most recent grade in science is an F, down from a D earlier this year..... I could go on and on....

 

This is THE KID that I definitely should have kept home from day one and done Charlotte Mason with. He needed a later introduction to academics and more "exploration time". He is very Kinesthetic, physical and wants to do science projects all day...or work a full time job (yes, he has already expressed many times the desire to "just work and not have to learn anything else". I really am afraid that he never will recover/succeed if he stays in public schools.

 

I *feel* like this can work....but I have my doubts since this isnt the traditional way to homeschool or how I did it with my daughter years ago.

 

Sorry if this was incoherent...trying to type fast before I leave for work. Thanks for listening :)

[Starr]

I've read of families who make this work but it's a lot for you to keep going. They are unlikely to manage on their own during the day. You might have to shift the schedule so they sleep in late and go to bed late and longer days on your days off. This really cuts in to all of your free time. Remedial work needs to be done every day. Coming home and being disappointed that not enough has happened and having a fit won't further your cause. I find the hardest part of home educating is keeping myself on task/schedule. Maybe a family member can take some regular responsibility for a particular subject.

[persephone43]

My dd would tutor him in history and literature 2-3 times a week (she is almost 19 and very reliable and has a passion for these subjects) and I am really considering hiring a math tutor.

I do have my mom to take him to the library, tutors etc as needed. so language arts and science would primarily be what we do in the evenings/weekends. He would have to do a lot of independent work however. But the sleeping in/staying up later might work actually.

[Mom22ns]

I have a couple of friends that do this by using Abeka with video instruction. The parents do a little checking to make sure they are keeping up, do some grading and occasionally help if the kids need it.

[PeterPan]

I would consider meds (to make sure he has the best chance at succeeding), and I would get something extremely structured and realistic like cyberschool. Our state has online charter/cyber schools. Also, I don't know if you know this, but there may be vo-tech oriented charter schools in your state. They combine solid academics with later apprenticeships. Might suit your ds's hands-on side.

 

He's going to need very consistent exposure to get his remedial subjects up. If you have something very structured, then the adult is there supervising, not teaching. Yes they like some independence and quite, but no they are not likely to be efficient when left by themselves. You're going to have to spend time every week creating clear checklists and expectations. It's NOT romantic. At some point you're going to burn out, because you're going to work your job and come home to what is, in reality, also a job. You'll never have any time off or time to be his mom. Granted that's hyperbole, but it's going to push you. If you can get a program that does a chunk of that work for you (charter school, cyber school available through your state), that would help.

 

If you can't do that, well you're going to be one especially hardworking mama! Doesn't sound like you could do much worse than the schools are right now for him. Make sure of the basics. Make sure he can read and do basic math. Use your WTM methods for the content subjects. Make sure he has something worthwhile to do with his hands. (birdhouse kits, whatever) Give him a PE requirement every day. See if you can hook him up with someone with a trade so he can learn a skill.

[fairfarmhand]

I would do teaching textbooks math. (computer software that is self checking) I do believe that this kid is going to need plenty of hand holding, so I would not assume that he would be okay if I didn;t look at school each day. I would also plan my evening intensely. For instance, I'd have a simple dinner, perhaps that he can partially prepare. Then I'd let him play while I looked over his work. Then we would work for an hour or so on schoolwork together. I'd teach tomorrow;s lessons and allow him to complete the assignments the next day. i would probably allow him to stay up later with me that normal to do schoolwork and spend time together. Then he could sleep in a bit later in the morning and head to your sister's For a bit

 

At this point, I would not stress too badly over science and history stuff. I'd just work on getting him caught up in reading, grammar, writing and math. Also I would give him a list of chores to complete, a list of activities to do if he got bored and a list of websites to help him if he gets stuck on a subject. You also need to remember that he will be used to having someone tell him exactly what to do and ask questions any time he gets stuck. Getting him to be a more self-directed learner will be tricky. I would brag on him when you come home and he's worked through a problem and figured stuff out on his own. Also, I bet you are definitely going to want to invest in some internet filtering/monitoring software. This will help you know how much time he spends on the computer if you are not there.

 

some people have great success with time4learning.com. That might be where I would start.

 

also, We'd be making a weekly trip to the library to have a huge stack of books for him to read,

[persephone43]

Thank you for all for the suggestions! (Keep them coming ;). I will definitely be looking into these. And I loved homeschooling...I've absolutely missed it, so I think this may be a fun project for me in the evenings and weekends. I know it will be hard work but I'm up for it. Lots to think about. Thank you ladies! I've so missed this forum :)

[persephone43]

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[CupOCoffee]

I need to head to bed, but I will write you tomorrow. I've been homeschooling and working FT since the start. I do have someone with the kids all day though. It's HARD, I won't lie. You have to be disciplined yourself; even when you are exhausted from a long day of work. But it CAN work. I will write how we do things tomorrow

 

~coffee~

[persephone43]

That would be great Coffee, thanks!

 

 

[besroma]

I hope you are able to work things out to homeschool him.

 

I recommend looking at Veritas Press self-paced online history. They have a two-week free trial and also offer a group buy. I think the group buy, which offers a nice discount, is in August.

 

You can also find Teaching Textbooks used on the classifeds board here, and on ebay.

[persephone43]

How strange...I just posted a question about Oak Meadow after reading about it on another thread. Have you used it personally?

[Anne in CA]

I have done this briefly, and I have had a child in elementary school that I did homework with after a long day. Put it this way, for a child to be successful in school you need to do TWO hours of homework and reading with them every night anyway. The average child will not be successful without it IME. So, I do not see much difference between putting in two and a half hours of instruction at night and doing two hours of work, part of which the school teacher assigned and may or may not be understandable. At least with your two and a half hours you could choose your own materials that you know you understand.

 

You would need to find someone responsible for the boy to be with while you work. I had to quit going to the gym at lunch because my then 12yo dd was doing things she shouldn't with the computer (she made her own facebook account without telling me and other things like that). It is just as mentally tiring to watch TV all day as it is to do school work, and if he is at home all day with the TV he will be no better off to do school work with you after dinner than if he had been in school.

 

If you are an early bird you could try doing school with him at 5:30 to 6:30 before you go to work, drop him off somewhere to do independent work and some reading, after you pick him up and eat dinner correct his independent work and work with him on new things. That would break up his day a bit, go to bed early.

 

Maybe he could go to Karate or something that gets him physical activity during the day too. Kids this age can want to be couch potatoes, but it is the worst thing for them.

[persephone43]

We afterschool anyway for about an hour a night plus his school homework, so it shouldn't be too much for me and probably will be easier on him. And my fiancé works week nights so he will be home with him in the daytime. Thanks for the responses. I feel a little better now.