Gymnastics Moms -- WWYD w/New Gym

[Purple Cat]

I signed my boy/girl twins up for the summer session of gymnastics. I signed my son up for a boys' class and my daughter up for a girls' class that met at the same time. I called the owner/manager BEFORE I signed my son up to explain that he had significant gross motor delays. She explained that my son was the only boy who had registered for the class and that the class wouldn't be held unless 3 boys had registered. She told me to wait until the first lesson to pay rather than having to refund my money. She offered he could join the girls' class. I explained that I did NOT want my son to join the girls' class and would rather not have him take lessons if the boys' class was not held. She said I would definitely be contacted before the first class if hte boys' class would not be held.

 

I arrived for our first class, and was told the boys' class would not be held unless the two boys taking the trial class that night agreed to join the gym and were willing to take the class an hour later. At the same time, I was told I had to pay in full right then. I reiterated I had already explained I did NOT want him in the girls' class and wanted my money refunded if the boys' class was not being held. The owner/manager wasn't there.

 

The new boys did not join, so I was then told my son was being put in hte girls' class. I said NO, that I had been very clear from the beginning I did not want that. I also said I wanted our money back if hte boys' class was not being held. The instructor told me two additional boys were going to take a trial class next week and if they joined and if they could meet at another time then an all boys' class would be held. I was also told my son had to attend the all girls' class next week while the new boys figured out if they were going to join and could come an hour later. The instructor explained all this. The owner/manager was not there. The instructor told me "maybe you could get a credit" if the class was cancelled.

 

I've been upset all weekend about my son having to take the girls' class next week and the uncertainty.

 

WWYD? I need to call the owner/manager Monday and need guidance on what to say.

Thank you.

[Acorn]

I'd let him attend the merged class.

[sparkygirl]

What are your reservations about him being in the combined boy/girl class? There are obviously reasons that you are requesting all boys or no class at all. We are just starting at a gym and there was never any pressure regarding what class, what time or payment. They don't have a trial option and are great with the kids and teaching the sport properly.

[Annie G]

I'd call and talk to the owner and get your money back. The class with girls isn't what you want- and she should refund your money.

[SJ.]

Since you had already spoken with the owner I agree that you should get your money back.

 

I am curious why you don't want your son taking a gymnastics class with girls? In the schools near me most classes are combined in the younger crowd. Until recently they didn't differentiate until 1st grade. The only reason it changed at the school we had attended previously was because there were enough boys to hold a 4-5 yr old class.

Edited June 4, 2012 by SJ.

[Catwoman]

I'd call and talk to the owner and get your money back. The class with girls isn't what you want- and she should refund your money.

 

:iagree:

[QuirkyKapers]

Since you had originally talked with the owner and were told to wait to pay until they knew how many boys were attending, I would contact that person.

[Mommy22alyns]

I am also curious as to why you are so opposed to a mixed class? But they should refund your money.

[Purple Cat]

Thank you for the responses.

 

In this particular case, I am adamant about not wanting my son to attend the girls' class for several reasons. His twin sister is in the girls' class, which opens up a huge dynamic. He NEEDS things separate from her. And she needs things separate from him. Second, he has significant gross motor delays and a pretty competitive relationship with his twin sister where he is on the losing end. With his delays, I want him to be able to focus on enjoying himself and gaining strength, without him and his sister comparing themselves to each other. Also, when both have been in the same class before, they tend to get very silly together and/or start tackling, etc. They behave more maturely when separate because they don't have a partner in crime willing to join them in antics. Finally, and perhaps most importantly, my little boy is adamant that he does NOT want to be in a class with girls. And if I'm putting my little boy in a class that I know he will gain a little but definitely not be able to perform near the same level as the other kids, I want him to feel comfortable. And if that means he is in with the guys, and not with 10 girls, then I want to honor his wish.

 

I guess to me the fact I made clear OUR preference NOT to attend the girls' class upfront is one part of why I believe our preference should be honored or are money refunded.

[SJ.]

Thank you for the responses. <SNIP>

 

I guess to me the fact I made clear OUR preference NOT to attend the girls' class upfront is one part of why I believe our preference should be honored or are money refunded.

 

I agree with you. I wouldn't worry about it unless you speak to the owner/person you previously spoke to and they refuse to refund your money. I am betting they will work with you. I hope you can find something else for your son. Have you thought about swimming?

[bbmom]

Sounds like an instructor who is doing their best to enforce the normal policies of the gym without knowing about your previous conversation with the owner. I would talk to the owner about what happened, remind her of your previous conversation if needed, and ask about how to handle the class this week since having him do the girls class is not an option. Give her the chance to make it right, which I am assuming she will do since she was so accommodating the first time you spoke.

[sparkygirl]

Thank you for the responses.

 

In this particular case, I am adamant about not wanting my son to attend the girls' class for several reasons. His twin sister is in the girls' class, which opens up a huge dynamic. He NEEDS things separate from her. And she needs things separate from him. Second, he has significant gross motor delays and a pretty competitive relationship with his twin sister where he is on the losing end. With his delays, I want him to be able to focus on enjoying himself and gaining strength, without him and his sister comparing themselves to each other. Also, when both have been in the same class before, they tend to get very silly together and/or start tackling, etc. They behave more maturely when separate because they don't have a partner in crime willing to join them in antics. Finally, and perhaps most importantly, my little boy is adamant that he does NOT want to be in a class with girls. And if I'm putting my little boy in a class that I know he will gain a little but definitely not be able to perform near the same level as the other kids, I want him to feel comfortable. And if that means he is in with the guys, and not with 10 girls, then I want to honor his wish.

 

I guess to me the fact I made clear OUR preference NOT to attend the girls' class upfront is one part of why I believe our preference should be honored or are money refunded.

 

Thank you for this response. Sorry, I am just now getting back around to responding to this thread. It sounds absolutely reasonable to request a refund and that your preference be honored and the money refunded. Would it be too much to find a different activity for him to do? Even with his twin sister in a different class it is the same sport and the competition with him on the losing end would continue even in separate classes.

 

If he has a gross motor delay have you looked into the special olympics recreational sports? They are wonderful to work with and a friend's daughter is really flourishing in an environment that works with her to be successful and recognizes her success and her personal best. My friend's daughter is on the basketball team (3 on 3 with coaches) and swimming.

[PiCO]

Sounds like an instructor who is doing their best to enforce the normal policies of the gym without knowing about your previous conversation with the owner. I would talk to the owner about what happened, remind her of your previous conversation if needed, and ask about how to handle the class this week since having him do the girls class is not an option. Give her the chance to make it right, which I am assuming she will do since she was so accommodating the first time you spoke.

:iagree:

I'm also curious as to what happened?

[Purple Cat]

Thank you for asking. Everything worked out well. I left a friendly message for the director, explaining my son's excitement to talk an all boys class and my desire to position him to really enjoy and continue with gymnastics and his equal adamance that he didn't want to be with girls. I asked how we could work it out. She called back and said she pulled some boys in to form an all-boys class that would meet at a slightly different time. We were happy to be flexible, and I'm so relieved that the situation was resolved in a friendly way!