Bang!Zoom! Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 And now... I'm cleaning the house from 3K miles away. How did you feel when your first-born accepted a proposal? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
justamouse Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 Congratulations!!!!! You're going to be a mother in law! Well, it hasn't happened to me yet, and if it happens with his current GF, then I'll be at the church 24/7.;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang!Zoom! Posted March 31, 2012 Author Share Posted March 31, 2012 I'll be the very best kind I can...which is easy to do from this distance I guess. :) Any tips on what makes a great mother in law other than silence and gifts of cash? lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MamaT Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 I've had that happen twice so far, but it was my guys doing the proposing. Best advice - love them for who they are, and only give advice when asked! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayne J Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 Congrats!! :party: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quiver0f10 Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 Congratulations! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 Congratulations!! Our oldest daughter was just married a few months ago. They became engaged last October, and we were very happy for them. They did both ask for permission and our blessing first, so it wasn't a surprise. They live 5,000 miles away, so we do a lot of emailing and Skyping. They're coming to visit though in three weeks! When will your daughter get married? Have they decided yet? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang!Zoom! Posted March 31, 2012 Author Share Posted March 31, 2012 No details other than a shot of the ring she sent on the phone. She was sobbing and trying to pull it together, phone call only lasted about a minute honestly. She'll catch up with me later I suppose. I could barely understand her. Did I really just detail clean my cell phone? :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
prairiegirl Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 Congratalations! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
usetoschool Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 I'll be the very best kind I can...which is easy to do from this distance I guess. :) Any tips on what makes a great mother in law other than silence and gifts of cash? lol Love him as if he were your own, add a son instead of lose a daughter, and stay out of their lives unless asked for advice. Oh, and learn to share. Dividing my daughters time between us and her in-laws is really hard. Congratulations! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tex-mex Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 :hurray::hurray::hurray: Congrats! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AmyontheFarm Posted March 31, 2012 Share Posted March 31, 2012 Congrats! I have a suspicion that I'm about a year behind you. Looking forward to the advice given here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ecclecticmum Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 (edited) I had a whirlwind romance, and was engaged 1 month after meeting my guy :001_wub: or possibly less. When I told my parents, I got a "told you so" out of my father, and my mother was surprised, but took it in her stride. I always said I would never have children & never marry, and if I hadn't met DH, I probably wouldn't. I was very adamant. Basically best thing to do for all involved, is to act like my parents do, and not like my in-laws. In-laws: -Criticise everything about me -Constantly nose into my business -Have made me cry on several occassions after doing the subtle digging at me all day long. -Constantly interefere on their rights about what we should do, they dug at me whilst I was sick till I had no option but to allow them to take my dog to the pound. My parents: -Said openly how much they love DH, that hes a great guy, sweet, perfect etc. Constantly extol his virtues - Let decisions be up to me. If they disagree, they keep it to themselves. Like I am aware my father was not for homeschooling, but its because "i know him". He did not say anything against homeschooling, and just kept his mouth shut. - If I ask for advice, they glady offer it, elsewise they keep advice to themselves, UNLESS it is more like an idea, "oh, we put a frame up above the desk to write notes on" etc. -They don't interfere, badger or anything, but if I ask for anything at all (no, not talking money lol) I mean if I ask any questions, or for any help, any advice, they will gladly provide factual advice without getting too personal. They are basically there for me anytime I need them, but they don't interfere. Basically, always be happy for your child, laugh & hug her, and be there if she needs you. And make the fiance feel a part of the family :grouphug: Edited April 1, 2012 by Ecclecticmum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elfgivas Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 oldest dd became engaged about five years ago. we were in australia, she was in san francisco. she told us over skype. we were all excited and happy..... and a little sad because she was there and we weren't, and because its a big "next" step in life..... we love our son in law. we also really like him a lot. but fwiw, so many people kept asking us if we liked him. we had already decided that it didn't matter one iota if we liked him or not; they were engaged, she was happy, and it was our job to love them both. things that have helped: finding things we all enjoy to do together, asking his opinion on things and listening to what he says, letting him know when he does something we really appreciate, thanking him for taking care of our daughter, and for bringing her to see us..... saying "yes" as often as possible to suggestions, invitations, etc... not being negative with him or about him, exchanging gifts and news with his parents.... :grouphug: ann Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ecclecticmum Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 oldest dd became engaged about five years ago. we were in australia, she was in san francisco. she told us over skype. we were all excited and happy..... and a little sad because she was there and we weren't, and because its a big "next" step in life..... we love our son in law. we also really like him a lot. but fwiw, so many people kept asking us if we liked him. we had already decided that it didn't matter one iota if we liked him or not; they were engaged, she was happy, and it was our job to love them both. things that have helped: finding things we all enjoy to do together, asking his opinion on things and listening to what he says, letting him know when he does something we really appreciate, thanking him for taking care of our daughter, and for bringing her to see us..... saying "yes" as often as possible to suggestions, invitations, etc... not being negative with him or about him, exchanging gifts and news with his parents.... :grouphug: ann Where's the like button? +1 :D Love this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JenneinCA Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 I did that. I was in New York. My parents were in California. I called on Halloween night and told them I was getting married. It was an interesting conversation. They met him for the first time later that year when he flew out to California over winter break. My Dad commented later that he was going to like my husband-to-be because I had already chosen to get married. He was extremely happy that my husband-to-be was actually a person that he liked because it made things so much easier. We will have been married for 19 years in May. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tress Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 Congratulations! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jennifer3141 Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 Congratulations!!! :D What a wonderful, bittersweet feeling that must be. Are you wandering around your house today flashing back to the little girl? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
besroma Posted April 1, 2012 Share Posted April 1, 2012 Congratulations! I once read a story about a MIL who gave her DIL a book of recipes for a wedding gift. The book was full of recipes written in her handwriting....her son's favorite family recipes. What was particularly endearing was the note she wrote inside to her DIL telling her that she welcomed her into the family, and that even though these were her family recipes, that she expected the DIL to add her tastes and to adapt them in any way she wanted. I know this is for a DIL and you are gaining a SIL, but maybe there is something similar you could do for your new SIL to show your acceptance of him into your family. My parents treat my husband as a son, special cards on special occasions, special gifts on birthdays, etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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