acurtis75 Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 Also, I should add that we made sure we have more than adequate life insurance coverage so that whomever has to care for dd would not be under a financial strain because of the responsibility. Otherwise, we wouldn't have been able to ask the people that we did because they have several children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teresa in MO Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 We have 10 kids and an age gap of 20 years between the oldest and the youngest. We only have 4 that are not adults, between the ages of 9 and 15. They will go to their sister's if something we to happen to both of us. She made sure her dh knew and agreed to this when they married last year. If something prevented her from doing this, they would goto another sister. Same thing with her dh. We have also made sure their would be more than adequate life insurance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joyofsixreboot Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 Now that we have and 18 and 19 yo they are the lucky winners if we kick. My brother is in charge of helping them manage any money we leave until the oldest is 25. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elisabeth in IL Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 We asked a non-family member to be the back up plan if my parents weren't able to take the boys. That conversation happened 13 years ago. We need to update our will as I haven't spoken to my out-of-state friend for over a year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
athena1277 Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 Ugh. I have thought about this question, but dh and I have not talked about it since dd was very young. We couldn't quite agree at the time, so it's never been put in our wills. Both his brothers are married, have kids and plenty of money to take them, but we don't agree with them on church and the kids would be put in ps, which we would like to avoid. Dh's parents are out because his mom has a rare disease that causes severe migraines and when she's having a bad day, she can't care for kids. FIL goes on mission trips (it's part of his job) for 3 weeks at a time. It just would not work. My parents would take them, but they both work, so kids would be in ps. They would probably even have to go to after school care because of the jobs. My choice would be some dear friends of ours who share our values, including hs'ing. I'm just afraid that family would be very upset if the kids went to them. A very tough situation indeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wheres Toto Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 My oldest, who is going to be 18 next month, would take her brother and sister if something happened to both dh and I. She would have the assistance of my mother with handling finances and any other help she may need. There is enough life insurance she would be able to pay off the house and have no financial problems for quite a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
OrdinaryTime Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 I'm the eldest of seven; my husband is the eldest of nine. At one point early in our marriage, we suddenly realized that if our parents passed away, we would have legal custody of A LOT of kids! We made sure both of our parents never rode in the same vehicle at the same time. Seriously. We've made one of my younger brothers in charge of decisions regarding our children and the estate. We both trust him completely. He lived with us for about two years, and he knows our kids better than anyone else. Plus he is the most responsible, most level-headed, and most virtuous person I know. We have had non-family members ask us to become guardians of their children in the case of their deaths. I did not find it weird but, in fact, was very touched and humbled to realize they would trust us with their children. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SweetMissMagnolia Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 no I've done it.....we don't feel comfortable that anyone in dh's family raising our son (none are really able to either)--it would either be one of my sisters--or a cousin who has kids about the same age.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
J-rap Posted March 9, 2012 Share Posted March 9, 2012 (edited) Our children are all older, but since my husband is temporarily -- maybe for several years -- unable to care for our children as a parent, I decided to address this with our only child who is still a minor. I had three people in mind: my married son and daughter (who are still quite young: 22 and 23), and my sister. I just had this conversation with my youngest daughter recently, in fact. I asked her who she would feel most comfortable with for the next several years, because the advice and love of a guardian would go beyond age 18, as far as I'm concerned. She made the decision herself that though she would love to be with her sister or brother (she has a great relationship with them), she would feel that my sister was most like ME, her MOM, so that's who she would want to be with. I've discussed it with my sister and now I just have to remember to change our will! Edited March 9, 2012 by jjhat7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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