Swim class - keep going or give up?

[BarbecueMom]

We signed our boys (almost 3 and 20 months) up for swim classes at the local rec center. I thought it would be a good way to get them out of the house, used to swimming in an indoor pool, and familiar with a structured group situation (after a library story time fiasco that resulted in one child being terrified and hysterical and the other dumping over trash cans).

 

When we got there for the first session, most of the kids were fussing about going in the water, but were fine when they got in. Mine were okay with getting in the pool, until we told them they could not use the water slide until the lesson was over. Both kids whined and fussed and screamed and squirmed on and off for the entire lesson, but made it through and went down the slide.

 

We thought things would be better for the second week. We prepped the oldest all morning on how we were going to the inside pool, and once we played the games, he could go down the slide. He was excited until we opened the door from the locker room to the pool. He shut down and had a meltdown. We tried to calm him down and took him into the pool for the lesson, but after 10 minutes he wasn't calming down and was upsetting the other kids, including my youngest. Sitting poolside was no better, as he was flailing around and truly to throw himself on the concrete. We left. He was perfectly fine once we got in the locker room, but would not go back to the pool.

 

Normally, I would just chalk it up to normal 2-year-old stuff, but mine are the only ones out of about 30 kids aged 1-3 acting like this! The other kids sort of cling to their parents, but don't mind the cutesy games. Mine wrestle out of my arms in the water, still screaming.

 

I'm sure part of it is sensory overload (it bothers me and I'm an adult!), part being told "no slide yet", and part boredom because they swim often and don't have a fear of being in the water. Given all that, we're torn about continuing the lessons. It's pointless if they're just going to freak out, but we spent the money on this and perhaps they will get better. DH wants to quit, because he'll do anything to get out of wrestling an angry toddler (failed back surgery and an ingrown toe that looks like someone tried to amputate it).

 

I see his point, but I'm still torn. Should we keep going? Just take the youngest? Or quit all together?

[ChristusG]

I find that the whole group swim lessons thing tends to fail more than it works. I put DD7 into swim lessons there when she was about 4. She learned nothing. And her class wasn't even that big. I can't believe a toddler class would have 30 kids in it!

 

So I put both kids into ISR lessons....they could swim after only a few weeks! It was well worth the money. http://www.infantswim.com/

[Dawn in Ohio]

I would quit. I don't find swimming lessons for this age very profitable.

 

And regarding the bad behavior, this is a hard setting to successfully address the bad behavior.

 

I would ask whether you can get a refund. When my 5 year old burst into tears the first day of swimming lessons, the director said I could talk to her about a refund if he couldn't handle the class.

[nono]

30 kids? Forget it. NO swim class should have more than 6-8 kids, and that's when they can swim somewhat!

 

We did Mommy & Me for 4 summers, and my ds put his foot down about no more of that this summer. He's right. He starts semi-private lessons this weekend with the local swim coach this weekend.

[Dobela]

It depends on the child. My son was in lessons by 2 and swimming independently by 4. My dd is 4 and will barely get in the water, let alone swim. But my son's class never had more than 10 kids and the ratio was always 1:3 of teacher to student.

 

Let me give you another perspective on this: Are most of the other kids in day care? Are they accustomed to the parents dropping them off somewhere and leaving them? If so that would explain why they may cling but don't get as upset as yours.

 

I would finish what you have paid for and then look for something that they may enjoy more - say toddler gymnastics or spmething else. I would also continue going to the library. Once they are used to th eroutine there it should get better. Believe me, I have seen and heard about much worse at the library here. Your kids are still very small. They will learn as they grow and it will all be just fine. Evey mom has times where the kids are embarassing or hard to handle in new situations.

[G5052]

As I posted on a previous thread, mine never did well with the preschool/early school activities, particularly my oldest one. They did better with informal play and such. So that is what we did.

 

And it honestly didn't make a bit of difference in the long run. You would never know the difference between my kids (now as tall as I am) and kids who had a lot of formal preschool programs.

[BarbecueMom]

I find that the whole group swim lessons thing tends to fail more than it works. I put DD7 into swim lessons there when she was about 4. She learned nothing. And her class wasn't even that big. I can't believe a toddler class would have 30 kids in it!

 

So I put both kids into ISR lessons....they could swim after only a few weeks! It was well worth the money. http://www.infantswim.com/

 

I didn't really think they'd get anything out of it, as far as swimming instruction. I assumed since they love other pools, they'd have fun here. We aren't members of the rec center, so I didn't realize the shallow end had a kids slide and large classes. It's actually two classes, two instructors per class, 1-2 years and 2-3 years. But with four instructors, 30ish kids, and 1-2 parents per kid, it's a little overwhelming.

 

Plus, there are three other swim classes (older kids w/o parents), private lessons and senior swimmers leaving when we get there, and another round of classes afterward! It's mild chaos.

[tabrizia]

Really sounds overly chaotic. even 2 instructors for 15 kids with parents with 2 classes going on at the same time in the same place seems like it is still going to be chaos. Our pool won't put more then 4 kids in each class though.

 

We don't start swim lessons until 3 so that they go to the class by themselves, and we watch from the side. Before that we figure we can just play with them in the pool ourselves and get as much out of it as they would out of swim lessons.

 

I might try one more time, but if the kids aren't enjoying it I would probably just chalk it up and quit.

[vonfirmath]

My 3-year old just finished swim lessons for the year. They have 1 instructor, 4-5 kids a class. I wasn't sure how much he got out of the first (Turtle) class, but he's DEFINITELY gotten better at swimming after this second (Starfish) class! It's not swimming like I would call it (strokes, kicking, etc). But he can propel himself in the water and control his own movement to some extent. Definitely better than when he started. I am pleased.

 

There was one other class going on in his part of the pool, plus a larger "Mommy and baby" class that was taking up a whole chunk and the swim team doing laps in the other half. But it did not seem at all chaotic

[eewaggie99]

I was in this position. My children would completely melt down at swim lessons. We tried for a couple years, then quit because I was tired of forcing the issue.

 

Last year, we found a wonderful woman who gave private lessons and my children have improved dramatically. There is no difference in their swim ability versus children who've swam for years.

 

I see something similar in dance. The age of seven or eight is when children make great leaps in fine motor skills so waiting a few years won't hurt your childrens' swim ability later in life.

[gardening momma]

Are the parents in the water with their kids? If not, that's 7.5 kids per instructor, which is way too many for that age. At our YMCA swim classes, there are no more than 5 kids per class for the 3-5 yr old group. In the 6+ yr old group there are 8 kids per class. They do have a "mommy-and-me" type swim class for up to 2 yrs old.

 

I've had my kids in swim at the ages of 3 and 5, and now this summer at ages 5 and 7. My 7 year old is getting so much more out of swim lessons at this age than she did at age 5. My 5 year old is doing a little better than she did at age 3, but she was still unable to pass her class because of lack of confidence in the water.

 

I would advise waiting a couple of years before trying lessons again. I'd just try to get many opportunities to go swimming informally with the kids in the meantime.

[BarbecueMom]

Are the parents in the water with their kids? If not, that's 7.5 kids per instructor, which is way too many for that age. At our YMCA swim classes, there are no more than 5 kids per class for the 3-5 yr old group. In the 6+ yr old group there are 8 kids per class. They do have a "mommy-and-me" type swim class for up to 2 yrs old.

 

I've had my kids in swim at the ages of 3 and 5, and now this summer at ages 5 and 7. My 7 year old is getting so much more out of swim lessons at this age than she did at age 5. My 5 year old is doing a little better than she did at age 3, but she was still unable to pass her class because of lack of confidence in the water.

 

I would advise waiting a couple of years before trying lessons again. I'd just try to get many opportunities to go swimming informally with the kids in the meantime.

 

Yes, parents are in the water for these two classes. Plus, there are three more age groups without parents having class, with 8-10 kids each in those classes. You can't hear anything but water and my kid yelling, "Aye, aye, aye!!!", which is his way of indicating that he's freaked out about something.

 

Again, we really didn't think they would learn much swimming-wise, but they usually love the pool. We thought they'd enjoy swimming "inside" once a week (and the class fee was cheaper than 6 weeks of admission fees), but once again misjudged what our kids will meltdown about. Oh well. They have runny noses today anyway.

[Photo Ninja]

It was a good idea, but there are way too many people in the class.

 

I suspect your dc would do much better with small group lessons of no more than 4 children per instructor. More students than that usually results in little to no learning to swim and tend to be a waste of money unless the child is swimming well and is just perfecting strokes. Your youngest will probably be fine learning early skills at a Mommy and Me water class. The student:teacher ratio is ridiculous in the situation you signed up for, and with the way indoor pools usually echo, I can see why your dc would get overwhelmed. My dd was horrified at the number of children per instructor in your class. She teaches swim lessons to babies through adults, all ability levels, and their swim school maxes out at 4 children per teacher for a 1/2 hour lesson. Sometimes they have an aid as well, making the ratio 2:1.

 

Are there any other places where your dc can take swim lessons (places with a more realistic student-teacher ratio)?

[gardening momma]

It was a good idea, but there are way too many people in the class.

 

I suspect your dc would do much better with small group lessons of no more than 4 children per instructor. More students than that usually results in little to no learning to swim and tend to be a waste of money unless the child is swimming well and is just perfecting strokes. Your youngest will probably be fine learning early skills at a Mommy and Me water class. The student:teacher ratio is ridiculous in the situation you signed up for, and with the way indoor pools usually echo, I can see why your dc would get overwhelmed.

The OP has clarified that the class is a mommy and me class, as the parents are in the water with their children. Whether the pool is too busy in general is another issue. At our pool (YMCA), there are always other classes going on, but it is not too crowded or too noisy.

[bettyandbob]

If this is a parent child class and your boys are used to getting in the water and playing with you, I don't really see the point of the class for you, particularly for the 3yo.

 

Does the rec center have group classes for 3-6 yo without parent in the water with no more than 4 or 5 in the class? This is the next step for your 3 yo to take. I teach group lessons to preschoolers and I do get them to (depending on level) get over fears, begin to glide, float on their backs, begin to swim on front, tread water, and really swim. For progress, you need an organized instructor with good time management and behavior management skills, and you need to be consistent about attending lessons and clear with you dc about your expectations for behavior during lessons. I do not off the slide as a reward every single lesson--it takes time to get everyone down the slide and that is time I can cover skills. I tell parents that for progress the child needs to swim in between lessons and that is when the child can go down the slide. Out of an 8 session class we might hit the slide 3 times. I haven't had a tantrum from a child or a complaint from a parent.

 

Once you've settled on actual learn to swim lessons, as opposed to orientation to water, you need to consistent sign up for lessons. Going 2 months and taking 2 months off will put you right back where you were at the beginning. I have students who go Fall take the winter off and then in the spring can't be placed in the level they previously made it to in the fall because they've been out of the water.

 

Anyway, if you are in the parent child, I think maybe just take the younger one.

[PentecostalMom]

I find that the whole group swim lessons thing tends to fail more than it works. I put DD7 into swim lessons there when she was about 4. She learned nothing. And her class wasn't even that big. I can't believe a toddler class would have 30 kids in it!

 

So I put both kids into ISR lessons....they could swim after only a few weeks! It was well worth the money. http://www.infantswim.com/

 

I agree that ISR is much better than group swim classes. However, they are also cost prohibitive for some. My older dd did a complete ISR course in '09, then a refresher last summer. She is now in the Red Cross Learn to Swim classes, and just graduated from Level 2 yesterday. It sounds like these in the next quote because they have similar names. There are "preschool" classes, which is probably what the 3yo below is in, my dd (thanks the the knowledge from ISR), was placed in the LTS (Learn-to-Swim) even though she was not "of age" because she had the skills necessary to complete that level. I am currently doing ISR with my dd that will be 20 months on Tuesday.

 

My 3-year old just finished swim lessons for the year. They have 1 instructor, 4-5 kids a class. I wasn't sure how much he got out of the first (Turtle) class, but he's DEFINITELY gotten better at swimming after this second (Starfish) class! It's not swimming like I would call it (strokes, kicking, etc). But he can propel himself in the water and control his own movement to some extent. Definitely better than when he started. I am pleased.

 

There was one other class going on in his part of the pool, plus a larger "Mommy and baby" class that was taking up a whole chunk and the swim team doing laps in the other half. But it did not seem at all chaotic

 

 

All of that being said....from what I gather the issue for the OP is to finish, or not to finish. With all the drama and stress for the parent, and if the intent wasn't for them to learn to swim, I would see if the rec center would give a refund, or a credit to be applied to something else. Just explain the situation, and hopefully they will work with you. When older dd was younger, I signed up for a swim class at the YMCA, only to find it was a mommy-and-me class which was pointless for us because she had no fear of the water, she wanted to learn to swim. The Y gave me a credit and we used it for something else. Good luck with the decisions!

Edited July 1, 2011 by PentecostalMom

[black_midori]

Drop it :)

 

They are too young to talk with you about it very clearly, but my 4yo got him point across (finally) last year!

 

I tried him in his "first big-kid swim class" last summer and it was a BOMB. He was already perfectly at ease in the water & enjoyed the games sometimes, but after about half the classes he just decided he did NOT want to do it anymore. He started a few minor tantrums, which he normally doesn't do, and I pushed and pushed and made him keep at it.

 

After forcing him to go & dealing with "issues" for 2 classes, I left early one day & took him home & put him to bed. The next week, I asked him "do you want to go to swim class, or would you rather spend the entire 1.5 hours of the class/driving time sitting quietly alone in your bedroom?". HE CHOSE THE BEDROOM!! This from a boy who HATES to do that sort of thing and generally LOVES to swim... he'd rather sit in his room for excruciatingly long (for him) periods of time than suffer going?? He must REALLY not like it! I just didn't even make him go to the last class, and I'm not blowing my money on ANY more of that sort of thing until he actually asks me to let him be involved (he really wants to do cubscout camp with bro next year, but that he the absolute first thing he's ever genuinely wanted to do).

[baileygirl]

I would probably stick with it at least with your ds2, especially since you indicated that ds1 was setting off ds2. I should add though, I am a big believer in swim lessons. We started both boys at 1.5 in a parent/toddler class and then moved them up to semi private lessons at 2.5 (well ds2 is 2.25). My ds2 can swim/rollover/swim across a pool or just float on his back and kick across the pool. I love watching him during the lessons, because he has the cutest smile/look of pride on his face during the ENTIRE lesson! DS1 was doing freestyle (with side breathing) and backstroke at 3.5 and at 4.5 is pretty close to getting his butterfly stroke down. We usually do swim lessons year round, once a week for 30 minutes and play in the pool when we can.

[nd293]

I'd quit. I had a dd who adored water and loved lessons from the start. She was swimming unaided by 3yrs. Ds loved lessons until about 10 months, when he started hating them, and we stopped. Once he got to the age where he could play in water without someone holding him, he refused to let me take him out of his depth, but was perfectly happy to play on his own, lose his footing and go under etc. We started ds in swimming lessons at aged 4yrs (6 months ago), and he is doing well. He is certainly not at the level dd was at the same age, but he is confident and making progress. I am against children going to swimming lessons when they are unhappy, not just because I think it's bad for the children themselves, but because it is very disruptive to other children. I have been on both sides of that particular fence!

[BarbecueMom]

I would probably stick with it at least with your ds2, especially since you indicated that ds1 was setting off ds2. I should add though, I am a big believer in swim lessons. We started both boys at 1.5 in a parent/toddler class and then moved them up to semi private lessons at 2.5 (well ds2 is 2.25). My ds2 can swim/rollover/swim across a pool or just float on his back and kick across the pool. I love watching him during the lessons, because he has the cutest smile/look of pride on his face during the ENTIRE lesson! DS1 was doing freestyle (with side breathing) and backstroke at 3.5 and at 4.5 is pretty close to getting his butterfly stroke down. We usually do swim lessons year round, once a week for 30 minutes and play in the pool when we can.

 

Other way around. The one turning 3 this month is overly dramatic. He's prone to laying down in parking lots before going into the grocery store. If we kept going at all, the 1-year-old is less fussy about it, but still wasn't having fun.

 

It's a moot point now, I guess. They both have bad coughs this morning and the little guy is running a fever. I think we'll just stop and wait until they are older. Thanks for the advice, all!