has anyone started HS with a reluctant DH?

[kwickimom]

Hi all! first post here. I have 3 kids....dd7 ds4 ds2

I never in a million years thought I would even consider homeschooling, but lately it is all that is on my mind. I really want to start ASAP.

My DH is a little hesitant. Its basically the old what about socialization, and think what they will miss from not being at the public school stuff. Nothing too serious, and I feel that if we discussed it more he would agree to let me try it for at least a year.

 

Anyways, I am hesitant to begin if he is not 100% onboard and I was just wondering if anyone else jumped on the HS boat without their DH being all for it? How did that go?

[Jean in Newcastle]

Many of us have started with a reluctant Dh. And many of us have started with a one year trial. And many of us have won over our dh.

[May]

My dh was reluctant but I told him it was only going to be for one year. After one year, he was probably more pro-homeschooling then me. We took it year by year. I'm very type A, so planning and carrying through wasn't a problem. I was only homeschooling one dd so I thought I had it easy compared to many of the people who post on this board. :)

[Sharon in SC]

Hi all! first post here. I have 3 kids....dd7 ds4 ds2

I never in a million years thought I would even consider homeschooling, but lately it is all that is on my mind. I really want to start ASAP.

My DH is a little hesitant. Its basically the old what about socialization, and think what they will miss from not being at the public school stuff. Nothing too serious, and I feel that if we discussed it more he would agree to let me try it for at least a year.

 

Anyways, I am hesitant to begin if he is not 100% onboard and I was just wondering if anyone else jumped on the HS boat without their DH being all for it? How did that go?

 

Oldest dd (now 17yo) was heading into 1st grade. I knew we should (homeschool), he was not so sure. On a date to make a decision, I finally said, "It's first grade. How bad can we mess up first grade?" He replied, "Well, when you put it that way, OK." Halfway through the first year, he was at least as big an advocate of homeschooling as me. We're now completing our 11th year and have a rising senior in Eden Academy.

 

Happy decision making!

[Mejane]

Many of us have started with a reluctant Dh. And many of us have started with a one year trial. And many of us have won over our dh.

 

Yes to the trial period. Seven years later, we're still homeschooling, and hubby is now fully on-board.

[Dana]

Many of us have started with a reluctant Dh. And many of us have started with a one year trial. And many of us have won over our dh.

:iagree:

 

My husband was hesitant because he was worried about me burning out.

We've had some really rough patches during the two years - at one point I was checking out ps requirements online earlier this year. Dh is more convinced than I am that homeschooling is the best choice for us at this point :D.

 

So a one-year trial is a really great way to go.

 

Good luck!

[susancollins]

This year was my 1st year my daughter Carrington went to Kindergarten and Preschool in a private Christian school. My husband was reluctant and thought homeschoolers were a bunch of weirdo’s who kept their kids locked away. I did 1st grade with Carrington and Preschool with my son Jackson who just turned 5 in January. My husband is now my biggest supporter and advocate. He tells all of his friends, family and people at work how proud he is of me and the children. I think it takes a little while getting use to the idea of homeschooling. Take him to a homeschool conference. Join a local homeschool group and show him that you have many outlets for socialization. I think homeschoolers have more socialization and better manners that most kids in public school. This is an exciting journey! I have embraced homeschooling by taking things day by day and trying to remember the big picture of how I want my children to turn out. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. :001_smile:

[fairfarmhand]

I did!

 

I think he was just humoring me at the time. Now after talking to his friends who have kids in public and private school, he is a huge fan. I was considering putting the kids in in a year or two last fall and he acted crazy. I couldn't figure out why, and he told me that he loved homeschooling.

 

Sometime in the past 7 years he made the switch and NEVER told me!

[cdrumm4448]

My dh was not for it at all. My kids attended a small Catholic school until I finally convinced him our ds was not being challenged at all. He's better about it now. He was against homeschooling our dd because she's so shy and he thought she would have problems making friends if she wasn't in school, but recently he's had a complete change of heart. My dh is no longer a supporter of the Catholic school, or Catholicism in general now.

 

I felt vindicated when I heard my ds's second grade class was seated according to ability. One advanced kid next to a kid who is behind. The advanced kid is responsible for keeping the behind one on task and helping them learn the material. How is that challenging for the advanced kid?

 

So, my dh has really had a change of heart. And you never know where it will come from.

[StartingOver]

LOL I started 22 year ago with a reluctant husband. And again last year with a new reluctant husband. But when each of them saw what all the children learned, that we really did get out of the house, that we could take vacations in the off season, that there wasn't any running around like chickens with our heads cut off delivering kids to this thing or that. No hours of banging our heads over homework, etc, etc, etc.

 

They both came to see the light LOL.

[....]

Yep, been there, done that. Got the T-Shirt.

 

My husband was scared and we had a "trial run".

 

:D We must've been convincing, because my husband is a big supporter now!

[Purpledaizy]

I'm going through that now. Its also part of a deeper issue in our marriage. It seems, sometimes, my own ideas to do things just don't get credit until he hears about it from a *professional* or someone he respects as being more intellectual than me :( very disheartening sometimes. He's been a little more on board with it since someone he works with said she did it for a few years.

[Karen in CO]

I wonder how many of us started out with "How bad could we mess up in one year?" I started reluctantly myself but knowing it was best for my ds. Really how bad can you mess up middle school when he's already failing, thinks he's dumb and ready to get suspended because he fought back? I figured that if he did nothing the rest of the year, he'd be better off, and of course he was.

 

Convincing my dh turned out to be easier than convincing myself (which I'm still doing years later).

 

Really, you can't mess up their education in one year unless you try really hard. :)

[kwickimom]

Thank you all for your stories. I tend to really take to heart what my DH says or thinks, and yet he thinks I dont LOL anyways I am scared to do this without 100% support. he is now to the "how bad can we screw up a year stage" right along with me :001_smile: I guess I am only a tad more gung ho than he is, so I think it will be OK. Education was never important in his family, no one even made him think he could go to college. So I explained how this further their education by them geting one on one help.e is just VERY resistant to change, and mean even the littlest change like new furniture arrangement, or new dinners. He freaks, so this is a HUGE step for him. SO SCARY!! lol I go back and forth from being excited and wanting to cry. Nothing is set in stone until I dont register them for school in the Fall, but we are set on 100% decision by June 15th so i can start July 1st (I am babysitting in the fall and want to be all set with our plans and schedule and have the kids a little ahead so we can all transition as smooth as possible)

[sleepymommy]

I suggest asking him to read "Dumbing Us Down" by John Taylor Gatto or read it to him during a road trip (this is what I did, as dh is never interested in reading for fun).

 

This book is was dh's deciding factor to be onboard with homeschooling.

[Crimson Wife]

Both of my IL's are teachers (now retired) and DH was successful on a traditional academic path. So he was very skeptical about HS at first. One of the things that helped persuade him to give HS a try was an article in the alumni magazine of our alma mater about how the school loves homeschooled applicants. Bear in mind that our oldest was only 4 at the time :lol:

 

He always hems and haws when we have to make the decision about whether to commit to HS for the following school year. This year he insisted on DD taking a standardized test (optional in our state) before he would say "yes". But the results came back fine and he did agree.

 

I'm hoping that by a certain point he'll get fully past his skepticism and stop the whole "will we or won't we" business.

[Dmmetler]

My DH was/is reluctant, but was willing to try it for a year. I think most of his worries come from the fact that I have cerebral palsy, and he knows just how tired I am on my "bad days"-and is concerned that with DD home full-time I'll push myself too hard. We'll see how it goes now that we're actually into it.