Thoughts on Another Seatbelt Issue

[abcinnc]

The other seatbelt post on double-buckling reminded me of another issue we have had. My daughter has gone on a few youth outings with our church youth group on the church's fifteen passenger van. She told me that she thinks only she and the front seat passengers wore seatbelts. Our pastor was the driver on one occasion and even his own kids did not buckle up. What would you do? I hate to stir up trouble, but I think the church should require seatbelts for all passengers. By the way, we are located in NC where there are seatbelt laws, but I'm not sure how they apply to fifteen passenger vans.

 

Thanks,

ABC

[Perry]

Every passenger in the vehicle should be buckled, for their safety and everyone else's. They are a danger to the other passengers in a collision.

 

I would have a conversation with the pastor, and if I didn't have a guarantee that everyone will be buckled, my kid would not be riding. Period.

[astrid]

What would I do? Never allow her in the van again unless EVERYONE is buckled. Seat belts save lives, period. I would also have very little respect for a pastor who put the lives of kids in such danger. HE might be a careful driver, but you never know who else is on the roads. It only takes one tragic accident and NOBODY"S life will be the same.

 

I have to say I'm really taken aback by the double-seatbelting. I'd really never heard of it until I read that thread. Seatbelts were designed and tested to have ONE "occupant." If you have more kids than you have seatbelts for, well, then maybe you either need another vehicle or you need to leave some home.

 

But then again, I"m a firm believer in seatbelts, NO exceptions. I lost my brother, who was my only sibling and a year younger than I to a senseless car accident when he was 17 and I was 18. Three other passengers in the car were wearing seatbelts and walked away. Joel was not wearing his and was killed. If he'd had one on, he three friends who were in the car with him would not be suffering the horrible survivor's guilt that they have/do, my dd would have an uncle, I would be an aunt, and my whole family would have been spared horrific grief.

 

With my family, seatbelts are non-negotiable. I'm sorry, but this is the ONE TOPIC that I will preach until I die..... YMMV.

 

 

Astrid

[gingersmom]

The other seatbelt post on double-buckling reminded me of another issue we have had. My daughter has gone on a few youth outings with our church youth group on the church's fifteen passenger van. She told me that she thinks only she and the front seat passengers wore seatbelts. Our pastor was the driver on one occasion and even his own kids did not buckle up. What would you do? I hate to stir up trouble, but I think the church should require seatbelts for all passengers. By the way, we are located in NC where there are seatbelt laws, but I'm not sure how they apply to fifteen passenger vans.

 

Thanks,

ABC

 

You hate to stir up trouble??

 

You could be saving lives!!

 

I am just constantly amazed at how people disregard laws because they may be inconvenient for them.

 

There is no chance I would let my child step foot in that van. And I would also want to know who is driving the van.

[Tutor]

I would not let my child ride in the van unless everyone is buckled and I would let the pastor know that he could be putting the church in big trouble with their insurance company if he doesn't require that everyone buckles up.

[elegantlion]

The car does not go into gear until everyone has buckled up. That's the rule in our house. I would bring it up without guilt or delay.

[athena1277]

When I was a teen, we often rode in those type vans. We never buckled up. No one cared if we did or not. We enjoyed sitting backwards or sideways, visiting with our friends on a long trip. Seatbelts were not an issue.

 

Fast-forward may years....After being in more than one accident (only minor injuries) and having 2 children that I couldn't bear to lose, I would sooo make my kids wear a seatbelt. I would also raise a big stink if necessary to get all the other kids buckled to. I would rather be the bad guy than have the guilt if there is an accident and I didn't say anything.

[kpupg]

I'm surprised they can get insurance that doesn't specify seat belts for all.

 

Oh, wait, maybe they forgot about insurance, too ... ?

 

Well, I would be wondering. And I agree with the other posters -- no seatbelts, no go with us.

 

Karen

[Harriet Vane]

This is worth fussing about.

 

I have a cousin who died at the age of 10 because she wasn't belted in. ALL of the other passengers (7) walked away with bumps and scratches, but this little girl died.

 

Just bring it sweetly to the attention of the leadership. Persistently. Repetitively. Until it is a policy that is followed.

[FO4UR]

I'd bring it up to the pastor! It's a MAJOR church liability....in addition to the needless risk of life. One wreck can not only end a life, traumatize a family...but completely tank that church (financially and legally). Obviously, the lives in that van are much more important to me than the liability of the church.....but speaking in those terms might turn a light-bulb on somewhere.:glare:

 

My dh hs served as a youth minister many years, and has driven MANY-a-15 passenger van and he would NEVER NEVER NEVER take off on the road with unbuckled seatbelts. He made it a light-hearted silly thing to be the "bad guy" on the issue by doing a break check before leaving the parking lot.....any kid not buckled was evident (no one was harmed in these break checks LOL....but a few kids who faked a buckle were found out) We actually had a tire blow out once - and I nearly peed my pants out of fear...not b/c I was actually scared for my life....but b/c it dawned on me that these kids have MOMS and DADS who are trusting ME with their precious cargo!!! 15 lives past before my eyes!!!

 

Honestly - if the pastor even gives the hint of brushing this issue off....I'd be calling a deacon to set up a meeting between deacon, me, my dh, and the pastor.....if that gets no-where, I'd bring it up to every single parent in the group. If it were my kids, I would want to know.

[MamaT]

We live in NC and drove a 15-passenger van for several years. The seatbelt laws apply.

 

I would speak to the pastor. He should know better - it is a great liability for the church, not to mention very UNSAFE for the kids he's transporting.

[keptwoman]

By not making all the kids wear seatbelts he endangers everyones lives, including your child who is wearing a seatbelt. Unseatbelted people are missiles in a crash and one of them may very well hit and kill a seatbelted person. It's quite simply unacceptable.

[skaterbabs]

First of all, this is EXCEEDINGLY dangerous. NEVER, EVER ride with an unrestrained passenger. In a crash that person could kill you.

 

Second, they are violating the law. Should the worst happen the church would be held liable for any injuries/deaths. Unfortunately, this is more likely to cause compliance with seatbelt laws than the safety issue. :rant:

[abcinnc]

I agree with everyone who has posted. I did want to mention that my daughter who has ridden in the pastor's personal mini-van said all of his children did buckle up in it. It is almost like "they" think it is o.k. not to buckle in the fifteen passenger van. I will definitely say something to the pastor. My daughter has only been out with the group twice in the van and she will not be going again unless this is resolved. Thanks for all of the advice.

ABC

[Melissa in Australia]

here in Australia, the driver would be fined for everyone not wearing a seat belt. I am not sure how much the fine is, but I think it is well over $100

[mrsrevmeg]

I'm considered the meanie among our youth group because I demand that every passenger be buckled. Do whatever it takes to get the kids buckled. Talk to the pastor. If that doesn't work talk to whomever holds the insurance policy. Ask a police officer what the fine would be if he van were stopped and had unbuckled passengers. Bring it up again and again until it is written in the policy concerning trips. It is a horrible thing when people are in a crash and die. It is more even horrible knowing that their death could have been prevented.

[japhmi]

By not making all the kids wear seatbelts he endangers everyones lives, including your child who is wearing a seatbelt. Unseatbelted people are missiles in a crash and one of them may very well hit and kill a seatbelted person. It's quite simply unacceptable.

:iagree:

[Sebastian (a lady)]

I would be having a frank conversation with the youth pastor and making sure that he and all of the staff agreed that 1. Everyone needs to be buckled every time. 2. An adult will make sure that all teens are buckled every-time, not just tell them once and expect them to obey for the rest of forever.

 

I don't think that this is an option for youth groups like church or scout groups.

 

It puts the group leadership in the position of demonstrating that rules and laws and prudent behavior don't matter if you want something else instead. It also teaches the students that you don't really stand up for what is right if it means disappointing someone or getting someone upset. In other words, hurt feelings trump what is right.

 

Not really the sort of thing that I'd want to be teaching my teens.

 

I would however, try to soften the discussion by asking if I could either help provide transportation for the next few events or help organize fund raising for another vehicle so that everyone had a seat with a belt (assuming that any of the issue is not having enough seats). If it's just an issue of not wanting to be the baddie - I mean the one who shows them how a leader follows high standards - then there are other problems afoot.