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AlmiraGulch

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Everything posted by AlmiraGulch

  1. I suppose, but I was not raised in an area with gators but I still knew about them. I would have thought that was as much common knowledge until I read this thread, frankly. It never occurred to me that it wasn't. Then again, I could have selective memory from my years of actually living in FL. Who knows? And like someone else said, it's more of a case of freak accident than common occurrence or regular, general threat, based on the history of gator attacks in florida, and gator behavior in general. I don't know. I see your point, but it's not so clear cut to me. Regardless, it's horrific, and I'd be shocked if they didn't do something different going forwarrd.
  2. I do think that Disney will work quickly to come to some sort of financial settlement, but I'm not sure they're culpable here at all. Think of it this way. You go to an ocean front resort. Part of the beach is "private" beach, but only separated from the public spaces by cones or some other device. You take a dip in the water and, lo and behold, a shark bites off your leg. Is the resort responsible, because you were in the "private" section? It's the ocean. They can't keep out the sharks. That's pretty simple. To me, it's the same sort of scenario here. It's one of the most horrible things I've heard in a long time, and I'm trying hard to not think about it too much, or put myself in the water with that child (as if I were the parent), because it's gut-wrenching. But honestly....I'm not sure that there is blame to be placed here. It's a wild animal in a body of water. It happens, even if the body of water happens to be on Disney property.
  3. Bumping, because I've had some people mention to me that they could no longer find this thread and wanted to help. I'm another that will vouch for Pinky. Unfortunately, every word is true, and then some. My heart is breaking for her and for her amazing family.
  4. Plants/flowers like this don't have to be planted all together, but the do look better when in small groups. I would put at least three of each kind together in a cluster. You CAN put them all together. That would be dramatic. You can see examples of how it looks as you drive by the fronts of apartment buildings or entrances to nice office parks where the landscpapers will put, for example, a dozen or more of a taller, maybe large-leafed plant in the back, then the same dozen or more of a shorter flower, then more of the smallest, colorful in front. You don't have to, but it looks nice. I'd just focus on groups of plants, not one-offs. How many is entirely up to your own aesthetic.
  5. I followed you pretty closely, so you get an A+ for following all of my nonsensical posts! Just for clarity, there are five sisters and one brother. I'm only really talking about 4 of the sisters here. I think your letters match up with my naming convention in the following way: Sister A: Oldest, Dreadful Sister Sister B: Zombie Sister Sister C: Me Sister D: Best Friend Sister A and B are besties. A does not speak to C, D, or the other sister. We're all fine with that. We don't want to speak with her, either. Ever. A and D were quite close at one time, but that was over decades ago. B and D were extremely close at one time, and it wasn't decades ago, but it has been many, many years. More than 10, I'd say. They do not speak now and likely never will. Tons of resentment and anger on both of their parts, and neither of them forgives easily. That said, I am not B, and I am not D. It is pretty well known that I just am not one that holds onto things like that. I think it's unhealthy and causes me anxiety. So, I forgive, and I move on, and I accept that things can be different but don't have to be completely gone forever. For me, there is gray area. That's why I think you're probably right, primarily because of your point #4. I just don't hold on to things like this, generally. It's not in my nature. So I did tell her that I accept her apology, and I mean it. Now I just have to decide if I want to let her into my life again. I'm now leaning toward just having a coffee or something with her and reevaluate how I feel after I see and speak to her live.
  6. I'm not concerned with the kids because they're nowhere near close in age. Hers are much older than mine...adults with kids of their own. Yes she and the controlling sister are very tight. In fact, as evidence of her controlling nature, my sister had to call her own daughter to get my phone number, and daughter said to her "Aunt Awful is going to be pissed." I do think she's sorry. She sounded very forthcoming, with no hint of defensiveness, or "but," or anything like that when she spoke. She owned what she's done. If I do meet up with her (and I'm still 50/50 on what I"m going to do), it will definitley have to be in a public place, in neutral geography, for a short period of time. I will never let her in the way she used to be, but that might be ok, too.
  7. I agree with all of this. I just don't know what I want. No one can tell me, I realize, I just like the thought-provoking questions, comments, and experiences I get here. Helps me look at things through different lenses.
  8. 1. Zombie sister and Dreaded sister (I love that title!) are as close to each other as Best Friend sister is to me. 2. To be clear, my relationship is great with my mom. She stays neutral, for the most part. Openly, at least. The problem with our mom is that she always champions who she perceives to be the underdog or persecuted, and in this case zombie sister has painted herself in that light. It's crap, but my mom doesn't hold it against me. She has talked to me about it, and she knows about the phone call, and zombie's admission of guilt. 3. I don't know, and I guess that's why I'm struggling. 4. The issues between BF sister and Dreaded sister all came about as things that happened in the past. They have had no contact in...I don't know....decades, maybe. They never will. Neither is willing, and because Dreaded sister continues her crap, and continues to manipulate relationships between the rest of us (or has tried to, anyway), there is no hope there. BF sister will probe for information, and I'll give it to her. I don't keep secrets from her. If I decide to have contact with zombie sister, BF sister will be the first to know. 5. I guess the best case scenario I can think of is that we'll at least be cordial. Maybe I can let go of some of the dread I carry from the loss of the relationship. Maybe when my parents eventually move to here (4 of us live in the same state, but my parents do not) and move in with zombie sister, because they will at some point since she has the space, I'll be able to see my parents without having to be completely uncomfortable. Maybe I could go see my niece and brand new great niece when I'm in New York this summer. Are the risks worth it? That's what I'm trying to decide. As a matter of principle I think that people need to mind their own busines when it comes to other people's relationships with people For years I was close with zombie and BF sort of chided me about it, but I would tell her to butt out and let me handle my business. It was fine. Never came between us before, and it still shouldn't. The reality is, it might now. So do I stand on principle and go see zombie? Is it worth the risk? I can't answer that right now because I can't think all the way through to what could possibly happen as a result of my meeting up with zombie.
  9. Oh my gosh, that's awful! I don't understand how people can treat people that way. I wouldn't even do that to a stranger, much less a family member. Even the ones I can't stand! I'm so sorry. She was never cruel to me in that way. There were times that weren't great, where I felt very marginalized, and it hurt. When I confronted her about it, she basically said oh, well. Really. She didn't seem to care. On the other hand, the vast majority of our years have been great. That's what makes it hard.
  10. But I want you to tell me what I want to do!!!!!! :-)
  11. Yes, thanks for this. I don't think there would even be a hint of discussion about the others anyway. She knows I will protect my BF sister no matter what. I have always been very clear with the "your relationships are yours to manage, mine are mine and none of your business" message, but given the circumstance I simply wouldn't tolerate it. I'm sure she would say the same if I were to speak negatively about the oldest.
  12. Yes, I do appreciate that. There was no hint of excuse in her words. No "buts". I believe it was sincere. I think the bottom line is that I would like to have a relationship with her, but one like it used to be, and that's not even possible.
  13. I understand. I'm not at all interested in facilitating anything between any of the others. I've done that before, and it was quite successful, but it wasn't my issue to begin with and I probably just should have stayed out of it. I'm a firm believer that people own their own relationships, and that's that. So, I don't care to ever have a relationship with the eldest, but I don't care if anyone else does. They're lives, their relationships, theirs to manage. I'm not even a tiny bit up for a big family saga, and it would be one, kwim? In this case, my concerns are: 1. I just don't want to set myself up to be hurt that way again. I don't have to, I realize. Relationships change, and maybe there could be one, just different than what we used to have. But the risk is still big. 2. Best friend sister. Frankly, my relationship with her is more important than reconnecting with this one. Like I said, I spoke with her, and she did not try and tell me what to do. She wouldn't. She knows that I know how she feels. I just don't know if trying to have some sort of something with this sister is even worth the possibility of the BF sister having discomfort and negativity because of it. I realize that she owns her own feelings and thoughts and reactions, but it's in my power to protect her from that right now. All of our kids are grown, and have never been close anyway (mine are significantly younger than theirs) so the cousins relationship isn't so much on the radar.
  14. Not really. I don't think there would be anything short-term about it, and I don't have the time, money, or inclination to open wounds that have long since scabbed over. I really didn't have much of a desire to have this one reopened, but she did it, and here it is, and now I have to figure out the best way to heal.
  15. Do you engage, or do you run and protect yourself from the zombie? Here's the deal. She and I were extremely close for most of our adult lives. I don't know if she actually has any personality disorder, but she is completely controlled by our oldest sister. That one (the oldest) is awful, and I never have had, nor do I ever wish to have, any kind of relationship with her. The two of them are super close. About 3+ years ago, this sister stopped talking to me. Just...stopped. We live close, and we'd always shared most holidays together, hung out a lot, spoke frequently, etc. Then....nothing. Part of the problem is that I'm extremely close to yet another sister, and the two of them do not get along or speak, so I believe I suddenly became gulity by association or something, via the manipulation of the oldest crappy sister. So, 3+ years of this one not speaking to me or to two other siblings, telling our mother "I don't know why they're so mad at me," crying "woe is me," basically. My mother bought right into her crap. I was hurt for a long time, then really angry, and then I just mourned her and our once great relationship as if she were dead. Two days ago, she called me. She told me she was sorry, she misses me, she loves me, she admitted I hadn't done anything wrong, and that yeah, I was sort of guilty by association in her mind because she pretty much hates my best-friend sister so much. So she's not interested in a relationship with the other two she cut off, both of whom I'm close with, but she wants one with me. I said I have spent years mourning the loss of her, but I don't see any way we could ever have any type of relationship we used to have because I don't know how I could ever trust her again. I also know it will cause drama with best-friend sister, who would never tell me what to do (because she's not a controlling freak), but who did tell me that she's concerned this other one is trying, and will continue to try, to come between us. What do I do? Right now, I've decided to do nothing. I have always fantasized about running into her in a store somewhere, or while I was getting my hair done (we go to the same place), but I never have, and don't know what I would have done if I had. I also miss her kids and my great nieces, one of whom I haven't even met because of this. Still, I can't decide if it's worth the risk. Please give me some perspective, here.
  16. For context, I have a rather full bust (36 DD), but my sister (34 B) wears these, too, so I don't know if that makes a difference. My favorite are the Vanishing Back. I wear the back hook with underwire. My sister wears front hook. I don't know if she wears wire or not. CAn't remember. I also love the Embraceable line. It's my second favorite. Again, I wear full coverage, back closure. P.S. I know you didn't ask, but I swear if they ever stop making vanishing edge underwear I'll cry. Best. Underwear. Ever.
  17. All of my bras come from Soma. That's it. I've found a couple of cuts that I like and I can't imagine buying any other at this point.
  18. Chalk me up as another who cannot stand mouth noises. At all. Not eating, not kissing, not any of them. I'm not even talking about over the top noises, although those are intolerable. I mean just normal eating or light kissing or whatever, including my own. It's awful. I also hate socks. All socks. I think I have foot claustrophobia or something. I wear them when I have to, but then I can't wait to rip them off at the end of the day. Repeated loud beeping noises drive me into a frenzy. Trucks backing up, or alarm clocks or smoke detectors...you get the picture. I think I must have died in a fire or been run over by a reversing truck in a past life or something. I have a bit of a tape addiction, but only Scotch brand tape in the green package. I love the way it smells and I love the way it feels when I stick it to my hand and then peel it off, over and over. I'm always taking strips of tape and rolling them into perfect cylinders (it's not easy...go ahead and try it...I dare you...perfectly lined up edges? No way can you do it. haha!), then I stick the cylinders together and end up building these elaborate honeycomb looking things that people find all over the house. It's gotten to where I really just can't keep it in the house. Too distracting.
  19. I noticed Obi Wan's voice during that sequence the second time I saw it.
  20. I just saw it again yesterday, and I have a question. Who is the old guy that had the map to Luke? The one in the village that Kylo Ren killed near the beginning.
  21. At first I thought Rey was Han and Leia's, which I still think could be the case. Then I thought Luke's, which of course I still think could be the case, but I still lean more toward Han and Leia if she's one of those. What Luke and Leia have another sibling, and Rey is his/hers? Hmmm....
  22. We can't line dry laundry in our neighborhood, either. I can't really think of any strange rules. The only one that bugs me is no veggie garden, even in your own back yard. I live in a town home, but seriously, particularly if someone fenced in their yard, why would I care if they grow vegetables? We pay $525 a year to the Master Association (they take care of, among other things, the pool and tennis courts, and all common areas that don't belong to a sub-association. Plus, we pay $105/month to the sub-association. That covers landscaping (lawns, pine straw, landscaping/flowers in common areas), doggie waste stations, roof repairs, exterior home maintenance, and a host of other things. I think it's a fair amount.
  23. Very nice! I love the sleek design (I spend hours in those kitchens at IKEA), and all that light makes me envious! I live in a townhouse, so one whole side of my house has no light, which is stupid because I live in the end unit, so I really could have windows if I wanted. Anyway, my kitchen is sort of small, galley style, but at least I have a window on one side. I'd kill for all that light you have now.
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