This thread is SO cruel to someone on a diet lol. I started looking because my oldest daughter's birthday is coming up. But I had to stop looking- I still have a couple more weeks, and it was just making me hungry and making me crave chocolate. :P

Yeah a cash bonus would be nice! I agree; either that or a gift certificate.

We just made butterscotch chocolate chip cookies, and they were delicious! We used this recipe: http://www.food.com/recipe/toll-house-butterscotch-chip-cookies-16110 but instead of just butterscotch chips, we did half butterscotch chips and half milk chocolate chips. They were SO good, everyone who tried them really loved them!

NOTE: DECEMBER'S FUNNY QUOTES CONTINUE HERE! I RAN OUT OF ROOM TO ADD MORE TEXT TO PAGE 1!!! --- The following quotes are from the "I Hate Decorating Cookies" thread started by Janna on 12/18/10. There were multiple funny quotes in here, so I'm just going to start throwing them out there: "Every year is the same. In my head, I think this is going to be great fun. We're going to bake cookies together and decorate them. There is a fire in the fireplace, it's snowing outside, Christmas music is playing, everyone is polite and respectful, I'm wearing an apron and smiling like June Cleaver, while the kids are smiling and sharing. The realty? There is no music because the noise of the kids making "Vrroom, Vroom!" noises with the decorating tips is too loud. There is snow, but it's a pain in the butt because the dog keeps bringing it in on her long fur. There is no fire because I don't want to spend the money on the gas it uses. I don't own an apron . The cookies are baked the night before which is fine, except a batch burned. One child is in the way at all times breathing on the frosting, asking for red and green and where are the sprinkles? Is the red made yet? What about the green? I said I wanted green, too! Can I use these sprinkles? ooo! I want to use this! No, I wanted to use that! Is the green done, now? Then the children begin their frosting. Using decorating bags for the first time, they don't listen to my direction on how to hold and squeeze, therefore frosting oozes out the top. They don't listen to my direction to just use very light pressure, so the cookies are bombarded with a cup of frosting..." -Janna "Occasionally, we could pull it off but most of the time, he fed the dog unbaked or baked cookies, decorated the dog's nose with frosting." - Liz CA "I do think you forgot to mention the red Christmas trees, slobber, fighting, and sugar coated table that even after 5 thorough wipings is still sticky." - Dawn in OH "I never use squeezable icing because my nerves cannot take it. The first homeschool cookie decorating thing I hosted at my house, my family was left stranded with nasty looking cookies covered with huge mounds of icing. My dh was incensed at the waste. (yes I also saw kids LICKING the decorating bags! gross). All the other years, the cookies are pre-iced and the kids can put sprinkles and candies on them. And every mom is REQUIRED to take home the cookies that their little darlings decorate (an sneeze on)." - Fairfarmhand "I have never used squeezable icing before this year with them either. I did it because the picture with them using a knife is just...gross. *dip the knife in bowl, plop frosting on cookie. Release cookie from hand to lick fingers. Take licked finger to get frosting off of knife. Lick finger. Pick up cookie with wet fingers. Spread the frosting. Lick the knife. Put knife back in bowl and repeat.*" - Janna "I decorate my OWN batch of sugar cookies later. For those guests who prefer NOT to eat a cookie with a pound of muddy colored frosting and a half cup of sprinkles on it." - DianneW88 "A few years ago I did gingerbread houses with them, I think there is a beer by my hand in every photo and it was like, 10am!! I used to hyperventilate at the though of it and I feel bad because I had the same vision in my head you did. Apron, fireplace, music, light snow falling, fa la la la la, and oh screw that." - Lizzie in MA (Ladies, I have to tell you, you've kind of made me extra glad to be Jewish. Jews don't *usually* do holiday cookie baking. :D) --- Cheryl in SoCal: "Why can't Catholics use tampons?" ThatCyndiGirl: "Because they are Satan's Little Cotton Fingers." KatieH: "Unless you're masturbating with it, there's no reason Catholics can't use tampons." 12/18/10, Explaining Female Cycle To Young Boys thread. --- Enjoy!

Did you manage to find out? lol. It was in a thread called "The Cosby Show- Any Warnings?" You can search The Cosby Show and find it, it was just asking if there was any reason it wouldn't be okay for kids to watch. I will try! :) You know, I've seen references on this board to "channeling Doran" but I have NO idea who/what that is! I did consider that, but then some of the threads got kind of heated and I wasn't looking to further or dredge up any old arguments, I just wanted to post the funny stuff without causing any drama. :) That IS funny! Do you have a post title/date for that? If so I'll add it to the list! I will try. :) I'm glad you all enjoyed the thread! I will continue adding to this month's so keep checking back onto page 1 for further additions! And if you come across anything you want me to add, feel free to post it or PM me or whatever!

Or maybe you could just backtrack if you needed to and say "Remember when we learned about X country? Well, look at this..." and then show them the Little Passports thing. Or vice versa... "Oh, remember we learned about this with Little Passports? Now we're going to learn more about it..."

Yep, something like that would have been totally acceptable. The way she worded it was definitely obnoxious!

LOL I love it!!! That's hysterical! The one this year is very nice, you have a beautiful family! But last year's...? Yeah, you're never gonna top that one LOL.

:iagree: (except I really haven't ever had anybody look at me like I've lost my mind, that I've noticed. "Excuse me" usually works for me). (ETA: Which is not to say that she should have used a snotty tone about it)!

That's hysterical! :lol:

I almost quoted you again, Nakia, for the puking/table dancing thing, but then I just couldn't bring myself to quote the movie theater post yet.again. lol. (But feel free to be funny elsewhere)! haha. :)

I want to see it!

Here, too- grocery store or dollar store or party supply store.

I voted that I would return whatever is left after I finish using it. With that said: The person I'd end up borrowing a food item from would be my brother and sister-in-law who live up the street. And they borrow from us as needed, too, so I figure it all evens out in the end. We do once in a while borrow a non-food item from our next door neighbors (it's probably come up 2-3 times in more than a 4 year period, and they have borrowed something from us once or twice as well). I, too, can't imagine keeping what's left if I did borrow a food item from someone; like someone else said, what if they need to use some before I can go to the store to refill/replace? I'd always return what was left right away.

LOL okay okay I'll add that part back in. I've added several more quotes, you guys are on a roll today!

Well, the special ed person called me back! She said that they DO have to take her back and that I will NOT have a problem re-enrolling her when i return! All I have to do is bring in her birth certificate and two proofs of residence and maybe fill out a form when I return, and that she will have no trouble getting right back into the school. And I won't even have to have her do school-assigned work while we're away having fun since she won't be enrolled in school during that time period. :D She asked that I just send in a note saying that I will be exercising that option so they have a heads up, and that was that. So it doesn't seem like it will be a big deal, and hopefully she's right/being forthright about this.

I always tip $3.00 plus whatever the extra change is, to meal delivery drivers. I hope they don't spit in my food for that. :P How gross!

<commiserates> How annoying! They need to get things straightened out over there! :grouphug: I remember when my daughter was much younger, like elementary school age. Apparently I had three absences where I had called but forgotten to send in the sick note that made it all official. And I got a letter from the school demanding that i "return child to school immediately!" I was pretty flabbergasted because said absences were MONTHS apart... she WAS back in school.... the letter was so stupid, and, like you, I found myself thinking SHE'S MY KID!!!! Who do you think YOU are?! lol.

That dog must be SO relieved right now. Then again... her poor nipples. :lol: They sure are cute, though!

Right, I know... I just hoped it would also work in my favor... that they'd be more lenient with absences for a specific reason since she doesn't legally HAVE to be there anyway. And this has never come up before, it's a one time thing. So not like I've been taking advantage, I mean. Yeah, makes sense. I hope so! I'm hoping to get confirmation on that. I guess so. I hope that doesn't happen! She'd be bored/lonely staying home all day with just me and her younger siblings, she likes to be with peers and she does a work mentor program and so on at school. She wouldn't have as much opportunity from home, in her particular case (says the homeschooler). I really don't have any relationship with them at all. I don't know any of their names and doubt any of them know mine.

Could someone give me an opinion as to sending this letter to the superintendent of my district...? --- December 17, 2010 To so and so, re: (my daughter's name) Dear Superintendent, My daughter, Melissa (lastname), is a student at (school). She is in a life skills class there. Melissa is an 18 year old girl (who will turn 19 in January), so she is not of compulsory school age, but will likely remain at the (school) until she reaches the age of 21. Recently, I sent in a letter to my daughter's teacher explaining that our family is planning a vacation to Florida in February/March. Melissa would be flying down with her father's sister, who lives in NY, and who wants to take Melissa and her cousins down to Florida to vacation and visit some theme parks during President's Week. At the same time, my husband and I are planning to drive down to Florida ourselves, to visit family. Melissa's aunt would drop her off to us at family's house after their vacation, and Melissa would spend the rest of her vacation with us. We will be visiting with an aunt, uncle and cousins who we only see once every few years. They have a large property, orange groves, and so on. When we leave there, we will be driving to another part of Florida to visit with my mother-in-law, who we only see once or twice a year, and spending some time with her. While we are there, we will be going on various educational outings and field trips. Melissa would have the opportunity to spend time with family, particularly family she does not see often, to attend various outings, to see people, places and things she does not normally get a chance to, and so on. After visiting each relative for 1 - 1 1/2 weeks, we will drive home again. The letter I sent to Melissa's teacher was referred to the principal at the (school) and then turned over to the district as the (school) was not sure how my request should be handled. The issue, apparently, is that Melissa would end up missing 16-18 school days when all is said and done, including visiting with family time and travel time to drive back and forth. As such, I have been informed that the district will NOT approve this request, as students are not allowed to be absent for more than ten days. I was told that I would need to disenroll her from the school/district and could then re-register/re-enroll her when I returned. I wanted to clarify with you that this IS my only option. I did read in The Pennsylvania Code the following: § 11.24. Unaccounted absences. Students whose names are on the active membership roll, who are at anytime in the school term absent from school for 10 consecutive school days, shall thereafter be removed from the active membership roll unless one of the following occurs: (1) The district has been provided with evidence that absence may be legally excused. (2) Compulsory attendance prosecution has been or is being pursued. Authority The provisions of this § 11.24 amended under section 1317(a) of The Administrative Code of 1929 (71 P. S. § 367(a)); and sections 1327, 1330, 1372, 1511 and 2603-B of the Public School Code of 1949 (24 P. S. § § 13-1327, 13-1330, 13-1372, 15-1511 and 26-2603-B). Source The provisions of this § 11.24 amended December 19, 1986, effective December 20, 1986, 16 Pa.B. 4874; amended October 22, 2004, effective October 23, 2004, 34 Pa.B. 5798. Immediately preceding text appears at serial page (252441). I am wondering if the fact that Melissa is not of compulsory school age could be considered sufficient evidence that her absence may be legally excused? The absence would be more than 10 days, but would be well under the three months that students could be granted temporary absences for when it comes to illness or "urgent matters" and/or perhaps could be considered some sort of temporary alternative program. I would be willing to do some schoolwork with her while we were away, and/or to work with her teacher on ways in which "life experience" can be transferred into school credit. If there is no way around this and there is no choice but to disenroll and re-enroll Melissa when we return due to strict policy as opposed to legality, I am willing to do so- bringing in the necessary paperwork, refilling out necessary forms and so on. However, I would like confirmation/reassurance as to the fact that she WILL be able to re-enroll without a problem once we return. I would not want to return and go to fill out the forms etc only to be told that there is no longer a place for her or some other reason why she won't be taken back at her age, etc. Please reply at your earliest convenience. Thank you, myname

Thanks for those suggestions! The teacher already agrees that it would be good for my daughter but it's the "district" (I don't know who there exactly) who vetoed it. When I count up actual school days that she'd miss, it's going to be between 16 and 18 days. And I would have done school stuff with her or things that would count toward the life skills as suggested here, but I guess that won't matter if my only option is to remove her from school and then re-enroll her when we get back. I'll see what else the special ed supervisor can tell me when she gets back to me.

:lol: Too funny!

And FYI all, when I come across more funny December posts, I'll be adding them to my first post on the first page (assuming it will continue to let me edit that page). So check back there periodically, I've already added a few more since I first posted this. :D

:lol: