Cat play can seem pretty mean. If they groom and curl up with each other I wouldn't be worried about their relationship. Stefanie

She doesn't have the muscle control just yet. My DD was the same with a similar timeline, and once she gained the muscle control, she has a bladder of steel. Keep her in pull ups for the dribbles and practice potty through out the day and give her some more time. You might also consider talking to a pedi and ruling out problems though. Stefanie

I don't see what is so confusing. It was stated that the text of the article was saying *all* people have some sort of bias....several people agreed with that and/or have stated no one was disagreeing with that. My statement focused on how, while no one disagreed there were biases from the other side, no one ever discusses the biases from the other side and what they bring to the table. But it is obvious your going to take exception to anything that is said on that matter so I think I'll just move on. And for the record, I absolutely believe the societal message to black males has been "go away, you aren't wanted" for a very long time. Stefanie

Well, since I just lost my long winded post, I'll just say never mind. I know what I mean but I'm honestly not sure I can effectively communicate it. I just know there are two sides to every story, both sides contribute something, and neither side can be ignored. I'm not even sure I could effectively articulate what those biases may be since I've see so little referencing them. Surely there are some, since everyone agrees that everyone has racial biases. I don't think you can separate them though, they have to be examined and worked on together. Stefanie

I actually agree.....I do believe that there are societal problems that are in essence unsolvable even if we all try to solve them. I just feel that these discussions tend to lose more people than they open up when they focus on just the white side of the equation. I think you get further along on the race discussion when the focus is more on the whole relationship. Stefanie

Yes, exactly what I was saying. I was just pointing out, these discussions don't ever really seem to discuss that and so, feel very one sided. Stefanie

I wasn't talking about the article at all, I was talking about how these discussions generally feel and how since we all want to agree there are unconscious biases affecting our thought processes, I think it would be more productive discussing the biases of both sides. All that ever gets discussed in these types of threads is one set of biases; the white bias against minorities. For those wanting to foster discussion about race and racism generally, don't you think it is just as important to acknowledge the biases being brought by all sides? Stefanie

I guess my biggest issue with these threads is that I feel that they tend to feel one-sided. Everyone throws out all the "bias" studies, says it isn't necessarily a conscious thing, and then attach it to a not-so-nice tone that generally comes across as: see, white people can't help BUT be racist. Surely the members of minority races are not immune from their own set of unconscious biases that have just as much bearing on a situation. I think a much more productive dialogue about racism would examine both sets of biases not just the one. Stefanie

I'm out. I've been running a low fever all morning. I only got up to go get the baby because DH was in a class. But now that I'm up....I'm going to slowly plod toward my goal of cleaning out the playroom. I want to go through unused toys for donation. Now I'm down to having to go through DD's room for all the rest of the parts.

Well played by your daughter.

Today, so far, is depressing. Last week the weather was so wonderful.....today, its cold and gray. I just want to hibernate. But, got up and out of the house returning library books and minor necessary shopping (I went down to the last diaper). Showed DD the changes to the play/home school room I made for her. I'm about to see if DH will put the baby down so I can finish up that project before gymnastics. When we get home from that we'll do school. I also need to request some library books to pick up for tomorrow. Stefanie

I've learned that it is nice to be done with B-day/Christmas shopping before Thanksgiving/Black Friday. I also learned that I'm glad we don't spend more time with the cousins.....cuz "Grandma laid an egg".

Didn't do anything all week. I had the opportunity to go with my mom to completely finish off Christmas/B-day shopping before Thanksgiving, so I took it, even though I sacrificed school. So, now, I only need to take my DH shopping to round out the baby's Christmas and to wrap a few gifts a night throughout December. Thanksgiving plans changed....we left early so we could do Thanksgiving on Wednesday night....and spent the evening with a kiddo that came down with Strep. Today is DD's B-day. The big 7. I also chose to spend some time this week cleaning out the playroom/home school room since it had become a bit of a dumping ground lately. I'm tired of doing school at the dining table so the goal is to get stuff cleaned up and re-organized for school on Monday. Between getting all the shopping out of the way and the school room cleaned, I'm hoping we'll sail right though December. Stefanie

Good luck. I am not a shopper ordinarily and I most certain couldn't ordinarily be paid to go Black Friday shopping. That said, two or three years ago my DH and I got conned into going with the whole family. The big Target door buster was the 50 inch TVs. We didn't show up to Target until 10 pm and walked out the door with two of them after they weren't claimed by midnight. Then we had the lovely problem of trying to figure out how to transport them home.....amidst Black Friday madness. It was pretty funny, all evening my DH was saying he was going to get one, and everyone else was telling him he was dreaming. Stefanie

Honestly, OP, I think I'd let the preschool handle this if the issue is isolated to the preschool. Take her in whatever shoes are comfortable and put whatever socks/close toed shoes you have in her bag and let them decide if this is something they want to die enforcing or work out their own agreement with her. Stefanie

If you are on BC for a medical reason, then you are on BC for a medical reason. There is a distinction and medical reasons would have validity in being covered. Trust me, it really isn't an overly onerous burden for the vast majority of people to pay OOP for BC. I've done it my entire adult life. Stefanie

I don't see how it is. Most BC isn't about yes/no to kids......its about when most people want them to arrive or not and whom they want them with or not. I don't have issues with people using BC, I have issues with being expected to pay for another person's intimate personal decisions. There just really is no way around that fact that a primary biological purpose of sex is to get pregnant and have babies. Stefanie

Birth control doesn't really have that much impact on life chances of individual children. Many crappy parents truly welcome babies and those babies go on to be "burdens on society" and many surprise babies have parents that completely step up to the plate of raising children and go on to not being burdens. Life outcome has more to do with the individuals involved than the circumstances of conception. Also, birth control is very far removed from developing some medical problem. The actions that necessitate birth control to prevent babies are (with one notable exception) completely driven by an individual's choices which are 100% in their control. That is not the case with most chronic and debilitating diseases. Stefanie

We generally just keep shoes in the car to put on just before going into places where shoes are required. A lot of times I put them on without socks or they are flip flops for the older. We are also in TX. It has been very pleasant short sleeves and shorts during the day weather here lately, except it does get quite cool at night.

My "ethnic" family ties are more to my state than country of origin. I currently live on and still own tracts of land that have been in my grandmother's family since around the founding of TX and several of my distant relatives on her side are related to some big names in TX history. Also, my DH has a relative who died at the Alamo. Family of origin is pretty far removed since we've been in the states so long, but on my grandfather's side, one of the relatives did a complete genealogy of the family from Scotland and Ireland, back to the 1400s, and self published for family members. One day I'd like to try to go see the ruins in Scotland since there is a lot of prominent family history there. Stefanie

Change your toothbrush after every sinus infection. Consider daily allergy pills at least until you get them under control. Mine are almost always allergy related. Restrict dairy because it causes mucus to thicken. And blow your nose as often as you can. Stefanie

Which is why health insurance tied to jobs is probably not the best plan? Employer based insurance came about when wages were being controlled in WWII as a way for companies to attract, retain, or compensate employees when they could not do so via wages. This works fine in a culture of employee loyalty, where everyone involved has the cultural expectation that generally employees will work for the same company for their entire careers. Not so much in a culture where there is no such expectation and the workforce is highly mobile. And anyway, what we have now is just flat out *not* completely insurance, it is something else. Insurance is catastrophic in nature. Stefanie

I have my own blanket which I tuck completely underneath me neck to feet; we do not share blankets unless I happen to throw part of DH's on top of mine. We also have a king size bed and I sleep within a couple inches from the edge and leave a good 6 inches in the middle between us (I don't move much). Also, DH works nights so half time I have the bed all to myself. Lights are my other big issue. Anything that blinks has to be put in a drawer or covered with a towel or shirt and full moons just about make it impossible. Kids are a big NO for me and I'll opt to sleep on the couch if they need to be in my bed. Hey, everyone has their one particular issue....mine is sleeping arrangements. Stefanie

Theoretically, if the majority of policies were sought by individuals there could be affordable mental health (like vision or dental insurance) rider or bundled plans that individuals chose in addition to whatever level of catastrophic coverage they wanted. I believe this is how those few self purchase plans work, they are just such a minority of purchasers they don't have good collective bargaining power over price. This type of model works very well for every other type of insurance, why is it so unacceptable for health insurance? What you are describing is one of the negatives to single payer and employer based health insurance where you are not the insurance company's primary consumer. Stefanie

But it doesn't fix the draft problem or the touching problem. I have to have my blanket tucked in around me from the neck down, if it becomes un-tucked (usually by DH's foot invading my blanket) I will wake up. Sharing a top sheet leaves me open to drafts when DH pulls it. Stefanie