I would also ask for more details about their social-emotional program. Is the stuff for 5-year-olds specifically for 5-year-olds. I would ask if I could see samples. I would ask what training was done by whoever will do this — did they go to a training, was it their major in college? I would ask if they have specific goals and how they will monitor progress (will it be by observation?). I would ask if with such a small ratio, they have a plan to transition kids back to the regular classroom size. I would ask if they are concerned about kids getting too dependent on the teacher with such a small ratio.

I would ask about the behavior needs of the other children. I would ask if they were trained in CPS (or crisis prevention or whatever it is called). If they are not, I would ask why not. I would ask how they handle behavior issues. I would ask how they inform parents. Consider stating in writing you want to be informed. I would ask if they have a policy on restraint and seclusion. Consider stating in writing you are opposed. Ask if they are doing the same academic level as in the regular classroom. I would ask if they have recess and lunch on their own or with the rest of the school. I would ask if they go to music and PE. I would ask if they will attend field trips with their grade level. I would ask how they will appear in the yearbook (are they their own class with their own teacher in the yearbook, or are they technically assigned to another classroom). I would ask if this is the home school for all the kids. I would ask what the next level is for kids who need a higher level of support (more for information in general than because it might come up for you — it’s an informative thing to ask I think). I’ll see if I think of more. I don’t know what his IEP looks like but I would ask questions about how they will follow his IEP.

I have done a mid-year move, with a special needs child, and it went smoothly, I hope it will go smoothly, but in optimistic. He’s young, too, which can help make school transitions easier. The new classroom sounds wonderful. I would not waste another thought on the old school, they are not worth your time or energy. I do think they sound like jerks!

I am glad I asked, because I am obviously far on the skeptical side, and not average. I thought I might be average, so it’s good to know. I also feel like there were things I was missing context on for the referral process, that are pertinent here. This is something where primary care referred to a specialist, and the specialist ordered a test. Now there will be another appointment with the specialist to get the results of the test. I think it’s going to provide major peace of mind.

I feel like sometimes medical referrals are given that are obviously not needed, and I feel fine about declining referrals I think are extremely unlikely to provide any helpful information. I am helping another person manage their medical appointments, and helping with transportation. Tomorrow morning I’m taking them for a referral I privately think is a total and complete waste of time. I haven’t said anything because, first, I’m not totally sure it’s a complete waste of time. Two, it seems inappropriate. Three, the other person feels like their concern is being taken seriously. I am wondering if most people just do all the referrals they are recommended? Or pick and choose? Ask more questions? I have not asked “skeptical” questions because it’s not my appointment, and the other person is not skeptical. So, I don’t know what would happen if someone did say something questioning the necessity of the referral. For myself I feel like I’ve said “skeptical” things and sometimes I get an explanation that is basically “yes you should do this” and sometimes I get more of an “it’s up to you” vibe. I just question if there is some conventional wisdom, for this, and what it is, I don’t feel like I really know.

When I lived at home, we went back to how things were when I was in high school. My mom always does the laundry, I always fold, I always leave the stacks of folded laundry on their bed. My mom always cooks, I will do whatever she asks and set the table. Sometimes she asks me to make a salad or part of a meal. I always clear the table and clean the table. My step-dad puts dishes in the dishwasher. I put away dishes if it’s not already done. I think I went back to my old chore of vacuuming, as well. I did not go on trips with them, I have gone on trips with them as an adult, though. When they went on trips I took care of all of the watering and I maintained my mom’s garden. I helped with yard work in general.

I don’t know all the details, but a young adult at my church is sharing a 1-bedroom with a roommate, and they work together at a grocery store. Both of them have special needs. They are doing well. I see this as an option for my son who probably does not have a lot of earning potential, but who I am optimistic will be employed.

When I lived at home: my parents wanted me to only save money, but I did a lot of the shopping and I paid for food etc when I went. My husband was on a military deployment so money or my life plans weren’t so much of an issue. We saved a big chunk of what turned out to be a down payment for a house. We felt very fortunate as many people we knew were either supporting their own parents and younger siblings, or did not have a stable background. I think I was also 26, and I had lived independently before. One of my oldest sisters, when I was a child, moved home in a situation of poor choices and disgrace, and she was working to save money so she could move out. If she did x, y, z my parents were going to kick her out. But x, y, z was all about seeing a boyfriend, and she stayed away from him. I think she was very agreeable, I spent a lot of time with her but I think she did avoid my parents. My parents had concerns about her spending for a while (and in this period) which caused them to not give her money and I think they were having her pay for her own expenses. I think it was the kind of thing where they were telling her “yes, you have to pay for car insurance, it is a must.” The job she had at the time would pay enough for her to have a 1-bedroom currently — she worked in a factory at the time and it paid more than some other things, these jobs still pay more than retail. My step-dad helped her to get the job, but she kept the job, and she could have “gotten” the job on her own, he just helped her to actually do it. She used to bounce checks, also, it really bothered my mom. However this is all far in the past and she has been a CPA for 20+ years, she started budgeting with an Excel spreadsheet 20+ years ago, etc. She ended up finishing college while working at the factory, and she worked at 7-11 while she was getting a masters degree, and then she has been a CPA ever since then.

I don’t know if every child will have the same situation. I found out recently that one of my sisters had mentioned moving home and my mom told her it wasn’t a good idea…. Before I moved home with my 1-year-old son, for a year. My mom had to call my sister and tell her that I would be moving home. The situation as I understand it — is that my sister had lived in another part of the country for 10 years, and didn’t really like her job. My mom thought it would be better for my sister to look for another job in her same area, where all her friends lived, etc.

Ironically if she started talking about her suspicions and things, she might sound like she were paranoid.

I have been following along with all the colors posted, and I have loved all of them!

It doesn’t have to matter for a bedroom, though. A bedroom can be a chance to do something different!

My step-mom would use ribbon like this, and make bows with a glue gun. Then she would glue a tie to the back, to attach the bow to the ribbon or the railing. I always thought it looked nice.

I have been difficult for my mom in the past. My mom needs to coordinate schedules with my middle sister, who needs to buy airplane tickets early if she’s able to come, before prices go up. In the meantime, number one, my husband’s work schedule was very iffy. Number two, my husband’s family leaves their planning until very late, they are all either pretty local or can drive, so they wait until fairly late to pick a day. In fact I think I always came with my kids, and it was just a question of exactly how long I would stay and if my husband came or not. If my husband didn’t come, I would want to go back so he wouldn’t be alone once he was off work. But it would stress my mom out, because she would commit to my sister’s plane tickets, without having a definite yes from me. With my husband’s family, too, there are certain relatives who only get together once every 5 years or something — if it turns out there are people driving in who only drive in every 5 years, that has been a priority for us and I think that’s fair, even though they do this with 2 weeks notice. However it has always worked out. But I think the main issue is just — my sister needing to buy plane tickets in advance. My sister also typically only comes for Thanksgiving or Christmas, never both, and she doesn’t come for either one every single year, though she comes often. If she doesn’t come for a holiday, she comes other times. In my childhood, my mom and aunt made the same plans every year, and so did both in-laws. Everyone could drive. My aunt did leave the evening of Thanksgiving to spend the next day at her husband’s, every year. But it worked out for everyone. The same with Christmas. So this airplane stuff and my husbands work schedule and my short-notice in-laws are all things she never had to worry about before. Edit: and since my parents’ divorce, my dad and step-mom always volunteer on Thanksgiving with a community supper associated with their church, and my mom and step-dad always host on Christmas and have whatever of their friends are available on Christmas Day.

I think it looks strikingly like Daenerys. The upper arm bracelet, and the top of the dress and that it’s sleeveless with a cape — it really looks like her to me. I don’t think it “has” to be her but I think it does look like her.

We also heard about posts rotting and my husband wanted to get posts set into concrete, I think. Edit: no, I think he wanted steel posts. I think that’s what it was.

I think it’s different with every set of people. I think it can be different with different grandkids. One of my sons didn’t like to stay overnight at grandparents once he was 6 or 7. He had liked it when he was younger! My daughter at the same time was spending two weeks at a time with grandparents and going more than once in a summer. Now we live nearby, and each of my kids has a night to cook with my parents, and my parents chose that because they could commit to it and thought it would be a good fit with my kids. They do different things with my sister’s kids, who like to be together when they are with grandparents. My kids like to be separate. It has changed over time. My parents (my mom and step-dad) are intentional but there are a lot of differences between my family and my sister’s family, and the kids like different things. There is no one thing they all like.

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I’m glad things are going better today!

I hope everything goes well today!!!!!!!!

I think I’ve had this, I had numbing gel applied and then a shot. I could tell a difference in my gums. Edit: my dentist calls it deep cleaning and my mom’s dentist calls it scaling. My mom has had it one time and she doubled down on her flossing routine, and has never needed it again. I don’t think it works like that for everyone, but it would be nice.

I re-read everything. My take is — put yourself and your husband first, and the overall family second. Worry a lot less about what your kids want. I think you sound like a very giving person who wants to do things in a good way for your kids, but I think that can be too much of a good thing. What works for you as a person, a spouse, and a parent has to matter more, because you have a leadership role in the family, and your well-being directly affects your children. There’s no long-term way to skip to meeting their needs and not taking care of yourself and your marriage and the big picture of the family.

I think it’s fine if they go to school. But whether they go to school or not, it’s not too late for you to change how you parent and change the dynamics with grandparents.

I think it’s two different things, to be difficult during negotiating, and difficult right at closing.

I think it’s fine to leave it. If they make an issue at the walk-through, then deal with it then. Edit: they probably won’t make an issue, and if they do, you will have more bandwidth to address it then.