I'm glad! I hate to add to your anxiety, but I'd rather you take this seriously. If it is MS, the sooner you start treatment, the better off you are. If you do not have MS, the sooner they figure out what you do have, the better. As for reading about MS, let me tell you about my son. His dx was a year ago tomorrow. We had been in the hospital for days and the MS dx was a relief. It wasn't lymphoma. What led to his hospitalization: nausea, vomiting, a numb from knee to toes, and a funny gait. The numbness was written off as a pinched nerve. The vomiting and nausea was due to a "bug". His gait steadily got worse, but no one thought to do a neuro exam until the admitting ED doc did one. That led to a CT, which led to them moving us to direct observation, which led to a transfer to a Ped's hospital, and so on. If you look at MS (not Pediatric MS, which does have a separate list of symptoms), no where do you see nausea/vomiting, the problem that took us to the ED (IV rehydration, 2nd time in 24 hours after vomiting for 6 days). The gait might have led to a neuro exam, eventually. My point is that no one person presents with MS in one way. It all depends on where the lesions are located. As for losing your mind, I totally understand! Kris SaveSave

Oh, honey! {{{hugs}}} Okay, like ktgrok said, this sounds like foot drop. As she also said, you can have this for many different causes. http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/foot-drop/basics/causes/con-20032918 Facts first: Weakness: Muscle weakness can cause problems such as foot drop (which causes toe drag), “vaulting†(a compensatory technique that involves raising the heel on the stronger leg to make it easier to swing the weaker leg through), compensatory hip hike, trunk lean or circumduction (swinging leg out to the side). Weakness in both legs is known as paraparesis; weakness in only one leg is called monoparesis. Weakness can often be compensated for with the use of appropriate exercises and assistive devices, including braces, canes or walkers. http://www.nationalmssociety.org/Symptoms-Diagnosis/MS-Symptoms/Walking-(Gait),-Balance-Coordination Also on that same page is information about gait disturbances. Have your husband look at them with you and see if you can determine your gait disturbance. They make braces to help (http://www.braceshop.com/braces-and-supports/ankle-braces/foot-drop-braces.htm) and medical insurance WILL cover them, IF you have a dx of _____ with a reason supporting the need for the brace. But, it'll likely be a fight. However, if you think about it, a brace is cheaper than a hospital stay or a repeat hospital stay. Were I you, I would ask your Primary for an order for an MR w/contrast, WITH MS PROTOCOLS. Since you aren't going to have to pay for it (if I understand your insurance correctly), I'd cut to the chase and go straight for the MRI. If you have to pay for a big percentage, then you can go cheap and get a CT. If something were to show up, then you can go back and get the MR. The "with MS protocols" is simply a set of time frames. It doesn't hurt if you are NOT looking at MS, but it changes the enhanced lesions significantly. ETA: I wanted to add...the MS protocols are important to determine if a lesion is active or not. So, this is important MS or NOT MS. If you have a lesion somewhere in your brain, it will show up as a spot on the image. After the contrast, the spot will have a doughnut shape enhancing the lesion, think of it like a target, a circle with a dot on the inside. If the spot doesn't enhance, then it is an old spot. I have 4 spots that do not enhance and have stayed unchanged for years. My son's MR's aren't so easy. You may not have MS. There are other explanations for what you are dealing with, however, if your insurance will cover the MR with little to no cost to you, I think you should plan ahead. If you go into the Neuro appointment with MR records that show NOTHING abnormal, YAY. He'll look at something else. If your MR images show something or doesn't show something, then you don't have to wait the 1-2 weeks for the MR and the radiologist to read it and the Neuro to get them and then get back to you. Even with the best of times, it takes us 2-4 weeks from the ordering of an MR to get the results from the Neuro. I've taken to requesting the MR disc and radiologist report 24 hours after the MR. {{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}} Please remember that there are other things, but I would take this seriously and be on the quick side. Kris SaveSaveSaveSave SaveSave

Ahhhhhhh!!! okay, your 16yo sounds like my 18yo! Were I you, with this last little bit, I would do nothing. Tell her that when she brings you a plan, you'll discuss it again. And then, I would do nothing. Kris

Hmmm, I don't think the question had a numerical answer. I think instead it has a _time_ answer. How much time is she allowed to commit to work per week? Since you already think she tends to over commit to whatever, I would have her sit down iwht you and spell out what you think is reasonable. You have $X, and need to earn an additional $Y. That is H number of hours per week, every week. Do you think this is something you can handle? (yes) What about last year when you were so stressed out? (no) I don't think you can either. I know it is hard to decide you cannot do something you really want, but what if you saved to do it another time? (is that an option?) Kris

I'm a strong believer in finding a way to say "yes", but it has to work for the entire family. Cost is double. Daughter, we can only afford $X (X can be what you currently pay or it can be any extra you are willing to put into it). (IF this next part is an option to your family...) We put $H to presents during the year; we are willing to put 1/? of H towards this cost IF you want us to. You are responsible with coming up with the rest. Are grandparents willing to contribute? If they are, require her to ask. Rather than telling your 16yo if she can or cannot do something, give her the tools to make the choice herself. Kris

Um, have you had a neuro exam, just the basic one that most doctors are qualified to give? I think you need an MRI or at minimum a CT of your brain. Everything you just said, described my 18yo son a year ago...right before he was dx'ed with MS. Kris SaveSave SaveSave

You know, one of the best things about boundaries and setting them is being able to rely on the boundary. In this case: you owe him ZERO explanation. Nada. Simply saying, "no" is perfectly acceptable. You don't owe him an explanation. And, I got to practice this today, too.....I had to address boundaries with my exh just this afternoon. It is my responsibility to _tell_ him the medical things that are going on. It is NOT my responsibility to make sure he understands what that means. Even more importantly, if you fail to ask any questions it is even LESS my responsibility. I am not a mind reader. I have to remind myself that the only response is facts: A happened on this date, and B happened on that date. good luck and your ex is being a jerk. Kris

a-day 2012: the day I realized I couldn't stay married anymore 11 Mar 2011: Tohoku earthquake (We lived south of Tokyo.) 7 Jul 2005: 7/7 bombings 26 Dec 2004: tsunami in south Pacific (We lived in HI.) 11 Sept 2001: all of it 3 May 2001: child born 12 Oct 2000: USS Cole 23 Apr 1998: child born August 1997: Princess Di dies 17 Jan 1994: Northridge quake June 1993: Lorena Bobbit (Sorry! I know I shouldn't....but I remember it.) 17 Oct 1989: San Fran earthquake 1 Aug 1981: MTV started (My next door neighbors were teens who babysat me. I remember it very well; school started the next week.)

Nightelf, may I make a suggestion? I would ask your son to take 1 online class. Why? What would your argument be? a) The class is online. It changes the stress level. Yes, there IS a stress level. b) I love dreams. Even dreams that fail are GOOD THINGS!! Allow him the opportunity to learn all of the skills, one small piece at a time. Now, I don't have a lot of time...I have 2 essays due tomorrow (and I haven't started either yet--- :glare: :leaving: )... but, http://www.snhu.edu/online-degrees/bachelors/bs-in-game-programming-and-development SNHU is a decent university and has an online program. Yes, this is an expensive alternative, but the point is to get his big toe in the water...online. Look at your local school's online catalogue. You might have a course to do there. Sometimes, small successes create motivation to do something you otherwise would never try. Kris

I don't have time today to read all the responses....so if I'm repeating, please forgive him. My ds18 is ASD (Aspie) too. I've known for years, since about 14, that he was going to need a reality check. A huge one. I started talking to him about expectations and boundaries. Mine. His. Later, after my divorce, his father's and so on. My expectations: after graduation/around 18 you will: ~ Work full-time: your work can be school OR a job ~ Pay rent: _I_ will cover your "rent" if you go to school full-time and get decent grades. Why? Because _I_ find value in your education (why we HS'ed in the first place---he is currently in online school). _I_ am allowed to choose where my money goes, just like you are. If you school part time, then you will work the other part time AND pay rent to that percentage. (50/50 school/work = 50% rent) ~~Rent will be 25% of your income. ~ Within 2 paychecks, you will pay ALL of your bills. Cell, insurance, gas, whatever. ~ I've reminded him over and over what the rules will be. Over the past year or so, he has come to mental terms with the abstract. Over the past 6 months, he has been trying to find a job, with no luck. SO, what does that mean for his future.... IF, after he graduates, he can't find a job, he is required to volunteer at the animal shelter for his employment. Let me also note that there is a huge change for my son. He was dx'ed with multiple sclerosis last year. So, he cannot do any job outside about 9 months of the year (we live in the Phoenix area). (Heat will cause a pseudo-relapse of MS.) My expectations have had to change, however, I haven't told my son that. I've told my son that it is even more important that he choose wisely. He has to go to college. He has to have health insurance. HTH, Kris

Honestly, your friend needs step up and be proactive and stop being reactive to this situation. (because that's what it sounds like from your post) He should be insisting that ALL of the children need to get into counseling. He only has the right to get his two, but IF wife wants him back in the marriage, she needs to agree to counseling for her kid too. (Personally, if I were step mom, I would be taking my kid to her own therapist. First, to determine IF anything has happened to the 7yo boy. Children that young who are NOT hypersexualized play "doctor" and "show me yours, I'll show you mine" because they are curious. Hyper sexualized children emulate what they've seen/done. Second, to determine IF something happened between the step siblings. Again, there are innocent things that can and do happen between two, non-related children. If they sweep this under the rug, they ruin many different relationships. Kris

Well that annoys me. And, please don't think that was me criticizing you. Kris

Okay, 1: your husband needs a (figurative) smack upside the head. (That is also abuse!) 2: Call!! This isn't worth your job and/or future in that career. 3: forced wakefulness is torture. I don't care what the US government says about it re: prisoners, but I believe that it is torture. To do it to your child is abuse. Kris

I'm a mandatory reporter and I believe that means you have to report ANYTHING even if it isn't in the course of your employment/licensing arrangement. I do not like spanking, but true palm-on-bum spanking is not physical abuse. (psychological yes) I believe that the hot sauce/ hot peppers is abuse. I believe forced wakefulness is abuse. (was that 3am or 3 pm?!?!?) I do not like the lack of heat, but that isn't abuse. Kris

That isn't true. My mom is on medication for RA and she can't fast more than 6 hours, max. I am not diabetic or pre-diabetic (they keep watching my labs), and the longest I can fast is overnight from 8pm to 5am. At that, I'm starting to get sick and needing to eat when I get up. There are many reasons people can't fast for more than 6 hours and they are natural. Typically, I eat a small meal 6 times a day. Kris

{{{hugs}}} We have a cat that had the exact same injury. We decided to have the surgery. That was 4 years ago. I can't say I regret the surgery, because my son is happy with his cat. (Personally, I can't stand the cat; he's a pain-in-the-bum animal.) BUT, he hurts. Low level pain that occasionally flares up. He is lazy as heck and while he isn't overweight, he isn't healthy. I wouldn't do the surgery again. Kris

Oddly enough, I've received mixed answers. JAG doesn't know. I've contacted DEERS office, but since I'm not the member, they won't talk to me. Go figure!! The Personnel office at the local AFB was a bit more help, but again, one says yes and the other says no. We are waiting to see what happens. I pray that the idea of his parents getting PO'ed at him is enough to prevent it. Kris

The problem is that his father can remove him from DEERS at any time after graduation. This isn't that the military/Tricare will remove him, this is that his father has been a jerk. The insurance is fantastic; the parent providing it is not. Kris

But this isn't solely about someone going without. This is about the next step as well. This is about how we live our lives. Anyone who lives their life with no health insurance is taking a huge risk, but so are the people who rely on their current health insurance plan, that includes cost share programs like Sam. What happens if/when the Impossible or Improbable happens? What happens if you run out of money? What happens if you are unable to make your insurance payments? The Impossible happened to my family. Last year, my 17yo son was dx'ed with a very rare form of MS. The CDC lists it at 3 in 1,000,000 and only 10% of those individuals are dx'ed under the age of 20. His current health insurance is through his father, who is AD Navy. However, his dad can drop him at any time. I cannot provide him with health insurance right now, as I'm a full-time student. He must have insurance. His medications and vitamins cost OOP $65 per month, plus his DMT MS drug is $2100 per month pre-insurance. That is just maintenance. Any relapse and we are talking at minimum several thousand for in-home steroid therapy. Add in additional costs: PT, MRI's of brain and spine (he has 4 lesions on his spine), and what not. What happens in the future? Kris

There is a huge difference between the VHA, Medicaid, Medicare, Tricare/Champus, SCHIP (federal state children's programs), and the IHS (Indian Health Services) systems. Huge! The VHA has been having loads of problems, for multiple reasons/excuses. However, you do not see those same problems happening in any of the other areas. Are there problems? Yes! Absolutely. I have a heck of a time with UHC, who currently services Tricare West region and am filed a formal complaint today for a change in management and failure to notify their members. I know many people in IHS who have complaints. And so on... However, when we get to the nitty gritty of the problems: VHA has issues that none of the other groups do. One out of six federally funded and run health care programs have serious problems. How is that the government doing a subpar job? Kris

I agree. I've been trying to figure out my DS18's future medical healthcare coverage. I've contacted dozens of different companies and agencies, including Samaritan. Samaritan was almost insulting. It is healthy Christians covering other healthy Christians who might run into a health crisis. Kris

This! I knew, because I looked into what it would cost to remove a 50' pine, that tree removal might bankrupt us. So, if there was an incident that would cause damage to the tree, thus making the tree a hazard to our or a neighbor house, I wanted the insurance to pay to take it down. Several years prior (to the purchase of that house), we had a neighbor (we rented, they owned) who had very bad damage to a tree during a hurricane. It damaged our detached garage (no damage to our belongings, just the building). When their homeowners insurance came out, they would not pay to have the tree removed, just have the fence fixed. Our neighbors had to come up with almost $1000 to have the tree taken out. They couldn't leave it, because if it fell it would have taken out our garage entirely. The homeowner's insurance company sent them a letter notifying them IF the tree fell and damaged the garage past 30-60 days (there was a lot of tree damage in the area after the hurricane) after the date of the letter, they would sue for negligence for the cost of the garage and legal fees. It wasn't worth the risk. Kris

That was a bit rude.

I'm not saying that (mental health trumps...), but I am saying that the way the laws are written, service animals (NOT ESA) trump life threatening allergy (you put disability...I'm not sure how that is, but I also have a migraine so my brain is a little pile of mush). And, I actually support those laws. A DAD (Diabetes Alert Dog) or a Guide Dog or a _______, all well-trained and service dogs, should have the ability to go to the movies, a restaurant, an airplane, and wherever. There are ways to accommodate severe allergies. Kris

I believe this comes down to their policy. When we purchased our house in SC, I was very specific with our insurance company (USAA) in that I wanted a rider attached to our policy for damaged trees. If we wanted the tree out _before_ it was damaged, our pocket. If a tree was damaged in any type of storm/accident/??, the rider covered it. But, we paid for that. Kris