I wanted to address this directly, specifically after you quoted (a few days ago) one of my posts. When I consider "fraudsters", I'm not looking at the HUMAN. I'm actually looking at the dog. I _know_ there is a real need for ESA dogs for humans. I've even met a few pairs (human/dog) over the past several years. When I look at frauds, I'm looking at dogs that are NOT trained. Dogs that are not appropriately socialized, who potty at inappropriate times (and I'm not referring to accidents), and other types of frauds. Service dogs must be held to a higher standard than a pet. They are afforded the status to be in places that pets do not belong. Kris

Can't shop at midnight if you are the only adult at home.

Depends, is that request at a normal volume or is it yelling? Kris

And this is why we have the ADA laws. "Allergies and fear of dogs are not valid reasons for denying access or refusing service to people using service animals. When a person who is allergic to dog dander and a person who uses a service animal must spend time in the same room or facility, for example, in a school classroom or at a homeless shelter, they both should be accommodated by assigning them, if possible, to different locations within the room or different rooms in the facility." https://www.ada.gov/service_animals_2010.htm A person needing a service animal isn't creating a problem. Kris

Nope, they put the dude at the front of the plane and the three service dogs to the rear, where we were. Kris

First, your iPad capitalizes the first word after "said" because most often it is "...said George." a noun, frequently a proper noun. Second, I think this whole topic comes down to three issues: entitlement, personal control, and lack of compassion. Your dad feels entitled to understand why this child was screaming. The lady on the airplane felt entitled to have a quiet flight. I am one of those people who _want_ to know why...I love getting people's stories. However, I have no expectation to have my curiosity indulged. Personal control: that child in the supermarket (we're guessing) does not have the ability to control herself. Gramma has to do her food shopping. We no longer lock up the disabled into locked institutions, consequently, they will occasionally disrupt our lives. However, that woman on the plan, your father, you, me, my kids, the other men at the store are ALL capable of controlling themselves. I'm guessing your dad held his judgement to himself in the store (you didn't mention him as yelling at the kid). He held himself under control and left it to judging the grandmother and the ill-mannered child. As for lack of empathy... I'm just going to leave that at that. Kris

I agree! Even when/if you reach a point of saying, I'll simply agree to disagree, you (the royal 'you') are expanding your mind to hear a different POV. Kris

That doesn't change the responsibility of the individual. There is no excuse to verbally abuse a child or the parents of a child because their child is upset and throwing a fit. Kris

LOL! I agree with you right up to service animals--and I am NOT referring to the pseudo-service animals that are all over the place right now. I mean genuine disability dogs. I was on a flight with my kids (they were little) and there were 3 service dogs on the flight. Two were guide dogs for the blind and the other was a mobility dog (I think the lady had CP). One dude threw a fit at the gate counter. For various reasons, including he was allergic, he couldn't be on a flight with a dog and he demanded that they be put on a different flight. It didn't happen and the dude gripped and complained the entire 4-hour flight. Kris

My 15yo daughter has Fibromyalgia, Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome (EDS), an autonomic dysfunction disorder that is yet to be specified, is hypersensitive to noises (much like misophonia), and other issues. She has learned that SHE is responsible for her responses to external stimuli. She would have had her own melt down at long-term screaming of a child, however, it is my job to teach her how to cope. Ear plugs, head phones with music or MP3 recordings of static/ocean waves/rain storms, extra pillows, and other physical barriers are all valid options. Yelling at a little girl who is not in control of herself, a stranger, is NOT a valid option. I can have empathy for many different excuses as to why this woman felt she was put out by this child's fit, but there is no excuse to yell at a child. Kris

THAT system is think is fabulous! I do NOT think healthcare should be free at the point of service. A copay keeps people realistic. "Do I think my child is sick enough to warrant a $5/$10/$20 copay?" I spent my children's childhoods at military clinics. From the big ones to the tiny ones reserved for on base residents only. One thing repeated, over and over: some mothers would bring their children into clinic for the stupidest things! Every cold or sniffle. Every slightly infected scratch (that needed to be cleaned and a bandaid put on it) or whatever. All of them came into clinic to be checked out. That would have come to a stop with a simple copay. Kris

Yes, and I think you will see a lot more of that with a single-payer system. The only way we are ever going to see NO interference between the doctor and patient is in a cash-for-services system. THAT only benefits the people who can, and will, pay for it. It does NOT benefit the poor. Kris

Well....yes and no. Many to most of the medical staff on base are active duty or retired medical personnel, but not all. They have gone to a system where much of the staff is civilian personnel. My daughter's current PCM is a civilian NP. My son's PCM is also an NP, but she's also a Major in the Air Force. I've told her she isn't allowed to PCS and she just laughs at me. My last PCM, before my divorce, was a retired Navy Captain. They have gone to a model that reduces the number of military personnel not deployed, on OCONUS orders, or at a sea command. BUT, your point still is correct. Even if we are talking about civilians, they are "ruled" by the military healthcare system. It has some hairy moments, specifically when dealing with the entity covering the Tricare for that region. UHC is a pain in my BUM! But, generally speaking, it is the military covering their patients, with a civilian or an AD medical person. As for the VA, they are a whole 'nother ball of molding wax. I've seen a few AD members in our local VHA facility (both clinic and hospital), but I kind of get the impression they are on their way out for their own reasons. Kris

(note: I'm reading this as though the patient is Canadian....if I'm wrong, I apologize.) Um, how about being in the US and finding out that you can't afford to pay for your treatment. Yes, now that patient would qualify for Medicaid (by whichever name it is called in that state), but that doesn't suddenly mean the doctor will see you. Or that the treatment is free. Or that you'll ever get the treatment. I know a lady right now who is trying to fund her chemo treatment. Kris

I agree, your plan in the US was better than what you are receiving in Canada...but you are missing one point: You only had Health Insurance in the US while you (your Dh) was employed. If he lost is job, died, was seriously injured, you are out of insurance (unless you can afford Cobra). Yes, if you compare Plan A to Plan B, you have the ability to say: this is good and this isn't as good. But, what about stability? My son is 18 and he graduates from HS in Dec. At that point, my XH is able to remove him from his health insurance. This insurance costs him nothing; the dental costs $30 per month for ALL dependents (1 or 25, it's still $30) and he's married, so he pays the dental anyway. What are my 18yo child's options? (I'm now sharing stuff I don't normally share...) Because of MS, my son can't drive a car. We live in Phoenix until I graduate and MS is greatly affected by heat. Yesterday was 110. He can't drive. He can't take the bus, the nearest one is 1.5 mile from the house. How does he get a job? I have to drive him. Plus, he can't work outside 8-9 months of the year. No job that he can get, and he's been trying for 6 months now, is going to give him health insurance. So, his only option, if his dad drops him is Access (Medicaid). Access might cover his $2100 per month drug......or it might not. My 15yo daughter is planning on getting her degrees, first a BS in Psychology then some sort of PhD in a more narrow field, and then she plans on emigrating to Australia, or UK, or Sweden, or the Netherlands, or ____________. Most of the places she is looking at she doesn't even need to learn the language prior to going (though she is planning on it) because they'll allow immigration with English and the degree and teach her the language when she gets there. Why? Because she doesn't want her children to face the same problems her brother is facing. Kris

Just as a side note, this is why I like the ICE system. I was always giving the good alongside the bad. kris

Well, I agree with you there! Indian Health Services sucks!! When I did my single-payer review, I looked at what we have here in the US. Tricare has problems, but overall is a good system...when we aren't fighting with the contractor agency to cover something that should be covered (I know Tricare VERY well). However, the IHS is horrid! I did a series of interviews with a few people here in Phoenix and O.M.Goodness!!!!! The horror stories I heard. Personally, I think IHS was formed out of guilt and funded out of guilt and eventually, people got tired of feeling guilty. Just my opinion and I don't have anything more than stories and other people's opinions to go off of---IHS wasn't a big focus for my review. Kris

:hurray: :thumbup1: I'm shocked each and every single time I end up in the ED with one of my kids (more times in the past year than in the previous 17 years). The last time, there was a mom in the next cubicle with her 10yo daughter. They were there because mom couldn't afford to get her T1 diabetic daughter the rest of her supplies and there were 10 days left in the month. Access (the state Medicaid option) didn't authorize enough supplies. The time before that, while waiting for the MRI machine to open, I had a conversation with the mom of a child (who was in the MRI) with Epilepsy. She had health insurance through her work, but it wouldn't cover the dosage of pills for her son because he was overweight and only 8yo. The drug cost was outrageous in the US and she usually purchased his from Canada, but her sister, who lived in Seattle, died and she can't go get it herself. Healthcare should not be only for those who can afford to pay the exorbitant costs that the US has inflated to having. The costs affect everyone, but the upper-middle class finds ways around it through good health insurance to budgets with a higher amount of money left over after the bare bones are paid for and the wealthy even more so. And, before anyone thinks I'm whinging out of turn, I divorced and went back to school and am holding a 3.85 GPA (even after Fall 2015's term of hell--kid in hospital doesn't equate to great times) to be able to do something for myself. But, I have a true fear that my 18yo Senior in High School will not be able to manage college. The brain damage he has from the MS is awful. I believe in hard work, but what about him and people like him, unable to make a better life. Are we going back to the days where the wealthy thrive and those with bad luck don't. Kris

Which is worse: the government dictating what the patient can/not do, or the insurance company? One of the MS drugs that the Neuro wanted to put my son on has a high chance of PML caused by a virus. There is one lab in the country that tests for the virus. My son has Tricare, active duty dependent and we had to justify why we used this lab. Turned out we needed a prior authorization and didn't have one. An easy fix after the fact, Neuro ripped them a new one and that solved that. (FTR: I _hate_ with a passion UHC and miss TriWest....for anyone who actually understands that sentence.) Either way we look at it...._someone_ is going to be in our business. It can be the cooperation who is trying to make money or it can be the government entity who is running the program. The Business makes money when the patient makes the payment of premiums. Thus, has no investment in keeping/making the person a productive member of society. The Government makes money when the patient has a job and pays taxes. Thus, the investment of the patient's health is a priority. Kris

I agree that something needs to change for Med School, however, I've known some fantastic doctors who would have made Bad Bad Bad nurses!!! Kris

But I think you are comparing apples to oranges, specifically the VA system. The VA system has HUGE problems, but the US Government doesn't run it, the US Department of Veterans Affairs. Do I want the Dept of VA to run our single-payer healthcare system? Oh heck no!!! There are serious problems happening there; many of which we aren't hearing the actually problem, just the symptoms. Take a look at the military hospitals and clinics, which are run by the Military Health System and directed by the local CO. Are there problems within those systems: YES! You couldn't have paid me to give birth to my daughter at Portsmouth Naval Hospital and when we lived in HI, the military locals referred to Trippler as "Crippler". But, you are going to find problems anywhere and everywhere. Problems are systematic and dependent on who is running that hospital system. Individual hospitals are a potential for huge problems. I have a friend with a child (13) with MS in London. GOSH is fantastic, but sometimes they can't get into be seen at GOSH---like when they are visiting her parents in Wales. The alternatives can be horrific. We are going to see individual hospitals with problems anywhere at anytime. However, my friend with a 13yo child with MS never has to worry if her child is going to be treated. Or, if treatment is going to bankrupt her family or her child's future. Of, if that child is going to have to go without treatment. My child has no such guarantee. Going backwards up your post....Canadians with money can come to the US for treatment. Because they have money. People in the US, with money, receive better healthcare. Patients here in the US wait, sometimes months, for everything from appointments to procedures to diagnostic tests. My son waited a week for a spinal tap. Why? Because it wasn't an emergency (no fever), it had to be approved by the insurance first. He has good health insurance. What about middle-class to poor people who do not have good health insurance? I know of a 19yo girl with MS and another auto-immune disease. One of the only drugs that will help both diseases and not hurt either costs about $145,000 per year, plus monthly labs. It took 4 months to receive a denial. They refused to cover the cost. Her options are limited: take nothing or take two different drug that might hurt the other disease. We see rationing here in the US...only it is money rationing. If we leave a single-payer healthcare system to be done at the state level, we will end up with a huge mess. This has to be a federal system. Kris

I agree with this! My cousin (a few times removed here and there....but we have the same family name...or did before we married :closedeyes: ) lives in Sweden. We regularly compare healthcare differences. It took her longer to get into see a rheumatologist and be dx'ed with Lupus (6 months after I did), BUT, she pays pennies for her drugs, that cost me 5-6x's, and can see him within a few weeks or see his PN within a few days if she is having a flare, while it takes me weeks to months to get into see the PN, forget the Rheumy herself. Her mother was dx'ed with MS from an inpatient stay, just as my 17yo son was last year. It took days to get the MRI's, non-emergency CT's, the spinal tap, blah blah blah approved for my son. For her mom, it took a matter of waiting until the machine opened up, which for the MRI meant waiting for the emergency cases to be finished first. Past the diagnosis stage, it took us more than 6 months to get a maintenance medication approved. That is 6 months where the MS ran rampant. During that time, 7 new lesions formed and 3 formally active lesions scarred. My cousin's mom had to wait 2 weeks for a blood test to come back, which came back opposite what they wanted, and then another week to start the second choice drug. Final point: my cousin's mom is on the SAME drug and the SAME dosage as my son. My son's drug costs $6400 for 3 packages of 28 days, with a copay of $20 for 3 months. In Sweden, this drug is (about) $3100 SEK to USD; her copay is (again, about) $100 per month. A higher copay, but since it is a new drug in Sweden, if they find that it works, they will make it a permanent drug and the cost should go down. However, why do we in the US have to deal with these horrid drug costs? I'll pay higher taxes to have no worries about IF my child will have medical care. Kris

Snicker....I shouldn't laugh, but my chandler-swinging child is now 18...so I can. I'm a #2 parent, followed closely by a #1 parent....but I would still think it is a private matter. However, I think this qualifies under a safety issue. How about the kid who does't want to leave the _____ exhibit when the rest of the group is moving onto the next room? Kris

When my kids were little, the only "loud" parenting I did was in safety issues. "RED LIGHT" would immediately have the kid stop, look around him/her to see if they were safe, and then look to me. Otherwise, I parented very very quietly. My toddlers and preschoolers would look to my face when I would snap my fingers and stop what they were doing......or they would go back to what they were doing and ignore me (I'm realistic). Then, I'd parent again, usually with a whisper in the ear. By the time they were middles (8+), they knew what was expected of them. If they misbehaved, I might call them aside or I might just wait to say something when we left. Now, as teenagers, I rarely parent at all. Last Oct, Ky (then 17, now 18) was in the hospital for several weeks. At one point he was going to say something that would have majorly offended his sister. All I had to say was, "NO!" and point my finger at him. He snickered and shut his mouth. :glare: A second time, he had a practical joke set up to "hit" the next adult through the door....he and the nurses had a quiet war going on....UNFORTUNATELY, the next adult coming through the door was the female neurologist (who was/is a bad-word-that-means-female-dog). In the split second before it would have been "set off", I pointed my finger at him and spat out, "Don't you DARE!". Everyone looked at me, except for the nurse and my son. Both of them snickered quietly and resumed their "aren't I cute and innocent faces". The Neuro's NP's figured out what was going on, but neither the Neuro or my ex-notDearH or his wife had a clue what was happening. Simply put: just 'cause you can't see it doesn't mean it doesn't happen. I very firmly believe that parenting should be between the offending child and the parent; it shouldn't include an audience. Kris

Ouch!! 11 years ago, in July, ....gosh, I can't believe it's been that long.... we had a house fire that took everything. The kids and I just happened to be out of the house at tae kwan do lessons and the cat was out at the Vet's. It was awful. A candle ignited our fire. I had blown it out, but since we were leaving the next day (why the cat was at the vet), I had the whole house locked up tight. The fire marshal thought my slamming the door was just enough of a breeze to relight the candle and a chain of events melted the living room. The fire didn't consume much, the house was locked up tight with the exception of the fire place (that we never used) in the same room as the candle. The neighbors started pounding on our door because smoke pouring out of the chimney in July was NOT normal. When the fire department finally arrived and busted down the door, it was seconds away from heat-exploding the windows and creating a backdraft. We were the 5th unit of townhouses in a row of 6 and the fire marshal determined that the attics didn't have fire-proof walls separating each unit. The whole building would have gone up. In the end, we lost everything. The TV and a number of other plastic things melted, so they recommended that we not keep any of the clothes or personal items. For a long time, the act of living was just moving from one day to the next. Filling out forms and purchasing new stuff. My kids were 4 and 7 at the time. Homeschooling was a nightmare and I almost enrolled them into school. Thankfully, it was a few months away from starting (about 6 weeks) and that was long enough to pick up the pieces. I was never one to need stuff, but the pictures were hard for me to lose. There were a few odds and ends in boxes in the detached garage, some of which should never have been there. {{{hugs}}} Kris