:iagree: Brilliant and wise advice. I need to copy and paste that. Very good advice. Copying and pasting this also. I just finished reading everyone's posts. Great advice from all. Thinking of you and hoping that they can leave you alone soon and move on. It's so hard, I know. :grouphug:

Caroline, I have not yet had time to read any of the responses. Sorry you've been going through this. You're definitely not the only one. :grouphug: I'm very much not a confrontational type of person, having been raised in Britain, and considering myself quite British ... confrontations scare me. What has worked for me, and is obviously not a possibility for you or most, is living far, far away. Boundaries are important. They're obviously not the type to just pop in or call all the time, I assume? So that in itself is good. I would most certainly draw the line if they try to drive the kids between you and them. I would try to meet with them only on your turf, your territory. If they write or say things or the attacks get personal, you do need to stand up for yourself. That, I have no problem doing. I've also changed since entering my 40s. You are not a child anymore and do not need to be treated like one. Sorry to say this, but your dh may need to always be there when mil is around. Always. He may need to act like a buffer. She should have zero access and opportunity to attack you. Your time alone with either of them should be very minimal, if at all. I do have a list of come-backs/responses for when people are rude or mean. Most of it concerns homeschooling. But I think it can be applied to all situations. Yoga, deep breathing, and some supplements help deal with the stress of such awful rubbish. I'm so sorry that you have to go through all this :grouphug:. I'm sure others have far better advice. Not answering the phone helps. Not responding to any correspondence helps also. Oftentimes, the best way to deal with meanness is to simply ignore them. Drives them nuts. They're looking to get you riled up and upset.

Dh and I were both saying the same exact thing. I just get frustrated with Oscars. Whenever I think someone deserves to win, they seldom do ...

We're watching it right now as I type this. Just taking a few minutes' break. Love it. Superb. :D

:iagree: And anything Cadbury's, Belgian, Toblerone, Lindt, etc. Has to be European. The Europeans make THE best chocolate.

:iagree: :iagree: :iagree: Milk and cow's milk products (other than very good plain yogurts with probiotics and no sugar) are most probably the #1 acne culprit. During my horrible acne years, little did I know, I used to drink milk like it was going out of style. It was mainly when I drank much, much less milk that my skin cleared up. You mentioned your kids being dairy fanatics. Remember that which we crave the most, tends to be what our bodies are most sensitive to. The fabulous book "The Anti-Cancer Book" cites studies on this. Showing how teens in Australia, etc. - cleared their skin up amazingly by cutting out milk. I would try as much as possible with the milk thing, whatever you can from below, and see a dermatologist, or a more integrative-minded one, if possible. Acne is mainly caused by an inflammation of the epidermis - it's an inflammatory condition and the inflammation needs to be dealt with. Less refined sugars. Candy, soda, pastries, and cookies can be particularly troublesome for those prone to acne. I know that this is the case w/my dc. Less Milk. Milk is probably the #1 acne culprit . Even organic milk is a problem. Switch to calcium-fortified soy milk and other sources of calcium – spinach, collard greens, tofu, plain yogurt,; or try almond or rice milk. More Fish, especially oily fish, such salmon - Carlson's Fish Oil (liquid or capsules) are a fabulous source of Omega 3s - essential for healthy skin . Fish Oil is a good source of Essential Fatty Acids. These are are anti-inflammatory and help keep oil production under control. They have Carlson's Fish Oil capsules for teens. My dc take them. Cucumber Juice - I made some for my dc yesterday. If you have a juicer, trust me on this. Fresh cucumber juice (can even add in an apple) works like a charm. More Green Veggies More Purple and Deep Red Foods – acai, pomegranates, purple carrots, black grapes, and beets Probiotics are essential “The Clear Skin Diet” by Valori Treloar (is a book that I have not read, but have heard great things about) Walmart (and Amazon) has some homeopathic supplements in the Skin Care section – Nature’s Cure – one for boys and one for girls. If one doesn’t work, switch the gender around. Works pretty well on my dc. Worth a try. LYMPHATIC SYSTEM Do you have a mini-trampoline/rebounder? Regular trampolining/rebounding helps clear your lymphatic system. Many skin conditions are common symptoms of a congested lymphatic system. Things that help to clear up the lymphatic system, not all are practical for a pre-teen - just info for you to know: • Daily Rebounding - I try to get my dc to bounce on the rebounder as often as possible. • Deep Breathing • Dry Body Brushing • Massage and/or Reflexology • Swinging - as in sitting on a swing and having fun PRODUCTS: PROACTIV Winner by GHRI (Good Housekeeping Research Institute) was Proactiv - but for your ds, I think, this might be too harsh. NETUROGENA ADVANCED SOLUTIONS COMPLETE ACNE THERAPY SYSTEM Runner Up by GHRI (Good Housekeeping Research Institute) Avoid thick, waxy hairstyling products, especially if your hair usually touches your forehead. http://www.skincarephysicians.com/acnenet/index.html http://www.acne.org/

This is the info I found. Doctors aren’t always savvy about drug, food, and nutrition interactions. Pharmacists frequently have access to an up-to-the-minute database that tells them which substances combine well together and which can cause problems. You need to know whether or not the nutrients you’re taking could cause complications, or could thin your blood too much, particularly if you’re scheduled for surgery. It’s vital to talk with several people in your health-care team – your pharmacist, physician, and any practitioners of complementary medicine, to look carefully at the actions and interactions of everything you’re taking. You or they can also consult the new “Physicians’ Desk Reference for Nutritional Supplements”, an excellent up-to-date reference on the actions and adverse reactions of hundreds of nutrients. http://www.pdrhealth.com/drugs/altmed/altmed-a-z.aspx -- Here are some common drug interactions—as well as potential benefits—when taken with herbs and other supplements or even certain foods: Anticonvulsant drugs (like Carbatrol, Depakote, Dilantin, Mysoline, Tegretol) may react negatively with ginkgo, glutamine, grapefruit juice, nicotinamide (a compound produced when the body breaks down vitamin B3, or niacin), sedative herbs (kava, hops, passionflower, valerian), St. John’s wort, vitamin A, and white willow (an herbal analgesic). But carnitine and vitamin D may be useful for people taking these drugs. Benzodiazepines (anti-anxiety and sedative drugs like Ativan, Halcion, Klonopin, Librium, Serax, Valium, Xanax) can interact with grapefruit juice and sedative herbs (kava, hops, passionflower, valerian), while melatonin (a natural hormone that regulates sleep) may be beneficial. Corticosteroids (anti-inflammatory and immunosuppressive meds like Articocort, Celestone, Decadron, Hydrocortone, Nasacort) are not recommended with the herb licorice (if taken internally), but calcium, magnesium, and vitamin D supplementation can help prevent bone loss due to these drugs. And topical use of aloe and licorice appears to enhance the effects of hydrocortisone cream. Heparin (a very strong blood thinner) is not recommended with garlic, ginkgo, phosphatidylserine, policosanol, vitamin C, or white willow, but because this drug can interfere with vitamin D in the body, you may need to supplement this “sunshine” vitamin. NSAIDs (pain-relieving anti-inflammatories including aspirin, Bufferin, Cope, ibuprofen (like Midol, Motrin), naproxen, and Cox-2 inhibitors may react negatively with arginine (an amino acid found in dairy, fish, poultry, and meats), feverfew, garlic, ginkgo, policosanol, potassium citrate, St. John’s wort, vitamin E, and white willow. But cayenne, folate, licorice, and vitamin C supplementation may be useful. Statins (popular drugs like Lipitor, Mevacor, Pravachol, Zocor for lowering cholesterol) are not recommended to use with grapefruit juice, niacin, or red yeast rice (an herbal cholesterol-lowering therapy), but anyone taking statins also needs CoQ10 for energy production and normal heart function. Tamoxifen (an anti-estrogen drug used in treating breast cancer) may have its beneficial effects enhanced by the omega-6 fatty acid GLA. Thyroid hormones (like Armour Thyroid, Choloxin, Euthroid, Synthroid) should not be taken at the same time as calcium or iron supplements, and soy may interfere with the absorption of these meds. Warfarin (a somewhat dangerous anticoagulent drug) is not recommended for use with alfalfa supplements, Asian ginseng, devil’s claw, digestive enzymes (bromelain and papain), dong quai, feverfew, garlic, ginger, ginkgo, green tea, policosanol, St. John’s wort, vinpocetine, vitamins A, C, E, K, or white willow. Obviously, you need to tell your healthcare provider about any supplements you take regularly—and don’t be afraid to explain why. Even more important, ask about any potential adverse effects and interactions for all medicines he or she prescribes. It’s never a bad idea to ask your friendly, local pharmacist about interactions, either. Often these professionals are very knowledgeable on the ill effects of drugs.

Peela and others, hope everyone finds relief soon. :grouphug: Been thinking of you all. If you have access to a good acupuncturist, I have read that it relieves arthritis pain in 90% of people. Worth a try. Takes about 6 sessions, or maybe (hopefully less). I LOVE acupuncture. Haven't needed it yet myself. But do want to give it a try. I love what I've seen it do to friends and family.

I have lots of tips, but don't want to overwhelm here, since it might defeat the whole purpose of this thread. I'm never calm and collected enough, but I try ... it's very, very hard. I haven't yet tried these, but I really do want to. Heard fabulous stuff about them. Amazon has them. Have seen them in health stores also. The Bach Flower Remedies represent a form of psychotherapy in a bottle, a noninvasive modality to address negative emotional states like: • Anxiety • Depression • Impatience A Welsh homeopath, Dr. Edward Bach recognized in the 1920s that, if herbs have healing powers, so must flowers. Over many years, he experimented with numerous flowers and trees to create a total of 38 plant-based Bach Flower Remedies. Bach Rescue Remedy is used in many emergency rooms to help alleviate trauma. Centuary is useful for boundary issues, especially for people who give too much of themselves Impatiens is good for irritability and short tempers. Oak is for those determined types who struggle on (despite setbacks) through adversity or illness. Rock water can ease tension for those who tend to be hard on themselves.

:iagree: Never heard of Thieves Oil, however. Thank you for this thread and for letting us know. Will look into it. We hate to get sick, particularly during traveling and from long flights.

All that has been already said. Much of this is a repeat. Sorry. No time to edit. At Risk Contact Lens Wearers Women during and after menopause People over 60 Certain medications – antihistamines, antidepressants, some blood pressure medications, and birth-control pills. Untreated Dry Eye Syndrome can lead to: Scarring Impaired Vision EAT MORE Drink LOTS of water. If you already drink plenty of water, drink more! Foods rich in Omega-3 Walnuts Fatty fish (salmon and cod) Omega-3s help the body to produce more tear layer around the eye, which creates more lubricated eyes EAT LESS Limit caffeine Eliminate artificial sweeteners SUPPLEMENTS A good Fish Oil – such as Carlson’s Omega-3s help the body to produce more tear layer around the eye, which creates more lubricated eyes Dandelion Root Tea OTHER TIPS Blink often Use humidifier in home if air is dry. Change the water and clean and disinfect tank frequently. Avoid rubbing eyes Eye drops labeled “artificial tears”. Don’t get those that are meant to relieve redness or itchy eyes. Try homeopathic Optique 1 by Boiron http://www.theratears.com/nutrition.htm

Thank you all. Off to share these with dh later. :)

Very similar to mine. No scrapbooking. No crafts. Also put photos in album in order. Just like her. Very little baking these days. Very little cooking also (thanks to my mom). Barely any major housework, thanks to where we live. Help here is much less costly than in the U.S. Cannot stand using the dishwasher. I'd rather wash the dishes myself, thank you very much. I don't dye my hair, wear make up (other than tinted lip balm) - and I used to wear a TON of it. Like Auntie M, I also seldom have my nails done. They're always short. I'm low-maintenance. These days, my exercise is moderate. Used to be too extreme and get fewer results. No longer do every thing for my dc. They need to learn to stand on their own two feet more. Don't do much in the way of outside activities. Very, very selective. Less chauffering! :D I seldom entertain. And if I do, I no longer wish to go all-out. I do laundry daily. I also never iron. All our clothes are pretty much no-iron. I do nap pretty much daily and for a long time, may I add. :) I need to work on clutter. I love reading aloud to my dc. I need to say "no" more often. Thanks for the reminder, Auntie M. I'm currently struggling with a "no" that needs to be said. :confused:

Can't see it in our country. I lived in Ptld for 4 1/2 years - my undergrad years. Loved it. Loved the crunchiness. Did not like the rain, however. I'm just not a cold-weather, rain, sort-of-person. Love visiting there, however.

You look GREAT!!! :hurray: :hurray: :hurray:

I just started The Forgotten Garden.

I'm still waiting to hear from them. I'm beginning to think the whole thing is a scam. :confused:

Yes, and I take a book or some reading material with me wherever I go.

Yes, Rosie. I've read that time and time again. I just googled "Do melatonin levels decline with age" and lots of stuff came up. This is just one of them. http://altmedicine.about.com/od/melatonin/a/melatonin.htm

:iagree: :iagree: :iagree: :iagree: I would just love to come up (and am working on one or, should I say, hoping to work on ;)) a few different plans to shake up my diet once I finish with hcg. Although quite honestly, hcg phase 4 is meant to be for life. I'll see how it goes. Right now, hcg works me and I am loving it. I would love to see if anyone else has fun plans for shaking up some weight loss. Like Peela, I love playing around with this sort of stuff. :D

Agreeing with all the great replies so far. Some tips: Magnesium Helps occasional headaches that can come with caffeine withdrawal Magnesium helps eliminate peripheral nerve disturbances that can lead to migraines There’s a strong correlation between migraines and hormonal fluctuations. Estrogen hormones (right before, during, or immediately after your period) can block the body’s absorption of magnesium, leading to low blood levels of this mineral. A number of scientific studies found low levels of magnesium in people with migraines. Many women with monthly migraines have low blood levels of magnesium. Remember that the more calcium you take, the more magnesium you need. Try cutting back on calcium while you increase your magnesium and see how this change affects your migraines. Take equal amounts of calcium and magnesium. For most people on a healthy diet, 500 mg of each supplement should be enough. If you have symptoms of magnesium deficiency (see above) – if you’re feeling edgy, have muscle cramps, suffer insomnia, crave chocolate, or notice increased urination, adjust your calcium-magnesium ratio, so that you’re taking at least as much magnesium or—ideally—twice as much magnesium as calcium. 400-1200 mg daily of Magnesium is helpful but use according to bowel tolerance. Your body knows how much magnesium you can tolerate from bowel tolerance – take as much magnesium as your bowels can tolerate Calcium, magnesium, and many other minerals are best absorbed when they are bound to an acidic carrier such as citrate, aspartate, picolinate, or amino acid chelate. Minerals need an acidic base to break down and get used. The most absorbable forms are magnesium citrate, glycinate taurate, or aspartate, although magnesium bound to Kreb cycle chelates (malate, succinate, fumarate) are also good. Avoid magnesium carbonate, oxide, sulfate, and gluconate. They are poorly absorbed (and the cheapest and most common forms found in supplements). Side effects from too much magnesium include diarrhea, which can be avoided if you switch to magnesium glycinate. Most minerals are best taken as a team with other minerals in a multi-mineral formula. People with kidney disease or severe heart disease should take magnesium only under a doctor's supervision. Vitamin B2 - Riboflavin – 400 mg of this nerve-soothing vitamin daily could cut off your headaches in half within 3 months. Teas made with relaxing herbs like chamomile or valerian help Try supplementing with ginger. 520 mg daily to prevent headaches and 1040 mg to treat them Solgar Ginger Root capsules OTHER TIPS Headaches are a common symptom of a congested lymphatic system. Things that help to clear up the lymphatic system: • Daily Rebounding • Deep Breathing • Daily Dry Body Brushing • Massage and/or Reflexology • Swinging EPSOM SALTS BATH Taking a hot bath with Epsom salts (magnesium sulfate) is a good way to absorb and get much needed magnesium. Tiger Balm - love this stuff Dab a few drops of lavender essential oil on each temple and rub some around the hairline. Breathe deeply and relax. Repeat as needed. Take a nap Take middle finger and thumb of one hand, and grasp the webbing between thumb and forefinger on other hand, where you’ll probably feel a tender or sore point. Squeeze that point firmly for 40 seconds to one minute and then let go. Stretch regularly to prevent tension headaches EXERCISE – Begin with a daily 10-minute walk, take up a gentle yoga class, or try the slow movement of Tai Chi. Water aerobics and swimming help also. The more you exercise, the less likely you are to suffer from tension headaches. YOGA - Many yoga poses and the regular practice of yoga help relieve headaches. If you don’t have vision problems or difficulty speaking, and you get frequent headaches, you may be experiencing rebound headaches triggered by OTC pain-relieving drugs. When taken just 3 times weekly, aspirin, ibuprofen, and similar meds can actually blunt the brain’s natural pain-control mechanisms. This makes a person highly susceptible to repeat headaches. You should take no more than 1,000,000 mg of ibuprofen over the course of your life or you risk liver problems When headache sufferers overuse pain meds, there’s often a rebound effect. Researchers suspect that the drugs may turn off the production of natural painkillers or lower your pain threshold. Those containing caffeine, including Excedrin Migraine, are most likely to cause overuse headaches. Track just about how many days a month you take headache medicine. If it adds up to 15 or more days, chances are the drugs are at fault.

I would, IMHO, say (and as it applies to me): Diet - 80% Genetics - 5% Skin Care Regimen - 5% Lifestyle and Climate - 10% DIET Diet mostly. Once I really, really limited milk, my skin cleared up like you wouldn't believe. For me, my skin really shows when I eat healthy as opposed to when I eat junk. GENETICS Can help. Not always. My skin is not like my mom's. I don't know who I get my skin from. :lol: Maybe from my dad's side. SKIN CARE REGIMEN I love Paula's Choice and regular facials (if your budget allows). But they're not THE most important factors by any means, not in my experience. CLIMATE AND LIFESTYLE Limit sun ... I regret all my tano-rexic teenage years No smoking Humid climate here in the tropics is great

I have not yet used Retinol, but may as I get older. I know that it helps to fade age spots and you can use it on your hands, lower forearms, and even your decolletage. I have read that every woman over 40 should consider Retinol. I may wait until I’m 45 or 50. I’ll see. Retinol, retinol, retinol. That is the only medical proven cream that will stimulate collagen growth. Let me say it again, retinol. Everything else is smoke and mirrors. There isn't anything on the market that compares. Don't bother with Strivectin. It doesn't work and is ridiculously expensive. Retinol is the only real proven topical cream that reduces fine lines. Retinol is like taking a whip to an old horse; it goads your skin into making fresh new collagen. I have not read much good about the OTC retinols, and the studies that show real improvement all are based on prescription strength Retin As. Tretinoin is the generic of Retin A. Retin A can be drying because it comes in a base that is made for teenaged acne not old aging ladies. Renova is Retin A in a less drying base, but the active ingredient is exactly the same as Retin A. This from a very trusted friend who swears by the stuff. “Despite Madison Avenue and heavy marketing, no cream has ever been proven to reverse skin aging except retinol. Retinol is the magic bullet. I know that you need a prescription. I know it isn't cheap. But it works. We women pour billions of dollars into buying creams and potions that don't work, but then we balk at actually paying the money for something that does. Retinol works if your skin can tolerate it. Some people cannot tolerate it because it is too drying. You have to give is several weeks and the first 2-4 weeks you will look like h-e-double hockey sticks from the redness, peeling, and extreme dryness. Don’t get Retinol in your eyes! Make sure that you only apply about a pea-sized amount to the entire face. Wash face and dry and allow full 20-30 minutes before applying. Use no other products on face at night but use full-strength serums and moisturizers during the day. For the first two weeks, apply every third night. If your skin isn't irritated, ramp up to every other night for two weeks. Not dry or flaky? Go for it every night. This will greatly reduce retinoid effect. If you ease in, you can avoid a rough transition. I use 0.1% and you also can get 0.025%. Most people get irritation from improper use. Retinol should not be used if you are considering pregnancy or are pregnant. DO NOT FORGET TO USE SUNSCREEN if you use Retinol! First, your skin is rendered super-sensitive to the sun and second, those age spots will come roaring back. Don't use a retinoid if you are pregnant or breastfeeding. Don’t use a retinol for several days before a waxing treatment. Here are two sites that talk about retinol: http://www.retinolskincare.org/ http://www.mothernature.com/Library/Bookshelf/Books/10/26.cfm I am far from an expert. If you google retinol I think you'll get a good explanation. I started using tretinoin 1% a couple of years ago, but sporadically. I'd get through the redness, peeling, etc (the retinoid effect) and then I'd get lazy and stop. I've been very dedicated since November now and I really see results."

Dh teaches our dc chemistry and all the sciences (thankful for that ... ). He wants me to ask if you know of any chemistry kits that are practical, hands-on and at the high school level. Thanks.

You're right. It is. Very reluctant. I can't stand it when the only place to find reviews for something is on their own site. :confused: