When we moved to our new town two years ago one of the things that was a draw for me was learning that there is a Pokemon League at our local library hosted by junior college students. My boys love Pokemon but previously just collected cards and made up games to go with them. My oldest son is an Aspie and I have found that the league is one of the few things that I can generally get him to agree to participating in without much fight, and at times he really wants to go. Since he is a major homebody that is a big deal for us. We are fairly conservative but I don't have any problems with Pokemon. The boys have always had to save their allowances to buy cards or occasionally a booster pack is given as a reward or for stockings/Easter baskets. For us the only drawback is my son's obsession with watching YouTube videos about Pokemon strategies...but he also loves to watch videos with strategies on other games so I don't blame Pokemon. That is just an expression of being an Aspie. At our League the kids (boys and girls) play both cards and on their Nintendo Ds's. Pokemon draws a lot of kids on the spectrum and there are several boys from our social skills group who attend regularly. I would say it would depend completely on the social scene at the League.

I started teaching part-time at a small private school this year. Geometry was my least favorite high school math and, of course, I was asked to take that on and I've found the MUS version extremely gentle. We are at week 21 and still haven't touched a proof, only several theorems. However, we have talked a lot about how their knowledge of math continues to build on itself. I attended an engineering college >20 years ago and I would say that this probably wouldn't be the pace to get someone ready for that level of math, but for the average to struggling math student I think that MUS is a great way to get the job done. Many of my students have learning disabilities of one type or another so this is a great fit. Good luck!

Primary Arts of Language from IEW - my youngest son really enjoyed the file folder games that went along with each lesson. He needed the visual/kinesthetic and the combination of phonics and sight learning was magic for him.

Going back to last year I was in a similar place with my youngest son. I had tried many different methods at age 5 and early 6 to prepare him for reading, introducing the alphabet and phonemes, lots of reading, some Starfall games and the like. When we started Kindergarten I bought an expensive packaged curriculum for him but at the end of the year he couldn't read Bob books. I started over in 1st grade with IEW's Primary Arts of Language and found the file folder games to be a big success for us. That program uses a combination of blended phonetics and sight reading and I have found it to be a really well rounded approach. Still, as we progressed through the year even though he learned some words, he still said that he couldn't read and he wasn't able to blend phonemes when they were presented to him. C-A-T might be guessed as "dog"? Seriously. We just went through a second move in our new town, only 11 months after our first, and during that transition I noticed him going backwards in some areas of maturity but suddenly - he can read! He is reading from his brothers Pokémon cards, he can read signs, he can read just about anything but books that I give him. :huh: Anyway - for this guy I really do think that he's developmentally delayed by about 12-18 months, maybe 2 years, but he is finally catching on and I'm confident that he will be reading on level within the next few years if I keep working with him and encouraging him to read. I encourage you to investigate any possible areas of "special needs" (I have an aspie and one with functional dyslexia), there are therapies and helps for almost anything out there. But it's true, sometimes they just have to grow up a little. :lol: :grouphug:

:hug: My ds is an Aspie and just turned 14. In so many ways I have been blown away by his growing independence and ability to handle his school work on his own. There are times that he still needs my help (especially with writing assignments) and he still needs help in social situations. He was officially dx'd at age 12 but I've known it was Asperger's since he was 6 years old. He has been in social skills groups and now that we have better insurance I'm finally getting him some counseling and we are working on the meds again. The teenage years are tough even for NT kids and I think more so for SN kids. My son has been struggling with depression in the last year or so in addition to the ADD, sensory stuff and what I'm starting to realize are some tics. Meds to help with "co-morbidities" like depression and ADHD are most important in my opinion. I know that hsing is the best for him but I do anticipate that he will attend community college and hopefully get a degree from a four year school. I have plans and I think realistic hopes for him to have a group of friends and maybe even a girlfriend when he is older. I hope that he will find a career that excites him and satisfies him. Adding in a spiritual life and I think that he will be just fine. Asperger's isn't the end of the world, nor does it mean that our kids won't have a good life. I think we just need to support them and push them as required...in fact like most other kids.

:iagree: I think a marriage that requires no work and no compromise is some kind of fantasy. I've never seen one like that in real life. For that matter do you know of any long term friendships that don't at least occasionally require work/effort and compromise? I say long term because people change over time. At 40 or 50 we aren't the same people we were at 20 or 30. Interests in hobbies, strength of religious belief, decisions about values and lifestyle choices can change, if those things change in different directions for each partner it becomes hard to maintain a friendship. When you put that kind of change under the financial, social, sexual pressures of a marriage I think you can see why is it said that a good marriage requires work. I love my husband and value our family and believe in marriage...so, even though we have alot of different interests and sometimes different values, we both make compromises to make it work. My husband says that the key to a good marriage is that both partners puts the other one first. I agree. :)

Another option would be to use something like easyclassical.com where they lay out a schedule for you but you don't have to use all those expensive Sonlight packages. :)

I have an almost 7 year old and we went through most of the phonics programs you listed and nothing was sticking. I took a break over the summer (still did read alouds but didn't make him read anything because they would cause alot of frustration for him). This fall we started with IEW's Primary Arts of Reading (and Primary Arts of Writing but that's not required) and it's working! It's a *blended* sight-sound method that uses simple games that the child can quickly master on their own. My son kept saying that he couldn't read and one day realized that he was reading - using the words learned during the games. Like you we have tried Funnix and other computer reading games but the file folder games are working much better. Maybe because there is a kinesthetic learning experience when you can actually move a piece to each box...? I don't know, but this method is the most success I've had with him. Good luck! I know how frustrating this can be, but she is still young but world standards. In the public school I know that they would be panicking about a child not reading at 7.5 but in the big picture they are still just little kids. Hang in there!

Hi ladies, just want you to know that I am reading all the posts. I was already scared but now...wow! Of course I've heard of RAD but hadn't really thought about that, now I am. We are at the start of our process, 30 hours of classes to go before we even get a home study and right now I'm further back from the starting line as I digest all you have said. Thank you for your candor!

Having searched on the boards I see that several ladies here have done adoptions and foster care. Dh and I have had adoption on our hearts since we were dating. Now we've been married almost 16 years, have three children of our own and it's starting to come up again in our spirits. I've mentioned becoming foster parents/adoption to dh several times over the past five years but he was very closed to it and felt it wasn't the right time. Recently our church offered some classes that talked about adoption experiences internationally and domestic. I wanted to go but decided to not mention it to dh and prayed that if God wanted us to go He would put it on dh's heart. Sure enough, the following week dh approached me about going to the classes! We attended two classes and just went to our county orientation meeting to get signed up for the parenting classes required before your home study. So far we haven't talked to anyone in our circle about this. We are still in "pray and seek" mode. Initially, I was thinking of international adoption but the costs seem to be prohibitive. We don't have much money at all in savings/investments. We live well but pretty much paycheck to paycheck. Also we have three children already. My oldest, 14, has Asperger's/ADD, my middle son, 10, was diagnosed ADHD and we have a 6 year old with some developmental delays. All are smart and reasonably well behaved kids working at grade level. With dh's new job (started in late July) we have excellent health insurance and could offer health care so a child with special needs. We also have my mom living with us. We have lived with her on and off our entire married lives. She is on full disability. She has fibromyalgia, Sjrogen's, spinal stenosis and unknown other...is in pain a good bit and doesn't have alot of mobility. Currently she lives in our "basement" and has her own bathroom and outdoor exit. She pays us room and board. We are very close and when her health is good (maybe 20% of the time) she does help cook and watch over the kids so dh and I can get a datenight. Ok, so there is the current situation. At this point we were considering looking for an adoption of a child between 4 and 8 years old. We have been told that there aren't any children in that age range in our county but we could get qualified and look outside the county/state. I have thought that I would love to have a girl, we would also consider a sibling pair. We've also been exposed to more info about becoming foster parents. I always felt that our homeschooling would be a big problem to be a foster parent, and I know that you can't homeschool foster children...but I'm becoming more open to having the mix in my home. Any words of wisdom or advice? Dh and I are looking into taking the classes necessary for either adoption or fostering. I think my mom will be resistant initially and probably say that she doesn't think I can handle more stress since I have so much on my plate with my Aspie and ADHD kids already. But dh and I both think that we could handle it and really believe that God won't give us more than we can handle. Wow, it's just such a big decision! :tongue_smilie: I would appreciate any experiences/advice you all have.

I am always so encouraged when I watch Susan's videos. It's great to see that she has normal kids and always makes me feel like I can do it too!

I had my oldest ds in ps through the start of 4th grade while I was completing my college degree in education...the combination of what I saw in schools and how I saw his spirit being crushed (that was the exact phrase we used too) prompted me to pull him out only two months into 4th grade. Even at that young age the bullying and tormenting was horrible. I can only imagine what he would deal with now at 8th grade.

Wow, this thread is an eye opener for me! My ds, 14, is hyposensitive but this describes him exactly. When he is approaching that threshold for a major meltdown he starts itching all over in a very agitated fashion. He also has alot of seasonal allergies so I never really put this together as an adrenaline issue... but it makes more sense. I've always tried benadryl (which rarely helps much) and then a break. On school days these have always been the ones hardest to come back from. One more thing to add to a list for the developmental pediatrician we will see next January!

My almost 14 year old Aspie has taken to wearing his earbuds from his Nintendo DS when he is in a stressful or loud environment. He likes to have the game music playing in the background as well - he says it relaxes him. I guess he was onto something!

Wow thanks everyone for your responses. I will start keeping the med journal now - it makes so much sense! I guess I need to decide if it will be on the computer or a paper journal and which is easier to keep over time. Suggestions there? :) Marie, You have not offended me. I'm so sorry you took my lack of response that way. I tried the link that you sent to me and got a weird page with lots of quotes from a dr's book and I left it there. I've been busy and dealing with some health issues of my own so I was only responding to experiences that seemed to line up with my own. You didn't do anything wrong so please don't worry another second about it. Med free this weekend my son has been fine, albeit his normal somewhat grumpy teen self but no deep end experiences. I am looking forward to our appointment tomorrow because I'm very interested to see what the dr recommends. I am on the hunt for a developmental pediatrician as recommended by our therapist. I will also see if we have a pediatric psychiatrist available to us. One of those two should be available in the near future - I hope!

Thanks, I hadn't responded because I am aware of the technical definition changing. I see it as two different expressions of a similar dysfunction. You can call them the same name but they are still very different.

We just moved to this location in the last two months and have new insurance so we are dealing with all new dr's. My therapist wants us to get in to see a developmental pediatrician which she believes would provide the most help but I agree that it looks like I need to go the extra step and see a pediatric psychiatrist...I've been trying to avoid them as I know that mostly they are an expensive pill distribution system and it's hard to get away from that once you start with them.

He was a bit on the depressed side over the past few years and now at almost 14 I've observed more aggression and anger with his brothers but didn't think that was unusual. However, there was an issue where he was very angry with me and felt that I wasn't listening to him that caused him to get a knife from the kitchen and take it to his room. He says he wasn't going to hurt himself or anyone else, he just wanted to be heard. That action is what caused us to start seeing a therapist immediately. BTW, this son has severely inattentive type ADD...I have one with ADHD and it's totally different.

My son has ADD, Asperger's and has been struggling with some low level anxiety issues that were exacerbated by our recent move. Our new pediatrician initially prescribed Focalin but our insurance didn't cover it so she prescribed Vyvanse 30mg. My son initially reacted very well, it seemed to make him calm, focused and he seemed happier. However yesterday he had a meltdown of epic proportions. It started with frustration over schoolwork but then escalated. He was yelling, hitting concrete block walls, tried to cut hims arm with a letter opener(thankfully it was an antique and not sharpened and he probably knew that). I tried to calm him several times but being alone seemed to make it worse. Finally he was able to tell me that as the fit continued he was having alot of weird feelings...going from feeling "happy" (described more as hysterical) to angry to sad and back to happy, etc... this went on for about half an hour. The whole fit was probably two hours or more. He finally calmed down and seemed back in his "right mind". During the fit I tried calling his therapist (we had an appointment just that morning and he seemed fine, even euphoric she said) and his pediatrician where I left a message but noone ever called me back. I am discontinuing the Vyvanse at this time until our regularly scheduled follow-up on Tuesday afternoon. I hope that this was caused by the meds and isn't a progression of his issues. At the same time I'm wondering, now what? I recall some people experiencing bad effects from Vyvanse - does this sound at all familiar? Thanks -

:iagree:

My dh got a job in Orlando this past summer. We moved down from Jacksonville so no surprises on the weather or the bugs. The no state income tax remained the same. We chose a small town with a 45 minute commute to work for him but close everything else for me and the kids. We have found a great community with a nice sized homeschool co-op, great community with lots to offer. I love NC and would jump at a chance to live in Charlotte but we have been very happy with our move. Best of luck with the job hunt!

This is a really tough thing to do. When they were both in martial arts for a few months my NT kid quickly surpassed my older SN child and it was so frustrating for the older child. There was already a shortage of time and energy and money and then having it seem always like a battle caused me to just give up on the activities for a while (about 2 years). During that time I focused on getting my SN child into a social skills group and getting him a formal dx. I also spent alot of time getting both children up to par academically. Now that we've moved I'm struggling to right the balance. I have my oldest seeing a therapist and we are looking for an activity that would be appropriate for him. We are all in a co-op and getting out of the house more and, in addition, I have put my younger two boys into karate. They are getting out alot more. The social is a bit hard on me and is very challenging balancing the time needs vs the level of academics I was getting before. I've decided for this period we will get the basics in school and allow alot more time to get into social and activities especially for the younger boys. I feel like this is one of those areas that will constantly be fluctuating to meet the needs of the family.

An update: I had him evaluated by a local speech therapist through the public school system and she noticed the things that I had seen but said that his speech was still developmentally appropriate. She said that if his teachers at our co-op or other classes confirmed that they couldnt' understand him a large percentage of time we could still qualify for therapy but they have said that they can understand him as long as he doesn't get excited and start talking quickly. On the reading front he loves IEW's new PAL/PAW. It consists of lots of file folder games along with a few worksheets and practice reading. The games provide a kinesthetic factor for those younger boys learning to read (who really need it) and he seems to be more motivated this year. I"m encouraged that he actually is more and more interested in trying to read.

Yeah, we have been using Melatonin since Kindergarten. It worked for a few years but the past three or four not so much. At this point his teenager thing has made it even so much worse that there are nights he can't get to sleep until after 2-3 am. I can't even imagine how we would cope if he had to follow a regular school schedule. Decided to do a trial with the Vyvanse, we are on day 1 and so far I have seen him voluntarily brush his youngest brothers hair and told his middle brother that he loved him (in the middle of a lecture but still...) No really, I swear. I'm very hopeful that this medication will take off the anxiety and the other issues that have been masking his sweet disposition. Maybe he will even be able to sleep if his brain isn't cycling so much? I'll let you know. :D

Update: The doc changed the rx to Vyvanse and I can pick it up today. Working on a budget for our new home/city/job here and wondering if anyone has had luck using the "generic" alternatives - for Vyvanse my insurance recommends dextroamphetamine salts... Also looking into Clonidine for getting him to sleep - I suspect that ADD and anxiety would be much better if he could get a good 8-10 hours of sleep at night. Thoughts?