bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 (edited) Alrighty hive- I posted last week asking if I should bother following up with a doc for my son's clavicle bone break. You helped me talk it through and made me realize that yes, I need to take him to the doc. So I did. I was immediately referred to an orthopedic specialist and given a doctors note excusing him from PE until cleared by ortho doc. DS returned to school Friday (he started PS this year for first time) with note in hand. They still sent him to PE. I know that kids with notes go to the library. I want hm in the library for 2 reasons.... 1- the break is borderline displaced. Since clavicle breaks aren't casted, I feel he is extra vulnerable to making it worse, especially in PE. 2- I don't want him spending the next 5 weeks watching the other kids in his class do their activities while he does absolutely nothing. To me it is a waste of time. I'd rather him be in the library reading or doing school work. I just went to the office to politely inquire as to why he was still sent to PE with his doctors note. I was told library kiddos are those with leg injuries only. Since he only has an arm injury, he can still participate in that if the other kids are running, he can walk, etc. i reiterated that I want him in the library. They are speaking with the principal and will get back to me. i feel like there is a disconnect here. What am I missing? ETA- this is not a JAwM. I would really like to hear any insight or other views that I'm not seeing at this point. Update- after calming down quite a bit I wrote an email to the principal outlining the sequence of events, the issues I took with said events, and reiterated my request for a safe location for ds to stay during PE. I also sent a second doctor's note into the office. The principal apologized and is now providing an alternative location for ds to stay until he is cleared by doc. Ds commented yesterday on how he felt such a big ordeal was being made over this. 😟 Thank you everyone for your help with this! Edited October 26, 2017 by bodiesmom 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anne Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 You are missing nothing. There is a disconnect. Stick to your guns. Would be terrible for your son to have to sit and watch other kids be active for the next 4-5 weeks and being tempted to participate (which he will be!). Anne 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 Thank you, Anne. It was even more frustrating to immediately sense the shunning and disdain the office staff started showing me once it was clear that I was going to hold my ground in pursuing this. I instantly became one of " those parents". It didn't matter that I was polite and cordial. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junie Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 I agree with you that your son's time would probably be better used in the library, but IME: I went to public school, but it was a long time ago. Kids with notes were expected to sit on the sidelines and watch. Sometimes we learned rules for certain sports, i.e. basketball or tennis and had tests. Your son would still be able to participate in those things. Other times, if we were already outside, injured kids were told to walk on the track. Again, IME, public school is all about wasting time. That argument will probably not fly because that is the culture that they are used to. Wasting time doesn't matter to them. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 Their retort to that, happysmilelylady, is that he needs to attend the class so he can be there for the discussions when they learn about basketball, or whatever the sport is that they are focusing on for the month. 🙄 We have a girl in our neighborhood, who is friends with my son and is in his PE class, who has been in the library since the 2nd week of school due to a knee injury. I don't know the extent of her injury. I just know that she has a brace and absolutely can walk and run with ease. She doesn't have a cast, she doesn't have crutches, and she is active. And yet, she is allowed to work in the library. I'm wondering if this is somehow coloring my view of this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 I agree with you that your son's time would probably be better used in the library, but IME: I went to public school, but it was a long time ago. Kids with notes were expected to sit on the sidelines and watch. Sometimes we learned rules for certain sports, i.e. basketball or tennis and had tests. Your son would still be able to participate in those things. Other times, if we were already outside, injured kids were told to walk on the track. Again, IME, public school is all about wasting time. That argument will probably not fly because that is the culture that they are used to. Wasting time doesn't matter to them. Junie- you have a valid point. However, if ALL injured kids were required to sit on the sidelines, it would be different. I would still resent the fact that he is just wasting time, but I wouldn't make a stink of it because he would be expected to do what all kids are required to do. That isn't the case here. They are classifying the injuries, and it's making no sense to me. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ktgrok Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 He should NOT be participating in any way. If he falls while running or whatever he could injure it again. Or if he gets jostled. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 After thinking about it more, if he had a broken arm that had a protective cast, I'd be fine with all of this. But this particular injury seems so much more vulnerable. That's what's bothering me- one bump from an active kiddo, or whatever, and he falls and really breaks that sucker, requiring surgery. Yeah, my mind goes there..... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
almondbutterandjelly Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 I think you might need to talk to the PE teacher and make it clear about not participating. Office staff don't generally know a whole lot. I bet the PE teacher will be fine with your library preference. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 I think you might need to talk to the PE teacher and make it clear about not participating. Office staff don't generally know a whole lot. I bet the PE teacher will be fine with your library preference. Wellll.....according to my kiddo, he was told by the PE teacher on Friday that he could still do "some activities". Obviously i need to consider that I didn't actually hear the teacher say this, but it doesn't bode well in terms of any confidence I have in the PE teacher. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 thats exactly why the doc gave a non participation note. Said to office staff: "So what you're saying is that you and the coach and the school want to be personally liable for pain and suffering, medical expenses and all other costs if his injury is made worse by going to P.E." Honestly, I don't get this. As a P.E. teacher, don't they realize how vulnerable they are to asking a child to violate doctor's orders? Espcially in this lawsuit happy time? 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 Just heard back from the counselor. She said, per the principal, he will continue to attend the PE class. He needs to, according to her, be there for the instruction portion of the class. I then ask, "since the majority of time spent in PE is active, not instructional time, you are expecting him to sit and watch the kids for the next 5 weeks?" She answers yes. I then became a little irritated and asked why they are allowing kiddos with lower body injuries to stay in the library, while kids with upper, UNPROTECTED injuries, are being required to attend PE. How does that make sense??? I also said look, my son sees this other student active in his own neighborhood who has a "pass" to the library, while he does not. How can that be? How am I to explain that to an 11 year old?? (Okay, probably shouldn't have gone mama bear like that, but seriously....come on!!) She finally said to talk to the principal. Why does this anger me so much??? How did this blow up into such a big gigantic deal? I fully expected to walk in there this morning and them tell me oops, we didn't see the note that said excused from PE. Nope. I got this!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 Is there a way to get back in touch with the doctor for an extra detailing exactly what your DS should not be doing? I remember in junior high, I think, my PE teacher tried to fudge my doctor's note and my mom went to the doctor who got downright angry and wrote out a second note explaining, in no uncertain terms, that I was NOT to be doing anything physical. We have an appt tomorrow with the orthopedic doc. 😄 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
almondbutterandjelly Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Document, document, document. In case you need to send an angry email/certified letter very soon (cc perhaps the district's legal dept and/or superintendent) listing when the doctor's note was provided to the school, what it said, and the dates that the school knowingly violated doctor's orders and jeopardized the health of your child. Also document the conversations you had with staff about it, list names and dates and times. Include those in the angry letter. Your anger is correct. Protect your kid. They are wrong. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 Thank you for the reminder, Perkybunch. I'm documenting as best I can now. Today the 60 kids were all in the gym shooting hoops. My ds said he just parked it against the wall and watched. He mentioned that the PE teacher came over and joked how he was going to be bored for the next 6 weeks. I think the teacher was just trying to sympathize with him, but it does illustrate my point. he also mentioned that he was hit in the gut with a rogue basketball today. It didn't injure him obviously, but it did hurt when he reacted. Again, not trying to make a big deal out of that, but it does illustrate my other point. 😡😡😡😡 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daria Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Thank you for the reminder, Perkybunch. I'm documenting as best I can now. Today the 60 kids were all in the gym shooting hoops. My ds said he just parked it against the wall and watched. He mentioned that the PE teacher came over and joked how he was going to be bored for the next 6 weeks. I think the teacher was just trying to sympathize with him, but it does illustrate my point. he also mentioned that he was hit in the gut with a rogue basketball today. It didn't injure him obviously, but it did hurt when he reacted. Again, not trying to make a big deal out of that, but it does illustrate my other point. 😡😡😡😡 I was going to post that if the rule was applied equally, I'd understand the policy of needing to watch P.E.. But this changes that. At our school, the kids who can't participate are up in the bleachers. They can bring HW to do during the things they can't participate in, and are expected to do things like journalling or taking written test on sports rules. But because they're in the bleachers, they're protected from the athletes accidentally running into them. Standing against a wall where kids can run into him is a whole different thing. I hope the Dr. can write a note that's specific enough to get him excused. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 See, that makes sense. All kids with injuries who have doctors notes excusing them from PE are treated equally and are given an area where they can do something productive, participate from afar, whatever. Nope. Not here. The counselor literally said those with leg injuries are allowed in the library. Those with upper body injuries must still attend the class. Regardless of the doctors note. Since the kiddos are currently learning basketball, the bleachers are stacked against the wall. The only sitting area is the 6 foot perimeter between the court and the wall. They do one sport about every 6 weeks or so. They just started basketball last week. I'm floored. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairfarmhand Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Thank you for the reminder, Perkybunch. I'm documenting as best I can now. Today the 60 kids were all in the gym shooting hoops. My ds said he just parked it against the wall and watched. He mentioned that the PE teacher came over and joked how he was going to be bored for the next 6 weeks. I think the teacher was just trying to sympathize with him, but it does illustrate my point. he also mentioned that he was hit in the gut with a rogue basketball today. It didn't injure him obviously, but it did hurt when he reacted. Again, not trying to make a big deal out of that, but it does illustrate my other point. 😡😡😡😡 In the coach's place, I would be lobbying to get this kid outta my class. There is such a high risk of his injury being aggravated, and I wouldn't want it happening on my watch. Can you email the coach directly and sweetly remind him that this injury is still under evaluation? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jann in TX Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 BTDT-- My youngest dd attends PS. In 7th grade she fell onto the bleachers IN PE and injured her collar bone (separation). She ended up with a Dr's note. They (coaches) had her 'sit' on the 6ft sideline during PE instead of sending her to the library. DD was then injured (foot) because of a rogue ball/kid collision that tripped her while walking out of class. I went MOMMA BEAR. Her shoulder was not re-injured (lucky for them) but DD was then allowed to go to the library until she healed (now 2 Dr's notes!). After that any student with a Dr note can go to the library if they ask-- it is a safety issue. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 (edited) Since this week is conference week and the kids only go to school for 3 hours (including a lunch period) I'm going to keep him home tomorrow. Tomorrow is the orthopedic doc appointment so I will explain the insane situation to him, what my concerns are, how the school is handling the first "no PE note", and go from there. My hope is that the doctor will provide a more detailed note, spelling out exactly what needs to be done to avoid further risk of injury. Once I calm down, I will pen a very detailed, yet composed, letter voicing my concerns/anger, etc. over this situation. If I went down there now I wouldn't be able to even see the principal as he is sitting in on conferences. I'm just....blown away. ETa- Jann- oh my word. I'm so sorry that happened. What is it with some of these schools?!!! Edited October 23, 2017 by bodiesmom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bodiesmom Posted October 26, 2017 Author Share Posted October 26, 2017 Brief update in OP Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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