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What do you recommend for someone considering homeschooling?


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A lady asked me about homeschooling. Her oldest is about 3, and she's always thought she would do it. Lately, she's been concerned that he doesn't obey her well enough to make it work and sees that he's the "perfect child" when he's in a classroom (I'm assuming a children's class at church). She believes in homeschooling, but is beginning to be unsure that it would work well for her family.

 

It's been so long since we made this decision, and I'm not sure I'm very "typical" anyway. I did a bunch of reading at Elijah Co.'s site, researched different approaches, etc., etc. What books, websites, etc. would you recommend for my friend's situation? Her question seems partly about parenting and partly thinking-about-homeschooling.

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Kids are always better for other people. That doesn't mean they should spend the majority of their time with a non-parent. :)

 

I'd recommend a book that shows lots of different homeschooling families. There are a half-dozen "day in the life of..." type books - check your library first (assuming she uses the same one). If she's not sure about the whole idea of homeschooling, anything by John Taylor Gatto is great: easy to read and very convincing.

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If I had based our HS decision on how my kid behaved at 3 ... well, let's just say he would've been a great candidate for Supernanny. :) He is a very intense kid emotionally, was very prone to tantrums, but too shy to explain concerns to his preschool teachers so was a 'good' but wiggly kid for others. He also had some autistic behaviors. And our attempts at practice homeschooling were pretty rough. He was/is very bright, but never demonstrated his knowledge to his teachers. (In his 4yo class they were telling me I needed to work on his 1-10 number recognition because he wouldn't do the worksheets correctly. In reality ... the kid was trying to teach himself multiplication already. But they never saw any of that.)

 

Fortunately he outgrew the worst of it, and my expectations got more realistic too. :) He's a bright, quirky kid with a sensitive nature who does very well in his small group classes (Sunday School, scouts, and so on), but has a harder time in large groups and would probably end up being a troublemaker in a regular classroom.

 

I guess I'm just saying, tell her to give it some time. Kids mature a lot (specially when they're home and you have to work on the discipline issues or go crazy, LOL), and the school years will get easier.

 

It's also not an all-or-nothing decision. A few mornings in a mom's day out program might be fun for both of them. Perhaps there's a good co-op homeschool program in her area so she won't feel she's bearing the whole educational burden. And so on.

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  • 2 weeks later...

This advice could have been written for me...I'm freaking out because of some really minor (in the big picture) discipline issues. Our daughter is 3.5, and she's 3.5...KWIM? She's driving me nuts every morning with the dawdling! All I can think is that if this is how it is when it's time for school, I'm not going to make it!

 

She also picked up somewhere that HS is not "real school." This is a far greater concern for me, but I'm slowly trying to work it out without making a big deal out of it all.

 

Thanks for listening to me! :)

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A lady asked me about homeschooling. Her oldest is about 3, and she's always thought she would do it. Lately, she's been concerned that he doesn't obey her well enough to make it work and sees that he's the "perfect child" when he's in a classroom (I'm assuming a children's class at church). She believes in homeschooling, but is beginning to be unsure that it would work well for her family.

 

It's been so long since we made this decision, and I'm not sure I'm very "typical" anyway. I did a bunch of reading at Elijah Co.'s site, researched different approaches, etc., etc. What books, websites, etc. would you recommend for my friend's situation? Her question seems partly about parenting and partly thinking-about-homeschooling.

 

I like the book So You're Thinking About Homeschooling by Lisa Welchel because it showcases a lot of different families and homeschooling approaches.

 

As for the thought about behavior at home vs out, I'd always prefer that my kids behaved respectfully and politely out of the house and saved their tantrums for home where we have the liberty to deal with it. Developing a relationship that combines mutual respect, obedience and tolerance for individual preferences takes, oh a lifetime. :001_smile:

 

I explain to people that there are days that we work lots on academics and days that the main thing we get done is to work on heart issues. My kids have good and bad days and so do I. But homeschooling is an opportunity to really work on your relationship with your kids.

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Those nagging doubts can creep in there, so I beat them back with John Taylor Gatto (as a pp recommended).

 

Also, my ds is a completely different animal at 4 than he was at 3, which is probably true for a lot of kids.

 

Talking with other hs'ers will help her, too.

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Homeschooling: A Patchwork of Days really made me see what homeschooling looked like, it showed several different families with several different approaches. They each wrote about a "typical day" and then they all explained how every day was a little different!

 

Of course, I'd already decided to homeschool when I read it, so I don't really know how persuasive it would be.

Edited by ElizabethB
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Teaching the Trivium, WTM, and even Leigh Bortin's is good. (ClassicalConversations.com) You can read it online for free...or download and print... I LOVE Latin Centered Curriculum... Those four are my top...for a beginner right now... I think the Leigh Bortin's one is the easiest, most concise one...and the Teaching the Trivium would be my second...and then the LLC and WTM just to see what fits your family/child best.

 

Carrie:-)

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I was initially going to recommend a book but upon rereading your question there is no book to recommend. Her child is 3, how they behave at 3, 5, 10 and more is going to be totally different. I think it would be impossible to base a decision about homeschooling on the behavior of a 3 year old. The perfect 3 could be a 5 full of energy and unable to sit still or vice versa. The only advice I would give is to work on having a good and mutually respectful relationship with your child and read. Having the child sit with you while you read out loud, draw together, garden together, run errands together, have the child participate in the life of the family with you. A final decision on homeschooling can wait.

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