Mom22ns Posted March 10, 2016 Share Posted March 10, 2016 Yes! I'll pray for the little trollops. On a related note, my 7yo dd was wearing jeggings and a halter top the other day. I suppose I'd better start pricing rehab centers and abortion providers. :lol: My dd wears leggings almost exclusively. She looks fabulous in a halter top (not warm enough for that here right now), because she's been a competitive gymnast for 11 years and her shoulders are ripped! I guess I should consider myself lucky that she isn't strung out or on her way to the abortion clinic now. Or maybe I'm just such a terrible parent I don't know about all the drugs and men my loose standards have led her to. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MercyA Posted March 10, 2016 Share Posted March 10, 2016 Rachel (my favorite Christian commentator and writer) on the topic. The "modesty" (and many other Christian habits of discussion and behavior) almost always focus on the responsibility of women in ways that diminish their power, status, and role. Thank you for sharing the link, Joanne. I think the author makes a few valid points, but I do take issue with her conclusion that as a Christian woman, I should just wear what's comfortable and ethically produced (although I do appreciate the shout out to ethically produced clothing!). As I said upthread, my responsibility to avoid being a stumbling block is a completely separate issue from the responsibility of others to guard their thoughts. I believe Christians are called to be servants, thinking of others first, submitting to each other, loving each other, helping each other. Christianity is not about “my rights.†One example that comes to mind is drinking. At my co-op, we occasionally go to an Italian restaurant for Mom's Night Out. Would I love to have a glass of wine with my pasta? Definitely yes, and I believe Scripture supports me in doing so. However, I don't partake, because I know it would be a cause for stumbling for others. I suppose technically it infringes on my rights, but following Christ is more important to me than a glass of wine. As Paul wrote in Romans 14, “So then we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another. Do not tear down the work of God for the sake of food. All things indeed are clean, but they are evil for the man who eats and gives offense. It is good not to eat meat or to drink wine, or to do anything by which your brother stumbles.†And again in 1 Corinthians 8, “Therefore, if food causes my brother to stumble, I will never eat meat again, so that I will not cause my brother to stumble.†So, knowing that wearing a skimpy bikini may not be helpful to brothers who are trying avoid lust, I wear a modest bathing suit. It is a small thing for me to do to help someone else on their Christian walk, even though they are fully responsible for their own actions. I hope that makes sense. :) I feel confident, strong, and even powerful in my modest dress and head covering, knowing that even the angels take note. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pen Posted March 10, 2016 Share Posted March 10, 2016 My dd16 claims that when she is a mother, she will not limit what her kids wear at all. Part of me wants to just throw in the towel and adopt this philosophy myself. As things stand now, I feel like dd is at one extreme (if it's cute, wear it!) and my dh is at the other (very aware of modesty). I try to be this mediator but it's exhausting... interpreting his convictions to her, making a case for her perspective to him... but if I stop, I'm afraid it will be extremely messy. Dh isn't intractable; he came around on bikinis and shorter shorts. But he is definitely way less comfortable than we are in terms of skirt length, skin-tight jeans, and that kind of thing. I am not of the mindset that women are responsible for the thought lives of men, but I'm also not of the "whatever, I don't care how much of your body you show to the world" mindset. As a Christian, I think there is such a thing as dressing in a God-honoring way. But I don't know what that means when it comes to teenagers, and I also don't know how you navigate giving a teen more and more freedom to make certain calls herself. I realize this is a touchy thing because of patriarchy and legalistic stuff. But I also feel like it's an age-old thing... Dad doesn't want his girl dressing "like that" because "he knows how boys think"... Mom being more sympathetic to fashion and the desire to be cute... daughter wishing she was completely unfettered by parental guidance... sigh. I am just weary of it. Prom is coming up and I wish it could just be a fun thing (shopping for a dress) but instead it feels like it's just going to be stressful, trying to find some middle ground between hooker and Puritan (yes, I exaggerate). Does anyone else feel like this? Any tips on how you navigate? Are you and dh on the same page when it comes to how your teen girls dress and if not, how do you work this out without it being a big mess? And please, please, please can we not turn this into a modesty debate? I'm wondering what has ended up happening with dd16? If prom clothing choices still remain ahead, maybe dd and dh could go shopping and work it out as between the two of them without you in the middle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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