When attending a birthday party that requests donations instead of gifts

[lynn]

do you still bring a gift for the birthday child or just give a card?  This child is dd classmate.  The invite specifically asks  for donations for lunches of love instead of gifts.  

[Ethel Mertz]

No to the gift. Yes (if you like) to the card.

[Kimberly in IN]

We almost always do birthdays with a request for a food bank donation instead of gifts for our dc parties and very much mean that ... no gifts, please, food donation in place of gift. Cards are optional. In our experience, we have found that girls tend to give cards, boys do not. (just saying in our experience, at our dc parties, not making any wide spread generalizations :) )

[displace]

Depending on the age we would not bring a gift but maybe a card or balloon, or maybe a book.

[Lieutenant Stranger]

Don't bring a gift. We used to try to do this for fun causes my daughter enjoyed-- animals, library, etc, but everyone always felt they were special and brought gifts anyway. 

 

It really makes things awkward for everyone involved. 

[rjand6more]

When I say no gifts on invites, I really mean it!   Definitely do the donation though.  We have done this for a local ministry my daughter volunteers for.  She felt SO special being able to give that donation.

[SKL]

Don't bring a gift.  But if you MUST give a gift, be discreet about it.  Don't make others feel awkward for obeying the host's request.

[Jenny in Florida]

Please don't bring a gift to a no-gifts-requested party. "Instead of" means "instead of." A card is nice, though, if you feel awkward going empty handed.

[Joker]

Don't take a gift. It makes things awkward. Oldest requested a donations only party earlier this year and a few girls brought gifts. Dd refused to open anything while they were here out of respect for those who honored her wishes and didn't bring anything. It was just weird. A card is fine and she enjoyed them, but she felt unable to even open those since some were attached to gifts.