DD1 doesn't like reading

[momma2three]

And it's just so foreign to me, I don't know what to do about it.

 

She's actually a very good reader.  Could read at a "high 2nd grade" level according to her K teacher last year, and I had her do a probably-not-great online test recently that pegged her as reading at a 4th grade level.  She can read nearly anything kid-friendly that you hand her.  She reads signs and store packaging and over my shoulder while I'm on the computer.

 

She had her eyes checked recently, so it's not that.

 

The thing that I really don't understand is that she loves LOOKING AT books.  Ever since she could sit up, she's been able to spend hours just looking through picture books.  Seriously, when she was 6 months old she would spend upwards of an hour a day, just silently sitting there, slowly turning the pages of board books.  It's not like she's a super active, hates-sitting-down kind of kid... that, I would totally understand and see the connection.

 

I've done all the obvious things... given her just about every genre I could think of.  Taken her to the library and to bookstores and tried to get her to pick things out.  No interest.  I don't want reading to be a chore, so I haven't exerted any pressure on her until relatively recently, when I decided that it's just not happening on its own.  Only once did I make her pick out a book, and I felt like an idiot forcing her, saying "We are not leaving until you find one that you want to read" while she whined about how she didn't want ANY of them.  And she's a super girly girl, in a field of early chapter books about fairies, princesses, cute animals, and all the stuff she loves (and which I don't, so she should realize this is her chance to get some Disney Princess thing that I normally wouldn't buy her!)

 

Anyone BTDT?  Stories with happy endings?  Ideas besides the non-obvious ones?  I have a MLS, and have worked with kids for years, and love children's books, so I feel like I'm familiar with a pretty wide range of children's literature, and have tried all sorts of options.  Even though I had planned to just let her read what she wants to for a few years, until we start a literature program, I've had started assigning her books, or else she never reads.  And she reads a chapter and tells me about it, but has no interest in reading further than the assigned chapter, and whines and moans when I ask her to read more.

 

Me: And then what happened?

Her: And then she opened the door, and she couldn't believe who was standing there.

Me: Who was standing there?
Her: I don't know.  It was the end of the chapter.  It just said she couldn't believe who was standing there.

Me: Don't you want to find out who was standing there?

Her: No, not really.  Can I go play now?

:confused1:

 

I loved books, and she's always struck me as someone who would love books, and she does love books... I just don't understand why she doesn't enjoy reading books.

[Ellie]

Some people just don't enjoy reading.

 

I don't think you really have a problem. Read good books *to* her so you know they're in her brain, and let it go.

[msrift]

Sounds like my kids. Very strong early readers, but wouldn't touch literature with a ten foot pole. Oldest even said he hated reading more than once. I backed off and let them read what they wanted to, mainly nonfiction and graphic novels. We still did read-alouds and books on tape, both of which they enjoyed very much. Finally, around 9yrs old they just decided to pick up a fiction book and devoured it in one day. (For one it was Harry Potter, for another Hunger Games.) After that, there's been no stopping them. So there's hope! 

 

[itsheresomewhere]

She is very young.  She may turn to be love reading as she is older or she may just not like reading. 

[Guest submarines]

I thought you were talking about a 6th grader, not a 6 year old. :tongue_smilie: I think it is way too early to label her as a kid who doesn't like reading.

 

The fact that she can read doesn't mean that this is a developmentally appropriate activity for her. I have a 5.5 yo DD who loves looking through picture books--the stories that she makes up in her head, well, they are awesome. They are way better thanf books designed for Grade 1 reading level. DD is not a reader yet, but I'm one of those who prefer to wait. Their lives at 5 and 6 are so rich in so many other ways, and I feel that reading it almost too limiting, or, at the very least, not exactly relevant to their lives. I'm quite sure that DD would be able to read quite easily in a few lessons--she knows all the letters, she can read syllables, but again, this is not something I'd ever rush into.

 

What books are you assigning her? Many of the "age appropriate" books for a 6 yo are either terribly dull or terribly contrived in an a attempt to sound exciting and "lure" the readers in. A chapter ending with "She couldn't believe what was behind the door" seems like one of those books that are trying too hard.

 

Does she enjoy read alouds? Love for great literature is much more important than love for the act of reading.

[zoobie]

Give it time! My DS didn't start loving reading until late 7, though he's an excellent reader and reading came early and easily to him. He will occasionally stay up until the wee hours reading a book, but he has to choose the book. He balks at my suggestions. My oldest read above grade level but didn't love it, and she turned out to have dyslexia (diagnosed at 8.5). She loves reading now. Maybe not like I did at her age, but I think it's good she has other interests too. I didn't want to do anything but read.

 

Really, 6 is SO YOUNG! I'd back off a bit and let her come to the books. Let her look at the pictures and get drawn into the words on her time.

[Night Elf]

My youngest dd learned to read early. She was in public school for 2nd grade and one of the reasons we pulled her out is because the teacher kept assigning her AR books that were above her age range. The students took tests for points after reading books and the classroom with the highest points won a pizza party at the end of the year. Higher level books meant higher points. By the time I took my dd out of school, she refused to read anything more than a Berenstain Bears book for over 6 months. So please don't force reading on your child or you may kill any desire for him to explore it on his own. I do think reading aloud is good. It's supposed to be really good for kids because you can read, and they can enjoy, books they couldn't read on their own. It also gives you a chance to talk about it with your child while you're reading to make sure the comprehension is there. It's a great chance to build vocabulary.

[amo_mea_filiis.]

If you figure it out, let me know please!

 

My 9 year old just doesn't read. I'm not even sure where his reading is at because he fights it that much.

[BrookValley.]

Wow, I think your DD is the clone of my DS. I even gave him a crappy online 4th grade reading assessment, too. Lol. And, like you, the idea of not loving books is very foreign to me.

 

I'm taking a very hands-off approach. Really, they are only six. Remind yourself of that often, even if they act like little grownups. :) I do not assign reading (or writing, beyond a little bit of copywork and his spelling words/phrases/sentences). The thing is--and it sounds like your DD is similar--he *does* love books. We find him asleep in bed with a dozen well-loved picture books around and under him nearly every night. He also loves to be read to or listen to audiobooks. So I'm working on cultivating his love of a good story--really, isn't it all the same? I figure he'll either love reading later or he won't, but in the meantime, I hope to not make him hate it.

 

So, we listen to lots of audiobooks. Also, he does sometimes like to read chapter books if we alternate reading aloud to each other. So he'll read me a page or two, then I'll read him a page or two and so on. But I never asign this or force the issue. Either he wants to or he doesn't, no biggie.

[Amy in NH]

She's still very young.  You're probably pushing her outside her comfort zone which isn't always a bad thing, but working hard at something doesn't make it fun.  Let her build up her confidence on easy stuff.  Keep her reading aloud  to you for 20 minutes per day, with maybe an extra 10 minutes of looking at books quietly by herself (picture books are fine) and she'll get there eventually.  Choose funny things to read together - like Frog & Toad, Amelia Bedelia, Noodle Stories, etc.  And of course you're snuggling up together while you read interesting literature aloud to her...

[momma2three]

Thanks everyone, you're making me feel better.

 

BrookValley, I'm always afraid her bed is going to collapse under the weight of all the books she keeps up there.  She stays up waaay too late looking at books.  But no interest in reading them.

 

I've decided to start using the soul-sucking leveled reading textbooks that we all hated so much in elementary school.  I actually used a 1st grade one last year to help teach her to read (it was basically all reprints of very well-chosen early readers, but much larger and with a craft project at the end of each one).  I have another 1st grade one (Silver Burdett & Ginn's series starting with Make-A-Wish... it says "level 4," but levels 1-3 are short paperback readers meant for kindergarten), which is actually a little bit harder than the one we used last year (it's older, which is interesting... so much for 1st grade being so much easier way back when!), and it doesn't have the craft projects but it has some comprehension questions at the end that we can talk about together.

 

The thing is that the only way she'll be a good reader is if she practices reading, and I don't want to make her hate chapter books by forcing them on her.  So if we do one story a week from this textbook, it's gentle and short enough and with enough interesting pictures that she'll like it.  That way she'll at least get some practice in.

[Guest submarines]

Thanks everyone, you're making me feel better.

 

BrookValley, I'm always afraid her bed is going to collapse under the weight of all the books she keeps up there.  She stays up waaay too late looking at books.  But no interest in reading them.

 

I've decided to start using the soul-sucking leveled reading textbooks that we all hated so much in elementary school.  I actually used a 1st grade one last year to help teach her to read (it was basically all reprints of very well-chosen early readers, but much larger and with a craft project at the end of each one).  I have another 1st grade one (Silver Burdett & Ginn's series starting with Make-A-Wish... it says "level 4," but levels 1-3 are short paperback readers meant for kindergarten), which is actually a little bit harder than the one we used last year (it's older, which is interesting... so much for 1st grade being so much easier way back when!), and it doesn't have the craft projects but it has some comprehension questions at the end that we can talk about together.

 

The thing is that the only way she'll be a good reader is if she practices reading, and I don't want to make her hate chapter books by forcing them on her.  So if we do one story a week from this textbook, it's gentle and short enough and with enough interesting pictures that she'll like it.  That way she'll at least get some practice in.

 

The bolded is not true for every child. When they are developmentally ready, they read very well almost right away, without needing much practice. DD11 and DS9 started reading fluently between ages 7 and 8, reading real books, without much scheduled practice. This is true for many, many children as well. Before they were readers we listened to audiobooks and I read a lot to them.

 

Children in schools miss out when they are not reading early, as so much of the teaching relies on crowd control and them being able to read independently. What does a homeschooled child miss by being a fluent reader at, let's say 7, instead of 5 or 6?

[texasmama]

My 11 year old was as you describe.  He now reads voraciously.  It just took him time to grow into the love of reading.  Dh and I are readers so it was foreign to us that we would have a child who didn't enjoy reading. 

 

The 11 year old is sitting a few feet away from me currently reading Schindler's List so yes, he is over not liking to read.  He just needed to find a topic he was interested in.

[nd293]

Sounds like ds7. He's a strong reader (although highly disrespectful of puntuation marks!), but doesn't want to read. He learnt to read because I insisted. He read first chapter books with some enjoyment, but once he was reading those in one sitting I bumped him to more substantial easy chapter books and he lost interest. In some ways the fact that he has been exposed to lots of literature through audiobooks works against us, as I think he wants the whole story quickly, and doesn't have the patience to wade through longer books, nor the maturity to read for extended periods.

 

I recently pulled out the Brain Quest reading cards we have, and he loves those. He likes reading the short story and answering questions. He asks to read more. He's very achievement / results oriented, and doesn't like to be stretched to a point where he is not easily succeeding, so I think this format works better for him. For now I'm backing off from 'real books' and focusing on reading he enjoys in a format he enjoys. I insist on 1 card a day, but he's currently doing a few a day, by choice.