laughing lioness Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Is it expected that your kids will go directly to college? Did any of your kids take a "gap year?" If so, what did they do and how did they pay for it? Anyone with kids who aren't "academically oriented?" What are your expectations for those kids? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
readwithem Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Both times I've heard SWB speak, she has mentioned gap years and how she can tell a difference between 18 yo and 19 yo students in her classes at W&M. She suggests reading more great books, travel and working in an office (once she added "to figure out that's not what they want to do for the rest of their lives" :) We're not there yet but I think we will do something to stretch out that time, probably a combo of college courses and work, while still living at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alphabetika Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 We are not there yet, but we have friends whose dd graduated (not from homeschool) and took a gap year doing missions work in the Philippines. She is thrilled that she did so, and will be entering a private college this fall with no problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Begonia Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 My older dd (not homeschooled) took a gap year. She worked in a couple of local stores for several months and used the money earned to travel through Italy, Greece and Turkey. She viewed the travel as a culmination of her classical high school education. Her universtiy (UVa) gave her permission to take the gap year. Their only request was that she not take any coursework at another school during that year prior to coming to UVa. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
outtamyshell Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Do these kids in gap years then drop off your health insurance? I can think of 100 great ways to spend that year, but I don't know how we'd cover the health insurance requirement. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Begonia Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Do these kids in gap years then drop off your health insurance? Hmm. Not in our case. Our older dd is still on our health insurance. She's now 21yo and full-time in college. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen in VA Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Our insurance drops kids who are over 18 and not in school full-time. (Dh investigated this just for kicks several years ago.) On our health plan, if the kids are full-time students, they will be covered until they are 24 or married. For us, doing a gap year would cause major issues with health insurance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TravelingChris Posted July 23, 2008 Share Posted July 23, 2008 Our son didn't do a gap year. I can't see either of our daughters doing that unless they have some very compelling reason, like medical. We don't plan on spending our resources in funding a year of travel or anything like that. I can't say that we may not change our minds if one of them has an excellent plan and a compelling argument. As it is, our older dd is itching to join the military or become a police officer already and she is just turning 15 next month. (She will be allowed to join once she graduates but she prefers to become an officer so she plans to go to college first). My kids have had lots of travel with us so I guess I don't see the necessity to fund them separately. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
momof2boys Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 My oldest is going inot the 11th grade this fall and he plans to work with his dad for a year after graduation and then he says he will attend college after that. My husband and I would prefer that he go straight to college after graduation but he is one of those kids that you cannot force to do anything. We tried to push the issue with him and it just made him all the more determined to do things his way. So we have backed off and have decided to let him choose his own path.(even though this is hard for us) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwen in VA Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 We have raised our kids with the idea that they will go directly on to college from high school....... But we have made it clear that that is the general plan, not the specific plan for each child, and that if one of them, after prayerfully thinking through options, come to the conclusion that they should NOT go directly to college (meaning either that they want to do a gap year or that they don't want to go to college at all at this point) we are open to listen to their plans. We will certainly not force kids to go to college, but college is the default plan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renee in NC Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 Our insurance drops kids who are over 18 and not in school full-time. (Dh investigated this just for kicks several years ago.) On our health plan, if the kids are full-time students, they will be covered until they are 24 or married. For us, doing a gap year would cause major issues with health insurance. Have you priced individual policies for young adults? If they have no pre-existings, coverage is pretty cheap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted July 24, 2008 Share Posted July 24, 2008 My oldest son is totally uninterested in the gap year idea. He wants to get on with his life! Of course, he is almost 19 already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bettyandbob Posted July 25, 2008 Share Posted July 25, 2008 he will be 17 when he enrolls. He skipped a grade. I skipped 2 and was 16. It was very hard for me. Ds is very immature for his age as it is and is a bundle of anxiety. With that background, I think a gap year could be very good. However, it has to be productive and I am in no position to fund travel for the sake of travel. I don't get to go anywhere myself. So, if ds were to do a long mission trip or other volunteer activity that would be good. If ds got an internship at a business that he thinks he may have an interest, then that would be good. I am broad minded about what business it could be. I think a child who has a chance to try to be a professional athlete (if it seems reasonable compared to college scholarship opportunities) or performing artist should take the time to try. I do not think doing random office work is useful. There are plenty of opportunities for dead end jobs, including office jobs in the summer near my home. One can easily find out what he doesn't want to do in the summer. I think a gap year is for structured discovery. If a ds ended in an office job for gap year, I think I'd want to be at least working for a company whose business is interesting to ds. Finally, I would never fund a year of World of Warcraft. Generally, we are striking for college attendance straight from high school. However, if the right opportunity comes up I'd definitely be open to ds pursuing it. Before pursuing gap year ds will apply to college. Hopefully, he will be accepted. Then, if a gap year opportunity comes up he will have to ask for deferment. Many colleges have no problem with deferment now. Some want to know what the prospective student plans to do and require no school attendance during the deferment period (gap year). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathmom Posted July 25, 2008 Share Posted July 25, 2008 Finally, I would never fund a year of World of Warcraft. :smilielol5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Missouri Mama Posted July 25, 2008 Share Posted July 25, 2008 My husband & I do not view college as the only option for training our children in their future vocation. I believe that it is a complete waste of time for some, particularly those who have no established objective in being there other than the push from mom & dad. My 1st daughter is in her 3rd year at her university. Some of her general ed courses were great, but most have been less about equipping students & more about the personal agendas & weird philosophies of the teachers. It is better now that she's in her major. My 2nd will be entering a community college to get her associates degree in a very specific training program but probably not going on to a 4-yr university. She would rather get her training through apprenticeship, and quite frankly, that approach is more suitable to her learning style, personality, and gifting. She is bright & talented & continues to self-educate but would probably "check out" of the learning process if faced with 4 yrs of what my oldest has experienced. We are considering distance learning & CLEP testing with my son (a high school jr) because he can earn college credits while still in high school, shortening his college stay if he decides to or needs to pursue that route for his future vocation. From what I hear, this approach is sometimes motivating to students even after high school because they can earn a college degree faster than going the traditional route. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest collegebound coach Posted July 28, 2008 Share Posted July 28, 2008 I like the idea of a gap year for students who are not prepared to do the college thing right away. Here is a good link...http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24260521/ The year should include different experiences for the student, so that they know what they like and don't like. For example, if a student travels to another country on a mission type trip, they may then favor becoming a doctor to assist missionaries. Other ideas are working fulltime (do they like the grind of the real world) and volunteering. If you would like some ideas on alternatives to college, check out this site...http://www.myfuture.com/t2_beyond.html. It is the military's website; however, this page outlines alternative after high school. Good luck.:lurk5: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoriM Posted July 29, 2008 Share Posted July 29, 2008 We deal with the "gap year" by requiring "14 grades" of schooling, which includes two years at the community college as a dually-enrolled high school student. So, while our child is in college fulltime, she is still a high schooler and under our authority/guidance for course selection, tutoring (if necessary), and continued maturing in life skills. So, since my girls easily complete their traditional high school requirements by age 16, then they can take college-level coursework for those last two years of high school (and also continue some other studies we like to draw out longer, like ethics, rhetoric, and some of the classical readings that we spend much more time on than a standard semester--not to mention their own reading pleasures). My firstborn was then the "traditional" 18 year old when she started at the university last fall, but already held an associate's degree, and was by far more mature and capable of dealing with her "freshman" classes than most of her peers. My younger dd has an entirely different five-year plan mapped out. She and her father are travelling this fall, but when she starts at the CC in the spring she is probably going to pursue an applied program (she's considering Architecture Design or Construction Management) for the first couple of years, and start her own company, before heading on to a university for continued education. She is also considering a gap semester (which could turn into a year) and serving on the mission field--hence the construction management interest. It's likely my husband may go with her...in this instance, it is more a question of our children driving our interests instead of us driving theirs! LOL! I think what's most important with teens is being responsive to their interests and goals, and equipping them to make good decisions with good information about those options. One of my younger dd's best friends is visiting this week, and she's mentioned several majors she's interested in (she's 16), but has no idea where those programs are offered or what requirements they have, so I've been pointing her toward places to answer those questions. We have to make sure we don't try to relive our lives and missed opportunities through our children, but instead enable them to consider wisely who they are and who God intends for them to be in His work in the world. Defining purpose and passion goes a long way into helping a young person maturely approach advanced education. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laughing lioness Posted July 29, 2008 Author Share Posted July 29, 2008 Great thoughts, everyone. Thanks for the links and your input!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackie in AR Posted July 30, 2008 Share Posted July 30, 2008 Here's one more article with suggestions on how to spend the gap year: Mind the Gap!: 11 Amazing Ways to Spend a Year Off Before College Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted July 30, 2008 Share Posted July 30, 2008 My oldest dd is not academic although the expectation has always included post high school education in some form. After high school, she took a 'gap semester'. During this time she worked full-time, enjoyed more freedom and made new friends. Although I would have liked to see her spend that time reading and studying, it's not her. Anyway, by her own choice (with encouragement from mom and dad) she started college, part time, at spring semester. We explored different educational options with her, but she chose our local state university and intends on pursuing a 4 year degree - although at part-time this could be a long process. :tongue_smilie: However, considering that she's never been 'academic', starting with part-time hasn't been a bad idea. She has also moved into her own apartment and completely supports herself. She does have health insurance through her employer. We help with college tuition/books. She talks about taking another semester off and traveling (we have family living overseas). We'll see. My other dd will be starting college full-time in August. She will turn 17 in September so she's ahead of the game some. I don't think a gap-year would have been a good idea for her since I think it could have turned into a permanent gap. Also, she only works part-time and could not support herself during a 'gap-year', and while we are happy to help with a college education (as much as we can with 5 children to raise), we're not willing to support her entirely if she's not in school and/or working. So going directly to college seemed the right move for her although I do worry about her immaturity. We shall see. My other three, I have no idea. Janet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HRAAB Posted July 30, 2008 Share Posted July 30, 2008 Oh, I wanted to add that I have a friend who is a counselor and worked as a high school counselor for some time. She's also lived in Europe. Anyway, she is a strong supporter of a gap year based on her experience with counseling teens and what she witnessed in Europe. I just don't know how this would work financially for a lot of people - especially us. Janet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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